Spark of Intent Read online

  He snorted, jumped up from his prone position, and headed toward the fridge. He tossed me a bottle of water before turning back around to face me. “You weren’t paying enough attention to have been able to hit me in the dark. You’re working hard, but you’re not to the point of getting the jump on us yet.”

  I rolled my eyes, chugging water as I studied him. Apparently, my early morning activities hadn’t gone unnoticed the way I thought they had.

  “Did my walls slip?” I had been keeping that focus as well as I could, and I hadn’t felt a crack, but I was new to holding my mental wall in place and using my powers.

  “No, Nix, your walls didn’t slip at all.” He began pulling ingredients from the cupboards and preparing breakfast. I shrugged, taking up the sprawling position he’d had at the table earlier. If he was willing to cook breakfast, I wasn’t going to object. The workout had left me low on energy—compounded by the lack of sleep, the stress, and the effort of hiding my actions—and I was happy to just sit back and relax a little. “I haven’t been sleeping. I heard you get up, heard you come back in. I figured you wanted some space, so I wasn’t going to interfere. You didn’t go outside any of the outer wards since none of the alarms went off. I figured you were safe enough at that distance.”

  “Do you know if any of the others have heard me?” I wanted to swear. I had thought this was my secret, and honestly had felt a little proud of myself for being able to slip past them to continue my training.

  “They haven’t said anything if they have. Killian’s not a great sleeper, so he’s probably heard you at least once. Theo sleeps like the dead but only if he’s not working. Ryder would probably have followed if he’d heard you—you know he doesn’t have much patience. Hiro could go either way. He’s probably just waiting for you to talk to him if you want to. Whatever the case, if they’ve heard you they’ve kept your secret locked up. I haven’t noticed it in their thoughts.”

  “Would you have noticed even if they were thinking about it?” The words slipped past my lips, and for a moment I was tempted to slap a hand over my mouth or apologize. Instead, I took another sip of my water and waited for him to answer. We’d all been putting this off but time was passing, and I wasn’t going to let this destroy our family. I wouldn’t allow the Council, my past, or whatever secrets people were harboring ruin our relationship. All our relationships.

  Damien stilled, his brisk whisking of the batter pausing briefly before he continued the smooth, constant motion. “What makes you think I wouldn’t have noticed?”

  I snorted, tossing the empty water bottle into the trash can. “You have been completely closed off. You keep shutting our group link down because you’re trying so hard to keep yourself silent. You’ve locked all of us out. Of course you wouldn’t notice.”

  Damien began to pour the batter onto the griddle, his movements slow and focused as he considered me. “I thought we could all use a little peace and quiet to process. I’m sure you don’t want me bouncing around in your head right now.”

  “Fuck that.” I pushed from the table and slapped my hands on my hips as I glared at him. “That’s an excuse and you know it. Shame on you for twisting this. You never go digging through my head, or the guys’ for that matter. You wouldn’t now, and I’m experienced enough to keep my thoughts mostly to myself. If I’d wanted shut out of the link—if any of us had—we would’ve said something. You made this decision unilaterally and for yourself.” My Phoenix and I were nearly vibrating as we stared him down. We had let this go on, and even my practices were pulling all of us apart. The Council and Michael were going to win if we didn’t get our act together and start talking like the family we were supposed to be.

  Damien flipped the pancakes, refusing to meet my gaze, and twirled the spatula between his fingers as he concentrated on the task at hand. “I need the silence right now. I’m sorry. I didn’t intend to pass the blame for it, or to close all of you out. For now, please, I just need to be alone in my head and not try to figure out how your thoughts or theirs interact with mine. Just for awhile longer, okay?”

  I brushed my fingers against his back as I passed him to retrieve the syrup from the cabinet. “A little while, D. You can’t keep us closed out forever. Even if you won’t open the link, we’re still going to have to talk about it. All of it.” I hesitated a moment then leaned up, stepping onto my tip-toes to brush a kiss across his cheek before heading back to the table. “For now, though, we can just focus on breakfast.”

