Sharing Hell (Hell Virus Book 3) Read online

  His lips twitched. “I’m sure the teacher will excuse you just this once.”

  When we stood together, just a couple of feet separating us, I took another step and pressed my mouth to his lightly before stepping back. “I don’t know if you have plans tonight, but if you’d like to have a sleepover, you know where my room is.” I issued the invitation in a casual way, impressed by how confident and carefree I sounded. It was definitely nothing like the old Natalie, who would have been obsessing about how to phrase it and probably would’ve been so caught up in imagining his various reactions that I never could have issued the invitation to start with.

  I had an air of confidence as I left him, but inside, I was a mass of uncertainty. Would he show up? It seemed unlikely that he wouldn’t, especially after the last thirty minutes or so, but I couldn’t completely shed all my old insecurities overnight—or even in eighteen months.

  ***

  Chris came to my room, but I hadn’t really expected him not to. We had spent the night learning each other’s bodies, which meant my sleep had suffered. I still forced myself out of bed when he woke up, deciding to go for a run before my shower after he had slipped out. I think he wanted to give me some privacy, or perhaps he was showing respect by not making it blatantly obvious that we were sleeping together.

  I wasn’t embarrassed by the fact that we were lovers now, but it was definitely quick. I’d been here two days, going on three, and had already taken my first lover. That wasn’t like me either, but I kind of liked this new Natalie, who was willing to seize what she wanted and realize the value of living in the moment, because everything could be gone in an instant.

  There was an outdoor track aboveground, so I made my way there. My muscles were stiff and sore from a combination of the class I’d taken yesterday, along with a different kind of workout Chris had provided yesterday afternoon and most of last night off and on. It felt like a good idea to run and loosen my muscles. I was stretching when I heard the sound of shoes approaching. I turned to look, feeling a moment of disappointment as I recognized Alyssa. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see her, but I’d hoped it was Chris, or perhaps Finn or Avi. Maybe even the handsome Chinese guy I’d met yesterday, though he clearly had a problem with me for whatever reason.

  I smiled as she stopped beside me, beginning her own stretching routine. Before I could think better of it, the words flew from my mouth as I asked, “Do you ever have trouble walking?”

  She blinked for a moment, looking confused, at least until I blushed. Then Alyssa laughed. “Not usually, at least not anymore. My body’s well adapted to three lovers. That is what you meant, isn’t it?”

  I nodded. “I’m so sorry to be that blunt. I usually have a lot more tact, and a fairly good-sized vocabulary. I definitely could have found a more delicate way to ask that question.”

  With a shrug, she broke into a light run, which forced me to move if I wanted to hear her answer.

  “It’s no big deal. I like to keep things private, of course, but not wanting to talk about it would be like I was embarrassed and didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that I have an unconventional relationship with Han, Shane, and Jamar.”

  “How do you balance all three?”

  She cocked a brow. “Well, we spend time together separately, and sometimes we’re all together. I’m sure you can figure out what I mean by that without me getting too deeply into detail.”

  I blushed again. “Of course, but I actually meant how do you balance the emotional needs of all of them? So far, I’ve only found one man, but I’m sure there will be more. I don’t know how to do all the messy emotional stuff.”

  Alyssa ran for a moment before she answered me, clearly composing her thoughts. “I can’t give you specific advice, because it changes daily. All I can tell you is you have to address those issues as they come up, and even if it’s something painful that you don’t want to deal with or face, you guys need to discuss it. Be sensitive to how they’re feeling, and make sure you’re giving each one of them your full attention, even if you’re with all of them at the same time.”

  “How do I do that?”

  “It sounds harder than it really is. After a while, you just start to be aware of all three of them—or more, or less—and their needs are pretty obvious to me. We’re all pretty settled in our relationship, and we have our routine down, but there are still moments when someone feels jealous, or neglected, and I just try to make sure he has a little more attention. The important thing is to be flexible and address everyone’s needs in such a relationship, rather than getting locked into what you think you should do. If you’re worried about what you should do, you’ll never be successful with a multiple-partner relationship anyway. Because this is pretty much completely outside the bounds of what people think we should do, isn’t it?”

  I shrugged. “That’s true of the old world, but things seem to be rapidly changing in this new environment. There just aren’t very many women, and the men want companionship.”

  Alyssa nodded. “That’s exactly right. You just have to make sure that they’re all getting what they need, and that you’re getting what you need too. Trust can be a fragile thing, and easily shattered. It takes a long time to rebuild, so it’s better if you don’t let it get to that point. That’s why I say tackle your problems head-on as they arise.”

  “You sound like you’re speaking from experience.”

  Alyssa nodded as she started running faster, forcing me to increase my pace. She didn’t even sound winded, though I was already starting to feel a bit of strain in my chest. “Was it a jealousy thing?”

  She shrugged. “There’ve definitely been times we’ve dealt with jealousy, but the incident I’m referring to involved another woman.”

  “One of them cheated on you?”

