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  She laughed. “I might’ve been asking.”

  “Oh really?” He cupped her face. “Have dinner with me.”

  “Dinner? Is that code for raunchy sex?”

  “There’s only one way to find out.”

  * * * * *

  “Wow, this is crazy.” Tyler wiped his hands on his jeans as he waited for the waiter to take away their plates. “I’m so nervous you’d think I was thirteen and on my first date again.”

  “You were thirteen?” Nadine chuckled as she took a sip of water. “That shouldn’t surprise me. It does surprise me you’re nervous though.”

  He took her hand from across the table and ran his thumb along her wrist. “I’ve been mentally kicking myself for not running into you the last couple of times I’ve been home.”

  “Well, I understand from your mom you lost someone very close to you. I’m sorry to hear that. It must’ve been hard.”

  “Yeah.” He didn’t want to talk about Becca. Not with anyone, but especially not tonight when he’d just started to feel again. Talking to someone—especially another woman—about what he had with Becca seemed wrong. “How long’s it been since you and Hank parted ways?”

  “Eight months, three weeks and two days. Not that I’ve counted or anything.” She laughed. “You should see how wide your eyes are right now. Seriously, it’s been almost nine months. But I’m as ready to talk about that as you are about your loss. What do you say we get out of here and start sharing that title?”

  Tyler tossed some cash on the table and grinned. “Let’s go.”

  They climbed into her truck and headed toward the opposite side of town from his family. Although he hadn’t been home often he knew very few things changed. A knot of anticipation formed in his nuts when they pulled into her place.

  They made their way to the porch. The house was small, one of the older homes that’d been around when they were kids. She smiled nervously as she fumbled with the keys. “Sorry if it’s a mess. I don’t usually have people over and it’s nothing like the place I had before…”

  He settled behind her with his hands at her waist. His breath fell on her neck and she shivered within his partial embrace. “Just take a deep breath, sweetheart. I’m not going anywhere. You drove, remember?”

  She laughed. “I have you at my mercy then.”

  He groaned. “That could be arranged.”

  She turned to look at him as a blush rushed up her cheeks. She looked up at him with a wide, expressive gaze that seemed to beg “please” while simultaneously screaming “never”. The dichotomy did something strange to him—roused a need to awaken those dark desires she was so determined to keep locked down.

  Even as the thought brushed through his mind and peaked his arousal to a level he hadn’t experienced in—hell he had no fucking clue how long—he couldn’t help but wonder why she was here, doing this.

  With him.

  She didn’t strike him as the one-time woman down to fuck then leave without remorse. The compulsion to question her motives pounded wildly in him, somewhere between his rapid heartbeat and his raging dick. The latter won out. He was a red-blooded dude about to get laid—not a shrink.

  The door opened with a creak and they made their way into the living room. He pressed her up against the door when it closed and claimed her mouth. Her lips were soft beneath his, pliant with desire he felt running within his veins, pounding beneath his skin.

  He lifted her up, wanting to feel her legs wrapped around his hips, her pussy rubbing against his cock. Her hands wrapped around his neck but she pressed down until he lowered her back to the floor. Labored breaths fell between them when she severed the kiss.

  “I-I haven’t done this in a while, Ty. I’m not sure I’ll measure up to your usual expectations.” The slight tremble as she turned undid any thought of leaving. Women lacking self-confidence weren’t his thing but this one was. Again that need to sate those desires he could sense beneath the layer of nervousness made him shiver with a rush of anticipation.

  “You don’t know anything about my usual expectations,” he whispered against her ear. He nibbled there, where the tender flesh raced with desire. “Let’s make a deal. You worry about your expectations and I will too.”

  “Oh.” She relaxed against him.

  Fuck yeah. Her responsiveness fed his ego. He kissed her again and she melted into his embrace fully.

  Although he wanted to sweep her into his arms and caveman his way to the bedroom he knew that wouldn’t be the way to do this. Not with her. He could taste the truth in the hesitant sweep of her lips against his, the soft swipe of her tongue against his.

