Uncle John’s Impossible Questions & Astounding Answers Read online

  Then Summerfield informed the crowd that the first missile delivery was already on its way—launched only a few moments earlier from the submarine U.S.S. Barbero. The missile’s nuclear warhead had been replaced with two mail containers filled with 3,000 letters, each printed with a special “First Official Rocket Mail” insignia. (The “official” designation was an important qualifier, because 23 years earlier, the postmaster of Greenwood Lake, New York, had launched an unauthorized rocket full of letters 2,000 feet across a frozen lake to the postmaster of Hewitt, New Jersey.)

  After flying more than 100 miles, Summerfield’s mail missile crashed reasonably close to its target. The letters scattered everywhere, but nobody was hurt, and Summerfield was quite pleased with the experiment. However, few others—including Eisenhower—were convinced that this was a viable way to deliver mail. In addition to the potential dangers involved, the number of missiles needed to transport America’s millions of letters every day would have been staggering. Result: U.S. Rocket Mail was declared dead on delivery.

  Back for Seconds

  Who is the only man to have served as President of the United States and as Chief Justice on the Supreme Court? Hint: He’s more famous in the Philippines than in the U.S.

  General Mayhem

  What was especially unusual about the Battle of Palmito Hill?

  Back for Seconds

  William Howard Taft. The Yale graduate much preferred law to politics, and his lifelong dream was to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court, which he eventually did in 1921, but only after spending four awkward years as president from 1909 to ’13.

  In the U.S., Taft is perhaps best known today for being too fat to get out of the White House bathtub, but in the Philippines, he is considered a national hero. While Taft was serving as a federal judge in 1900, President McKinley sent him to the U.S.-controlled island nation just after it gained independence from Spain. The portly politician helped set up a new government in the Philippines: He procured millions of dollars from the U.S. in order to jump-start the Filipino economy and to build roads and schools.

  General Mayhem

  The war was over. During the U.S. Civil War, generals often went weeks without orders from headquarters, forcing them to act on their own. Case in point: the Battle of Palmito Hill, fought on the banks of the Rio Grande near Brownsville, Texas. On May 11, 1865, breaking a local gentleman’s agreement that neither side would advance on the other without prior written warning, a Union commander led a raid on a Confederate camp, making off with some supplies and a few prisoners. A two-day battle ensued, resulting in a few dozen soldiers injured and dead. Unbeknownst to them, Confederate General Robert E. Lee had surrendered on April 9, 1865…more than a month earlier.

  Freedom Fighters

  What island nation’s revolution helped double the size of the United States?

  Mapped Out

  You may know that the word “America” comes from Italian explorer cartographer Amerigo Vespucci. But it was another cartographer who first wrote “America” on a map. Who was he?

  Freedom Fighters

  Haiti. At the beginning of the 19th century, Napoleon Bonaparte was building up his empire in Europe and extended his land-grabbing to North America. The French ruler laid claim to New Orleans and the rest of the Louisiana Territory. That gave Napoleon’s army control of all shipping into and out of the Mississippi River. In short, he staked a claim on nearly everything west of the Mississippi.

  Then, in 1803, slaves in Haiti revolted against the French colonists who occupied the island nation. Napoleon was forced to send in reinforcements, but his army met with more resistance than anticipated—along with yellow fever—which led to tens of thousands of French casualties.

  Seeing an opportunity, President Thomas Jefferson sent an envoy to France with an offer to buy the port of New Orleans for $10 million. Jefferson got a lot more than he bargained for: The besieged Bonaparte offered to sell 828,800 square miles of French-claimed land for $15 million, or about 3¢ per acre. The envoy took the deal, now known as the Louisiana Purchase, doubling the size of the U.S. with the stroke of a pen.

  Mapped Out

  Martin Waldseemüller. A few years after Vespucci led two Portuguese voyages to Brazil between 1499 and 1503, Waldseemüller, a German cartographer, published the first full map of the New World. He named the region “America” after Amerigo Vespucci.

  Foreign Dignitaries

  How many U.S. presidents were not born in the U.S.?

  Bounty Hunters

  Who sent the corpse of a “barking squirrel” to Thomas Jefferson?

  Foreign Dignitaries

  There have been seven presidents born outside the United States. Doesn’t the Constitution require that the president be a natural-born citizen? Yes, but only if he was born after the U.S. gained independence from England. The framers of the Constitution added a now-obsolete exception to that rule: A candidate could qualify if he were a citizen at the time the Constitution was adopted in 1787. Martin Van Buren, who served from 1837 to ’41, was the first president actually born an American citizen.

  Bounty Hunters

  Meriwether Lewis and William Clark. Two centuries ago, not long after the Louisiana Purchase doubled the size of the country, President Jefferson tasked Lewis, a U.S. Army Captain, with leading an expedition to the untamed West. Lewis selected his friend and former commander, Clark, to join him. Thier mission: Survey the landscape, find places to farm, make peace with the Indians, and catalog the West’s flora and fauna. Beginning in St. Louis, Missouri, in May 1804, the expedition of 33 people set off. Along the way, Lewis and Clark discovered and, in many cases, obtained samples of 178 previously unknown plants and 122 animals, including grizzly bears, California condors, cutthroat trout, magpies, coyotes, and “barking squirrels”—the burrowing rodents we now call prairie dogs.

