Where the Heart Lies Read online

  He certainly hadn’t meant to spend more than a couple of minutes here when he’d decided to bring her some groceries. He’d intended to stop by, introduce himself and leave. Uncomplicated. But somehow when she was sitting on the living room floor staring up at him with half frightened, half embarrassed eyes, her red hair framing her face and clinging to her wet T-shirt, his plans had changed. When he’d peeked into the bedroom and seen her in the chair with Ty’s son in her arms, both so beautiful in sleep that it had taken his breath away, he’d appreciated how complicated this situation could be.

  Now he asked himself again why he stayed, and knew the answer immediately. She’d asked, and he wasn’t sure he had it in him to refuse her anything. He stood, busying himself by pouring coffee into the waiting mugs, adding cream and sweetener without thinking. He heard her behind him and turned. “Sorry,” he said, gesturing toward the coffee. “I didn’t ask how you took yours. If this isn’t right—”

  She took the mug and sipped cautiously. “Perfect.” She gestured to the table. “That was really cool.”

  “The coin?” He shrugged. “One of the tricks of the trade.”

  “Really?” She looked surprised. “What trade are you in? And do you do birthday parties?”

  He laughed and shook his head. “I’m a college professor. Physics. I’ve never done birthday parties, but I like to keep a few parlor tricks in reserve to wake up bored undergraduates.”

  “If I’d had a college professor like you I might have actually enjoyed my physics class.”

  “You didn’t like physics?” He gave her a pained look.

  “Give me a break, I’m right-brained. It’s not like physics is something I actually use.”

  “Seriously?” He leaned forward, comfortable discussing his favorite subject. “You use physics every day. It’s the most intuitive of all the sciences. Everyone knows physics without knowing they know it.”

  “Really?” She took a sip of coffee and considered the statement. “I guess you’re right. The only thing I remember is trying to get the difference between acceleration and velocity.”

  “Remind me to explain that to you,” he said. “But right now, tell me about yourself. What do you do when you’re not taking care of kids?”

  “To pay the bills, you mean? Love books.” At his raised eyebrows, she laughed. “I have a master of arts in library sciences, but I’m not a librarian and never have been. I had hoped to one day be a rare book dealer. In Atlanta I managed the used book section of a megabookstore. I’m planning to take over Ty’s dad’s bookstore now that we’ve moved here.”

  “Well, you’re getting closer to the rare book thing.” He considered her thoughtfully for a moment, then added, “I heard about Jim. I hope he’s doing better.”

  “He’s better, but still weak. I guess he was finally forced into retirement. I’m just glad he and Millie can still live on their own, even if it is in an apartment in an assisted living facility.” She sighed and her shoulders drooped.

  He cast around for a subject that would cheer her. “The bookstore should be fun, though. Jim always loved that place. Ty did too. It’s lucky you’re a bibliophile.”

  “Yeah. We used to joke that all his time spent in his dad’s store was the reason he fell in love with me.” She toyed with the handle of her coffee cup. “Jim’s been great about giving me free rein to change whatever I want.”

  “Really?” He couldn’t hide his surprise, sitting up a little straighter. Jim must trust her quite a bit if he had turned his bookstore over. Or maybe Jim was in worse health than he’d thought.

  She nodded. “Really. I plan to focus on rare books.”

  “Old ones with leather covers.”

  She raised her eyebrows. “You seem to know something about it.”

  He shrugged, looking away. “My mom loved books. I guess I got it from her.”

  They fell silent and he finished his coffee. He looked at his watch. It was nearly eleven o’clock. “I really should go.”

  “You should.” She stood with him. He took their coffee cups to the sink and turned to find her still looking at him. “Thank you. For the groceries. That was a lifesaver. And everything else. I’m sorry I kept you so late. It helped to have somebody else around, though.”

  “Sure. Call me if you need anything. I’m not here much. My parents’ house is a few blocks away, but they passed away a couple of years ago. I live in Chapel Hill.” He took one of his business cards from his pocket and handed it to her. “That’s got my cell number on it. If you need anything.”

