A Year to Clear Read online

  Copyright © 2015 by Stephanie Bennett Vogt

  All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this work in any form whatsoever, without permission in writing from the publisher, except for brief passages in connection with a review.

  Cover design by Emma Smith

  Cover art © Blinka | Shutterstock

  Interior design by Jane Hagaman

  Hierophant Publishing

  8301 Broadway, Suite 219

  San Antonio, TX 78209

  888-800-4240

  www.hierophantpublishing.com

  If you are unable to order this book from your local bookseller, you may order directly from the publisher.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication data available upon request.

  ISBN: 978-1-938289-48-4

  10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

  Printed on acid-free paper in the United States of America

  www.redwheelweiser.com

  www.redwheelweiser.com/newsletter

  To our spacious selves—

  lighting the way and showing us home.

  Stop. Now.

  Whether you know it or not, you are at the end of your search for relief, peace, and meaning in your life. No more seeking. No more wandering. No more waiting. The peace you seek is hiding in plain sight. An open secret. . . .

  Everything you need is already here, unfolding in every instant. Right here, right now.

  —Josh Baran, The Tao of Now

  Contents

  Preface

  Introduction

  Week 1: Departing

  Week 2: Clearing Made Easy

  Week 3: Gaining Awareness

  Week 4: Coming Out of the Closet

  Week 5: Moving Stuck Energy

  Week 6: Tuning Up the Senses

  Week 7: Embracing Emotional Weather

  Week 8: Slowing Down

  Week 9: Releasing Old Stories

  Week 10: Paring Down the Purse

  Week 11: Sensing Energy in Things and Spaces

  Week 12: Connecting with Home

  Week 13: Being Enough

  Week 14: Moving Things, Moving On

  Week 15: Inviting Calm

  Week 16: Turning Up the Light

  Week 17: Soul Calling

  Week 18: Letting Go, Letting Flow

  Week 19: Filters and Perceptions

  Week 20: Dissolving the Illusion of Separation

  Week 21: Taming the Monkey Mind

  Week 22: Cultivating Ease

  Week 23: Tending the Home

  Week 24: Easing Pain

  Week 25: Breaking the Chain of Pain

  Week 26: Taking Time to Pause

  Week 27: Releasing with Water

  Week 28: Letting In the Light

  Week 29: Being Bold, Being Vulnerable

  Week 30: Allowing Imperfection

  Week 31: Waiting It Out

  Week 32: Singing Praises

  Week 33: Cultivating Self-Care

  Week 34: Nourishing Self-Worth

  Week 35: Stepping into Stillness

  Week 36: Homing In on Joy

  Week 37: Feeling Good

  Week 38: Honoring the Past

  Week 39: Cultivating Deep Rest

  Week 40: Getting Good Sleep

  Week 41: Tuning In to Guidance

  Week 42: In-quiring

  Week 43: Embracing Not-Knowing

  Week 44: Supporting Real Ease

  Week 45: Marking Progress

  Week 46: Being with Loss

  Week 47: Forgiving

  Week 48: Spacious Revealing

  Week 49: Loving Up Our Spaces

  Week 50: Dreaming Big

  Week 51: Losing Ourselves, Finding Ourselves

  Week 52: Continuing

  Acknowledgments

  Further Inspiration

  Resources

  Preface

  A Year to Clear was an audacious idea that began as a series of questions: Is a yearlong approach to clearing (our stress and our stuff) too long? Will readers be open to the concept of clearing as a journey, like a hero's journey or a pilgrimage that guides them through the peaks and valleys of their homes and hearts? Is it possible to make a difference in the interior space of a human being in just sixty seconds?

  In a culture of short attention spans and quick fixes, I had no idea if a book like that would, or could, succeed. Would my slow drip method be too light to create significant and discernible traction? Would readers lose focus, peter out, and wonder, in the words of Gertrude Stein, is there a there there?

  So I tried it online as an experiment: I created a 365-day course called “A Year to Clear What's Holding You Back!” that launched on DailyOM on December 31, 2013. Participants would receive an inspirational message in their inbox every day for 365 days. Now, nearly 3,000 people signed up to go on this journey with me.

  As the year progressed, I was encouraged by what people were sharing in the comments section. Unsolicited postings like these made me think that my idea wasn't so crazy:

  I have stuck with this for 40 days and, for once, have not burned myself out with go-go-go. Just drip-drip-drip. Nice!

  Not a whole lot . . . YET . . . has changed in the house, but OMG!!! I so know stuff has changed INSIDE ME! I can feel it, sense it, realize all that I am doing that I've not done before . . . Not frantically, but steadily moving in a FLOW.

  Someplace along in the 80s lessons, I started to clear and things are just flying out of my house.

  I am loving your daily writings; it gentles me in an enlightening way.

