Forewords Book of the Year, Kirkus Indie Best Lister, IBA and USA Book News finalist. It's the age-old tale: Boy meets girl. Boy stalks girl. Girl already has a stalker. Boy becomes her stalker-stalker. We've seen it all before, many times, but this time it's different. If only slightly. Gomez is eternally bewildered by the ease with which others navigate the world. He’s never had much luck with women, or jobs, or anything really. Even gravity seems to pull on him a little harder than it does on others. But when he enters a medical trial and a super sexy research assistant falls for him, he thinks his luck has changed – even if that assistant has trouble expressing herself in terms outside the realm of science. But when one of the trial participants turns up dead and another goes missing, Gomez begins to fear for his life. No longer sure whom he can trust and which of his experiences are actually real and which merely drug induced delusions, he decides to go underground and work out a devious plan. "Extremely witty and clever writing that contains keen insights into human nature." --California Chronicle "Challenges the way we think about, and interact with, the world around us." --Kirkus Discoveries "The antics in this book will leave the reader laughing. Graham Parke is a genius." --Readers Favorite "A quick and unputdownable read that flies in the face of reason, and smashes against the wall of detective novels. It's a Coens Brothers' film formatted in book form." --Book Review "A very funny book; a veritable page turner of nonstop laughs. Buy a copy and find out for yourself!" --Reader Views ReviewMuch of the richness of this book lies in its jocular conversational bantering and some extremely witty and clever writing. --Book Pleasures, March 4, 2010 Extremely witty and clever writing that contains keen insights into human nature. --California Chronicle The antics in this book will leave the reader laughing. Graham Parke is a genius. --Readers Favorite A quick and unputdownable read that flies in the face of reason, and smashes against the wall of detective novels. It's a Coens Brothers' film formatted in book form. --Book Review A very funny book; a veritable page turner of nonstop laughs. Buy a copy and find out for yourself! --Reader Views From the Inside FlapRead an article about a group of mathematicians who developed a financial model to accurately compare apples and oranges. I was stunned. Never thought I'd see the day. Preliminary indications are that the model allows any two kinds of fruit to be compared, although guava still causes minor rounding errors. Further testing is ongoing. -- Gomez Porter, blogspace entry Chapter 1. I haven't been sleeping well. There's this strange sound coming from the apartment below at approximately 4:22 a.m. It's a sound I've never heard before and I can only describe it in terms of other sounds that might combine to be mostly identical: it sounds like my neighbor is stir-frying hamsters in a large enameled wok. And let me tell you, that kind of sound messes with your ability to drift away peacefully. Wide awake, I decide to get up to do some writing. They asked me to keep a blog. They told me to be meticulous and exact in reporting my experiences. Leave nothing out, they said, no matter how mundane or unimportant it seems. You see, I'm in this drug trail and I have no idea what kind of drug I'm on. It could be a nervous system depressant, an anti-psychotic, or just a simple pain reliever. I really have no way of knowing what kind of experiences would constitute effects or side effects. So, to be safe on the safe side, I create a new blog entry whenever something strange happens, then I upload it through the clinic's online portal. Let them sift through the mess to decide what's relevant and what's not. What's out of the ordinary and what's to be expected. Just write down everything, they said. So, here goes... Views: 64
Love knows no limits… Briony considers herself easy to please. All she wants is a Dominant who’s wickedly creative and completely devoted to conquering her—and only her—with joy. She has everything she wants until her Dom takes on another girl. Bri delights in fantasy role play, inventive toys and bondage at Hell Mary’s BDSM club, but she doesn’t do poly. Now she’s on the hunt for a new play partner who’ll give her exactly what she needs. A little flirtation with Hell Mary’s Dungeon Monitor is just the thing to ease her back into circulation—except the hardass wrapped in khaki treats her like she needs protection. Behind his imperturbable DM mask, Chris has eyes only for Bri. It’s his job to make sure things don’t get out of control at the club. Despite her bravado, Bri’s broken heart is like a target painted on her back. She needs to learn some things on her own, but when a private scene goes too far, he can’t wait any longer to step in—and show her she doesn’t need fancy trappings. His body is more than enough. Warning: this title features kink and imaginative sex in a variety of forms—scalding hot, kinda lukewarm, and juuuust right. Reminders to breathe are clearly marked. Ignore them at your peril. Views: 64
When a little boy chooses to play with the Velveteen Rabbit instead of his more expensive toys, the doll learns what it means to be truly Real. Young and old alike will enjoy this collection of time-honored tales, featuring the stuffed bunny and including other favorites such as "Pinocchio," "Thumbelina," "Little Red Riding Hood," and "The Ugly Duckling." Views: 64
In The Beginning of Sorrows we saw the events leading up to the destruction of America. Now in the aftermath, the epic end–times struggle between good and evil continues. Widespread anarchy and chaos threaten Christians as they seek a hiding place for the resistance. The power of prayer is an invisible resistance to Count Tor vonEisenhalt's evil, so now he is more determined than ever to root out and annihilate every Christian on the planet. Fallen Stars, Bitter Waters is a rousing novel that will open new ways of thinking abut what the end–times will be like and what they will mean to believers.Note from Publisher: Due to the overall sales of the first two books in the Omega Trilogy, we regret to report that the third book, Seven Golden Vials, will not be releasing. However, we are happy to announce a new series from Gilbert Morris, debuting in the spring of 2003, tentatively titled "The Creoles." Look for the first book to hit bookshelves early next year. Views: 64
EDITORIAL REVIEW:
The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public.
Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. 'Cept there's no whining. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they're vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, imprisoned them in a bronze statue.
Abby wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she's really busy with other stuff, like breaking in a pair of red vinyl thigh-high Skankenstein® platform boots and wrangling her Ph.D.-candidate boyfriend, Steve (the love monkey). And then there's that vampire cat Chet, who's getting bigger and smarter—and thirstier—by the minute. Abby thought she and Steve could handle the kitty cat on their own, *mais non* . . .
Before you can say "OMG! WTF?" Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby, Steve, the frozen-turkey-bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, Abby's gay Goth friend Jared, and SF's finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. And that's when the fun really begins. Views: 64