  “Sure. Thanks.” She accepted the card, and they stood awkwardly in silence. Liam understood why. He’d crossed several boundaries that evening, some she recognized and others she couldn’t know about. She knows I went above and beyond what a high school friendship would ordinarily call for, though, he thought.

  “Take care.” He held out his hand and she accepted it with a grateful expression.

  In his car, he looked up and saw her standing in the doorway in the light from the single bulb. Moths fluttered around her and she pulled her sweater closer around her shoulders. She raised a hand in farewell as he backed down the driveway. He pulled his car out onto the street. Maybe the best thing for us would be if I went to Chapel Hill and never came back.

  * * *

  Alicia took her time getting ready for bed. Finally, looking at her cleaned, toned, moisturized face and hair brushed to the edge of staticky chaos, she couldn’t put it off any longer. She turned to the bedroom with reluctance.

  The empty bed looked uninviting. One side was turned down and she focused on that neat triangle of rose-colored sheets against the darker wine-colored bedspread. She closed her eyes and pictured Ty on the other side. “This isn’t how I imagined our first night.”

  She climbed into the bed and curled herself into a ball under the thin chenille. The room was warm enough, but cold permeated her body. Or maybe it was loneliness. Ty wasn’t there and never would be again. She remembered the sound of his voice and the feel of his body and let the tears come at last, her shoulders shaking with her sorrow while she tried to keep her sobs quiet so she wouldn’t wake Jason.

  After a while, she slipped from the bed to the hall closet and found another blanket. It was an old quilt, probably one Millie had owned when Ty was a child. She held it to her face for a moment, taking comfort from its age and sense of history. Wrapping it around her shoulders, she got back into the bed, pulled the sheet up to her chin and fell asleep.

  Chapter Three

  Alicia knew her experience managing a used book section of a large bookstore had prepared her well for her new job. She’d worked her way up at the bookstore, doing everything from selling to stocking and buying. Her favorite part had always been the day-to-day interaction with customers, however. Nothing was quite so fulfilling for her as locating that out-of-print copy of a childhood favorite for a mother to give to her son or a rare copy of a first edition to place in the hands of a delighted collector. She hoped eventually to experience that at her father-in-law’s neglected shop.

  The Book Nook was located in the bustling, though tiny, downtown section of Hillsborough. She pulled her minivan into the single reserved space behind the store and took the key out of the ignition. From the moment Millie had shown up at the house that morning to babysit, Alicia had dreaded this moment. She felt so lost, completely without a safety net. “Independent” in the world of bookstores meant there was no corporate structure to back her up. Failure meant disaster. Nobody would come along to bail her out.

  Jim had built a flourishing business before his illness. After his stroke, he’d left it in the hands of a manager who had proved incompetent. When Alicia and Ty began making plans to move to the area, Jim asked Alicia to consider running the store for him. That had been more than a year ago. The store had been closed al
l that time. Alicia looked at the back door of the building and crossed her fingers. Inside waited all her father-in-law’s dreams, as well as Ty’s. She had to carry on for them. Maybe Jim’s reputation would help restore the bookstore to its former success, but she knew it would take hard work to maintain it.

  Taking a deep breath, Alicia got out of her car, feeling as if she were making her way into unknown territory. “One small step.” She fumbled with the keys, finally finding the right one and throwing open the door. Her first breath of old bookstore air sent her reeling back in time to the tiny bookstore her father took her to when she was a little girl. He’d lean on the counter, talking to the proprietor about some recent novel while she looked through the collection of Golden Books on the display. Now, standing just outside this store that had somehow fallen into her lap, Alicia closed her eyes and fell in love.

  With a renewed sense of purpose, she walked into the tiny break room, walked past the tattered couch and old-fashioned kitchen table and chairs. She opened the door on the other side and found herself on the sales floor. Setting her purse and keys by the cash register, Alicia flipped the lights on and looked around with some dismay. The store she recalled from earlier visits barely existed anymore. The shelves of rare books and first editions were depleted. Other shelves had books, plenty of them, but most looked like dog-eared, secondhand paperbacks. She suspected a lot of the inventory wouldn’t be salvageable.