  He walked them over to the sofa and pulled her down until she was straddling his thighs. A moan escaped her when she sat fully on him. She rubbed her pussy against his erection. Grasping her hips, he held her there as he deepened their kiss, turning it into the possessive, primal quest he needed right now.

  Sweet fucking Jesus. Small pinpricks of awareness burst wherever her fingers swept under his shirt. How long had it been since a woman did this to him? Why her?

  The answer was in her soft laughter when she severed the kiss and the ragged drag of breath she took. Even as he fought not to utter the question ricocheting in his mind he already had his answer—he’d connected with her. Somehow they’d bonded and she’d become important to him.

  He was important to her.

  Each swipe of her fingers along his stomach was followed by a darted glance up, as though she were testing his reaction, his willingness to accept her touch. He reached down and pulled his shirt off in silent acceptance.

  She sighed and kissed him. The hesitancy between them disappeared, replaced by a wanton drag of her lips across his, then down his neck as she sank lower. Deft fingers worked at the jeans zipper.

  Slow it down.

  Her hot mouth kissed along an invisible path until it hovered there, along the small patch of skin now exposed by his parted zipper. If she’d lowered the jeans a couple more inches his hard dick would’ve sprung out of its painful confines but the little minx seemed content to take her time. Each lap of her tongue made the need roll within him until it tumbled out as a growl.

  He reached for her but she grinned and slapped his hand away from her arm. “I’m busy. It’s not polite to interrupt.”

  “In that case, I’m not in any hurry.” He locked his hands behind his head to keep from taking control. “I’m all yours.”

  Her attention returned to the small patch of hair, the triangle of skin she was slowly exposing with each slight tug on his jeans. Amusement flickered in her gaze when she looked up at him. “That’s better.”

  “Just remember, paybacks are a bitch.”

  “Mmm…I think it’ll be worth whatever price I have to pay.” Her voice was a husky whisper, a brush of breath along his skin when she pulled down a little more. “I want to touch you so bad, taste you in my mouth.”

  The plaintive statement broke his resolve to not touch, to allow her this time to do whatever she wanted. Her hair was silky satin as it glided through his fingers. He fisted it and tugged just enough to emit a soft gasp. Her eyes clouded with arousal.

  “I’m a patient man, sweetheart, but everyone has their limits. You’re about to reach mine.”

  She tugged on his jeans harder, releasing his engorged cock as she dragged the heavy denim down his legs until he kicked it and his boots off. Finally. Now all he needed was to get her naked.

  “I want to see your tits.” Her gaze popped up at the blunt statement that was issued as more of a demand than a request. She swallowed a couple of times before sitting back on her heels. Trembling fingers worked at removing the top.

  She avoided eye contact and for some reason that bothered him. He wanted her to see how turned-on he was by her. “Eyes on me, Nadine. Only me.”

  The control shifted within the room with the command, the visible release of tension in her body as she complied without hesitation. “You’re so sweet.
Beautiful. I don’t deserve you.”

  She chewed on her lower lip as though chewing on a response. He waited but she reached behind her and unfastened her bra instead, flinging it aside.

  Holy crap. She was gorgeous. She closed the distance between them until he could lean forward and cup each mound in a hand, weighing and testing their responsiveness with a flick of his thumbs across the already hardened nipples.

  “Are you wet for me, Nadine?”

  “Yes.”

  “I can’t wait to taste you.”

  She shivered. Her eyelids fluttered shut.

  “Eyes open, Nadine. That’s my only rule.”

  “I didn’t realize we could invoke rules.” She captured his gaze. “Do I get to make one too?”

  Amused, he cocked his head and pinched her nipples until she cried out. “What would your rule be?”

  “We leave the ghosts of our past outside, away from whatever this is.” Her voice was a whisper against his hard shaft. She swiped her tongue along the tip before sinking her hot mouth down onto his length.

