Redheads are Soulless Read online

  “Sorry, Mr. Franks,” I apologized immediately.

  He tried to look mad, but I could see a smile beyond his angry face. “Since you two like talking so much, maybe you could show Jason around school.”

  “I wouldn’t want to tarnish his reputation like that,” I protested.

  “I’d love for Sofia to show me around,” Jason added quickly.

  Mr. Franks smiled. “Then it’s settled.” With that, he walked back to the front of the room and continued the lesson.

  My mouth hung open in disbelief. What was with this guy? Did he really have no self respect?

  As soon as the bell rang, I grabbed my stuff and was out the door before Jason could say a word to me. I silently sighed in relief when I ran around the corner. I was pretty sure he wasn’t out of the class yet, so he didn’t see where I was going. He may not care about trashing his reputation, but I do.

  I put my Advanced Geometry book back inside my locker and pulled out the books for my next 2 classes. I shut my locker and turned to walk to my next class.

  “Why did you run away?” I heard a familiar voice from behind me.

  Crap. I turned around to see Jason standing directly in front of me. “I didn’t run. I just walked… fast.”

  A couple girls laughed as they walked past me. “Nice dress,” one of them said sarcastically. “How much did it cost? Twenty five cents?” They both laughed hard at their joke. I kept my head down and ignored them. Thankfully they kept walking. But the comment hurt deep. The fact is I had only paid fifty cents for the dress at a yard sale. I swallowed back the knot that was forming in my throat.

  Finally, I looked up at Jason. “That is why you should ignore me. I’m not normal,” I pointed my finger towards him. “I don’t fit in here, and you will be an outcast by association.”

  I could see the smirk on his face. “I… don’t… care…” He emphasized each word.

  “Why don’t you care? Don’t you want to make friends here?”

  “I have a friend – you.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”

  I turned to walk away, and he gently pulled me back. “You don’t see yourself very clearly. You have so much potential. You can’t even imagine.”

  “And you realize this after 30 minutes?” I sighed. “You have no idea how terrible my life is. If you want to be my friend, fine, but you’ve been warned. Feel free to change your mind anytime.”

  “I won’t,” he promised.

  The rest of the day, as promised, Jason followed me to each class. Conveniently, we had 4 of 6 classes together, which was no surprise. My senior class has a whopping total of 54 students.

  After school, Jason invited me to hang out with him. I seriously considered saying yes just so I could miss “Hangover Monday”, but I turned him down in the end. I didn’t want him to think I would be a good friend to have. Plus, who else would keep my mom from OD’ing on Excedrin?

  When I got home from school, my mom was lying on the couch moaning, as usual. I walked past her to the fridge and grabbed her a cold beer and 2 migraine pills. I handed them to her, and she accepted them readily.

  After she took the pills and downed the whole beer in one swallow, she smiled for a moment. “You’re the best daughter.”

  “Mom, you have to get up and get ready. You have to go to work at 6,” I informed her.

  “Can’t I jus’ call in sick?” she whined.

  “No. You called in twice last month,” I reminded her. “If you call in again before the fifth, you will get wrote up.”

  She just stuck her middle finger up at me.

  Gah, she’s so immature. “If you don’t go to work, you can’t afford beer.”

  She sat up when I said that. “Fine! I’ll go, freaking slave driver.”

  It works every time.

  Later that night, after my mom left for work, I decided to do my homework and study for nothing in particular. Every textbook I have, I’ve read a hundred times over. What else am I going to do? We don’t own a TV, I don’t own a computer, and I don’t have texting on my pre-paid cell phone. Let face it, even if I did have a text message package, who would I text?

  Suddenly, I heard a peck on my window. It made me jump. I realized it was probably just a bird. But then, I heard it again. I got off my bed and slowly tiptoed to my window and peeked out my blinds. I jumped when I saw somebody standing there… Jason.

  I started to open my window, but stopped myself.

  “Go away,” I yelled at him through the glass.

