A Year to Clear Read online

  Deepen your clearing experience when you complete the open-ended Explore phrases at the conclusion of each lesson.

  Integrate your progress when you Check In at the end of each week.

  Shine light on the journey by recording shifts, dreams, synchronicities, and aha moments.

  Download and off-gas any fears, apprehensions, or emotional dips you may experience to lighten your load even more.

  Highlight your successes and triumphs to come back to when your intentions start to flag, get derailed, or lose focus.

  Remember, this year is for you. Give yourself this gift of reflection if you can.

  Traveling Solo or Teaming Up

  There are a couple ways to go on this journey with this book as your guide: You can travel solo, or you can ask a friend or two to join you.

  If you elect to go solo, it will help to have a journal by your side to keep you company. There you'll have an outlet to vent, plan, and reflect, and over time you'll have a chronicle of how far you've come. You can even adopt Julia Cameron's “morning pages” approach (producing three pages of longhand, stream-of-consciousness writing first thing in the morning) to clearing.

  If you could use the support and comradery of one or two others, the Check In lesson on the last day of each week is a perfect time to connect, whether it's in person or via Skype, FaceTime, or phone. Use your time to talk about what your week has been like—your successes and your challenges—as well as your intentions for the coming week. Because this work can go very deep, and safety is everything, be sure to choose partners you trust implicitly, ones who are good listeners and allow you to be completely yourself. If a year feels like too long to team up, select six to ten of the weekly segments to start with, and continue adding more weeks as time and interest allows.

  For anyone who could use the extra clearing support, whether traveling alone or with others, I have created an online resource at AYearToClear.com to serve as a home base. This virtual space is designed as a central gathering space: a place to drop in, connect with fellow travelers who are in same the week as you, read what others are saying about their experiences, post questions, and give and receive nourishing support.

  There is something magical that happens when we witness each other in safe and positive ways. You'll be amazed how many others feel the way you do. And the best part of sharing your stories of triumph and challenge is that you effectively lighten the load—for everybody!

  Let's Get Started

  Are you ready? You are about to uncover the divine mysteries of your most alive and spacious self!

  WEEK 1

  DEPARTING

  The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure.

  —Joseph Campbell, The Power of Myth

  DAY 1

  UNWINDING

  It seems we spend half our lives winding ourselves up, like mechanical toys, and the other half unwinding, or trying to unwind. If we've learned to live well, our unwinding will be even and steady. We'll have energy to spare right up to the very end.

  If we've wound ourselves up too tightly or too fast over the years, however, we'll either find ourselves stuck in a logjam that keeps us spinning in circles, or we'll unwind so fast that we'll careen off the table, hit the wall, and keel over.

  This book will show you how to unwind the slow and steady way. But it also teaches this little mind bender: You are not the wind-up toy.

  Curious about what this might mean? Start by closing your eyes for a few moments, taking a deep breath, and tuning in to your wound-up self. Notice what it feels like to be coiled into a tight ball. Allow whatever is stirring to arise. It could be a word, an image, an emotion, or an experience you had recently.

  After a minute is up, breathe out all thought and tension and imagine yourself being infused with spacious goodness, awareness, and possibility. Take this expanded feeling with you into the rest of your day.

  When you have a moment, consider this question: If I am not a wind-up toy, who am I?

  Explore

  Deepen your experience of this lesson by completing the phrases that follow. They are deceptively simple, designed to bypass the thinking mind and release buried insights (and unprocessed clutter). Don't think too hard or force an answer. Allow your highest wisdom to reveal itself in these responses, and all subsequent explorations from here on:

  Being coiled into a tight ball feels . . .

  It is easy for me to experience spacious goodness . . . (If it applies, notice the part of you that is unconvinced or confused by this concept, and just be with that.)

  Who I think I am is . . .

  DAY 2

  WHAT IS YOUR THING?

  Behind the coiled-up mess that is our stress and our clutter there is an infinitely spacious place one might call stillness, or joy. This is our natural state of being, but we hardly notice it because most of us are caught in a tangle of worry, fear, negative beliefs, material attachments, and endless, mechanical “doing.”

  So what is your thing? In what ways do you resist the whole being that you are?

  Spend today reflecting on these questions, without forcing an answer, and see what pops up. And if you're rolling your eyes right about now, resisting or squirming over how cliché this all sounds, simply allow and notice that impulse.

  One of the key principles you'll be hearing a lot (and exploring) throughout this book is that of observing and allowing events to unfold without doing, changing, or fixing the outcome.

  Explore

  My thing is . . .

  One of the ways I resist being true to myself is . . .

