Becoming Hysteric_A Standalone Rock Star Romance Read online

  “Mav?” Leilani finally looked at me.

  “What?”

  “Why have you never asked me out? I notice the way you look at me when you think I can’t see.” Her eyes were locked on mine as my body went numb.

  “I-I…” I didn’t think. I didn’t finish my statement. I just leaned over the oak table and kissed her. The lips I had been dreaming about feeling were finally connecting with mine, and they weren’t pulling away.

  With my hand holding Leilani’s cheek, I looked down at her. “I have wanted to, but I’m not good for you, and also, you’re Dane’s sister.”

  “Can’t I be the judge of who is or who isn’t good for me?” A little smile pulled at the corners of her eyes as I sighed.

  “After tonight, no. I think you’ve lost that privilege,” I teased with a quick wink.

  “I was just trying to make you jealous.” Her admission made me happier than it should have.

  “It worked,” I whispered.

  “Good.” She leaned up and kissed me again.

  “What do we tell Dane?” I asked, knowing he would probably never speak to me again.

  “Can we just wait and see where this goes before we have the entire group judging us?”

  “I kind of like that plan.” I kissed her cheek. “We need to get some sleep before my mom comes out here and gives us hell.”

  “You’re right.”

  I walked Leilani to my sister’s bedroom door. Brushing her hair back over her ear, I whispered, “Good night, good night. Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.”

  “You’re such a hopeless romantic. Quoting Shakespeare like that is really cliché, Steele.” She giggled.

  “Am I really that transparent?”

  She nodded. “So, does this make you my boyfriend or something?”

  “I’ve been your boyfriend since the first time I realized how beautiful you are. You just didn’t know it until tonight.”

  Chapter 4

  Sneaking Around Isn’t Always Fun

  Shoving a note into my hand, Leilani rushed off to class with Julie. “Have a good day, Mav.”

  I hid the paper in my pocket as Dane raised an eyebrow at me. “What gives? You two are usually at each other’s throats.”

  “She’s just being nice because I didn’t let that jerk tarnish her reputation.”

  Dane closed his locker door. “You really are such a chivalrous ass, Mr. Steele.”

  “You know how much I care about all of our sisters. I would have done the exact same thing for Julie or Sheila.”

  “I know, man, and that is part of your twisted-as-fuck charm.”

  I waited until I was alone in my chemistry class, tucked away in the back corner to read Leilani’s note.

  There is only so much I can hide from Dane. He’s going to catch on sooner than later if we are not careful. Try to act more normal. Don’t worry, I know it is only to protect him for now. You’re a dick and I am sassy. Don’t forget why we actually like each other in the first place. I’ll leave my window unlocked tonight. Try to sneak away.

  Yours, Leilani

  I hated lying to Dane. It felt so scummy, but Leilani was right and I knew myself—if I let my history dictate my future, Leilani would just be a notch on my bedpost, and I knew most people wouldn’t understand that I was going to do my best to prove she was not like the rest of my conquests. It was so cliché, but true. Part of it was that I needed to convince myself I wasn’t going to break her heart, and I needed to be sure before I broke Dane’s too.

  Turning into a sap was not the plan, but before I knew it, I was a lovesick puppy ready to do anything for everyone I loved. Dane was family, and Leilani was everything to me. Their lives were shit, and I knew I had to take all of this more seriously than the normal high school relationship. If I was going to be with Leilani, I had to really be with her, completely and without reservations. It was more than a sixteen-year-old boy usually took on, but I wasn’t typical, and neither was the situation. I was falling—probably already had before I even realized it.

  Sneaking into my new girlfriend’s room should have been thrilling, but it was making me feel like crap, because Dane was right next door.

  Lying in Leilani’s bed, holding her in my arms, my fingers rolling through her thick hair…and all I could think about was Dane. What if he came in? What would he say? What would I say?