  “Nice to see you too,” he smiled. “May I come in?”

  “No.”

  “Come on, Sofie. You said we could be friends,” he pretended to pout.

  “I said we could be friends. I didn’t say you could come to my house.”

  “Please, can I just come in?”

  I rolled my eyes. “Fine. But come in the front door.”

  “What about your mom?”

  I wondered why he just said mom. How did he know I didn’t have a dad? But I just shrugged it off… small town. Of course he had heard everything about my life.

  “She’s at work.” I wondered for a moment if I should have told him that. He could be a psychopath for all I know, but it was too late now. I walked around to the front door, unlocked it, and Jason walked in.

  “Nice house,” he said looking around.

  I wanted to hide my face. My house was what most would call a ‘hole in the wall’. And for a good reason, there literally were holes in the walls. The ceiling was stained from the leaky roof, the carpet was worn down and stained from years of beer spills, and the air smelt strongly of alcohol and stale cigarette smoke. Instead of hiding my face though, I just rolled my eyes. “Did you come here to make fun of me?”

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “I wasn’t making fun of you, Red. Sheesh, calm down.”

  “My name is Sofia, not Red,” I crossed my arms over my chest.

  “Noted.” He smiled, and it made my heart flutter and my knees felt weak.

  Dust literally poured from my mom’s ugly 1980 floral print couch as we sat down.

  Jason nodded to the empty beer cans on the coffee table. “Hitting the alcohol heavy tonight, eh?”

  I wanted to literally disappear right then and there. I started to get up so I could go hide and cry, but he grabbed my arm and stopped me. I didn’t put up much force.

  Jason looked me in the eyes. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  One lone tear rolled down my cheek. Unable to speak, I just nodded.

  He reached up and wiped away my single tear. “I’m sorry I made you cry. I was just making a joke. I didn’t realize it was such a sensitive subject.”

  I took a deep breath before I trusted myself to speak. “Maybe you should just go. I don’t really feel like company tonight.”

  He nodded, walked to the door, turned around, and winked at me. “Goodnight, Sofia.”

  After he walked out, I softly say, “Goodnight, Jason,” to the door.

  That whole night after Jason left, I tried not to think about him. I knew that it was only a matter of time before he started ignoring me, or taunting me, like the other students.

  I wanted a friend. I craved another human being to talk to, especially if that other person was sober. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother, but I just wish that I could talk to her – the real her that isn’t high on pain killers, or drunk on whiskey. I haven’t seen that side of her for many years.

  I sighed. There was no sense in thinking about it. Thinking about it doesn’t help, and only makes me depressed. When I’m down, my mom always suggest I go to the doctor and get depression pills. Honestly, she’d take them all, so what’s the point? Plus, I don’t want to be like her. I made a vow to never take a prescription pill, ever. I didn’t want to take my chances of crazy being hereditary. I’d rather suffer than take the chance of becoming addicted.

  Unable to sleep any longer, I finally got up at 6:30. After a quick shower, I started to put m
y red hair in a pony tail, but it was surprisingly not frizzy. I had never seen my hair so tame, so I just left it down and headed towards school. When I got there, I noticed it was 7:40.

  Weird, I never leave early.

  I decided I would sit in my truck and study for my upcoming history test until it was time to go in. I was interrupted by a tap on my window. I jumped, and then opened my door carefully.

  “What do you want, Jason?” I asked. I grabbed my backpack off my seat and carefully shut my door.

  “I can fix your door, if you like,” he said, eying my door that was about to fall off.

  “Well, it would be fixed, but I don’t have the money to fix it,” I snapped at him.

  He looked shocked for a moment. “Did you honestly think I would make you pay me? That’s what friends are for.”

  I shook my head. “No thanks. Soon, you will make new friends here, and you will forget all about me. I don’t want to owe you.”

  “What do I have to do to convince you, Sofia Black?” He got closer and whispered in my ear. “I’m not going anywhere.” It made me shiver, in a good way.

