A Year to Clear Read online

  Pull the item out of your closet, drawer, or laundry basket; sit down and lay it on your lap.

  Close your eyes, and notice how the item makes you feel. In the words of Marie Kondo, the famous Japanese organizer and declutterer, ask yourself if the item sparks joy. (Remember, the task is not to get rid of the item so much as to notice the thoughts and feelings that are keeping you from letting it go.)

  When you feel complete put it away, repair it, or release it with love.

  Notice the effect of this simple practice in other areas of your life and write it down.

  Do you notice stuck energy being released by simply clearing, addressing, or tending to just one item at a time?

  Explore

  One item of clothing that isn't working for me is . . . (It makes me feel . . .)

  When I clear, address, or tend to this one thing, I notice . . .

  My closet is teaching me . . .

  DAY 28

  CHECK IN—COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET

  Closets—the real ones and the metaphoric ones—are those dark repositories for storing what we don't want to see (or others to see). This week we used our second skin (our clothing) as a tool to help us come out of our closets, as it were: to shed light on, and shed what gets in the way of revealing our true selves.

  What were some of your discoveries this week? How easy or hard is it to dress in a way that matches how you feel? In what ways do you feel that you are coming out of hiding?

  Explore

  Some of the discoveries I've made this week are . . .

  Giving myself permission to dress in a way that matches how I want to feel is easy because . . . (Notice the part that doesn't feel easy.)

  Some of the ways that I feel I'm coming out of hiding are . . .

  WEEK 5

  MOVING STUCK ENERGY

  Love the moment and the energy of that moment will spread beyond all boundaries.

  —Corita Kent

  DAY 29

  OPEN AND SHUT

  Our home, built in 1875, is cute and quirky. There may have been right angles once upon a time, but with years of settling the seams between the wall and the ceiling are all uneven and most of the interior doors have stopped closing. Many of the traditional double-hung windows don't stay up because their pulley cords are frayed or broken.

  It's not just old-house issues that have never been addressed; we also have new-house problems too, like the framed artwork that still sits on the floor waiting for someone to take two minutes to pull out a hammer and a nail.

  These minor housekeeping annoyances (aka, avoidances) are what I affectionately call “tolerations.” They have been ignored for so long that we forget we have them. The doors stay ajar, the windows get propped open with sticks, the art remains unhung, and we walk around it.

  We adjust. We make do. We deal.

  Tolerations are not just irritations that get ignored. On a deeper level they represent stuck energy. Addressing the issue releases the energy. Pretty simple, really.

  Going away for six months on sabbatical gave us a chance to see our cute and quirky house with new eyes. One quick call to a handyman, and we finally got our doors to close properly and our windows to open. It took us, what, twenty years to make that call?!

  A-may-zing [angels singing here]! And what is even more amazing is that the shift is palpable.

  What is a task you've been avoiding?

  Explore

  One task that I've been avoiding is . . .

  The holding pattern feels like . . .

  Allowing and being with my resistance feels like . . .

  DAY 30

  TOLERATIONS

  Tolerations become the background noise of our life: the frayed bedspread, the box of photos that need sorting, the dirty windows, the squeaky cabinet door, the chipped teapot, the missing buttons, the dripping faucet, the slow-draining sink . . . Can you feel the stuckness in these words?

  Tolerations are also those clearing projects we haven't yet addressed, like taking things to Goodwill, having a yard sale, or calling someone to take away the junk in the garage. Tolerations keep us stuck in a rut and prevent energy from moving more freely.

  Addressing one toleration every day is a surefire way to create momentum, raise the energy, and feel really good! It's also a perfect thing to do when you only have a short bit of time on your hands. Tomorrow you will have a chance to compile a list of your tolerations.

  Today do a scan of your home and simply notice. Notice the things that bug you. Notice how you feel about the things that bug you. Notice your self-judgments around the things that bug you.

  Explore

  The things that bug me are . . .

  This is how they make me feel . . . (Go for it here, with all six senses.)

  I am judging myself for not addressing these issues in these ways . . .

  DAY 31

  MAKE A LIST OF TOLERATIONS

  From yesterday's home scan, compile a list of all the tolerations that need to be addressed.

  Once complete, go through your list and give each line item a number between 1 and 10, where 1 represents a quick fix or high-priority task and 10 represents a longer, multistep process.

  Here's an example list:

  Replace light bulb—1 (easy)

  Replace mildewed shower curtain—3 (two steps: buy the curtain first, then install it)

  Hand wash wool sweaters—5 (not a high priority)

  Clear bulletin board—7 (overwhelming quantity of expired flyers, coupons, faded photos, useless phone numbers; this will take time)

  Tighten screw on shower handle—1 (easy)

  Downsize extra food storage containers—7 (big resistance over this one)

  Declutter email inbox—8 (swimming in emails; this will take time)

  Back up computer—1 (way overdue)

  Refinance the house—10 (multistep process)

  To gain momentum and experience immediate energy shifts, highlight the tolerations in the 1–5 category to be addressed first. Begin with the 1s and continue to chip away until the list is complete.

