At Her Feet Read online

  I decide on a sleeveless dress with a white top and a pink floral skirt. There are several pairs of shoes for me to choose from. I grab a pair of brown sandals. In the bureau, I find pair after pair of lace and floral panties with bras to match. I pick a white lace set, then get dressed. I want Pilar to do my hair. I find her in her bedroom. She’s dressed and just putting on the last of her makeup.

  “You look very pretty, baby.” I admire her black peasant skirt and her low-cut turquoise shirt. I have to get at those boobs.

  “Thank you. You look very pretty too, Mami.” It doesn’t feel right to call her Pilar, especially after how I behaved at breakfast. “Would you please help me with my hair?”

  “Of course.” She pats the foot of the bed, and I hand her my brush and the hair ties and ribbons I found on the makeup table in my room.

  “I really like all the clothes. Thank you.”

  “You’re very welcome.”

  “How did you know my size?”

  “Just part of my job, baby. I’ve been eyeballing measurements for a long time now.”

  “Oh, right.” I laugh at myself. Clothes are literally her thing. “Should I call you Mami in public?”

  “There. Done.” I look down as she flips the braids over my shoulder. My hair is so long and wavy and thick I expected to be waiting and wincing for a while. I turn to face her. “You look adorable,” she says. “In public you may call me Mami or Pilar. Whatever you want, but here’s what I want from you today. I want you to be on your best behavior. Please and thank you everywhere we go, to everyone who helps us.”

  I know it sounds a little strange that she’s giving me this lecture, but it only fosters my feelings for her even more. I like that Pilar wants me to be polite to people. Who likes an asshole?

  “Best behavior.” I nod with a smile. “Got it. I mean, yes, ma’am.”

  “You’re a silly girl, my little Suzy. Give me a few more minutes and we can go.”

  *

  I was wrong. It’s not a trip to Mexico, but we have our own little adventure. Pilar takes me all over Los Angeles. First, we go downtown to the fashion district. The streets are packed with people and vendors. It’s hot as hell outside, but I don’t mind because Pilar holds my hand. We stop at a few different stores where Pilar picks up more fabric. She lets me select more ribbons, and at this interesting button shop she lets me buy a pair of fairy wings. They’re flashy and impractical, something you’d wear only on Halloween, but they catch my eye, and Pilar lets me have them.

  After, we go to Toys ‘R Us, where she lets me pick out one game and a stuffed animal of my choosing. I admit that I’m content with Frank. Then I have to explain who Frank is. I grab some sidewalk chalk and a pack of Hello Kitty UNO cards. We stop for lunch at a place called MILK that serves a wide array of grilled sandwiches and milkshakes. I finish my lunch before I ask for some ice cream. I get two scoops of peaches and cream in a cone. It has actual chunks of peaches in it. It’s delicious. Pilar treats herself to a milkshake, and we sit outside and have a quasi-adult conversation about summer blockbuster movies. Quasi because I’m a little more animated than usual and doing most of the talking, but Pilar doesn’t seem to mind.

  On our way to the grocery store, she tells me she never leaves the house on Sunday unless it’s a special occasion. “That’s my day off.” So we grocery shop for dinner and food for the next day. In the store an old woman tells me she likes my dress. I say thank you, and Pilar rubs my back as we walk toward the checkout.

  By the time we get home, I’m exhausted. I help put away the groceries. Then Pilar tells me to go change out of my dress. I slip out of my bra and into another T-shirt, then grab Frank. Pilar puts on a soccer game on Univision, then lays me down on the couch with a throw blanket she’s pulled off her bed. It’s four thirty and I’m out like a light. Just like any other Saturday, but this time I’m with Pilar. And Frank.

  Chapter Three

  I wake up slowly. I’ve kicked the throw blanket off, and Frank is under my head. I don’t remember my dreams, but they were strange and perverted. I’m wet. I stretch and, without thinking, slide my hands between my legs.

  Pilar is sitting across the room in her big armchair, knitting.

  “Hello,” she says sweetly.