  He groaned at the velvety heat enveloping his dick one agonizing inch at a time. The slow, sultry foray of her tongue along his skin followed the same tortuous glide of her fingers along his balls.

  “Sweetheart, I’m about to lose it.” He pulled her off him and lifted her up. Her startled gasp made him smile as he moved down the hall and toward what he hoped was the bedroom.

  Or the bathroom.

  Suddenly lathering her up and sharing a steamy shower sounded like a darned good way to spend some time. There’d be plenty of time for that later.

  He deposited her on the bed and claimed her mouth. Her lips were pliant, hesitant beneath his. Had she had anyone else since Hank? The question burrowed through his consciousness, made him question each move as he maneuvered to remove her clothing.

  The way she responded to his touch, accepted his will so easily, brought out the dominance in his nature—the dormant beast he’d caged after Becca’s death. The various facets of his sexual nature hadn’t been worth enjoying without her. The trust he’d developed, now needed, couldn’t be found with the one-night stands he’d been offered.

  He’d needed more after her. He needed someone to want the real him—to see the real man buried beneath the wild facade he’d spun. No one had bothered.

  Except Becca.

  But something within him—a yearning he’d never quite killed off—swelled in him as he realized Nadine could be more. Whatever she’d heard of his wild lifestyle hadn’t scared her off, despite the bullshit her ex had put her through.

  Maybe he was fooling himself, diving headfirst into a pool drained dry. All he knew was he wanted this to be special, something both of them could reflect on later in life.

  He wanted her to know she was more than a one-time fuck.

  Touching and tasting her beautiful skin was like a walk in the park. The soft gasps and moans she emitted washed away the remnants of numbness and incited bursts of pleasure along his skin as she followed his lead.

  He settled between her legs and pressed her thighs apart, even though she vehemently shook her head. “No. You don’t have to…”

  “You know you can’t stop me, sweetheart.” Tyler grinned. “I promise you I know what I’m doing.”

  “But I don’t,” she whispered.

  The confession slowed his actions. He kissed her knee and massaged his way up her thighs. “Relax and trust me. I’ll take care of you.”

  He continued massaging and kissing her inner thighs, her stomach, everywhere but where he wanted to be until he felt her relax beneath him. Her ragged breathing matched his and he knew he wouldn’t last much longer.

  He ran a finger across the seam of her pussy and suppressed his groan when he swept it into his mouth, the taste of her arousal now on his tongue. Leaning down, he tasted her fully, not stopping until his tongue was buried within the pussy his dick was throbbing to feel around it.

  His finger returned, pumping in and out in a slow, steady rhythm that her hips followed easily. Desire flared within him with each gasp and moan. When he settled his mouth around her clit, her entire body tensed and her pussy clenched his finger as she surrendered to a wave of pleasure he was determined she’d ride again and again.

  “Ty, please.” Her fingers grasped his hair, pressed on his head as she ground against him. He groaned and sucked her clit, flicking his tongue along the sensitive nub until another wave of sensation swept her away.

  He withdrew from between her legs and made quick work of rolling a condom onto his cock. If he didn’t get in her soon he’d explode. He claimed her mouth with a primal need he hadn’t felt in a hell of a long time. Her body felt soft, warm beneath his as he thrust slowly into her wet, tight sheath.

  “Holy shit, you feel good around me, sweetheart.”

  “Oh God. I can’t believe you’re really in me.” She gasped when he thrust deeper. “Fuck me hard, Ty. Please.”

  He positioned her knees to her shoulders and surrendered to the need to fuck her hard, deep—until the need to possess her fully was sated. His mind spun with a list of things he wanted to do with her—to her—tonight. Waves of pleasure burst through his body, culminating where they were connected.

  Her hands were above her head, as if she were silently offering herself as a sacrifice to the raging desire building between them. The submissive stance made him fuck her harder until they both screamed their releases and collapsed in a tangle of limbs and labored breaths.

  Wow.