  Place tolerations in the higher categories (those that require more time or multiple steps) on a separate list, and if possible break each down into smaller, manageable to-dos. Creating a living will, for example, might have sub–line items such as “ask around for names of good attorneys,” “call lawyer to set up appointment,” and “talk to relatives.”

  Once you've compiled your master list, address at least one task per week, beginning with the easier ones (this will keep you from falling into catatonic despair).

  Explore

  My tolerations are teaching me the following about myself . . .

  The first toleration(s) I will address will be . . .

  DAY 32

  SWEEP TO MOVE STUCK ENERGY

  There is another simple way to move stuck energy. It's called the kitchen broom.

  Whenever I feel stuck in my head or I can't find a solution to a problem that I'm noodling on, or my kitchen floor is just plain dirty, it helps to sweep the floor.

  The ordinary act of sweeping is one of the quickest ways I know to energize your life and get centered. Add awareness to this ordinary household activity, and it can also soothe the nervous system, bring you into a meditative state, and just plain make you feel better.

  Sometime today, pick up a broom and sweep one small area of your home. Notice how it feels to sweep with intention.

  Explore

  When I sweep with intention, I notice . . .

  Sweeping helps me quiet the mind because . . .

  DAY 33

  CLEARING IS AN INSIDE JOB

  In case it hasn't yet sunk in, here's a simple truth about this clearing journey: Clearing is an inside job that begins and ends with you. When you clear the clutter on the inside, the clutter on the outside takes care of itself.

  What changes have you noticed in your life from adopting a slower, gentler, and more mindful approach to clearing what holds you
back?

  Explore

  Some of the changes I've noticed in my life from slowing down and being more mindful are . . .

  I know that clearing starts with me because . . .

  DAY 34

  RAISE THE ENERGY

  You know that feeling when you're so happy you could almost explode? That feeling of being in the right place at the right time, where synchronicities abound, and all is right with the world?

  That feeling is real. It's alive. It is you.

  Elizabeth Barrett Browning wrote about this feeling in her poem “Aurora Leigh” back in 1856—she said “Earth's crammed with heaven.” What is one thing you could do today to gain just a slice of this heaven? What action could you pursue with exuberance?

  One thing you might try is listening to certain types of music to change your mood. I find that listening to hot salsa, Latin jazz, or any song by Earth, Wind & Fire when I'm working out at the gym is almost guaranteed to lift my energy level and spirits.

  Do one thing today to improve your mood, and watch how your change in energy affects everything.

  Explore

  Some surefire ways to raise my energy level and get me going are . . .

  One thing I can do to lift my energy right now is . . . (If you notice any resistance, lean into it.)

  DAY 35

  CHECK IN—MOVING STUCK ENERGY

  This week we played with releasing stuck energy by addressing tolerations, sweeping intentionally, and raising our level of joy. Lifting our spirits and lightening our load begins and ends with us.

  Did you notice the energy lifting or shifting this week when you addressed a specific task? What was your biggest aha moment this week?

  Explore

  Stuck energy shows up in my life in these ways . . .

  I know that I'm releasing stuck energy when . . .

  My biggest aha moment this week was . . .

  WEEK 6

  TUNING UP THE SENSES

  Memories establish the past;

  Senses perceive the present;

  Imaginations shape the future.

  —Toba Beta, My Ancestor Was an Ancient Astronaut

  DAY 36

  SMELL

  I can smell things a mile away—people smoking in their cars with the windows rolled up; bread baking down the block; even an opportunity or a scam.

  Having a good schnoz is a wonderful quality to have when you're walking through a flower market, or bathing with a brand-new bar of lavender soap. It is divinely transporting. But this gift can also be an occupational hazard if you're trained, as I am, to tune in to the energy in a disturbed space.

  What keeps me sane as a highly sensitive person living in a highly sensory world is that I don't identify with every “stinky” or strange sensation that I encounter.

  Can you pay attention to smells that are both pleasant and unpleasant without judging them? Try it: Take a deep whiff of your morning coffee, or make a meal that delivers a heavenly aroma. Smell a closet. Smell the earth. Step into the aromatic experience like a curious detective on a data gathering mission.

  What does your sense of smell reveal about you, others, or certain spaces? Do you notice the intensity of a smell changing when you simply witness it?

  Explore

  My sense of smell is teaching me . . .

  When I bring my full awareness to a specific or intense smell, I notice . . .

  DAY 37

  TASTE

  Tasting is one of life's greatest pleasures. Nature offers up a cornucopia of tastes and flavors—sweet, sour, umami, salty, bitter. And as with smells, not every taste is mouth-watering. There are experiences that can leave a bad taste in your mouth. Whatever the experience, our sense of taste can deliver valuable information.