  Old bookstore air evidently meant decay, plain and simple. At least in this case.

  Her feet planted solidly back on earth, Alicia pulled the inventory list from her briefcase and set to work. Her inventory proceeded throughout the morning as she investigated each shelf, marking the titles of the books she anticipated could be sold and tossing those that were too damaged into a cardboard box. As she toted the third full cardboard box into the storage room, she knew she was in trouble. A bookstore couldn’t survive without inventory. Jim’s ex-manager’s idea of inventory had evidently included multiple copies of ten-year-old serial romances and cookbooks. Alicia sat on the box and propped her chin in her hands, wondering what horrible mess she’d gotten herself into.

  “You look like you need a pick-me-up.” Penny peered around the corner from the adjoining break room, brandishing two white paper bags. “How about lunch?”

  Alicia stood, glad for the distraction. “Yeah, that’d be great. I’m starving! C’mon, there should be some dishes somewhere in there.” She moved past Penny, talking over her shoulder. “Seems like somebody’s always bringing me food these days. You guys have been great. I mean, Ty’s old friend Liam showed up with bags of groceries the other night, and now this is the second time you’ve rescued me from starvation.” She paused to flip on the lights in the tiny kitchenette.

  Maybe it was the buzz of the fluorescent lights that made Penny’s silence so obvious. Alicia noticed her friend hesitating in the doorway, the white bags in her hands. “What’s wrong?”

  “I didn’t know Liam had been to see you.” Penny sounded funny.

  Alicia took the bags with a shrug, turning to the formica table in the center of the room. “No big deal. He stopped by. It’s strange, Ty introduced me to him once, but he didn’t talk a whole lot about high school. But then, by the time I met him, he was a career Marine. High school was a long time ago.”

  “I wouldn’t think he’d ever mention Liam Addison.” Penny’s voice resounded in the little room. “Look, Alicia, there’s some stuff you don’t know about Liam and Ty.”

  Alicia turned from the cupboard, two plates in her hands. “Do I want to hear this?”

  “Probably not. But it’ll be good for you. Sit down and I’ll fill you in.”

  How could it be good for her if she didn’t want to hear it? Penny sat, taking a long drink from her coffee, obviously expecting Alicia to do as she was told. In spite of her doubts, Alicia lowered herself onto the cracked plastic chair across from the other woman, setting the plates carefully in front of her. The fluorescent tube above them cracked and sputtered. “All right.” She attempted a solemn tone in keeping with Penny’s serious manner. “I’m ready now.”

  Penny hesitated. “I just—I think you should know some people say Liam Addison is the reason your husband is dead.”

  Alicia blinked. Of all the things she’d expected, this was not one of them. “Really? Hell, let’s call the Marines. I’m pretty sure the boys in Ty’s company would like a word with him.”

  “I know it sounds ridiculous, but think about it.” Penny leaned across the table. “Didn’t you ever wonder how Ty ended up in the military? I mean, he was brilliant.”

  “Sure he was.” Alicia nodded. “One of the smartest people I’ve ever met.”

  “And a natural athlete. So how did he not get a college scholarship? Did he ever tell you?”

  Alicia shook her head. “Just that his parents couldn’t afford to send him to college.”

  “True. But he never mentioned that he had a scholarship and lost it?”

  “He lost a scholarship?” Alicia straightened a little. “Really? Why?”

  Penny picked up her cup and put it down again. “Look, I know how charming Liam is. And he’s not a bad guy. Truly. Please understand that I’m only telling you this because I believe Ty wouldn’t want you getting involved with Liam.”

  “I’m not involved with him. That sounds so sleazy.”

  “Okay. Anyway, it happened in the spring of our senior year of high school. Ty was always protective of Liam, and Liam was a mess. But they were really competitive about girls.” She hesitated again. “Did, um, Ty ever mention we dated?”

