Anywhere With You Read online

  I watched as she started to climb the ladder to the top bunk across from me. Kellen reached out from the bed below and his hand came to rest on her calf, stopping her from making the climb. Her bare feet touched back down on the floor and then she crawled into beside him.

  Their soft whispers broke up the quiet, and even though I couldn’t make out their words, tiny pangs of jealousy went through me at the tenderness and affection in them. I’d never had that before, and even though I still wasn’t convinced it was worth it, I wasn’t so cynical that I couldn’t see the appeal of having someone to share your thoughts and secrets with, someone to share all of it with. The good and bad. Someone to trust and make you feel just a little less alone in this world.

  Then again, the more I thought about it, I realized I did have that and he was laying right below me. I didn’t have to be in love to be close to someone. It was better this way.

  While love might sound nice in theory, the reality of it was something else. Most people threw that word around anyway these days. They didn’t mean forever. They didn’t really mean all that in good times and bad stuff, they mostly meant as long as it suited them, or until something better came along. People are too fickle for forever. People change, feelings fade and then promises got broken and suddenly it’s all, oops, I don’t actually love you anymore, or I never actually did.

  If true love, the kind in old books and movies, ever actually existed, sometime in the last century we took it, warped it, and then broke it. Hell, it probably started long before that, but it wasn’t like there was a specific point in time we could go back to and be like, yup, that’s where it all went wrong. That’s when things went downhill. Nowadays, falling in love was like playing roulette, only the odds were even more stacked against you.

  Then I thought of everything Shae and Kellen had already been through and lost. Against all those odds, despite everything that tried to pull them apart, they found their way back to each other. They were still finding their way back to each other, willing to risk everything all over again.

  Meanwhile, I felt so very far away from found. Maybe the farthest away I’d ever been.

  I wanted them to beat the odds. I wanted them to prove me wrong. I wanted them to make it, to still be holding each other in bed fifty years from now, giving bitter assholes like me something to start believing in again.

  Zara and Marco returned to the room sometime later. I was still lying awake and listened to their shuffling around the room before they fell into bed much the same way we had. It didn’t take long before the room was quiet again. I wondered if Luke was asleep. I wondered what would happen if I climbed down from my bunk and into his, just to lie next to him.

  It was a silly thought. I couldn’t and wouldn’t do that.

  Nine

  Celia

  Six years ago

  February

  The Wild Orchid.

  From across the street, in the fading daylight, it didn’t look seedy. Maybe it was different at night. Or maybe it really was the upscale club it appeared to be. I wouldn’t know unless I went inside. I was still working up the courage to get out of my car.

  My phone buzzed in the cup holder and I glanced down to see it lit up with a new text. The message was from Nat.

  Check in with me after your interview.

  It wasn’t really an interview so much as I was just showing up hoping they’d give me five minutes.

  I’ll let you know when I leave. That is if I work up the nerve to go inside. I’m still sitting in my car across the street. I’m not sure if I can do this.

  It only took a minute for her reply to come through.

  If you’re uncomfortable, leave. Take the student loan and worry about paying it back later, but don’t do anything you’re going to regret. If it makes you feel better, I don’t think I’d have the guts to do it either. Whatever you decide though, it’ll work out.

  I wanted to believe her. Believe that if I just started my car and drove away and pretended like I’d never even come here today, that everything would work out. Unfortunately, I’d seen too often that life didn’t always work out just because you wanted it to.

  I wouldn’t even be here if it did. My call with Aunt Liza last week hadn’t gone as expected. There was no way I could put any more burden on her. I couldn’t ask her for the money. I had officially reached desperate, and there was this tiny part of me that was maybe a little bit curious and had been ever since Nat planted the idea in my head.

  I’m going inside.

  I silenced my phone and shoved it inside my purse. If this didn’t work out, then I would apply for the loan.

  Propelled by my determination and undeniable curiosity, I climbed from the car and made my way across the street. The place didn’t open for another hour, but I hoped a manager or someone would around.

  Before I made it across the street, I noticed another woman, dressed fashionably in tight jeans, riding boots, a loose sweater, and scarf heading for the entrance as well. I slowed my steps just slightly so that we reached the entrance at the same time. She only spared me a cursory glance as she reached for the door.

  “Excuse me,” I cleared my throat. “Do you work here?”

  She paused at the door and gave me a second look. “Yes, can I help you with something?”

  “I’m just wondering, uh, what’s it like working here?” I figured, who better to ask than one of the girls. I just hoped she would be straight-up with me.

  “You looking for a job?” Her eyes did another scan, not hostile, just appraising.

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’m just checking the place out.”

  “Why don’t you come in. I don’t know if the boss is here, but the manager should be. They’re good guys. They treat us well.” That was a relief at least, but didn’t alleviate all of my concerns.

  “I’m Jesslynn,” she said as she reached for the door once more. “Around here, I go by Angel when I’m on the clock, but you can just call me Jess.”

  “I’m Celia.”

  She gave me a friendly smile over her shoulder as I followed her inside. “I like it. That’s a classy girl name.”