  “Are we doing the right thing?” I asked as I breathed in the sweet smell of Leilani’s passion fruit conditioner.

  “What do you mean?”

  “This whole sneaking around thing. It just feels like we’re setting ourselves up for failure.” I hated admitting my concerns. I was supposed to be a dickhead who didn’t care either way, but that wasn’t the case and I knew better.

  “What are we supposed to do? Say, ‘Hey, Dane, Mav and I are in a relationship.’ That would go over so well. Like, I am sure he’d just fall off his unicorn with glee.” She rolled her eyes as she shifted in my arms. “Look, we’ll tell him…eventually. I just don’t want this to be ruined by stupid high school drama and friends fighting. Julie would fucking flip her shit, too, and what about your parents?”

  “Fine. You’re right.”

  “Now, kiss me, Maverick Steele, before I start worrying you’re having second thoughts about us.”

  I did as she asked—a lot. I mean, a lot, a lot. Her lips were water and I was dying from thirst in a desert—that level of a lot.

  When I finally came up for much needed air, I rolled my calloused fingers over her Cupid’s bow. “Why me? You’re perfect. I, on the other hand, have a reputation that should scare the ever-loving shit out of you.”

  Cupping my peach fuzz-covered cheek, she gave me that sweet smile, the one only Leilani Pearson could muster. “When I was five, my mom was in one of her terribly mean moods. You found me on the front porch, crying my eyes out after yet another guy left the house as my mom nodded off on the couch from the shit he had just pumped into her veins as payment. Do you remember that?”

  I nodded. “Vaguely.”

  “Well, you put your arm around me and told me to keep my chin up, said it wasn’t just me and Dane anymore, you’d share your family with me, and everything was going to be fine. Ever since that day, I knew I was going to marry you someday.”

  “What?” I couldn’t hold in the laughter that escaped as I looked down at her serious expression.

  She nodded. “I knew from that very moment, as long as we had you and your family, everything would be all right, and that is the moment I fell in love with you. At five, I didn’t know what love really was, but now I know what that little girl was actually seeing.”

  “And what is that?”

  “You, and what a real guy is supposed to be like.”

  “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

  “Because I was a shy, naïve girl who didn’t want her knight in shining armor to turn into a false prophet in tinfoil.”

  “You’re amazing.”

  “And you’re not wearing tinfoil.”

  In that moment, it all felt right—her, me, us. It was exactly how the fairytale was supposed to go. There weren’t fireworks and rainbows. It wasn’t candy-coated. It was real and raw.

  “I love you, Leilani. I think I always have.”

  “And ever since I can remember, I have loved you, Maverick.”

  Chapter 5

  Kings of the Mountain

  “Hey,” I whispered in Leilani’s ear under the stairwell of the back building.

  “Finally! I’ve been waiting here forever,” she exaggerated.

  “Sorry, Mrs. Thomas needed to talk to me about my lab report. Apparently, I did too well and she wanted to know who I was copying off of. Thank you for the help, by the way.” I kissed her cheek.

  “I can’t have a flunking boyfriend. That would make telling your folks that much harder because they’d blame me for distracting you too much.”

  “You’re welcome to di
stract me whenever you want, especially like last night.”

  It had been a few months, and things with Leilani had gotten R-rated faster than I had planned. It wasn’t like I was pressuring her. In no way, shape, or form did I have any intention of corrupting her, but when she asked for me to be her first, there was only so much willpower a hormonal teenager like me could muster. I made sure we were careful and safe and she was actually ready—or at least she persistently told me she was over and over.

  “Are you ready for your first gig tonight?”

  I rubbed the back of my neck. “We’re as ready as we’ll ever be. See you at Mountain Breath around seven?”

  She swiftly kissed me. “A herd of wild horses could not keep me away from that show. The girls and I are going to get ready at my house and we will meet you guys there.”

  “Sounds like a plan.”