  Two

  Theo

  I stared at the phone in my hand, shaking my head. The women in my family—and I included Rini in that group—were not letting up in the slightest. They wanted the chance to meet Nix. More than meet her. With the Gala approaching, they wanted to ensure that she had the appropriate apparel for the night. Apparently, they didn’t believe that my brothers and I were capable of helping her select suitable evening wear. I highly doubted she was going to enjoy a day of being swept away by boisterous and incredibly energetic women and dragged through store after store. It was my idea of a nightmare. I never shopped with my sister, mother, or any woman if I could help it.

  I shoved back from my computer, glaring at the open program. The Council was pushing hard for their tracking database. I had reservations about the project from the beginning, and now with doubt brewing over the Council, my reservations were growing. However, the creation of it was the key to the freedom my brothers and I were experiencing, and I wanted us to continue to have that freedom. I wasn’t quite sure how to balance my own ethical beliefs with my desire to do what was best for my family, and frankly it was giving me a headache.

  “Headache?” Nix’s voice had me turning my attention toward the doorway. She must have just gotten out of the shower because her hair was still wet, dripping water onto her shirt as she studied me. My Kraken growled his approval. He enjoyed seeing her wet, and he wanted to get her into his own habitat. He was extremely jealous that she had met all of my brothers’ alters and after all this time he was still a mystery to her.

  “Yeah. I’ll snag some ibuprofen when I grab coffee.” I slid my glasses from my nose, folding them and placing them under my computer screen so I would remember where I put them. I frequently lost things, and it was always a hassle getting them replaced. “Listen, Nix. I wanted to talk to you for a minute.” Her eyebrows rose, and I winced at my wording. “Nothing bad, I promise. I just got off the phone with my mother.”

  “Is this a conversation I should be seated for?” Her tone was wry, but I could see the concern in her eyes, and I chuckled to help ease the tension.

  “No, Nix. You don’t need to be seated unless you want to be.” I glanced distractedly around my room, waving a hand at my bed. I had made my bed that morning so I motioned her there, unsure where else to put her. It felt too formal to sit in the computer chair while she perched on my bed and too familiar to sit on the bed next to her. Standing didn’t seem right either, I felt as though I would tower over her. I shook my head at my own foolishness and perched on the edge of my bed, balancing myself rather than sitting back the way she was. She snorted, and from the small smile on her lips I figured she could guess my conundrum.

  “Now that we’re all comfortable, want to get on with my sentencing?” We both sobered for a moment at the reminder from her choice of words.

  “It’s really nothing too bad. You and Rini may have spoken about this a little, or maybe you’ve heard the guys talk about it. Part of being in the shifter world is honoring traditions set by the Council.” Nix scowled, but didn’t interrupt me. “Every year, the Council hosts a Gala. It’s sort of a coming out party for shifter females who are of age. The Gala celebrates any big accomplishments by shifters as well, however, most of the focus will be on matchmaking.”

  “You’re kidding.” Nix rolled her eyes. “There is seriously a coming out party? What is this, medieval England?” Her eyes widened as she caught my drift. “Oh no. Oh no, no, no. You have got to be kidding m
e. This is the Gala they want me to be a part of?”

  I winced, tugging at my hair. “Yes, Nix, there’s a chance that they expect you to present yourself at the Gala as a high ranking shifter female looking for a mate. They were very clear that they expect you to bear children and the sooner the better. While, of course, you wouldn’t need to be mated to do that, many shifters still prefer to maintain individual relationships rather than have multiple children without a solid family unit.”

  “So they expect me to marry? Immediately?” She was wringing her hands now, staring intently at the designs on my coverlet.

  “Not necessarily. They aren’t going to force you into marriage. They are simply giving that as an option. Some shifters never marry.”

  “If they don’t marry, are they still expected to have children?” Eyes darkened as her gaze met mine, Nix gave me a questioning look before she glanced away again. “I’m not—” She paused for a moment, drawing in a deep breath before wrapping her arms around her waist. “—I’m not exactly sure I want to have children.”