  “Hi,” I say, but it comes out more like eyeeee because I yawn. And then I pout. “I’m horny.” It’s been a week since I’ve gotten off, and being with Pilar only jacks up my sex drive. Something about her working the needles turns me on, too. She looks so matronly and authoritative. Her hands seem so skilled. I like the way she’s looking at me so I don’t move my hand.

  “You can touch yourself,” she says. I think for a second about how I want this to go down. I love the idea of masturbating for her, but I really want her to touch me, and if I don’t say something now, I know I’ll be kicking myself later.

  “I want you to help me. Please.”

  “Since you were such a good girl today.” Pilar puts down her knitting needles and sits on the edge of the couch beside me. She admires my body before she runs her fingers over my panties and along my pussy. I bite my lip and hold still.

  Her hand slips lower, and she rubs me in earnest.

  “It takes me a long time to come,” I tell her.

  “That’s okay.” She pulls my panties off nice and slow. I don’t wax, but I do trim, and she doesn’t say anything about that. She just strokes my clit, making me wetter.

  “You have a very pretty pussy, baby.”

  The dirty word coming out of her makes me shiver.

  “Thank you.”

  “Do you want me to put my fingers in your pussy?” she asks. She’s still rubbing me. I close my eyes and open my legs wider.

  “Yes, please.”

  She pushes two fingers deep inside me, making me groan. I open my eyes, and I watch her as I start to move my hips. She focuses on my body and I focus on her. I want her. More of her touch, more of her naked.

  I reach forward and rub her breast. She continues to finger me, but she glances up, then down at my hand. She doesn’t tell me to stop. I feel over her bra, over her shirt; the size of her breast is more than enough to fill my palm. I squeeze as she fucks me harder. She pumps in and out, uses her other hand to stroke my clit. I can feel how wet I am. I moan and let out a slight whimper. I rock my hips faster. I’d almost forgotten how good it feels to have someone inside me.

  She pulls her fingers from my cunt and holds them up to my mouth. I sense she’s changed her mind about something.

  “Will you fuck me?” I ask.

  “Yes, baby. I plan to.” I lick her fingers clean then.

  She makes me stand and pulls off my shirt. From that position, I watch as she shucks off her skirt and pulls her shirt over her head. Her black bra and underwear are next. She shifts the throw under her, then beckons me forward to straddle her lap.

  I still love the fullness of her body, but seeing her bare skin makes it so much more delectable. Leaning down, I cup her breasts and suck one of her dark nipples into my mouth. She groans then and relaxes further into the cushions.

  I smile up at her, then continue worshipping her breasts. She makes deep noises of pleasure and holds my head in place. I move to the other nipple. I tease it with my teeth before I suck it between my lips. I take as much of her into my mouth as I can. I suck harder, then rub the flat length of my tongue over the tip.

  Pilar curses under her breath. Her hips squirm under mine.

  Finally, she’s had enough. Her finger is under my chin, and she encourages my lips to hers. We kiss for a long time, and as we kiss, she grasps my butt and pulls me tighter to her body. She’s shifted lower on the cushions so my pussy grinds against her pelvis. I break our kiss and grip her shoulders. I ride her as hard as I can, setting a vicious pace.

  “That’s it. Good girl. Ride me just like that,” she says, and I know the pace suits her.

  I’m close. I’m going to come any second. Pilar turns us suddenly, and I’m
pinned to the couch. She leads the charge now, her slit directly on mine, our slickness mixing. She comes first with a sharp grunt. I kiss her as she’s coming down and keep rubbing myself along her hip.

  I don’t know how it happens for me. I think about her weight on me, and I’m getting hotter and hotter. Her hand slips between us, and she tweaks my nipple. I hold her hand there, enjoying that unique pleasure that I never associate with pain. My hips slow, but I force myself up, and that pressure, my Mami’s tongue in my mouth, her fingers’ grip on my breast, it all makes me come. It’s one of these deep orgasms, so concentrated in my pussy that it becomes the focal point of my whole body. I ride the aftershocks, still kissing Pilar, still rubbing myself lightly against her skin. We move so I’m more on top of her and not the other way around.