  “I think I’m going to puke.” Rodney was a basket case of nerves as he paced in the parking lot behind my dad’s restaurant.

  “Dude, it’s going to be fine.” Dane laughed a little. “It’s not like we suck, and these people eat up garage band grunge like Kurt Cobain is a god or something. Don’t sweat it.”

  “Nerves show I care, Dane. Why am I the only one who’s worried about us sucking up a damn storm out there tonight?” Rodney was acting like a little girl, and none of us knew how to calm him down.

  Colt handed him a plastic cup. “Drink this.”

  “What is it?” Rodney sniffed it and practically turned green instantly.

  “Jäger,” Colt responded without missing a beat. “Shots all around.” He handed each of us a cup and we held them high in the air.

  “To our first gig. Dear God, please do not let us blow it,” I yelled before we all slammed our cups together.

  The black licorice grain alcohol slid down my throat, and we all started coughing.

  “Remind me to not let Colt pick the shot of choice before our next gig,” Dane complained as he wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his flannel shirt.

  “Amen to that,” I replied before tossing the plastic cup into the dumpster. “Ready, gents? It’s now or never.”

  We walked into the packed restaurant where our friends and family made up most of the crowd. My mom waved frantically as I slung the strap of my bass guitar over my shoulder, and I saw Leilani was at a table with Sheila and Jules. I did a generic wave as she gave me a big two thumbs up. I didn’t want the rest of the guys to know it, but I was sweating bullets. Even though I knew we were ready and so solid, there was something about actually being up on stage that made me want to hurl on the spot.

  Rodney cleared his throat before tapping the mic. “Good evening, Mountain Breath! How’re we doing tonight?” he yelled into the microphone. “We’re The Hysterics. Please be so kind as to welcome my awesome bandmates. We have Dane on the drums, Maverick on the bass, Colt is over there on lead guitar, and I’m Rodney.”

  With that, the horde went wild and we kicked off with the melody of an upbeat number that was quickly winning over the crowd. I felt like a damn rock god. I was sweating glitter and my bass was singing out like never before. As the lyrics wrapped around me, I transcended into a euphoric trance of rock and roll.

  The warm breeze blows

  Unease creeping in

  Unexpected and not particularly welcome

  There is an edge to nerves

  They heighten my senses

  Bringing up my guard

  Keeping me armed

  I am not ready to open

  Not ready for trusting

  There is a wall that has started to crumble

  In the darkness cloaked

  My heart has been left exposed

  The words rushed into my brain as Leilani’s eyes stayed glued to mine. She had tears in her eyes as she mouthed, “I love you,” and I shot over a knowing wink as the song came to an end. On cloud nine, we continued our set, and as quickly as it started, it was ending.

  “Thank you, Chicago. Again, we are The Hysterics. Thank you and good night.” Rodney turned to us. “Holy shit!” We were all practically hyperventilating as we started to pack up our equipment.

  “Very impressive, boys. I am so proud of you.” My mom was beaming as she clapped next to the small stage.

  “Thanks, Mrs. Steele,” Dane said as he leaned down to give my mother a quick hug.

  My dad was grinning from ear to ear from behind the bar as I read his lips while he pointed at me, saying, “That’s my son.”

  It was the coolest feeling in the world knowing people loved our music and my folks were proud of us.

  “Way to go!” Julie hopped up next to me, practically tackling me as she wrapped her arms around my neck. “My big brother is a rock star! How fucking cool is that?”

  “It was just our first gig, Jules,” I rebutted, trying to downplay just how freaking awesome I felt in that moment.

  “The first of many, I can only assume,” Leilani added as she took a seat on Dane’s drum stool, helping him take apart his high hat.

  “Is everyone coming over tonight?” I asked, glancing at the other guys and our sisters.

  “Heck yes we are. This awesome display needs to be celebrated.” Sheila was so excited, bouncing next to Colt.

  As we made our way into the house, Leilani rushed for the bathroom.

