TakeItOffAgain Read online

  We land in what I believe is Kingston and I check my vague itinerary and catch a shuttle that I think is going to my resort. As we drive through the towns I’m wondering what the fuck I am getting myself into. If you have ever been there, you know what I’m talking about. Homeless Americans have better shanties than some of their grocery stores. What seems like an eternity and a hundred small towns later, we arrive at the resort, the world-famous Hedonism!

  As I step off the bus, I see butt-naked girls in the lobby. My kind of place indeed. Life is at a bit slower pace there and that’s just how you want it. But check-in takes a while compared to the Ritz so I have time to chat with the other guests. They ask if I’m there for the contest and I say yes, which immediately makes me the center of attention by everyone.

  I have many questions since this is my first time here and most of the others are repeat offenders. “So people just walk around naked and fuck everywhere?” I ask. “Yeah, pretty much,” they say. “But there are two sides, the nude side and the prude side.” I later find out it’s pretty much all nude sides, but one side is mandatory nudity. As for prudishness, I observe things there that would get you put in prison in the States, so don’t let the title fool you.

  Finally I get my room and I’m told that I will be bunking with two other contestants from the show whom I’ve never met. Turns out they are really cool and super respectful so it’s all good. I quickly set my things down in the room by my bed and go looking for some fun. I meet some couples who are show coordinators and they offer to show me around. The weather is amazing and the beaches are beautiful. I am not quite ready to get naked yet because I know all these people will be at the contest and I don’t want to give them a preview of the goods. I check the resort out thoroughly and it’s starting to get late. I ask where all the action goes down and they tell me it’s a little after dark at the hot tub on the nude side.

  I say my goodbyes and make a beeline for it. I get to the line that crosses to the mandatory nude side, give my cock a few wake-up tugs and drop trou. I have to admit it’s kind of freeing to just be totally naked walking around in public. Maybe all the nudists are on to something. I walk along the path and get to the hot tub. I’m never one to be fashionably late so there are only a handful of people there by this time. I climb in and just observe, alone for a bit. I realize I’m way too early but I don’t want to miss a thing so I will wait it out.

  Around fifteen minutes later, a couple gets in and makes their way over to me. “So how do you like it so far?” the woman asks. I can’t take my eyes off her titties, which are going in and out of the water as she gets closer. “I love it,” I say. She sits down on the right side of me and we start talking. The husband is a big, kind of muscular guy who is stone faced and about ten feet in front of us with his arms crossed and sunglasses on. He’s not talking and he looks kind of angry for some reason. I start talking back and forth with her and I notice her hand keeps grazing my leg. As we talk a little more her leg starts to touch mine. Then she starts to lean a little closer. He still hasn’t moved. I’m wanting to grab her and start having some wild sex right there to get this hot tub party started but I’m not sure if he is okay with it or even if that’s proper swinger etiquette, since I’m not with another girl to join.

  As I’m thinking this, her hand caresses my dick. Instantly I’m aroused and am starting to think, the hell with etiquette. She touches it again and notices it’s rock-hard. She grabs it and squeezes it as if to size me up. Then she starts jerking me off under the water. Could he not know what’s happening? I’m thinking. He hasn’t said a thing or changed his expression once. She starts a faster pace and now the water is churning over me. He has to know now. But nothing. It’s starting to get weird now. He’s looking at me like he wants to kill me and she’s stroking away on my junk.

  Now you’re probably thinking it can’t get any more awkward. Wrong! Just then an older couple climb in and stroll over. Now I’m talking mid-seventies here. She did have a set of perky fake tits, but I digress. I’m thinking to myself, Thank God, at least this will stop what’s going on and take the attention off me. And it briefly did. They all start talking as if they are in a bar somewhere and fully clothed. The old lady sits down to my left and the guys start talking amongst each other. As the old lady is talking to us I notice her hand starts touching my leg. Then her leg starts to graze mine. She leans over and grabs my still-hard cock and starts jerking it. Wait just a damn minute ! I’m thinking. This is just too much too fast, even for me! I tell everyone I need to get back to my room. I climb out with my semi-hard wiener, hang my head and called it a night.