  I took a step back, and pretended to be unaffected by him. “Well, I am. See you later.”

  I could feel his eyes on me as I walked away. I allowed myself one peek back.

  “Stop looking at my butt,” I said over my shoulder.

  He looked me in the eyes. “Sorry.”

  I rolled my eyes and kept walking, but I couldn’t help the smile that came to my face. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say Jason had a crush on me. But, that’s crazy. No boy would ever like me. And, even if he did like me, it wouldn’t last long. Ignoring him is the best decision I could make, not just for him, but for me too. In the end, he will conform like everybody else, and when that happens I don’t want a broken heart.

  I did a good job of ignoring him for the rest of the day. After school, I didn’t wait around. I just headed straight out to my truck.

  I opened my door carefully, but I didn’t need to. My truck door was securely fastened to its hinges and was no longer in danger of falling off. I blinked back the tears that threatened to escape.

  Jason Morgan, what are you doing?

  He grinned and waved at me from across the lot as I left.

  Three

  Accident

  I managed to make it through Friday without speaking to Jason. I wanted to tell him ‘thank you’ for fixing my door, but I decided against it. I knew it would be for the best if I just left it alone.

  Jason, however, wasn’t any less persistent. If anything, ignoring him made him try harder. On numerous occasions he tried talking to me and even defended me when the other students made fun of me. He quickly recognized my need to be alone and gave me my desired space… But I always caught him looking at me.

  He seemed to be just as much of a loner as me. He wasn’t even trying to make friends, and when other people talked to him, he just brushed them off. He even brushed off the head cheerleader, Marie. I couldn’t believe it. No guy ever turned her down. Why would they? She was beautiful. She had perfect, natural, blonde hair that most people wish they could get from a bottle. She was a perfect size 2. She was popular and had an outstanding personality. She was nice to everybody, except me of course. I envied her. The thought of him turning her down, for me, kind of made me happy in a twisted way.

  When I got home from school, my mom was already getting ready for her weekend out. I threw my books down on my bed and walked back to the living room where my mom sat on the couch drinking a beer.

  “Hey, Sof,” she greeted me. “Did ya have a good day at school?”

  Friday afternoons were always my favorite. Mom was always in a good mood because of the upcoming weekend. She wasn’t completely wasted, yet, and it was almost like I had a normal mom for a few hours.

  “It was good,” I lied. I always lie to her about school. What was I supposed to say? I get made fun of because she’s an alcoholic? That they laugh at my yard sale clothes? There is no sense in ruining her night. I would suffer in silence, as always. Besides, today was sort-of good. With Jason standing up for me, the teasing had cut down a lot. I almost liked him looking after me.

  “I can’t believe you’re a senior this year,” she almost looked as if she were going to cry. “My baby is growin’ up.”

  I smiled at her. In her own way, she is a good mom. She provides food and a place for me to live. Just somewhere along the way, she lost sight of what was right and wrong. Trauma does weird things to people.

  At 6 o’clock sharp, I drove my mom to Billie’s. She used to drive herself, but a few years ago, I suggested driving her since I always pick her up anyway.

  Before getting out of the truck, she turned to me. “I love ya, Sof.”

  “I love you too, Mom.”

  With that, she got out of the truck and walked into the bar. It broke my heart to know that in a few hours I would be carrying her out of the very same bar.

  I drove home with the windows down. It was 85 degrees, which wasn’t uncommon for late September. I love living in the south.

  When I pulled into my driveway, I was surprised at the sight. Jason was standing there beside a motorcycle. I gritted my teeth as I got out of my truck, slamming the door harder than necessary.

  “Sof,” he greeted me. “Get on.”

  He motioned for me to get on the motorcycle, and I shook my head. “I can’t. My mom will need a ride in a little while.”

  “And you’re not allowed to have fun while you wait?” He looked very tempting standing there. He held out an extra helmet towards me, and I took it from him and put it on. I have no clue why I did, but I couldn’t say no. The thought of spending yet another Friday night alone just didn’t sound appealing.