  “She all right?” I glanced over at Dane.

  “Fuck if I know. She was turning kind of green in the car. Maybe she’s starting to get carsick again.”

  I handed my bass case to Dane. “I’ll go check on her.”

  “Okay…” He gave me an awkward glance before heading to my room to put my ax away for me.

  Tapping on the door, my heart sank. “Leilani, it’s me. Can I come in?”

  “No!” she screamed, but I didn’t listen.

  I locked the door behind me and grabbed a washcloth, running it under cold water. Pressing the cool, damp fabric to the back of her neck, I held her hair out of her face with the other hand.

  “What’s wrong, babe?” I cooed in her ear.

  “I don’t know. I’ve felt like dogshit for a few days now. I thought it would pass, but it is kind of getting worse.”

  My stomach flipped. “Have you taken a pregnancy test?” I forced the words out. There was no part of me that wanted to be having this conversation, but it was the right thing to ask.

  “Ew, no. I just have a bug or something. Trust me, I would know.”

  I sighed. “Just to be on the safe side…I mean, we’ve been careful, but stranger things have happened.”

  “Look, Mav, I’ve got this under control. Just let me puke in peace and get your thoughts away from wherever the hell they are because you’re scaring me.”

  “Fine.” I grabbed a rubber band that was sitting on the counter, threw her hair up in it, and left her there.

  “Is she okay?” Julie asked as I shut the door behind me.

  “Whoa, how long have you been standing there?” I asked, taken aback by my sister creepily hovering outside the bathroom, waiting for me.

  “Long enough to hear what you asked her. So help me God, Maverick, if you do not tell me what is going on, I am going to scream.”

  I grabbed her hand, dragging my sister into her room across the hall. “Fine, but you cannot tell a damn soul anything I am about to tell you, and you have to promise you will not tell Leilani I said anything.”

  She held up three fingers. “Scout’s honor.”

  I rubbed the back of my neck. “Leilani and I have been dating, in secret, for a few months now.”

  Julie punched my chest, hard. “I fucking knew it. I knew you were being too nice to everyone for there not to be something going on between the two of you. But…is she? You know…”

  I sucked in a deep breath. “I have no idea, and she is being a little stubborn about the whole thing.”

  “I need to talk to her about this. Drive me to the drugstore. I’ll buy a test and talk her into taking it.”

 
; “Jules, no. I said you couldn’t say anything to her, and you gave me your word.”

  “Do you have a better idea?”

  I shook my head.

  “Then fucking drive me.”

  Chapter 6

  Failing Tests

  “Who wants pizza?” I asked the group as they all sat in the living room. Leilani was still holed up in the bathroom, and going on a food run was the only cover I could think of to get Julie and me out of the house without getting the third degree.

  “Fuck yeah. Rocking that hard really works up an appetite.” Rodney was rubbing his belly while laughing.

  “Jules, order it up and we can head out to grab it.”

  “On it!” My sister ducked into the kitchen to order a couple of pizzas as I awkwardly stood halfway in the living room, trying to be as close to the front door as humanly possible. Freaked the fuck out was the biggest understatement of the century. What if I was right? Fuck, I didn’t want to be right. I wanted it to be a terrible dream. Cloud nine had crashed and burned into a freak-out I had to pretend wasn’t happening.

  “You okay, man? You look pale as shit.” Dane shoved up from the couch to check on me.

  “Yeah. Totally great. Seeing Leilani puke kind of made my stomach turn a little, but that’s how it goes when a chick is blowing chunks in front of you. I’ll grab her some Pepto or something on the way to the pizza place.”

  “Thanks. You’re a good friend.”

  “I try to be.”

  “Ready?” Julie asked, grabbing her purse.

  “Yep.” I reached for my car keys on the hook by the door and couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

  We sat in silence as I drove.

  “Do you want me to go in with you?” I asked, pulling into a spot right in front of the drugstore.