  Alicia sat up straighter, unable to hide her surprise. Why wouldn’t he mention that when he introduced me to her? She pushed the doubt away. “No. Just that you were friends. But he didn’t talk much about high school.”

  “Yeah.” Penny looked away for a minute, almost as if she didn’t want to meet Alicia’s gaze. “It wasn’t a big thing. Didn’t last long, and maybe he never really thought about it after it was over. I can see why, considering what happened. Anyway, Ty was at my house and Liam—Liam was a troublemaker—he showed up drunk. To be honest, Ty and I had had a beer or two, also. Liam made a sort of off-color remark about me and Ty knocked Liam out.” She hesitated, picking up one of the plates and putting it back down, her face a little flushed. After a moment, she took a deep breath and continued. “But then he felt guilty about punching his best friend, I guess, so he decided to give him a ride home. On the way, Ty rolled his truck. He escaped the wreck, but Liam was still unconscious and Ty had to pull Liam to safety.”

  “Really?” Alicia smiled, thinking of her husband. He’d always been a hero, then. It wasn’t hard for her to believe. “That’s kind of cool.”

  “Cool or not, Ty got arrested for drunk driving. He had a baseball scholarship to UNC all wrapped up, but they pulled it when he was arrested. And he had Liam to thank.”

  Alicia looked at her friend thoughtfully, toying with the plastic top of her coffee cup. “You know, Penny, it doesn’t really sound like Ty had anybody but himself to blame.”

  “How can you say that?” Penny shook her head. “Seriously? Ty was the greatest guy and, much as I love him, Liam dragged him down constantly.”

  “I’m not defending Liam. Hell, I barely know him. I’m just saying, Ty was old enough to make his own decisions, right?”

  Penny sighed. “Wait ’til you have teenagers, hon. They may be old enough, but they don’t have enough common sense to decide what to wear, let alone whether or not to drink.”

  “Well, Liam was the same age. Ty couldn’t really depend on him to make his decisions. And if Ty was drinking, well, he must have decided to take responsibility for it, because he certainly never claimed to me that his best friend ruined his life.”

  “Maybe not, but everybody was talking about it at Ty’s fun
eral. That’s probably why Liam didn’t come. Everybody agreed Ty should have been able to go to college without joining the Marines. But he did join them, and got a scholarship through them that got him his education but ended up with him dead.” Penny slapped the table hard enough to make the dishes rattle. “That shouldn’t have happened and we all know who was responsible. Liam Addison.”

  Alicia could only recall the sunny day her husband had been buried in his hometown through a haze of pain and loss. She could barely remember how she’d gotten to and from the church, let alone who had been there. She certainly hadn’t heard the gossip she now realized had been whispered around her.

  Uncomfortable with the memories Penny had roused, Alicia reached for the bags and began to unload the food. Penny touched her hand. “I’m really sorry. It’s just…you don’t know Liam. By the time he was sixteen years old, he was the town drunk. His dad wore out the tires on his old Camaro going downtown to bail Liam out when he’d get in trouble.”

  Alicia squeezed her friend’s hand before pulling away. “I know you’re trying to look out for me. And sure, it stinks that Ty lost his baseball scholarship, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t blame Liam for it. And I’m not sure he had any regrets. He loved the Marines.” She hoped she spoke without bitterness, although she had to grit her teeth on the last sentence.

  A moment of silence later, Alicia realized Penny was staring at her. “What?” She tried hard to hide her discomfort.

  “Just wondering what happened between you and Liam.” Penny picked up one of the bags with what seemed like unnecessary vehemence.

  “You can’t possibly think anything inappropriate is going on.” Alicia frowned and concentrated on putting the burger and fries on the plate. “You don’t know me as well as you think if you do. It’s ridiculous to even consider it.”

  “I don’t think so.” Penny studied her doubtfully. “I know how charming Liam can be. Especially when he’s after something. Hell, I dated the man, I ought to know.”