  Day Two

  I wake up for breakfast and then a photo shoot on the beach. Two groups of female models arrive for the week. I see them file in and I want them all. They are some of the most beautiful women from around the world. One of them will be joining in on my photo shoot, which I’m happy to hear. Perfect introduction so I can get in good with this group of models. At breakfast I meet her and she’s with some of her friends from the group. I turn on the charm to the max. It’s not hard since they are all so sexy.

  Picture time. She is wearing a tiny little bikini and her body is flawless. Great smile and a gorgeous ass. We go through our poses holding each other tight. I’m whispering things to her that make her smile. Telling her little jokes and that she’s pretty. After we get done I ask her if she would like to take a walk on the beach after dark. She smiles that cute smile and says okay.

  The rest of the day is fun in the sun in this paradise. Kayaking, working out, eating jerk chicken and lying out by the water. I can’t wait to meet up with my model friend for a nice stroll. Finally it’s time. We meet up and start talking and getting to know each other. By the time we get to the other end of the resort, we are half naked and making out. I find a lounge chair and sit her in it. I pull off her G-string and immediately start going down her. She is so wet it’s dripping off my lips. The noise the waves are making is the perfect soundtrack. She comes on my face as she moans out loud.

  “You have a condom, right?” she asks. I have a couple in my shorts. I grab them off the beach and we switch spots as I get the condoms from my pocket. She begins to suck my cock as I unwrap one. She’s so good at it. She gets it so wet with spit and starts stroking it hard and fast. I slip the condom on, pick her up and put her on top of me. She is so little my cock looks huge going into her tight little pussy. We fuck hard as she comes all over me. She’s making so much noise and her moaning is really turning me on. I’m getting close to coming and a security guard walks up. We don’t stop because we both think it is okay and having the female guard watching is turning me on more. Guard says, “You know you can’t do that on this side.” We were so caught up in the moment we didn’t know we had walked to the prude side. I close my eyes to focus on coming before this gets broken up. I come so good as she watches us. We apologize for the mistake after and walk back to her room laughing about what happened.

  Day Three

  I spend the day on a Catamaran and Jet Ski and the night is mingling with guests and the other modeling group. As I walk around, I soak in the lifestyle. I’m not sure it’s for me but I could see how people would choose this over the monotony of a regular relationship. Hedonism is a place that exudes sex and fantasy. As I walk to my room I notice all the people leave their doors and windows open so you can see and hear their orgies and fetishes. Anything you could want to see right there in the open like an all-you-can-eat voyeur buffet.

  Day Four

  I get up early for couples yoga. Which is encouraged by the entertainment staff to treat hotel guests. I quickly ask one of the model girls, a beautiful Brazilian, to be my partner. We go through an hour of poses like we’re in a game of naked Twister. It’s awesome and I lay the groundwork for a future sex session. After that it’s another photo shoot and some massage contest. I’m not sure what it’s about but I’m told to be at room 2145 in thirty minutes. I show up right on time and knock on
the door. The door is opened and there are two couples waiting. They have sex toys all over the bed and the yoga instructor is lying there half naked. They want to instruct me on what she likes to have done. This is one I’ve never heard of before but what the hell, when in Rome, right? I go through the instructions they give me, feathers, vibrators, furry cuffs, dildos, nipple clamps, oils, cat-o-nine tails. All this while the couples finger each other and the women give their husbands hand jobs. Now the couples start getting it on. The yoga instructor goes and makes out with a wife and I suddenly feel a little out of place. “So I guess I’ll be hittin’ the ol’ dusty trail…” I say. No response from anyone. I grab my things and leave them there to enjoy themselves.