  When I'm space clearing people's homes, for example, I might notice a taste in my mouth that wasn't there before. Dry mouth, for instance, lets me know that I'm processing a disturbance in the environment. A sudden metallic taste is an indicator for me of electromagnetic energies. A medicinal taste clues me in that someone in the home has been sick, or there is a signature of sickness left by a previous occupant that has not been cleared. Because I don't identify these sensations as mine, none ever last long.

  Use today to practice tuning in to and exploring your sense of taste. Try foods that you normally don't reach for. Look for subtleties. Notice if certain spaces generate more saliva or dry you out.

  Practice just observing with this exercise; allow, and do not identify. Notice if paying exquisite attention to a particular taste changes your experience of it.

  Explore

  I'm learning these things about taste . . .

  When I'm in different spaces, I notice these things going on in my mouth . . .

  DAY 38

  TOUCH

  If you're a kinesthetic person, it means that you tend to lead with your sense of touch. You feel your way through a problem and its solution. You love to touch things, read textures using your hands. Bodyworkers and hands-on healers are masters at letting their hands do the talking.

  Hands have a divine intelligence. They know where to go where they are needed the most. If you've ever noticed your hand laying on your belly when it's upset, or on your heart when you're in pain, that would be your body's wisdom at work.

  Your practice today is to tune in to your sense of touch. Reach for fabrics, textures, weights, and feel them with awareness. Notice your impulse to touch someone who is hurting. Notice the vulnerabilities and fears that may arise at the thought of touching someone or being touched. Place your hand over your heart for a moment and notice what happens to your state of being.

  Explore

  I'm learning these things about touch . . .

  When I place my hand on a body part that is contracted or in pain, I feel . . .

  DAY 39

  HEAR

  If you're an auditory person, you'll hear things most people don't. My husband is auditory. He can't help but hear what's being said when someone walks by while they're talking on their cell, and he'll pick up on conversations of those sitting nearby at a packed restaurant. He processes words and sounds like a human antenna, not because he's snoopy, but because he's wired that way. I can be sitting at the same table and not hear a thing.

  Where I get snagged is with loud noises. Any sudden or repetitive sound, such as a car alarm, will make me recoil. Heavy metal music is a full-body assault and plain hurts.

  Are there certain sounds that you are drawn to over others? How sensitive is your hearing? How selective is your listening?

  Today's practice is to tune in with all ears. Pay attention to the ambient sounds around you, noticing which sounds are calming and which ones feel uncomfortable. For contrast, turn on the radio and listen to music that is calming for a minute, then switch the channel to a station that plays loud, jarring music. Notice the effects of each on your mind and nervous system.

  If you cannot avoid certain unpleasant sounds in your life, look for ways to help you selectively listen, such as practicing mindfulness, yoga, and meditation.

  Explore

  I'm learning these things about sound . . .

  These sounds please me . . .

  These sounds hurt my ears . . .

  DAY 40

  SEE

  Have you ever looked for something that was hiding in plain sight? Like losing your reading glasses only to find them literally on top of your nose? Or discovering the missing carton of milk was on the top shelf of the fridge all along?

  Seeing is all about perception. The mind has a funny way of showing us exactly what we want to see and can handle.

  Seeing is also a function of how clear we are in our home, head, and heart. Just like a window that has been cleaned, it's amazing how much more gets revealed through both our physical eyes and our mind's eye when we are clear.

  It was Georgia O'Keeffe who once said, “To see takes time.” What do you want to see? What are you afraid to see?

  Tr
y it: Look around you and allow your eyes to rest on one thing. Take a minute to examine and study it. If it's the crumbs of toast that were left on the breakfast table, for example, notice their shape and how they landed, without judging the mess. Gaze at a flower that's just about to bloom. Look at people's faces on the subway. Study a photograph one day, and repeat the action the next day. Do you see something there you hadn't noticed before?

  Do it for no other purpose than to grow your seeing muscle.

  Explore

  I'm learning these things about seeing . . .

  I want to see . . .

  I'm afraid to see . . .

  DAY 41

  INTUIT

  We cannot talk about sensing without including the sixth sense. Call it divine intuition, inner knowing, your gut instinct. It can be that voice telling you to do or not do something, or that something is about to happen in your life. It is a deep knowing without proof to back it up.

  It was my sixth sense that told me a house my husband and I were about to buy years ago wasn't meant to be. The day before signing the papers with the seller, I was at the house measuring the windows for curtains. Out of nowhere I got a very clear voice that said to me: Don't bother measuring, Stephanie. You will not be living here. The inner voice was accompanied by a visual image of four large windows. These were not the windows I had been measuring. I had no idea where they were.