  He settled on the bed beside her and dragged her into his embrace. He didn’t want to sleep. He didn’t want to do anything but repeat exactly what they’d just done. Again and again.

  The tension he’d carried slowly dissipated and his eyes closed. Suddenly coming home to Big Horn didn’t seem all that bad.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The dull roar of the gathering crowd drew Jason to reality but the regret and loss of the times they’d recounted lingered. Titanium’s laughter tunneled from the event room behind them. His gut clenched as though unseen fingers of jealousy manacled him with an awareness that he wasn’t as unaffected by the past as he’d hoped.

  Time had passed but the connection, the emotions he’d had for Jeanie were still there—dormant but very much alive. He chanced a glance over at Tyler but he’d been bitten by the same need to be anywhere but here, where the glory years were bittersweet memories of times they couldn’t change even if they wanted to.

  Truth be told, he wouldn’t have changed a thing. Okay, maybe he would’ve fought harder to stake his claim on Jeanie—make sure she knew she had mattered to him in a way he hadn’t been prepared to accept or admit back then.

  Funny. He’d worked like hell to be the tough shit who’d overcome his past and made something of himself. But somehow he’d lost his true purpose along the way—to be happy. Yeah, the parties had been a blast. The money had been insane.

  But…then what?

  “Not much longer before we’ll have to head out or hang around for the torture session.” Tyler’s hand trembled as he took a sip of water. “I think this new karaoke Friday is Mrs. Flannery’s way of punishing me.”

  “No shit.” Jason shook his head as if the motion could shake away the past’s death grip. “I can’t seem to let it go, man.”

  “It, or her?” Tyler set the glass down beside him. “Maybe you aren’t supposed to.”

  “I had my chance a hell of a long time ago and fucked it up.”

  “Who’s to say your chance hasn’t come back around? You know, that circle of life bullshit or whatever.”

  “Hakuna matata.” The man had a point. “Funny. I sometimes wonder if us being here was fate stepping in and shoving us back on the right path or something. Probably sounds crazy, huh?”

  Tyler shrugged. “Hard to say. I’ve thought the same thing myself. That phone call about Dan couldn’t have come at a worse time for me.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean.�
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  * * * * *

  “Baby, don’t do this. You know how much you mean to me.”

  “That’s precisely our problem, Jason. Or, rather, my problem.” Meredith zipped her suitcase shut and stood, leveling a hardened gaze at him. “This has been a long time coming. We both know it.”

  “This is crazy. We’ve been together for…” Jesus. Why the fuck couldn’t he remember how long he’d been with her? Six, no, seven years? Crap. He ran his fingers in his hair and expended a breath.

  The relationships and years had somehow been sucked together in a vacuum. He’d existed but not truly lived. And now. Now as he looked around at the meager home he’d paid off long ago he realized he’d missed the target on the white picket fence somehow.

  The wife and kids route had been his plan long ago but somehow he’d gotten off the path. No, not somehow. He knew exactly when that had happened because no one ever measured up to her. Only one woman was the vision for that specific happily ever after.

  And she’d gone and gotten hers with someone else.

  Damn.

  Meredith was a hell of a nice woman—a retired schoolteacher. Her husband had passed away from unexpected surgical complications and she’d been looking for a companion for her retirement years.

  Deep down he knew she was right. The relationship had been one of convenience rather than desire. Sure, the sex had been as good as could be expected for two people well into their golden years. Their personalities had complemented one another.

  They’d been comfortable but not truly happy.

  And wasn’t that all that really mattered when you were older than dirt and too stubborn to die?

  She approached and ran her hand on his chest, until it paused just above his heart. “You’re a great man, Jason Ashford. I wish you well.”

  “I’m sorry, Meredith.”

  “Go find whatever will make you happy, dear.” She smiled. “I’ll be at my sister’s. I do hope we can keep in touch.”

  “Of course.” Even as they exchanged the cursory parting he knew it wouldn’t happen. They never called when they left. All they did was vacate his life and strip away yet another piece of his soul, his heart.