  DAY 3

  YOUR SPACIOUS SELF

  Behind all the clutter and the padding is a you that is spacious and whole, grounded and present. This self can be innocent and curious like a child, deeply happy like a dog on a walk in the woods, giddy like an explorer who has found hidden treasure, or content and complete like a grandma sitting in her rocking chair recounting stories of her remarkable life. This self lives in awe and wonder. To this self, everything looks and feels new and fresh, sparkly and amazing . . . and clear!

  Actually, this self is not really all that new—just new to you! This new, bigger self has been with you all along, waiting patiently on the sidelines to come out and play. I'm sure you've experienced her or him in flashes from time to time. This is the self that laughs a lot, doesn't take everything so seriously, and has a lot more fun.

  What are some traits of your new-to-you self that you'd like to cultivate? Is it your sense of humor? Compassion? Ambition? What are some ways that you can start integrating these traits into your everyday life in small, baby-step ways?

  Explore

  Some traits in my new-to-me self I'd like to cultivate are . . .

  One small way I can integrate these traits into my daily life is to . . .

  DAY 4

  CLUTTER AND CLEARING IN A NUTSHELL

  I wish there was a better word for it. Because of our culture's fixation on physical “stuff,” clutter doesn't come close to describing the myriad ways it shows up in our lives, much less how it affects us and makes us feel.

  I define clutter as anything that gets in the way of experiencing our true nature and best life. Visible and invisible, external and internal, clutter comes in many forms and has many faces. Here are the three most common ones:

  Physical clutter—possessions we don't use, love, or need; things that have no home; things that don't get put away.

  Mental clutter—thoughts and beliefs generated by a fearful or attached mind; noisy chatter.

  Emotional clutter—unprocessed emotions, negative charge, or polarizing behaviors that grow out of the belief that we are separate.

  At its essence, all clutter is a form of low-vibrational energy that sticks like a magnet to things, people, and spaces. It is this invisible side of clutter that creates imbalance in our lives and makes us feel stuck. Today, consider the many ways clutter can manifest, and how it'
s done so in your life.

  Explore

  Some ways that clutter shows up in my life include . . .

  This is how clutter stops me from accomplishing what I most desire . . .

  DAY 5

  MAKE IT LAST

  With all our best intentions and seemingly unlimited resources at our disposal—from container stores to feng shui cures, professional coaching to TV makeovers—why does clutter of every kind continue to grow at such an epidemic rate?

  This is the million-dollar question I've been studying for the better part of two decades. Years of space clearing have taught me what is necessary to create enduring change. For clearing to last, you need to

  Put yourself first. No amount of containers or cures is going to make a dent in reducing the stress and stuff until you've healed the patterns that created them. If you don't feel safe, you will not let go. Clearing is an inside job that begins and ends with you.

  Change your mindset. Clearing is not something you “do,” fix, or squeeze into your life. It's a way of life—a journey—that doesn't always add up, make sense, or go in a straight line.

  Slow down. Clearing old habits and resisting behaviors is not possible until you slow . . . it . . . way . . . down. Slow-drip efforts applied consistently over time are the real game changer here.

  We'll be incorporating all three of these ideas into our practice, but for now focus on one or two to start.

  Explore

  Of the three things needed to make clearing last, these are speaking to me right now . . .

  I know for sure that . . .

  DAY 6

  SHEDDING LAYERS BY SHINING LIGHT

  You know the self? That overwhelmed, sometimes grumpy, fragmented self that has lost the ability to live fully and think big? The self that is fully padded with all kinds of protections (and stuff) to ward off the calamities which “are certain to come at any moment”? The self that feels like there is a simpler way, but can't seem to figure out where it is or how to cultivate it?

  Yes, these are the layers that will be melting away this year.

  Take a moment today to reflect on your experience over the past few days: What is beginning to bubble up as you contemplate a yearlong journey of clearing? Have you been made aware of any revealing dreams, shifts, synchronicities, or aha moments since you began?

  Tomorrow you'll have a chance to check in with yourself more deeply. If you do not yet have a notebook or journal, now would be a good time to get one as you prepare yourself for this great adventure.

  Explore

  What is bubbling up for me as I contemplate a yearlong journey of clearing . . .

  These are the dreams, shifts, synchronicities, and aha moments I've had since starting this journey . . .

  DAY 7

  CHECK IN—DEPARTING

  The focus this week was to provide an overview of clearing and to anchor some intentions for the journey. As with any adventure, it helps to gather some provisions to gain the most out of our experience.

  Take a few moments today to reflect on your goals for the year using the prompts that follow. Use your time, too, to release any apprehensions or worries, and reflect on what it would mean to feel more spacious in your home and life.

  Explore

  Some worries I have about taking a whole year for myself to clear what's holding me back include . . .