  “You’re a very good girl, Suzy,” she says, her voice sleepy. I smile and snuggle closer. I want to play with her nipples some more, so I do, lightly running my finger over the tip. She doesn’t stop me. I think she likes it.

  *

  Saturday night, Pilar makes some steaks, and we eat in front of the TV. There’s a Harry Potter marathon on, and Pilar admits she hasn’t seen any of the series yet.

  “I was waiting to read the books,” she tells me.

  I turn in my seat and glare at her. “Do you really think you’re going to read all of the books? Be honest with me. Be honest with yourself.”

  Pilar bursts out laughing. “You’re right, baby. Let’s watch them.”

  By the time Chamber of Secrets is over, I’m sleepy again.

  “It’s only ten. I have no idea why I’m so tired,” I say as I yawn.

  “You’re letting your body rest. There’s nothing wrong with being tired. Why don’t you go take your shower, and then I’ll tuck you in.”

  I realize she means for me to sleep alone again, and I’m disappointed, but this time I keep my mouth shut. I dig Frank out from the crack in the couch and go back to my bedroom. The adjoining bathroom is nice. I take my time in the shower. When I come out, Pilar has changed for bed as well. She’s sitting in the rocking chair, flipping through a catalog. She’s put another nightshirt on my bed, but no panties. I’m not sure what that means.

  “I just need to put on some lotion,” I say.

  “Would you like some help?”

  For practical reasons, this is a good idea. There’s always a spot on my back that’s a pain to reach, but I’m thinking more about having Pilar’s hands all over me, so I say yes.

  I grab the lotion off my bureau and hand it to her. She works faster than I expect, taking the practical approach. She does my whole back, down to my feet in under a minute. She’s gentle, and her hands are so soft, but she doesn’t even linger on my butt. What’s the point of lotioning up your naked plaything if you’re not gonna linger on the butt?

  She turns me around and squirts a little into my hands so I can do my face while she gets the front of my legs. Again with clinical application, she moves up my body. She rubs lotion over my stomach and between my legs. To my continued disappointment, she lingers there long enough to spark my arousal, and then she’s heading back up to my chest. My breasts and shoulders are done in nearly the same swipe, then my arms. I sit on the bed on my towel, and she does my feet.

  I make sure I’m smiling when she looks up at me.

  “There,” she says with a bright expression. “All done.”

  I thank her and slip the nightshirt over my head.

  We repeat the same routine as the night before. She turns on my night-light, then kneels beside the bed. “Did you have a good day?”

  “Yes, I did. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. I’ll see you in the morning.” She leans over and kisses me on the lips. I want her to shove her hand into my crotch, but she keeps everything aboveboard. She says good night and leaves me alone with Frank and the rest of my stuffed-animal menagerie. I don’t know why I’m upset. We had a great day, and the couch sex was fantastic, but still I want more. Maybe this is why things went sour with Laurel. I was never satisfied. My need for attention was just too much. I wonder if Pilar feels that way. I wonder if she’s the type of woman who needs a little space now and then. I feel like I should ask, but I don’t want to push her. But then again, I’m lonely. And horny again.

  I’m awake for what seems like hours. I check the clock and it’s only been forty minutes. My mind has already decided twenty minutes ago that I’m not spending the night in this bed, but finally my body catches up. I take Frank with me. Pilar sleeps with her door open. I knock lightly on the frame.

  “What is it, baby?” She lifts her head up, but in the dark I can’t see her face.

  I chance it, praying I don’t piss her off. “Can I sleep with you?” I ask. I sound pathetic and helpless, but it’s not an act. I don’t want to sleep alone. Pilar sits all the way up now, and I can see her face in the dim light from the hallway. She squints, but she doesn’t look annoyed. Sympathetic and a little pleased, actually

  “Yes, you may. Come here.” She moves from the center of the bed to make room for me.

  I crawl into the sheets beside her. Pilar pulls me in close and tucks my head under her chin. I nuzzle her breast, and I close my eyes, but still I can’t sleep. It’s that buzz of electricity from being close to her. She brings me comfort, but she also tantalizes me. I take another chance and slide my hand to her breast. I roll the lush weight under my palm and hear her let out a short breath through her nose.