  “Do most of you use a pseudonym?”

  “Some girls do, some don’t. Just depends. I like to keep my life outside of here separate. Privacy and all that.”

  “But you enjoy working here?” I asked as my eyes started taking in the interior. There was a short hall, decorated in dark, rich colors which felt warm and sumptuous under the low lighting. The heels of my ankle boots clicked against the stained marble floors.

  “I do.” There was zero hesitation in her reply. “I’m sure you have all kinds of reservations and that’s smart, but if you just toss out all your pre-conceived judgements about the place, I think you’ll be surprised. Anyway, this is it.” She waved one hand as we entered the main area.

  The interior of the club kept to the same feel as the entry we’d passed through. Blacks, reds, chrome, and dark polished wood. It was luxurious without being overstated. I didn’t know how paint and lighting and a bunch of chairs and tables could feel sensual, but they did. Maybe it was the stage that ran down the middle of the room with two shiny stainless steel poles that rose to the ceiling that gave the room that extra something sexy.

  “I don’t see the owner, but that’s the manager, Leo, over there.” Jess pointed out the tall, muscular man on the other side of the room. He had his back to us as he talked to a pretty redhead. “And that’s Brianna, but around here she’s Breazy. She doesn’t dance, only serves drinks. Come on, I’ll introduce you.”

  “Hey Leo,” Jess snagged his attention as we approached. He glanced briefly over his shoulder and then said something to Brianna/Breazy, who nodded and then shuffled off down another hallway.

  “What’s up Jess?” Leo turned to us, his eyes doing a full inspection of me, from head to toe. “Who’s this?”

  “This is my friend Celia,” she smiled at me. “Might be looking for a job, so I�
��ll let her talk to you while I go get ready and warmed up.”

  “Tess is up first tonight, then you’re on, and you go back on with Lu later tonight.”

  “Sounds good.” She turned her friendly smile on me again. “See you later.”

  “So, how do you know Jess?” Leo asked once she’d disappeared down the same hallway as Brianna.

  “I don’t really,” I admitted. “I just met her out front two minutes ago. I don’t know why she said we were friends.”

  “Must like you. So, you’re looking to dance?”

  “Umm, I think so,” I answered lamely.

  “You think?”

  “To be honest, I’m not really sure about this whole thing, but I need a job. One that pays well.” It felt wrong admitting I was here for the money, like it somehow made it worse. But wouldn’t it be worse if I were just here because I liked taking my clothes off for strangers? I didn’t know, but I figured sticking to the truth was my best bet.

  “I see.” His tone was inscrutable and that made me even more nervous. “From the way your eyes are darting around, taking everything in, can I assume this is your first time inside a club like this?”

  I nodded, again sticking with honesty.

  He sighed and folded his thick arms across his chest. “Look, I’m not so sure this is the place for you.”

  “Oh,” I said, unable to hide how dismayed I was.

  “I don’t mean to be crude, but looking at what you got going on under those clothes, physically I’d say you’re about perfect, but it takes more than a pretty face and nice body. I can already tell you’re uncomfortable, and that don’t work around here.”

  “I’m not uncomfortable.” I straightened my shoulders and put on my best display of confidence. “Not with my body or it being on display. I can handle that, I just– I’m nervous because I didn’t know what to expect walking in that door. What kind of place this is …” I said slowly.

  “Then let me lay it all out for you. We’re about the fantasy here. That’s what we sell, but we do not sell the reality, if you catch my meaning. Our girls are treated with respect and their safety is our priority here. We have a strict hands-off policy unless invited by the girls. Any male that comes through that door is required to have a membership. We vet members the best we can, and make sure they are aware of the rules. This isn’t baseball, they only get one strike and then they’re out. For good.

  “Members can pay for a private dance, either out here or in one of the rooms, but it’s up to the girl whether she accepts. That’s the only service we offer and anything else that may go on behind closed doors is strictly at the discretion of the ladies and not a part of our business. There are panic buttons in each room in case things get out of hand, and our security staff is not to be fucked with. What I’m getting at is, nothing happens in here that the girls don’t want to happen.”

  I nodded in understanding.

  “Now, did that cover your concerns?”

  “I think so,” I answered.

  “And you haven’t walked out, so I’m assuming that means you still want a job?”

  Time to make a decision …

  “Yes.”

  “Then I wish I could tell you’ve got yourself an audition, but unfortunately we’re not hiring.”

  I felt my chest deflate. Why had he gone through the trouble of that whole spiel just to tell me they weren’t hiring?

  “But,” and that one little word sparked my hope again, “That doesn’t mean the owner can’t decide to bring another girl on anyway.”

  “And how would I be able to speak with him?”

  “He’ll be in tonight. I can’t say for sure what time. He just likes to show up, but if you want to hang around, I’ll at least make sure he gives you a few minutes. It’ll also give you a chance to see what a Saturday night around here looks like. If that doesn’t send you running, you might get that audition if he likes what he sees.” Leo’s eyes traveled slowly down my body and then back up to my face. It was something I was used to, and thankfully I didn’t so much as blush. “And I have no doubt he will. Grab a seat at the bar and relax. The rest of the girls, and my security guys and the bartender will be showing up shortly, anyone asks what you’re doing, just tell them I said you could be here. I’ll bring the owner to meet you once he shows.”