  She shook her head, making hair fly around her face. “Not exactly. For a brief time, we rescued a woman named Kassandra, and she was part of our group. She hated me and plotted with someone else to kill me so she could have Shane. She was good at manipulating, and she manipulated Shane and Jamar into believing I had attacked her. They took her side, and though they were contrite when they learned the truth, it took a while to heal the breach.”

  I winced on her behalf.

  “I want to make sure we never have anything like that happen to us again, so whenever any of us have a problem, we discuss it. Sometimes, it’s just me and one of my guys talking about it, and sometimes it’s a group discussion. That’s another reality for you. When you enter a relationship with more than one man, they’re entering a relationship with each other too. That doesn’t mean it’s a sexual thing, but they have to care about each other and truly be willing to share and work out any problems that arise. If not, you’re going to have nothing but conflict, and that’s something I personally don’t want to waste my time with when we never know how much time we have anymore.”

  “You seem to have it all figured out,” I said with admiration. “How old are you again? A hundred and five?”

  She giggled, sounding young for the first time since we’d started speaking. “Technically, I’m twenty, but I think I have an old soul. I didn’t used to be that way before HLV. I was self-centered and thoughtless, just like most other girls my age. But things changed when I lost everyone and then found the three men who made me whole again. Drama doesn’t appeal to me, and it doesn’t to them either, so we make it work. If you can find men with whom you’re compatible, I think you’ll be happy too.”

  I clung to her words with hope as we finished our run, the conversation first moving to more casual topics before dying out entirely as I lost the ability to speak while running. She was a lot shorter and smaller than me, but she was definitely running rings around me as we traversed the track. Finally, I gave up several laps before her and went to grab a shower. Talking with her made me feel better about the whole thing, and I felt like I had a new handle on the situation as I remained open to the possibility of introducing more than
Chris into my life in an intimate fashion.

  Chapter Four

  Without any scheduled duties until the next morning, I found myself seeking out Finn in the infirmary again. Ostensibly I went there to offer my services, should he need an assistant, but I knew why I was really going there. I wanted to follow up on the kiss we’d shared, to see where it would lead.

  I found him hanging out behind the intake desk, and I walked around behind the desk to lean against it as I stood near him. “How are your patients?”

  “They’ve all been discharged and ordered to rest in their quarters.”

  “Do you have any new patients? I thought you might need a hand?”

  He shook his head. “It’s been dead this afternoon.”

  I frowned, looking for an excuse to stay that wasn’t so blatant as to say, “Hey, I want to jump on you.” Tilting my head, I remembered him stacking linens yesterday. “Do you need help with stocking supplies or laundry or…anything?”

  Once again, he shook his head. I let out a sigh of frustration. “You’re not making this very easy, Finn.”

  He frowned. “Making what easy?”

  Instead of blatantly answering, I faked a cough. “Maybe you should check me out? I need to make sure I’m in top physical form for my run tomorrow.”

  Apparently, he finally realized why I was there, because his expression changed, and his eyes warmed. “Maybe I should.” He stood up from the desk, bringing out a sign that read “Ring the bell.” He placed it beside an old-fashioned bell with a button atop before walking around the chair and taking my hand. He led me down the hallway to the first exam room, and when the door closed behind us, I heard the discreet snick of the lock clicking into place. There were no windows in the door or along the wall, so we had the place to ourselves. “Will you hear the bell?”

  “If not, I’m sure I’ll hear someone yelling for me.” He eyed me up and down. “So what seems to be the problem?”

  With exaggerated slowness, I sank to my knees. “I think my reflexes aren’t as good as they used to be. It takes a while to bend down.”

  My gaze was on the bulge forming in the front of his khakis, which was now roughly eyelevel in my current position. I looked up at him through my lashes. “You think maintaining this position for a while will help?”

  “It couldn’t hurt to retrain your muscles.” He sounded strained, and even more so when I reached for the button on his slacks. As I opened it before easing down the zipper, he cleared his throat.

  “You have any other problems?”

  “My mouth is dry. Do you have some idea of how I might moisten it?”

  Finn just groaned in response, clearly unable to continue our banter as I eased down his pants and underwear, before wrapping my hand around his generous shaft. I guided it to my mouth, licking my lips before sliding them slowly around his girth. I moved in incremental motions, drawing out the time it took to fully encompass his shaft between my lips.

  His hand moved to my head, gripping a handful of my hair, though not in a hard way. He seemed to simply be anchoring himself, a supposition confirmed by the way he gripped the edge of the counter beside him with his other hand.

  I worked my mouth up and down the length of him, sucking slowly before pausing to lick. Finn’s face grew bright red, and he was clearly saying something, though I couldn’t make it out through his brogue in his excitement. I think he was whispering endearments, or perhaps encouragement. Either way, he was clearly enjoying my ministrations, and that pleased me as well.

  I took him in as deeply as I could, swallowing when he reached the back of my throat. He started to tremble as his cock twitched before he came. He convulsed in my mouth as I discreetly swallowed his release, carefully draining him, but in a gentle fashion, since I knew he must be particularly sensitive at the moment.

  When I finally pulled away, he was still gasping, and he looked utterly wrecked, but in a good way. I remained kneeling at his feet, grinning up at him. “That seemed to be the cure I needed.”