  Am I still resisting? God, yes! But the attitude about clearing has noticeably changed from “I HAVE to clear this ALL up or I'll feel lousy” to “I DESERVE to live in a peaceful place” to “Hey, I think I'll create a delicious feeling of calm and order for myself.” . . . The Joy is in the Journey!”

  I have been charting my blood pressure for some time and was concerned because it was often higher than 130. The last two weeks it has been around 120. Am I clearing the Stuff? I know that I am going more slowly . . .

  [This] has blown to smithereens the cliché “You can't teach an old dog new tricks!” I feel the walls of my OLD self crumbling down in a new way.

  Stephanie, I have gained so much from this over the past 11 months that I am going to be lost without you in the New Year. I've loved your Slow Drip method that has actually worn its way into my consciousness day by day.

  At the beginning of the experience, I didn't know how this could work. [Now,] I am about 10 lbs lighter. The lessons made it easier for me to try small changes that let me slide into new ways of being . . . [and] I'd never have remembered all those feelings and thoughts without the journal.

  I am starting this over not because I didn't get it. I totally did . . . I can't imagine a life without checking in. This can't be the end!!!

  Testimonials like these put to rest any question that nourishing ourselves on a daily basis is powerful stuff—and the unexpected benefits continue to reveal themselves in wondrous ways long after the changes have been made!

  Many participants were thrilled to learn that I was creating this book, which, in case you were wondering, is not a carbon copy of the course. Thanks to that experience, and your comments and feedback, the program has morphed and expanded. What you're holding in your hands now has many more features than the daily emails, including personal stories, practical tools, and inspirational wisdom—double the content from last year's course.

  While there's more content, the spirit that infuses these 365 messages remains the same, summarized by my five S's: slow down, simplify, sense, surrender, and self-care.

  I love this book, and I hope you'll love it too. Together, we'll learn what it means to clear at a dee
p level, where spacious detachment rules and awareness changes everything. Enjoy the ride!

  Stephanie Bennett Vogt

  July 2015

  Introduction

  The journey is the treasure.

  —Lloyd Alexander

  With all our best intentions and rich resources, why is it so hard to slow down, simplify, and care for ourselves? Why do most clearing efforts fall short or peter out? Why are we so afraid to let go?

  Our drive to attain and succeed comes at a great cost to the soul. We are malnourished, if not starved, when it comes to compassionate self-acceptance, awareness, and care. We yearn for simplicity but struggle to find it. We ache for balance but can't sustain it. There is no time to juggle it all, let alone clear the things and thoughts that have caused us to feel so overwhelmed in the first place.

  Most traditional approaches do not make room for us to feel the feelings that come up when we clear, and they make us feel bad when we fall short. These linear modalities do not account for our fight-or-flight response, nor do they recognize the energetic impact that our thoughts and emotions can have on our living spaces.

  When people ask me what I do exactly when I am “space clearing,” they are mystified by my reply.

  “Nothing” is not an answer that sits well.

  The truth is that “nothing” is what people see, and everything is what they haven't been able to see. Yet.

  The way I work to restore balance in people's homes and lives is a bit like acupuncture—the ancient Chinese practice of inserting tiny needles into the energy centers of the physical body to release stuckness and improve the flow of chi. You could say that I'm doing the same thing when I'm clearing people and their living spaces. Only in my case the needle is me. What I “insert” to bring about lasting change is pure compassionate awareness.

  Yes, clearing is like “needling” deep into the heart of all of our human fears and attachments in order to pierce and jiggle loose every last bit of squirmy, spasmy, unspacious stuff that's in there.

  It is our ability to be detached and available that invites disturbed energies in a space to magically reorganize and harmonize. Watch a mother comfort her disconsolate child without attachment and you'll know what I mean. After five minutes the child feels all better simply because his mother held a space for him.

  If there is one thing that I hope will come out of your clearing journey this year, it would be an experience of baby-step, cumulative clearing, where spaciousness and awareness rule.

  This book will guide the way. All you need to do is say yes, and take the first step.

  What Is Clearing, Anyway?

  Most people think of clearing as something you “do” to lighten your load and free up some space. Mantras like “Use it or lose it” and “When in doubt, throw it out” are the gold standard of tackling excesses in the basement, closet, and email inboxes. And built into this view is an expectation of instant gratification: As soon I get rid of this nuisance, I'll be happy again.

  There is nothing wrong with traditional methods, mind you. They are perfectly adequate. The problem is that they don't work very well to address the deeper core issues that are buried under all the stress and stuff that keeps us stuck.

  Lurking deep beneath our stress and stuff is unconscious attachment (I might need this someday); resistance (I can't face this. . . . It's too overwhelming); fear (What will happen to me if I let go?); and self-blame (I'm not good enough). “Getting rid of” doesn't help us to release attachments, soften resistance, move through fear, or promote self-care. Nor does it give us an opportunity to wake up to our true nature, which shines through more brightly when we release what's holding us back.