  “Is this your motorcycle?” I asked.

  “Yes, it’s mine,” he said laughing.

  “How did you get it?”

  “I bought it,” he said giving me a duh look. “Seriously, get on.”

  “I need to be back by 11:30,” I said as I climbed on behind him.

  “Ok, I promise,” he answered. “Hold on tight.”

  I did as he instructed, and I wrapped my arms very tightly around his abdomen.

  As we drove further and further out of my neighborhood, I felt a weight being lifted off of me. I liked being on the back of Jason’s bike… even if I didn’t like sitting this close to him, or at least that’s what I was telling myself… I liked the wind blowing through my hair. I felt free and alive. For those few moments, I imagined what my life would be like if it was normal. It felt great to forget about the crazy life I had left behind. I wished that I was leaving for good.

  We eventually did stop though. I was disappointed, but thrilled to be at least out of town.

  “Where are we?” I asked as I climbed off the back of his bike.

  “We are not in Peckville,” he answered, trying to sound mysterious.

  I didn’t push the matter any further. To be honest, I was glad to be anywhere but home. I went to sit down in the grass on the side of the road, but Jason stopped me.

  “Follow me,” he insisted.

  So, I did. I followed him through the path of trees. We walked in silence for about 10 minutes or so before we came to a stop. We were standing on top of a hill in the middle of the clearing. We were completely surrounded by trees. Jason sat down on the grass, and motioned for me to do the same.

  “Look,” I followed his finger that pointed directly in front of us.

  I was speechless by the beauty. The sun was just starting to set behind the clouds. Pink, purple, orange and blue clouds were painted in the sky. I had never seen a more beautiful sunset. Within only minutes, the sun disappeared behind the hills, and I couldn’t help but be disappointed.

  “That was beautiful,” I finally said breaking the silence. It was the first thing that either of us had said in the past 15 minutes. No words were needed. We were just enjoying each other’s company.

  I pulle
d out my phone to check the time once more. It was only 8:30, so we didn’t need to head back just yet.

  “Isn’t your mom supposed to take care of you, not the other way around?” I knew that it was only a matter of time before Jason started judging me. I only hoped it wouldn’t start so early, but just the same, it was probably for the best. I didn’t need to become friends with the guy.

  “Can you take me home? I’m pretty tried.” It was a lie.

  “I offended you, I’m sorry.”

  “No, really I just want to go.”

  He looked me in eye. “I can tell that you’re lying, and I know that I upset you. You may think you hide your feelings well, but to me, they’re pretty obvious.”

  “Why are you doing this?”

  “Doing what?”

  “Being nice to me,” I answered. “Seriously, there is nothing remotely interesting about me. I watched my own father die when I was 10, my mother is a prescription addicted, alcoholic, and I don’t have an outgoing attitude. I’m not pretty. I have nothing good going for me.”

  “You just don’t see yourself clearly,” he said as he turned his face towards me.

  “Well neither does anybody else, obviously. Or maybe you’re not the one seeing clearly. I am a nothing, a nobody. Why are you trying so hard to be my friend? Did somebody pay you?” I crossed my arms over my chest.

  “Why would somebody have to pay me to become your friend? Have you thought that maybe I like being around you?” When I didn’t respond, he continued. “And if somebody doesn’t like you because of your parents, than they aren’t worth your time.” He paused for a second, looking me longingly in the eyes. “You are the most wonderful girl I have ever met. You’re smart, and funny. And you’re certainly not ugly. Your beauty is nearly breath-taking.”

  My heart was beating in my chest so loud, I was certain he could hear it. I opened my mouth to respond when my phone started ringing.

  Crap.

  “Hello,” I answered.

  “Sofia Black?” an unfamiliar voice asked.

  “Yes.”

  “This is Nurse Patricia Oswald at Peckville Hospital. There’s been an accident. Your mother is in surgery right now, but it’s not looking good. You might want to get down here if you want to say goodbye,” the voice said mechanically.