  “Not even close,” he said with a growl as he bent down to pick me up. I had started out in control, but a switch had clearly flipped in Finn, adding to his sense of urgency rather than assuaging it slightly. It was a strange reaction, but I certainly didn’t mind his continued arousal.

  I had come dressed for this plan, so when he flipped up the sundress to my waist, he discovered I had shunned underwear. There was a possessive growl in his voice as he uttered something that I couldn’t quite make out before laying me on the table and spreading my legs. His mouth moved between them, reciprocating the pleasure I’d given him until I was thrusting and writing against him as I called out his name. My climax crested, and as I started to go over the edge, Finn moved my hips to the edge of the bed and surged inside me, clearly having recharged from his own climax.

  Our coupling was less frantic now that we had both come, and we moved slowly together. Our gazes locked, and I couldn’t look away as I met each thrust of his hips with my own. My walls clung to him as though he’d been made for me, and it felt perfect with Finn. It had felt perfect with Chris too, but in a different way. I was starting to get an inkling of what Alyssa had meant by everyone being different and having their own needs.

  We clasped hands as we moved together, the first twitch of his cock inside me triggering my release. Somehow, I managed to ask him to pull out, and it seemed to cost him a great deal of strength to do so, but he accommodated me. There was no explanation as for why I’d made the request. He was smart enough to figure it out for himself, especially with medical training. I was looking forward to the point where my birth control would be reliable enough that I wouldn’t have to make such a request, and I could feel my lovers completely inside me.

  Afterward, we cleaned up together in near-silence, and once I was dressed, he pulled me into his arms to give me another soul-searing kiss. It was as passionate as it had been before, but with a new depth to it.

  Things had definitely shifted between us that afternoon, and while I was still slightly anxious about being able to make a multiple-partner relationship work, I was feeling better about the whole thing after speaking with Alyssa, and also after feeling vivid and intense connections with both Chris and Finn, though they were different in some ways. That was appropriate, because the men were different too, and to a certain extent, perhaps even I was a little different with each of them. As long as we remained flexible and adapted easily, I was pretty sure we could make this whole thing work.

  Chapter Five

  I went on my first run the next morning. I trooped out with the others while sticking close to Avi. There were twelve of us, and we rode together in a convoy of three trucks. I was in the same truck as Avi, but I hadn’t managed to sit beside him. He was the driver, and four of us were crammed into the front bench seat. Somehow, I had ended up between the two men who had set my nerves on edge the first night of my arrival.

  Terrence was on my left, and I soon learned the name of the big black guy who had intimidated me before. He was Crowe, and he sat on my right. Neither one of them did anything that should’ve triggered my instincts, but they were screaming at me to get away from them as soon as possible.

  It was a strange experience to have my fight-or-flight response kick into gear while just sitting between two men in a truck. I wasn’t usually prone to bouts of intuition, so I tried to push aside the concern. They had done nothing to me, and they didn’t pose any kind of threat. I decided I was simply reacting to the adrenaline rush of my first mission with this team and letting it cloud my judgment.

  We drove to the outskirts of Helena, and Avi parked the truck at a truck stop. The other two trucks parked behind us as we opened the doors and climbed out. I grimaced when Crowe insisted on lifting me out of the truck and setting me on my feet, but he didn’t touch me inappropriately, so I shrugged it off.

  Once we were all gathered in the parking lot, Avi spoke to the group. “You know the routine. Find a partner and get to it.
Don’t forget to maintain radio contact, Crowe.” He directed the admonishment to the man standing a shade too close to me.

  Crowe took it with apparent good-natured humor. “Like I said, I forgot to change the batteries. It’s good now, Avi.”

  Looking satisfied, Avi nodded. His gaze moved to me. “You’re with me today, Natalie.”

  A wave of relief swept through me as I stepped over to join him. He was confident and calm, and I felt safer in his presence.

  The group broke apart into twos, and I stayed near Avi as we approached the hotel lining the perimeter of the truck stop. “What are we looking for? I mean, anything in particular, or just anything useful?”

  “Anything of use. We haven’t cleared this area yet, so I don’t know what we’ll find in the rooms. Prepare yourself.” As he said those words, he reached into his pocket and held out a bottle of Vicks. “Want some, just in case?”

  I shook my head, deciding against smearing some under my nose to help block the scents we might encounter. I might change my mind if we came upon a gruesome scene filled with nasty smells, but the vapor rub always left my skin raw and chapped. “You don’t use gas masks?”

  He shrugged. “We do sometimes, but I doubt we’ll need them here. There’s a stash in the truck, should that be an incorrect guess, but I hope we won’t need them. They restrict our vision and make it hard to breathe.”

  I nodded, having worn one a few times on various outings when I was with Camp Utopia. I didn’t like them, but appreciated that they were available should the need arise.

  The first three rooms we searched were all empty, but yielded useful items like personal toiletries. The fourth room was a different story, and there were two almost-skeletons on the bed. The way they seemedto be wrapped around each other suggested they had been close in life and clung to each other even while dying. Something about their pose stayed with me as we skipped that room and moved on to the next.