  Terror by Land

  A woman named Alse Young was the first person to…what?

  Terror by Sea

  What war featured the first attempted submarine attack?

  Terror by Land

  Young was the first person to be executed for witchcraft in the American colonies. It happened on May 26, 1647, at Meeting House Square in Hartford, Connecticut.

  Five years earlier, witchcraft had become punishable by death in the colonies. Unlike in England, where witches were burned alive, in the New World the punishment was slightly more humane—they were merely hanged (or in one case, crushed to death by a boulder). The historical record is unclear as to what led to Young’s conviction as a witch, but it is known she left behind a husband and a baby girl who, 30 years later, was also labeled as a witch. By the time the death penalty for witchcraft was repealed in 1750, 32 people—most of them women—had been executed, including 20 in Salem, Massachusetts.

  Terror by Sea

  The American Revolution. A Connecticut man named David Bushnell built a hand-cranked underwater craft, which he called the Turtle, and on September 6, 1776, Sergeant Ezra Lee climbed into the world’s first submarine and piloted it through New York Harbor. His mission: attach a barrel of gunpowder to the side of a British ship, and then blow it up. Lee made it all the way to the ship but was unable to attach his payload. It floated away and exploded in the open water. Then Lee hightailed it back to shore.

  Bushnell built more subs during the war, but none of them were able to sink a British ship.

  Attack of the 151-Foot Woman

  Where was the Statue of Liberty originally going to live, and why didn’t she end up there?

  Attack of the 151-Foot Woman

  Egypt. French sculptor Frédéric Bartholdi’s lifelong dream was to create a monument that would rival the Colossus of Rhodes, a 107-foot-tall statue of the Greek god Helios that was destroyed by an earthquake in 226 B.C. Instead of a man, Bartholdi decided to create a robed woman holding a torch over her head—and he wanted her to stand at the northern entrance to the Suez Canal, which he’d visited on a trip to Egypt in 1855 at age 21.


  Bartholdi spent the next few years honing his craft and drawing up plans. All he had to do was convince Egypt’s government to help pay for the statue, which would also serve as a lighthouse. At first, prospects looked good: Egypt was enjoying a windfall from the revenue generated by ships passing through the canal. Plus, Egyptian cotton was suddenly in demand, since a blockade of the Southern states during the U.S. Civil War had halted America’s cotton exports. But after the war ended, U.S. cotton returned to the market and the price of cotton tanked…and with it, Egypt’s economy. Bartholdi was forced to look elsewhere for a place to put his statue. He chose the United States, a close ally of France. In 1871 he sailed to the U.S. to raise money and to look for a site. As his ship was traveling through New York Harbor, it sailed past Bedloe Island. The sculptor knew he had found his spot.

  Bartholdi spent the next 15 years working on the statue, which he called La Liberté éclairant le monde (“Liberty Enlightening the World”). It was completed in 1886, three decades after he got his big idea.

  Celebrity Endorsement

  Who wrote in a letter to Henry Ford, “While I still have got breath in my lungs I will tell you what a dandy car you make”?

  No Trivial Matter

  What bit of trivia was partly responsible for “The Star-Spangled Banner” becoming the official national anthem of the United States?

  Celebrity Endorsement

  That love letter to Henry Ford was penned by bank robber Clyde Barrow, of Bonnie and Clyde fame. Written in early 1934, here’s the letter in full:

  Dear Sir, While I still have got breath in my lungs I will tell you what a dandy car you make. I have drove Fords exclusively when I could get away with one. For sustained speed and freedom from trouble the Ford has got every other car skinned and even if my business hasn’t been strickly legal it don’t hurt enything to tell you what a fine car you got in the V8.

  Bonnie and Clyde’s business was indeed far from legal—their gang robbed several banks and killed dozens of people, including nine cops. A few weeks after sending the letter, the lovebirds were gunned down by lawmen on a desolate Louisiana road…while hiding out in their stolen 1934 beige Ford V-8.

  No Trivial Matter

  Believe it or not, we can thank cartoonist and fellow trivia hound Robert Ripley. In 1929 he published a cartoon with this caption: “Believe it or not, America has no national anthem.” Famed composer John Philip Sousa saw the cartoon and was surprised to find that it was true, so he decided to change that. After a brief search of possible songs, Sousa promoted Francis Scott Key’s “Star-Spangled Banner” as the official U.S. national anthem. His efforts paid off: Two years later, President Herbert Hoover signed it into law.

  WHERE IN THE WORLD?

  Ain’t no mountain high enough, ain’t no valley low enough…to keep us from giving you this geography quiz.

  Endless Summer

  What country has no schools?

  Old Towne

  Which U.S. town has had people living there the longest?

  Land Swap

  How many Rhode Islands could you fit inside Alaska?