  “There are options, Nix.” I tried to keep my voice gentle, but she needed the facts. “Rare shifters like you are expected to bear children, yes. Whether they choose to do that in a committed relationship or not is generally a personal choice. The Council does like it when strong family lines combine, in the hopes that it will strengthen the child as well as offer more protection. Some shifters will go relationship to relationship, occasionally bearing a child. It goes against our nature, but mating is a choice. Shifters who are homosexual and rare will also choose to bear a child.”

  Her eyes widened as she studied me. “Seriously? There’s no issue here about having children when you aren’t married?” Her tone was awed, and I smiled slightly.

  “Remember, Nix, our world is different. It is far more of a stigma for a shifter to have a baby with someone of an extremely different rank, too close of a rank, or a human, than it is to have a baby out of wedlock. We are trying to expand our species, so bearing children is a high priority.”

  “I still don’t understand the rankings.” Nix’s words were a murmur.

  “If the rank is significantly different, say a high level mythological and a prey shifter, many old school shifters believe such a pairing would weaken the baby. You’ve already seen there is derision about part-bloods.” She nodded. “In regards to the ranks being too close, that’s mostly among rare mythologicals. For example, it would be frowned upon for you to mate with another exceedingly rare shifter. They want to ensure the survival of the line, and if you only produce Phoenix and not, say, Ceraptors, it would be considered a waste.”

  She cocked her head, beginning to understand a little. “That’s why they wouldn’t like the idea of me with Ryder. What about the rest of you?”

  I tried to adjust glasses I wasn’t wearing, a nervous tic that I couldn’t seem to completely lose. “It’s all politics, Nix. Some of it is based on genetics, but most of it is political. Our society is flawed, the same way human society is. Think of us the way Ahmya does.” Nix wrinkled her nose at the kitsune’s name, and my Kraken roared his agreement. He hadn’t liked the snob anyways. “Ahmya is a fire Kitsune. Her physical powers are strong, so she has a high rank. Kitsunes themselves aren’t incredibly rare, but their powers—like her father’s celestial skills—occasionally are. So they will have many children in the hopes that they will bear a celestial. They believe the stronger their mate, the more likely they will breed a kitsune with a cherished skill. So, Killian was of little use to her because, while his powers are strong, that’s rare. She would consider him a risk. Damien’s powers are strong and his family is part of the Council. Mating him would be political. Hiro’s family line is strong—although he himself is considered a weak kitsune per their cultural beliefs—and he is intimately tied to the Council. Ryder is a Ceraptor, definitely a top choice for her. It would bring her quite a bit of status to bear more Ceraptors, and if she got a kitsune, she would probably have a strong one.”

  “What about you?” I could see her eyes flickering with red and orange, her Phoenix active in her mind, and from the waves of heat rolling off her, she apparently disliked the direction of our conversation.

  “I was also of limited use.” My Kraken roared his outrage in my head, hating the ranking system that was in place for our people. “Krakens aren’t uncommon, and while I’m strong, it wasn’t much of an enticement for her. I would bring her little political power.”

  Nix pushed up from the bed, pacing my room. “It really is all politics.” I nodded, studying her agitated movements. Even now my Kraken could appreciate how fluidly she moved.

  “It’s politics and superstition. We do know that, most of the time, the strongest shifter of a breeding pair will be the shifter type of the offspring. There are anomalies—strong shifters who bear children who cannot shift, who bear children of the opposite type, or whose children are simply weak. Those are thought of more as…” I stumbled for a human analogy. “As birth defects, really.” I shrugged, unable to explain it more accurately or politely. “Superstitions range from group to group, but they’re all present. The only ones that hold steady through all shifters are the stronger your mate, the stronger your child.”

  “Okay, so it’s superstition and strength based. That doesn’t explain why they force everyone to bear children, even if they don’t want them. That’s no way to raise a child.”