  After clearing what no longer serves and supports me I hope to feel . . .

  I hope to let go of . . .

  I hope to attract . . .

  WEEK 2

  CLEARING MADE EASY

  The longest journey you will make in your life is from your head to your heart.

  —an old Sioux saying

  DAY 8

  CONFESSIONS OF A PACK RAT

  My name is Stephanie and I am a recovering (uncovering) pack rat.

  Yes, squirreled away in the dark recesses of my house I still have boxes of things I haven't seen or used in over twenty years. I have food in the freezer that is over six months old. I have a cigar box full of those tiny keys you get when you buy a new suitcase—each pair neatly secured with a twist tie.

  I hang on to more Bubble Wrap and cardboard boxes than I need “just in case.” I have floppy disks containing God knows what dating back to the early nineties (without the computer technology to run them even if I wanted to). Stacked neatly in the corner of my desk drawer is a year's worth of price tags for clothes I've bought . . . and washed . . . and worn.

  Most people who know me as the space clearing expert, a healer of homes, a teacher and devoted messenger of hope to the clutter-weary are surprised when I tell them I am not clutter-free.

  Your home may be free of all excess, or be super organized and neat as a pin, but if you live in a body that thinks thousands of thoughts a day (not all of them positive), feels pain and loss and fear from time to time, gets out of balance, or loses itself in the worries of the moment, I hate to break it to you, but you're not clutter-free either.

  The fact is, most humans suffer one way or another from a condition called “holding on.” Me? I was born with squirrel tendencies based on a deep fear that there is not enough to go around. Softening the hard wiring of my past is my hero's journey that involves consciously clearing one suitcase key, postage stamp, and freezer-burned lump-that-passes-as-food at a time.

  But this is good. Years in the trenches have taught me that we can soften our grip on attachment—slowly and gently—by first naming and feeling the object of our stress and distress. We can release the charge that these issues hold by taking them less personally. We can change our relationship with any thing by clearing it consistently—or just moving it from the floor to the drawer—with compassionate awareness.

  Yes, clearing even a single paper clip or hairball has the potential to change our lives.

  Explore

  One thing or thought I know I'm holding on to right now is . . .

  Naming it here makes me feel . . .

  DAY 9

  FOUR PATHWAYS OF CLEARING

  It took me years to break the code, to identify what could make clearing not only radically simple and sustainable, but also a powerful force for change. I call it the Four Pathways of Clearing—the keys to the kingdom of living clear.

  The basic idea is this: For clearing to work its magic in our homes and lives we need to integrate four key ingredients into a daily routine:

  Intention

  Action

  Non-Identification

  Compassion

  Though each pathway is worthy in its own right, the four working together creates a synergistic effect. Neglecting one would be like taking a leg off a table. The model loses its strength and stability and diminishes the return for effort. But when the four work as a team, even our tiniest one-minute efforts are significant and lasting.

  Don't worry if you don't know what any of these mean. Today's message is just the overview. Over the next five days I will explain them in the context of daily living.

  For all of you who are wired for speed and outcomes, you may have noticed that action only comprises one quarter of the work. This is where you'll be going off-road into a new way of being. Hang in there!

  Explore

  When I think of what my life might look and feel like without friction or resistance, I picture . . .

  The idea of going off-road into a new way of being makes me feel . . .

  DAY 10

  INTENTION—CLARIFY YOUR DESIRE

  You've probably heard the expression, “Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it.” The mind is a powerful generator. Intention is the pathway that helps us clarify what we most desire.

  In clearing it isn't enough to engage the mind purposefully, however. There is a follow-up step that is required once we've put our intention out into the world, and that is to let go of attachment to the outcome. When we detach and allow divine intelligence to take care of the details, we create openings, and even better outcomes, we
couldn't even imagine before.

  What is it that you most desire for your home and life that you'd like to shine the spotlight on this year? Can you feel into your desire and then get out of the way? This is what it means to clear with intention.

  Explore

  My intention for this journey is . . .

  What I notice when I feel into my intentions and let go of attachment to the outcome is . . .

  DAY 11

  ACTION—GO SLOW TO GO FAST

  We definitely need action if we want to get anywhere. As Will Rogers once wrote, “Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.” If intention steers the clearing vehicle, action is what gives it gas.

  Action at full throttle, however, would be like living with sun twenty-four hours a day without the balance of moon and nighttime to rest and recharge. It's too yang. When we live solely to do, fix, or make things happen, we miss a huge opportunity to cultivate the balancing effects of yin energy—receptivity, presence, intuition, surrender—qualities that are only available to us when we slow down.

  Have you noticed that slowing down can actually deliver the goods faster? In what ways can you adopt a “less is more” approach to clearing?