  “Thank you.” I did as he suggested and claimed one of the stools at the bar that ran along the wall to the right. I’d made it this far, I might as well stick around, get a feel for it and talk to the owner. Leo ambled around, popping in and out of the main bar. Two more girls showed up, eyeing me curiously, but they just passed through and down that hall without a word. I glanced at my phone and took the time to send Nat a quick text, telling her I was hanging around to check it out a little more, and that so far everything seemed okay. Looking at the time, there was still half an hour until open and I didn’t know when to expect the owner to show.

  Would I be sitting here all night? If that was the case, at least I’d get a show, see what I was truly getting myself into, or not getting myself into depending.

  I’d been sitting there another ten minutes, fiddling with my phone and satisfying Natalie’s curiosity the best I could as her questions poured in, when heavy footfalls marked the arrival of someone undoubtedly male. I flicked my eyes toward the entrance and was struck momentarily stupid by the figure that appeared there. Not even joking, my brain short circuited, my heart did a giddy little jig inside my chest and I think I even started salivating like I’d just been served up my favorite brownie cheesecake.

  His gaze landed on me, but his steps didn’t falter. My greedy eyes tracked his movements as he came nearer to the bar and where I sat. Long, thick legs encased in light blue, worn denim ate up the space in a few easy strides. He had to be just over six foot, and athletically built. A white tee clung to his torso, hinting at the tight physique beneath the cotton that looked so soft I wanted to rub my cheek on it.

  “You’re a new face,” he noted while I was still taking in the details of his Adonis like visage, trying to name that deep shade of green that was his eyes. Not quite so bright to be emerald, but not as pale as jade, somewhere in between the two.

  “I’m Celia,” I managed as he rounded the bar and made himself at home back there. “Leo said I could wait here to talk to the owner. I’m not sure where he went.”

  My gorgeous new friend glanced around the room, seemingly unconcerned by Leo’s absence, and then returned his attention to me, tucking the loose strands of sandy blonde hair that fell to his shoulders behind his ears. I knew girls that dropped serious money on hair products to get waves that silky looking and I’d bet money all he did to achieve the look was step out of the shower and maybe run a towel through his hair.

  “What do you need with the owner?” He leaned forward on the bar, bringing our gazes level. If I had to guess, I would have placed him somewhere in his late twenties. The scruff around his jaw added a hard edge to his otherwise soft and almost too handsome features. Those eyes though, they were what was getting to me. Everything else about him was casual, relaxed and disarming, but then you looked into those acute, perceptive, green eyes and you knew he was reading you like a book.

  “Um, a job,” I actually felt bashful, something I rarely did, but this guy was making me nervous.

  As if he’d just now noticed I was female, his eyes dipped down in a slow perusal of my upper half. The way he took his time and didn’t bother to try and hide what he was doing, I half expected him to ask me to stand from my stool and do a slow three-sixty for him. He didn’t, then his eyes snapped back to mine.

  “You a dancer?”

  I shook my head. “I mean, I can dance, but I’ve never done this before.” Unless you counted all the practicing in the mirror last night and this morning. Fortunately, it went better than that first attempt.

  “Then why here?”

  “I need a job,” I answered plainly.

  “There’re a lot of jobs out th
ere, why this one?” His inquisitive eyes held mine intently.

  I decided to lay it all out. “Because, short of taking up residence on one of these downtown corners and doing a lot more than dancing for men, this is the best chance I have to get the kind of money I need to pay my tuition before I get kicked out of school.”

  He took my answer in stride. I supposed working here, he’d probably heard a lot of stories. I was sure every girl that worked here had her reasons the first time she stepped through the door. I doubted mine was anything new.

  After studying me a second, like he was trying to see more than what I’d offered up, he straightened and started to say something else, but we were interrupted.

  “Hey Luke.” Leo reappeared, and provided me with the name Mr. Sexy Bartender hadn’t yet offered up. “Just taking care of some office work and then I’ll be out.” His eyes flicked to me and he offered a slight smile. “I see you met Celia. She’s looking for a job.”

  “That’s what she said,” Luke replied.

  “Okay, well, I’ll leave you to it and be out in a few.” Leo disappeared again as quickly as he had appeared and then Luke went about checking things behind the bar.

  “So, what are you going to school for?” he inquired while he fiddled with bottles and rearranged things back there.

  I laughed dryly. “That’s the kicker. I’m desperate for a job that will keep me in school and I don’t even know what I want to do with my life. I’m undecided at the moment, but I’m in my first year, so I figure I got time.”

  He stopped what he was doing and looked at me appraisingly. “How old are you?”

  “Twenty,” I answered. “That’s not a problem, is it?” I knew they served alcohol, obviously, but it wasn’t strictly a bar. It was a gentlemen’s club and I wasn’t asking to be a bartender.