  So even if the stress and stuff gets “handled,” the thoughts and emotions that gave rise to it remain and become a magnet for more stress and stuff. From the soul's perspective, whose job it is to evolve, clearing the traditional way is limited, and, ultimately, not very enlightening nor sustainable.

  What most clearing approaches lack is a key ingredient: awareness. This is the ability to tune in to and observe an experience with the five primary senses (smell, taste, touch, hearing, sight) and the sixth sense of inner knowing—in present time. Feeling and witnessing a task or a stressful situation in the present moment does a magical thing: It releases stuck energy, quiets the mind, helps us detach more easily, and creates openings that weren't there before.

  Add awareness to weeding out the refrigerator, folding laundry, or talking to a difficult boss or family member, for example, and three significant things happen that can change your life forever: You have effectively lightened your load with less effort (even if it's not immediately apparent in the moment); you've created a powerful ripple effect that makes weeding, folding, or talking to a difficult human easier the next time; and you've helped stop the cycle of attachment, resistance, fear, and self-blame—for good!

  At the heart of this book is a whole new—more spacious—way to embrace this thing we call “clearing.” Consider these important distinctions:

  Clearing is not a finite task that you put on a to-do list and complete by a certain deadline. It is an ongoing and revealing journey of self-discovery that starts where you are.

  Clearing is not about freeing up some space. It's about freeing you! It is a gentle process of releasing what is holding you back and nourishing what is calling you forward.

  Clearing is not something you squeeze into your life. It is a way of life. It is daily practice that promotes mindfulness, well-being, and letting go—one baby step at a time.

  Clearing, in any form, lightens. Clearing with awareness, however, en-lightens. You get to choose which way you want to play.

  Time-Released Nourishment

  This book distills two decades of teaching, writing, and personal space clearing in a format that delivers time-release nourishment for the soul.

  From short contemplations, personal stories, tools, tips, new science and concepts, one-minute practices, guided meditations, and wonder questions, each lesson builds upon the others to develop your clearing muscle and grow new habits that will last a lifetime. Each message is designed to work on you all day!

  Though there is no way to predict what will happen as you begin to slow drip these 365 messages into your daily life, one thing I can say is this: To the degree that you're willing to be open to the experience and stick with it, you will not be the same person you are now. As the Buddha says, “What you are is what you have been; what you will be is what you do now.”

  What to Expect

  The 365 daily lessons in this book are organized into 52 weekly segments. Each week usually begins with a personal story to introduce the theme, and ends on the seventh day with a Check In to help you review and integrate the experience.

  The daily messages vary in length. On some days you may receive a short quotation to contemplate during your day. On others it may be a longer message: a new concept, a tool, and/or a hands-on clearing practice. Sprinkled throughout you'll find meditations, Q&As, stories, and testimonials.

  At the end of each lesson you'll have the opportunity to Explore a topic with two or more open-ended statements. These are your “acupuncture needle” prompts, if you will. The phrases are designed to bypass the thinking mind and open the channels to your highest wisdom. They are not meant to be answered in a classic way, but rather to be contemplated and lived. If you take the time to answer these prompts in your journal, they will help you release some buried insights (and clutter) and will deepen your clearing experience exponentially.

  Guidelines

  Following are a few guidelines that will help you gain the most from this journey. Come back to them anytime you get stuck along the way:

  Be open. As you start to peel away the layers of your former self, not everything will make sense to you. Suspend judgment and be willing to not know. If a message mystifies you, just be with that. Your job is to notice and allow any “emotional weather” to arise to the degree that you c
an handle it.

  Receive. Read each message at least twice; once to get the overview and general vibe, and once to deepen your experience. If you can, choose the same time of day to read the lesson and give yourself at least one minute to “receive” its wisdom. Sometimes it helps to reread the message from the previous day before working with and integrating a new one.

  Take your time and keep it moving. You don't want to go so fast that you miss making vital connections. Similarly, be mindful not to be so bogged down in details that you get out of step with the daily rhythm of the journey. If you do fall behind, allow your “missing out” button to get pushed, and catch up slowly as time permits. Use the experience as another lesson in letting go.

  Don't identify. Most of what you'll be feeling is the release of stuck energies that come from the past, from other people, and from your (and other people's) living spaces. Unpleasant sensations usually pass to the degree that you don't make them “yours.”

  Let go of attachment to the outcome. Set your intentions and let them go. Being less attached to a particular outcome will raise your energy level, expand your perspective, and lighten your load.

  Allow silence. Silence creates openings and opportunities to feel. Don't be afraid of it.

  Have fun! This journey is not meant to be a tedious grind (even if you do find some lessons challenging from time to time). It's meant to lift, illuminate, and enlighten you. Enter each day with ease and humor and the details will take care of themselves.

  Don't worry if some of these guidelines feel like too much already. You'll get ample practice in cultivating each one!

  Keeping a Journal

  A journal is a lifeline and clearing's best friend. For a yearlong program like this one, writing down your thoughts and experiences can be a real game changer. Here are some ways to make journaling work for you: