Wide Open Spaces Read online

  “Smart ass.” I grin, and her lips tilt up farther.

  “I can’t believe I forgot about Paul or that he’s still here.”

  “Still here, and still the only one in town who’s capable of getting Louie out of your place without hurting anyone. Now go on in and get something on. Aubrey will show you around.”

  “I’ll get dressed then wait out here.”

  “Shel,” I warn, and she pulls in a breath before grumbling, “Fine.”

  “I’ll get dressed, Dad, and help,” Steven interjects.

  “ ’Kay, bud.” I lift my chin, watching him head into the house.

  “I’m staying with Zach and Steven,” Hunter pipes in, when Shel’s head turns toward him. She starts to say something, but I cut her off before she even has a chance to open her mouth.

  “He’s good with me.”

  “But—”

  “He’s fine, Shel. Go on in.”

  Her eyes narrow, and I hear Aubrey giggle and watch her take Shel’s hand and give it a tug as Shel glares at me and I fight back a smile.

  “Nowhere near the bear,” Shel demands, pointing at Hunter.

  “I’m not crazy, Mom.” He rolls his eyes.

  “Well good,” she huffs, sending one last glare my way before turning on her bare feet and following Aubrey into the house.

  Chapter 4

  Shelby

  Looking out the window, I wonder if it’s too early to go to the liquor store and buy a bottle of vodka or tequila. “I can’t believe there was a bear in the house,” I whisper, and Aubrey, who is standing next to me looking out the window, giggles once more, making me glance at her and smile. I think I’ve repeated that same phrase twenty times since the guys—those guys including not only Paul and a young guy Stevens age but Zach, Hunter, and Steven—helped carry the unconscious bear out of the house on a large stretcher.

  At first, I wanted to run out of the house, yelling for them to get away from the bear, but when Hunter smiled at Zach and Steven said something to make them laugh, I held my ground. Max loves Hunter; I know he does. Hunter is probably the only person on the planet who Max loves completely, but he’s still Max. Uptight and demanding, even with his ten-year-old son. And Hunter takes that on acting not like himself, but like an adult most of the time when he’s around him.

  Stepping back from the window, I look around Zach’s living room, which is smaller than my own. One large couch is in the corner, and two chairs are seated in front of it, with a coffee table in-between and a shelf off to the side that looks like a ladder covered in odds and ends. I did my best not to look around when we ran over here this morning to see about using the phone, but now, I see there are a few pictures of the kids on the walls, but besides that, there’s no real personality in the space. I wonder absently if Tina lived here with them before, or if they all lived somewhere else. Spotting a stack of boxes in the corner, I walk over and pick up the one on top without thinking and turn to Aubrey.

  “My gramps used to love puzzles.” I smile, holding up the box and shaking it, listening to the puzzle pieces inside rattle together.

  “I used to put them together with him,” she says shyly, and I feel my face soften at her confession.

  “Really?” I ask, and she nods, tucking a piece of long dark hair behind her ear.

  “Yeah, um… before he moved away, Steven and I used to go to his house after school, if Dad was working, and he and I would put together puzzles.”

  Taking a seat on the couch, I look at the box in my hands then at Aubrey. I love that she got to experience that with Gramps. I love that he had her here after I left. “I love that you got to share that with him,” I say aloud.

  “I miss him,” she confides, and tears fill her beautiful eyes that look so much like her father’s. Without thinking, I set the box on the coffee table and move toward her, wrapping my arms around her in a tight hug.

  “What’s going on?” Zach asks, and we jump apart, each of us wiping our faces while we smile at each other.

  “Nothing. We were talking about starting a puzzle,” I reply, keeping my eyes on Aubrey when I speak. Her face goes soft, making something in my chest shift and fill with warmth.

  “And that brought you both to tears?” he prompts in disbelief. I chance a look at him, wondering how he seems to get more beautiful every time I see him. Judging by the stubble shadowing his jaw, he didn’t shave this morning, and his hair is growing out. A little is curling around his ears and hitting the top of his Henley, this one dark blue and matches the blue of his jeans. The belt around his waist with its large silver buckle and his badge are the only real contrast between the two.

  “We’re women. We don’t need a reason to cry,” I state.

  “Yeah, Dad. We’re women. We don’t need a reason to cry,” Aubrey repeats, making me turn to smile at her.

  “If you say so.” He shakes his head then looks from his daughter to me with a look in his eyes that make my insides flutter. “The boys are gonna ride with me and Paul to release the bear.”

  “Excuse me? You guys are doing what?” I sit up farther, balling my hands into fists in my lap.

  “We need to go release the bear out of town. The boys are gonna ride along.

  “I don—”

  “It’s safe, Shel,” he says quietly, cutting me off. I chew on the inside of my cheek in response. I wanted Hunter to have a different life than he had in the city, but having a bear break into your house then releasing said bear into the wild seems a little extreme. Especially when I was thinking more along the lines of him being able to fish and grow up enjoying the outdoors, instead of sitting in front of the TV or a computer all day. “The bear’s not Louie, and since he got into your house once, I don’t want him to think he has free rein to do it again.”

  “Who was it then?” I frown.

  “Don’t know his name.” He smiles, and I try to tell myself he’s not funny, but I still grin anyway.

  Letting out a long breath, I ask the question I don’t want to know the answer to, “How bad is the house?”

  “Not bad, considering there was a bear in it. There’s a few things broken, and most your food is gone but nothing major.”

  “I’ll help you clean up,” Aubrey chimes in, and that feeling in my chest expands even more.

  “That would be really sweet,” I say, moving my eyes to her.

  “I’m just gonna go get dressed.” She hops up then stops to give her dad a side hug before disappearing.

  “Are you sure it’s safe for the boys to go with you?”

  “I wouldn’t let them go if it wasn’t safe, baby,” he assures gently, and I nod. I look out the front window, where Steven and Hunter are standing huddled together. “How’s Hunter doing?” His gently spoken question is one I’m not exactly sure the answer to.

  After he left yesterday, I sat down with Hunter and spoke to him about the adoption, and a little about Zach and me, but I let him lead the conversation and ask the questions he wanted answers to. Now, I’m not so sure I did the right thing. I wanted so badly to tell him about the couple who adopted Samuel. About how the dad had the kindest eyes of anyone I’d ever met, and how the wife spoke softly and was always smiling. I wanted to tell him that they had been waiting for a baby for eight years and previously had an adoption fall through at the last minute, which almost destroyed them. To explain to him that giving up Samuel was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life, but also the most fulfilling, because I gave two wonderful people the chance to be parents. Something they were unable to do on their own.

  There was a time I didn’t see all the beauty in the situation that I do now. A time when I blamed Zach, when I shouldn’t have, because we both made the decision together, which is something I feel horrible about now. I know the adoption wasn’t easy for him either. I still remember finding him crying silently, and me walking away, too caught up in my own grief to even attempt to comfort him. It wasn’t fair of me to put the weight of my pain on him, but I st
ill did exactly that.

  “Shel.”

  My name being called brings me out of my thoughts, and I move my gaze back to him, shaking my head. “He seems okay,” I shrug.

  “Maybe he needed you to trust him a little.”

  “Maybe,” I agree with another shrug, then bite the inside of my cheek. “About what I said yesterday, that wasn’t fair, and I’m sorry.” In the heat of the moment, I let myself say some really not-so-nice things. I let my emotions get the better of me. I don’t know his story. I can assume and guess what happened when I left, but the truth is I really have no clue, and in all honesty, we were not together. I have no right to feel betrayed by him when I’m the one who insisted we break up.

  “We’ll talk.”

  “That’s not necessary,” I say immediately. I don’t want to talk about it. Not now, not ever.

  “It is.”

  “It’s not.” I begin to panic. I may be finding a way to get over the hurt I’ve been carrying around, but I don’t want to fall back into any kind of anything with Zach. Or at least, that’s what I’m telling myself.

  Taking a step toward where I’m seated on the couch. His eyes warm and his voice drops. “I like seeing you in my clothes.”

  “What?” I breathe, looking down at the shirt Aubrey gave me. I didn’t even think when I dressed. I just put it on and forgot about it, but seeing it now, I wonder how I didn’t notice it’s a man’s plaid shirt since it’s huge on me hitting me at mid thigh.

  “And my socks look cute on you,” he adds, referring to the large wool socks on my feet.

  “Oh, um… thanks,” I state like an idiot, peeking up at him. He grins, causing butterflies to dance in my stomach while we stare at each other.

  “Ready,” Aubrey calls, and I snap out of my trance. Standing from the couch suddenly, he doesn’t move or take a step back, so my body brushes his as I skirt past him. Rushing toward the front door, I meet Aubrey as she bounds down the stairs wearing a pair of baggy jeans and a long-sleeved red shirt that is three sizes to big for her small frame. Taking in her outfit, I realize the few times I’ve seen her she’s been wearing things that are far to big for her and do nothing to show off the beautiful girl she is.

  “Let’s go.” I smile, avoiding looking at Zach again as I swing open the door and step out.

  “See ya later, Dad,” I hear her say behind me, as I head down the stairs toward Hunter and Steven, who are standing near the bear that is still unconscious, but is now in a large round cage on wheels attached to the back of the truck.

  “You boys do not get anywhere near the bear once you let it loose. Do you understand me?” I point at each of them, and Hunter rolls his eyes while Steven looks confused, making me realize I’m not his parent and really have no right to tell him what to do.

  “Mom—”

  “Don’t ‘Mom’ me, Hunter. Nowhere near the bear.”

  “Fine,” he mumbles, tucking his hands into the pocket of his hoodie and dropping his eyes to the ground for a second.

  “Good.” With that, I send each of the boys one last look then turn to walk away and run straight into a large body.

  “Ya not gonna even say hi to me, Shelby Lynn?”

  Lifting my head up, and up, my eyes connect with Paul’s, and my face softens as I take in his shock of rusty hair and the beard covering his face. Over time, Paul became just one more memory for me, but when I was growing up, he was a constant in my life as my dad’s best friend. After my parents passed away, he would come visit me often and check in to make sure I had whatever I needed and that I was doing okay. When I told him I was pregnant, he gave me a fatherly lecture then supported my decision of adoption, even though a lot of other people at the time were against it. After Samuel’s birth, he was one of the first people I told about my plans to leave, and he tried to talk me out of going, but supported me when I told him I just couldn’t stay.

  “Hey, Paul.” I smile, tilting my head to the side. “You’re still here,” I say softly, and his eyes scan over me from head to toe, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

  “I am, and you’re back,” he replies, just as soft. “Your gramps would be happy you’re back where you belong.” Swallowing hard, I nod, and his arms wrap around me in a tight hug that lifts me off my feet. “I’m glad you’re back.”

  “Me too,” I admit, hugging him just as tight.

  Settling me on my feet, he leans back and looks me over once more. “You’ll have to make time to come to my house for dinner. I’m sure Joe would like to see you.”

  “Joe?” I ask, and his face softens further.

  “Joanne’s my wife… A lot has changed since you’ve been gone.”

  “You got married?” I’m not able to hide the disbelief in my tone. Paul was always single; even my dad said he would never get married, never settle down.

  “Married and got a boy and three girls.” He grins, causing the beard covering his face to shift. “Den, come over here, boy,” he calls, and the young kid I saw out the window earlier saunters over, wearing dark jeans, a thin vest open wide, showing off a tight black Henley that accentuates his muscular teenage boy body. “Den, this is Shelby, Hunter’s mom.” He pats his son’s shoulder and I smile, thinking that even for probably fourteen or fifteen, he’s handsome with a strong jaw, full lips, dark hair, and brown eyes.

  “Nice to meet you.” He smiles, showing off a dimple, and I smile back then look over at Aubrey, but find her eyes to the ground and her cheeks pink.

  Hmm.

  “So you met my son?” I question, and Paul nods.

  “I did. You got a good boy,” he compliments.

  “I really do,” I agree glancing at Hunter, watching him smile and his eyes light in a way I don’t see often enough, but want to see much more.

  “And you’re back with Zach. Funny world we live in, don’t ya think?” My head swings back towards him and my heart rate kicks into overdrive.

  “N-no, I’m not with Zach.” He scans my face and his smile turns into a grin as his eyes move over my head for a moment before coming back to me once more dancing.

  “Whatever, I’m just glad you’re back.”

  Letting out a long breath, I repeat, “Me too.” Silently wondering why my stomach feels the way it does.

  “Zach has my cell.” He steps back, pulling a set of keys from his pocket. “Get it from him and we’ll make plans for you all to come over to dinner one night. I live in a nuthouse surrounded by mostly women, but it’s clean and smells good. Plus, they’re always cooking something that nine times out of ten taste good, so I can’t complain too much.”

  I smile at that. My dad would love knowing his friend is married with girls. He would definitely think it’s some kind of karma for the way Paul used to get around.

  “I will definitely call and set something up,” I agree, giving him one more smile.

  “We better go before the bear wakes. We’ll catch up soon.” He lifts his chin to someone behind me then turns away, taking a step back I watch him and the boys start to load into the truck then turn to look for Aubrey coming face to face with Zach.

  “We’ll be back soon,” His eyes drop the length of my body and his voice softens. “Get inside, baby, and take care of my girl.”

  “Don’t call me baby.” I narrow my eyes, watching his lips twitch before he pulls his gaze from mine. “Stay with Shel, gorgeous.”

  “I will, Dad,” Aubrey agrees, as I feel his fingers slide over mine briefly before he turns and starts to walk away.

  “Make sure the boys stay away from that Bear Zach Watters.” I call out to his back as he heads for the truck.

  “Will do baby.” He mutters back without looking at me and I huff in annoyance hearing Aubrey giggle behind me.

  Turning I smile at Aubrey wrap my arm around her shoulders and lead her towards my house. As soon as we reach the steps and I know no one can hear us, I dip my face to her ear, and whisper, “Den is super cute.”

  “I know,” she w
hispers back, and with that, I open the door, smiling at my feet, then get to work cleaning up the mess the bear left behind.

  “Mom!” Hunter yells into the house, before the front door closes loudly and the sound of his feet hit the hardwood in the hall.

  “In the kitchen!” I yell back, tying up the garbage bag Aubrey and I filled with smashed dishes from the table and opened boxes of food from the cupboards. Zach was right; the house wasn’t too bad considering there was a bear in it. Most of the damage was in the kitchen, where the bear decided to have the breakfast we left on the table before going through the cupboards, where it had obviously smelled food.

  “Aubrey, your dad said to tell you him and Steven are home,” Hunter says, coming into the kitchen.

  “Okay,” she replies, then looks at me. “Do you want me to help you with anything else before I go?”

  “No, honey.” I smile, handing over the garbage bag to Hunter so he can take it out the back door to dumpster at the back of the house. “Thanks for helping me with everything.”

  “It was fun.” She smiles and makes her way over to the sink to wash her hands.

  “Well, next time, I say we do something a little more fun when we hang out, like make cookies or bake a cake.”

  “Really?” she breathes, as her hands pause under the water and her eyes lock on mine.

  “Absolutely,” I reply softly, studying her. Wondering why she seems so surprised. “I really enjoyed spending time with you today.”

  “Me too.” She takes her eyes from mine then turns off the sink and ducks her head as she moves past me toward the front door. I don’t know what’s wrong, but something about her reaction isn’t sitting well with me.

  “Aubrey,” I call gently, while I watch as she shoves her feet into her sneakers that she had taken off before we mopped.

  “Yeah?” she answers to the floor. I feel myself frown, not sure what to do, because it seems like she’s trying to get away from me as quickly as possible.

  “Thanks again, honey.”

  “Sure.” She stands, opens the door, and steps out onto the porch without looking at me. When she’s down the front steps, I bite my lip then call her name again. Her eyes come to me, and the pain I see there makes my stomach hurt.