  Day Five

  All the dancers have become the talk of the resort. So many people want me to do their wives that I have to come up with several excuses in advance for when they put me on the spot. Like, “Man, I would love to go bang your wife but I’m next in line for the Jet Ski rental” or “I have to go over sound and lights for the contest and then I’m parasailing.” Between all this and the photo shoots and still trying to work out when possible, it’s starting to wear on me. But who am I to complain?

  By the time the formal dinner is over, I’m ready for some fun again. I see these two couples who are together. They stand out at the resort because they are definitely the more attractive ones in this nudist swinger resort. The alpha couples, it seems. They only hang together so I figure it’s not even worth trying, and I’ve walked by several times hoping to draw a glance from the women, but nothing. I go through the night’s events and end up at my room alone with my roommates. They are new to dancing so I’m giving them some advice about what to do when we hear a knock at the door. One of the guys opens it up and I hear someone ask for me by name. He opens it all the way so I can see her. There is no way this girl wants me, I think. Beautiful thick blonde hair, fitness physique, long sexy legs wearing nothing but high-heel boots and body paint. My roommate says they will leave us alone for a while, smiles and gives me a thumbs-up behind her back so she can’t see, and they leave.

  She walks in and sits on the bed. She is one of the models from the other group I’ve been talking to. We start kissing. It quickly becomes a sexy make-out session and she grabs my hand and pulls me to the shower. The steam fills the room as the water gets hot and fogs the mirrors and glass. We jump in still kissing and touching each other. I can’t even wait for the body paint to wash off. We start fucking like crazy. I can barely see it’s so steamy and wet as our bodies are slapping against each other. I get behind her and grab a handful of her thick hair and fuck her from behind till her cum and the hot water are splashing all over my chest. It feels like something from a movie. She turns around and puts one leg on the edge. I put it in her and she grabs my throat. I feel her manicured nails as she grabs harder around my neck.

  “You wanna come for me, baby?” she says. “Do it, baby! Make that dick come for me!” We keep fucking harder.

  “I’m about to now,” I say and she drops to her knees and strokes my dick ’til I come all over her. It is so good. We dry off and I walk her to her room, both of us wearing nothing but towels. We agree to see each other again the next day.

  Day Six

  Day of the show. All the contestants are getting ready, me included. Early workout and then a little sunning on the beach. After that we all do a little PR for the contest, Getting the guests excited about the show. I’m flirting with all the wives. Through the years I seem to have honed my skills in getting husbands in the swinger community to let their wives tip me. The trick is not to be threatening. You have to be just macho enough to make her want you without being so aggressive that he sees you as a competitor. Downplaying yourself is a must. Don’t ever bring up tips or table dances. Make them ask. That way he feels like it’s his idea for you to get up close and personal with his wife.

  After a quick convo with a wife from Kansas City, it is time for the show. I gather my CDs and costumes and head to the theater to go over the rules. We get our show order and dress for the opening number. It goes smoothly and the crowd is entertained. The first guys go on and the crowd is starting to warm up. I’m up in two guys and I’m getting anxious. I’m dressed early and waiting for my intro. The deejay announces my name, and I step from the curtain into the spotlight that I love so much. For ten minutes, I own this crowd and get a standing ovation from the audience and the contestants. I rock it as if it were my home club. Checks are issued to the winners and I take mine and get straight back to my mission: sex! Let the games begin. I go through the crowd getting handshakes and congratulations from everyone. I give hurried thank-yous as I scan the people for my body paint model.

  She’s at the bar so I walk up. “Good job,” she says. I ask if she would like to walk on the beach with me so we can enjoy some alone time. We leave the busy area and head down to the pier where the sailboats are during the day. We sit on the end of it with our feet in the water. There is a spotlight shining in the water so we can see the fish swimming by and an occasional sting ray. We hold hands in the moonlight and talk about how we wish we could stay right there forever. We get up and continue our night walking along the beach. I stop and grab her for a kiss. As we make out we take our clothes off one piece at a time ’til we are totally naked. We hold each other tight.