  “That’s the part you don’t understand, Nix. Just because a shifter bears a child, doesn’t mean they’ll raise them. Bearing the children is the social duty, not raising them. Shifters who don’t want to raise the children aren’t forced to. They’re adopted into other shifter families or even the Council itself. Family groups will raise the children. Many times those groups are prey or predator shifters as a lot of mythologicals consider them nannies for mythological children.” I rolled my eyes, unable to prevent myself from hiding my disgust with such an antiquated, hierarchical system. Nix snorted, a grin overtaking her despite the worry I could see tightening the corners of her lips and eyes. I was glad she was like my brothers and me, frustrated by a system that should have ended decades ago, not obsessed with the power it could bring her.

  “So, I’ve got to go to this Gala and say, what?” Nix shook her head, her nose curling up in a way that made me want to kiss it. “Hey look, I’m of marriageable age and high rank, come bid on me?” I winced, but nodded.

  “Pretty much. There’s more to it—more details on behavior, dress, protocol—but I figure I’ve overwhelmed you enough for the moment. The reason I brought it up is that Rini…” I took a deep breath, rapidly adding in the next part a bit quieter, “and my mom and sister, want to take you to get a proper dress for the Gala.”

  Nix paled for a moment, her eyes locking on mine. “Don’t think I didn’t notice what you tried to sneak in there. Your mom and sister want to meet me? To take me shopping?” She was turning from white to a little green. Nervous, I reached for her, but she batted my hand away with a hiss. “I’ve only ever gone shopping with Kill. Never for a fancy dress. Why would your mom and sister want to go? Rini I could probably handle. But them?”

  “They want to get to know you. They know you’re important to me. I don’t hide things well from them.” Her expression softened and, thankfully, she took on a tinge of pink rather than green, the tension around her eyes relaxing a little as she smiled.

  “Let me talk to Rini, okay? Is she going to be presented too? I guess not, if she already has mates, right?”

  “Rini isn’t able to be presented.” I admitted this, allowing her to hear the full amount of scorn in my voice. “She’s predator. Galas are only for mythologicals, mostly the high ranking ones. She has a general idea of what happens, but she won’t fill you in on full protocol. We’ll do that. You’ll also have an advisor.” She perked up, sending me a pleading look and I chuckled. “No, Nix. You can make those eyes at me all you want. As hard as they are to resist, I can’t be your advisor
. It has to be an elder. Usually a family member. They’re the ones who accept, as you call them, bids on you. That way you don’t have every male in the place approaching you. They have to be approved first. I’m not sure yet who we’re going to have as your elder. Don’t worry, we’ll take care of you. Just because your elder approves someone, it doesn’t mean you have to mate with them. It only means they’re allowed to approach you.”

  Nix twisted her fingers, her teeth biting into her lip. I nearly groaned as her tongue flicked out to soothe the spot her teeth had dug into. “So, I can’t just, you know, say I’m not interested right now? Or that I’m with you guys?”

  My Kraken roared. He wanted her claim, and wanted it now, propriety be damned. “No, Nix. We can bid on you. It’s going to take time, though. Our pairings are not what the Council considers ideal, and I assume you want all of us.” She nodded, though she refused to meet my eyes. “We’ll handle it, Nix. For now, just know it’s going to be happening soon. Think it all over. Talk to us if you want to. We’re all here for you. We’ll schedule a time for you to go dress shopping and another for you to meet your elder.”

  The smile she sent me was strained but warm, and I couldn’t resist reaching forward to brush my lips over hers until her mouth softened and became hungry under mine. With a groan, I pulled away. I wanted to push her down onto the bed and press myself tightly to her, let that gorgeous mouth meld with mine until we both stopped thinking. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes bright as she started at my damp mouth. Apparently, her thoughts were along the same lines. I stood and offered her a hand to help her rise. “Come on, let’s go burn off this energy. We can train?” She nodded in agreement and followed me from the room, though I thought I saw her cast a longing look at the bed.

  Three