  My heart is pounding now. I’m excited because she’s not stopping me. I slide my hand under her shirt, but as I move up her belly, she sits up and pulls the cotton over her head. Pilar lies on her back, and I feel another change between us then.

  She’s letting me be in control. I kiss her breasts, then neck, and then her chin. I find my legs spread over her stomach and take a moment to ditch my nightshirt. We kiss, and this time she seems eager. She lifts her head, urging me to kiss her. I’m not sure where the confidence comes from, but I do more than kiss her. As our tongues move together, I slide my hand between her legs. She shudders as I stroke her clit. I like drawing a response from her. I move down her body. I skip her breasts and go straight for her pussy. Gently gripping her lush thighs, I lick her slowly. I love her smell and the way she tastes. I love the thickness of her lips, how slick they are. I slide a finger inside. Her fingers slide along the back of my head.

  A noise I can’t control bubbles up from my throat. She grips my hair tighter and lifts her hips. I stop licking her clit and proceed to suck the hard little tip. Pilar is breathing harder. I love how turned on she is. I love that I’m turning her on, but I want to kiss her when she comes. I barely move a full inch back up her body, and her hands are hooked under my armpits. She pulls me up, and we are kissing again. I love her lips, but I miss the little bit of control she’s given me. I reach for her hands again, and she lets me pin them above her head.

  My body is secure in the cradle of her hips, rocking us both up toward the headboard and back down into the sheets. I lose track of any sense of time, not that I even want to mark it now that I’m with her, but I lose all sense of everything that isn’t the skin between us.

  All I can think about is her breasts against my ribs and our slits connecting.

  I think it’s some sort of miracle that I come first. I haven’t let go of her hands, and I know I must be pinching her fingers, but she keeps equal hold on my palms as I whimper out her name. But it’s “Oh Mami,” this time. “Oh, Mami. Fuck.” I can’t help it. Not that I want to. She tells me I’m a good girl, and I come again.

  It’s her. I know it. Sadly, with Laurel, I had to learn when to block the other person out. I had to find orgasms on my own, especially when I felt her slipping away from me. I had to pretend it was Laurel making me come and not my own determination. My own self-preservation.

  Now, though, it’s Pilar. Her skin. Her voice. She wants me and I can feel it. I want to please her.

  Her hands slide down
my back, and she holds me close as she continues to rub against me. I kiss her neck and her lips. When she comes she doesn’t say a word, but I feel her breath on my cheek. Afterward, when she’s holding me, she says my name, then something unintelligible, but it sounds sweet. Either way, I shift closer, and she holds me tight.

  *

  Sunday, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m hyper. Really hyper. I wake up alone in Pilar’s bed. It’s late, almost lunchtime. She’s put Frank in my hands before she left. I hop out of bed and power walk to the kitchen. Frank’s legs are dragged against the wall. I’m sure he’s glad just to be a part of something. Pilar is in a tight camisole and some sweats. She’s whisking eggs.

  She glances at me over her shoulder with a smile. “Morning.” Then she goes back to her eggs. I creep up next to her and sink down to the kitchen floor on my knees. Mind you, I’m still naked.

  Pilar puts down her bowl and looks at me. She’s fighting a smile as she lightly takes my chin in her hand. “Is there something I can help you with, baby?”

  “I know you said Sunday is your lazy day—”

  “I said it was my day off.”

  “I’m sorry. Today is your day off, but I was wondering if we can play outside today?”

  She doesn’t say anything at first. She just does this little thing with her lip. One side juts out and the other side is under her teeth. I wonder if later I’ll realize that this is her tell. This is the face she makes and the thing she does with her lip when she’s about to say yes.

  She runs the knuckle of her forefinger over my cheek. Her hand smells like nutmeg. I realize that something’s baking in the oven.

  “You got me that pretty sidewalk chalk and there’s so much sidewalk out there.”

  “There is a lot of sidewalk. Come here.” I stand up, and then she grips my waist and hoists me up on the counter. She steps between my legs.