  Occasionally people walk by, and it is such a turn-on knowing that they see us. Like some primal erotic sex fantasy that you can only experience in that setting. I imagine us being on an island thousands of years ago in some distant forgotten society. I lay our clothes out on the sand so we have a place to lie. I get on my back and she gets on top of me, kissing me and riding my cock for what seems like an hour. The whole time people are walking and talking within distant eyesight of us along the resort. We finish together and then just lie on the sand together totally relaxed. She tells me this is her last night here but we should keep in touch. I draw a big heart in the sand and put our names in it and take a picture with her camera. We say our goodbyes and head our separate ways.

  Day Seven

  My last day on this island utopia. I relax the whole day away in a hammock and at the buffet. But the night comes too soon and I don’t want it to end. The entertainment staff puts on a show in the dining hall and one of the dancers gives me a rose during her routine. I take it and immediately want to give it to the girl from the photo shoot. Off to her room I go. I imagine her thinking it would be sweet and we could spend the rest of the night together like we did before. I have some pep in my step since I’m eager to see her. She’s on the other side of the resort so it takes a bit to get there, but since I’m really wanting her it seems like a mile away. I get to her room and knock on the door. No answer. Again I knock. Still nothing. I realize I’m not the only one living it up out here. I can only look down and smile. I leave the rose at her door hoping she will know it was from me. That’s the way it goes, I guess. I decide to go relax in the hot tub and enjoy my last night here by myself.

  Tonight the hot tub is THE hot spot. Like the den of iniquity. Sex everywhere. Anything you want to see and don’t want to see. I jump in and enjoy the view. After a few minutes I look over and see the alpha couples come and get in. I’m kind of away from the rest and in true elite form, they go to the less occupied side next to me. “Hey, you’re one of the dancers,” one of the women says. “We really enjoyed your show. You’re the best,” she tells me. And we all start talking about the show and our lives. Conversation is effortless and witty. I feel no pressure and at ease around them since I figure there is no shot at my having sex with these girls.

  One couple leaves early and the other starts to make out so I decide to call it a night as well. But when I start to get out, the wife says, “Hey, can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure,” I tell her.

  “You’re probably going to say no and I’m nervous to ask, but would you like to meet me at my room? If you don’t want to it’s totally okay. I just had
to ask.”

  I can’t believe I’m hearing this. She thinks she doesn’t have a shot with me, not the other way around. All this time and I was scared to approach them. “Sure,” I say, “I would love that.” And just then who do I see swimming over in my direction? The older lady from the first day at the hot tub. She is drunk and slurring her words as she starts hitting on me. She comes right up to me wraps her arms around me and starts trying to suck on my neck. The alpha couple looks stunned by this. The wife smiles and says, “Never mind, I guess you’re going to be busy,” and they exit the hot tub. All this time I wanted her and I’m totally cock-blocked by the older lady. Once again I leave for my room with nothing but a semi hard-on and a bruised ego.

  The next morning I get up early and get on the shuttle to the airport. It has been a crazy week and I’m ready to go home. I’m alone on the bus and want to take a nap on the long ride. When we pull away from the hotel I see a group of people waving at the exit of the resort. As the bus gets closer they turn and pull their shorts down and moon the bus. It’s the famous moon hill. I grin and chuckle to myself, pull my hat down over my eyes and drift off to sleep

  Nude Cruise

  This journey starts in Dallas when I’m picked up by the crew for the long drive to Tampa. We are on our way to perform on the world’s first ever nudist swingers cruise. I can only say it had to have been fate that brought me to this marvelous voyage. A tour manager approached me about an upcoming show on a cruise a few weeks earlier. “Everything is going to be great,” he promised. Good pay, free cruise, lots of fun and I only had to work for a few minutes.

  “Sounds awesome,” I said.

  And he said, “There is only one thing. Your part of the show is to be an Elvis impersonator.” He thought this would be a deal breaker.

  “Hell yeah!” I said. “I love Elvis!” and I started doing my best Elvis moves.