  Endless Summer

  Vatican City. Called Città del Vaticano in Italian, it was once a part of Rome, but achieved its sovereign status in 1929, meaning that it’s not ruled by any other government. And even though it has “City” in its name, it’s technically a country.

  Covering only .16 of a square mile (less than two city blocks), Vatican City has a population of about 900 people, of which 60 percent are older than 60. Its official birthrate is zero, which makes sense because the headquarters of the Roman Catholic Church is primarily made up of priests, who are sworn to celibacy. No parents means no schools.

  Old Towne

  It’s not Jamestown, St. Augustine, or any other European settlement. The oldest town is Oraibi, Arizona. Hopi Indians settled there sometime before A.D. 1100, and they’re still there today.

  Land Swap

  If you packed them nice and tight, you could fit 429 Rhode Islands (at 1,545 square miles, the smallest U.S. state) into Alaska (the largest state, at 663,267 square miles).

  Footnote: Why is it called “Rhode Island” if it’s not an island? Because it reminded early explorers of the Greek island of Rhodes.

  High There

  The 15th step is 5,280 feet! No, it’s the 18th. Wait a second, it’s actually the 13th. Where is this confusing place?

  Drier Than a Martini, Even?

  What is the driest continent on Earth?

  High There

  They don’t call Denver the “Mile High City” for nothing. In 1890 architect Elijah E. Myers chose a site on which to build the State Capitol building that honors the Colorado city’s distinctive elevation. On the stairs leading to the building’s entrance, Myers placed a marker on the 15th step that says “Exactly One Mile Above Sea Level.” Pretty close, but Myers was off by a few feet. In 1969 the steps were surveyed again, and the marker was moved to the 18th step. In 2003 even more accurate measurements were taken. Now if you’re standing on the 13th step, you can be reasonably certain that you’re exactly one mile above sea level.

  By the way, Myers’s other goal was to pay homage to the U.S. Capitol building, so the Colorado counterpart is nearly identical, only smaller.

  Drier than a Martini, Even?

  Antarctica. But when you think of Antarctica, what comes to mind? Ice, and ice is made of water, right? So why is a continent covered in water considered the driest? Because it almost never rains or snows there. The ice is ancient, and it’s still there because Antarctica is so cold: Inland temperatures almost never rise above freezing. In fact, inland Antarctica gets only about two inches of precipitation per year; its coastal areas, only eight inches. It’s the driest continent on Earth, but it’s not the driest location. Where is that? (Go to the next page.)

  Much Drier than a Martini

  What is considered the driest location on Earth?

  Land Lubber

  Where on Earth would you have to go in order to get as far away from an ocean as possible? Once you got there, what’s the shortest distance you’d have to travel to get back to the ocean?

  Much Drier than a Martini

  Did you guess the Sahara Desert in Africa? Or maybe Death Valley in the U.S? They’re not nearly as arid as the Atacama Desert in northern Chile. This 600-mile-long plateau, located near the Pacific Ocean, averages less than .004 inches of precipitation annually, and some years it sees no rainfall at all. The hot desert days lead to some amazingly clear nights; there are rarely any clouds or light pollution from cities. Plus, it’s at a high elevation. That makes the Atacama Desert one of the best places on Earth to observe the night sky. As such, some of the world’s largest astronomical observatories are located there.

  Land Lubber

  The Dzoosotoyn Elisen Desert in Xinjiang, China. There’s a spot there unofficially known as Nocean (“No ocean”). Officially called the “Eurasian Pole of Inaccessibility,” it is the most landlocked place on Earth. How landlocked? It would take you three days to drive to the nearest coastline—the Bay of Bengal on the Indian Ocean, 1,645 miles to the south.

  The exact location of Nocean wasn’t discovered until 1986, when two British explorers—cousins Nicholas and Richard Crane—pinpointed it. If you want to go there yourself, set these coordinates into your GPS device: 46°16.8′N 86°40.2′E / 46.28°N 86.67°E / 46.28; 86.67…and start driving.

  How Ya Dune?

  Where is the largest area of sand dunes in the United States?

  Continental Division

  What’s the only country in which you can travel from the southern tip to the northeastern tip and end up on another continent (one that’s not part of the same land mass)?

  How Ya Dune?

  The logical answer might be in a desert state, such as New Mexico, or perhaps near the ocean—like the giant dunes on the central Oregon coast. But the answer is…Nebraska. More than a quarter of this land-locked state is m
ade up of grass-stabilized sand dunes that are as much as 330 feet high. They’re located in western Nebraska in an area called the Sand Hills that covers roughly 20,000 square miles. According to geologists, the dunes were once part of an ancient inland sea that dried up more than 100,000 years ago.

  Continental Division

  Egypt. Most of it sits on the African continent, but the northeastern part of the country—the Sinai Peninsula—is located in Asia. Turkey and Russia could be the answer, in that both countries sit partly in Asia and partly in Europe, but those two continents form a single land mass now commonly referred to as Eurasia. Egypt, however, is truly a country of two continents. This mostly Arab, mostly Muslim, nation has about 80 million people—95 percent of whom live along the Nile River. It boasts the largest population in the Middle East and the third-largest in Africa.