The Rose and the Ring Read online

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'Smother the old witch!' } Hedzoff, the ardent Smith, and

  'Pitch her into the river!'} the faithful Jones.

  But Gruffanuff flung her arms round the Archbishop's neck, and

  bellowed out, 'Justice, justice, my Lord Chancellor!' so

  loudly, that her piercing shrieks caused everybody to pause.

  As for Rosalba, she was borne away lifeless by her ladies; and

  you may imagine the look of agony which Giglio cast towards

  that lovely being, as his hope, his joy, his darling, his all

  in all, was thus removed, and in her place the horrid old

  Gruffanuff rushed up to his side, and once more shrieked out,

  'Justice, justice!'

  'Won't you take that sum of money which Glumboso hid?' says

  Giglio; 'two hundred and eighteen thousand millions, or

  thereabouts. It's a handsome sum.'

  'I will have that and you too!' says Gruffanuff.

  'Let us throw the crown jewels into the bargain,' gasps out

  Giglio.

  'I will wear them by my Giglio's side!' says Gruffanuff.

  'Will half, three-quarters, five-sixths, nineteen-twentieths,

  of my kingdom do, Countess?' asks the trembling monarch.

  'What were all Europe to me without YOU, my Giglio?' cries

  Gruff, kissing his hand.

  'I won't, I can't, I shan't,--I'll resign the crown first,'

  shouts Giglio, tearing away his hand; but Gruff clung to it.

  'I have a competency, my love,' she says, 'and with thee and a

  cottage thy Barbara will be happy.'

  Giglio was half mad with rage by this time. 'I will not marry

  her,' says he. 'Oh, Fairy, Fairy, give me counsel?' And as he

  spoke he looked wildly round at the severe face of the Fairy

  Blackstick.

  "'Why is Fairy Blackstick always advising me, and warning me to

  keep my word? Does she suppose that I am not a man of

  honour?"' said the Fairy, quoting Giglio's own haughty words.

  He quailed under the brightness of her eyes; he felt that there

  was no escape for him from that awful inquisition.

  'Well, Archbishop,' said he in a dreadful voice, that made his

  Grace start, 'since this Fairy has led me to the height of

  happiness but to dash me down into the depths of despair, since

  I am to lose Rosalba, let me at least keep my honour. Get up,

  Countess, and let us be married; I can keep my word, but I can

  die afterwards.'

  'Oh, dear Giglio,' cries Gruffanuff, skipping up, 'I knew, I

  knew I could trust thee--I knew that my Prince was the soul of

  honour. Jump into your carriages, ladies and gentlemen, and

  let us go to church at once; and as for dying, dear Giglio, no,

  no:--thou wilt forget that insignificant little chambermaid of

  a Queen--thou wilt live to be consoled by thy Barbara! She

  wishes to be a Queen, and not a Queen Dowager, my gracious

  Lord!' And hanging upon poor Giglio's arm, and leering and

  grinning in his face in the most disgusting manner, this old

  wretch tripped off in her white satin shoes, and jumped into

  the very carriage which had been got ready to convey Giglio and

  Rosalba to church. The cannons roared again, the bells pealed

  triple-bobmajors, the people came out flinging flowers upon the

  path of the royal bride and bridegroom, and Gruff looked out of

  the gilt coach window and bowed and grinned to them. Phoo! the

  horrid old wretch!

  XIX. AND NOW WE COME TO THE LAST SCENE IN THE PANTOMIME

  The many ups and downs of her life had given the Princess

  Rosalba prodigious strength of mind, and that highly principled

  young woman presently recovered from her fainting-fit, out of

  which Fairy Blackstick, by a precious essence which the Fairy

  always carried in her pocket, awakened her. Instead of tearing

  her hair, crying, and bemoaning herself, and fainting again, as

  many young women would have done, Rosalba remembered that she

  owed an example of firmness to her subjects; and though she

  loved Giglio more than her life, was determined, as she told

  the Fairy, not to interfere between him and justice, or to

  cause him to break his royal word.

  'I cannot marry him, but I shall love him always,' says she to

  Blackstick; 'I will go and be present at his marriage with the

  Countess, and sign the book, and wish them happy with all my

  heart. I will see, when I get home, whether I cannot make the

  new Queen some handsome presents. The Crim Tartary crown

  diamonds are uncommonly fine, and I shall never have any use

  for them. I will live and die unmarried like Queen Elizabeth,

  and, of course, I shall leave my crown to Giglio when I quit

  this world. Let us go and see them married, my dear Fairy, let

  me say one last farewell to him; and then, if you please, I

  will return to my own dominions.'

  So the Fairy kissed Rosalba with peculiar tenderness, and at

  once changed her wand into a very comfortable coach-and-four,

  with a steady coachman, and two respectable footmen behind, and

  the Fairy and Rosalba got into the coach, which Angelica and

  Bulbo entered after them. As for honest Bulbo, he was

  blubbering in the most pathetic manner, quite overcome by

  Rosalba's misfortune. She was touched by the honest fellow's

  sympathy, promised to restore to him the confiscated estates of

  Duke Padella his father, and created him, as he sat there in

  the coach, Prince, Highness, and First Grandee of the Crim

  Tartar Empire. The coach moved on, and, being a fairy coach,

  soon came up with the bridal procession.

  Before the ceremony at church it was the custom in Paflagonia,

  as it is in other countries, for the bride and bridegroom to

  sign the Contract of Marriage, which was to be witnessed by

  the Chancellor, Minister, Lord Mayor, and principal officers of

  state. Now, as the royal palace was being painted and

  furnished anew, it was not ready for the reception of the King

  and his bride, who proposed at first to take up their residence

  at the Prince's palace, that one which Valoroso occupied when

  Angelica was born, and before he usurped the throne.

  So the marriage party drove up to the palace: the dignitaries

  got out of their carriages and stood aside: poor Rosalba

  stepped out of her coach, supported by Bulbo, and stood almost

  fainting up against the railings so as to have a last look of

  her dear Giglio. As for Blackstick, she, according to her

  custom, had flown out of the coach window in some inscrutable

  manner, and was now standing at the palace door.

  Giglio came up the steps with his horrible bride on his arm,

  looking as pale as if he was going to execution. He only

  frowned at the Fairy Blackstick--he was angry with her, and

  thought she came to insult his misery.

  'Get out of the way, pray,' says Gruffanuff haughtily. 'I

  wonder why you are always poking your nose into other people's

  affairs?'

  'Are you determined to make this poor young man unhappy?' says

  Blackstick.

  'To marry him, yes! What business is it of yours? Pray,

  madam, don't say "you" to a Queen,' cries Gruffanuff.

  'You won't t
ake the money he offered you?'

  'No.'

  'You won't let him off his bargain, though you know you cheated

  him when you made him sign the paper?'

  'Impudence! Policemen, remove this woman!' cries Gruffanuff.

  And the policemen were rushing forward, but with a wave of her

  wand the Fairy struck them all like so many statues in their

  places.

  'You won't take anything in exchange for your bond, Mrs.

  Gruffanuff,' cries the Fairy, with awful severity. 'I speak

  for the last time.'

  'No!' shrieks Gruffanuff, stamping with her foot. 'I'll have

  my husband, my husband, my husband!'

  'YOU SHALL HAVE YOUR HUSBAND!' the Fairy Blackstick cried; and

  advancing a step, laid her hand upon the nose of the KNOCKER.

  As she touched it, the brass nose seemed to elongate, the open

  mouth opened still wider, and uttered a roar which made

  everybody start. The eyes rolled wildly; the arms and legs

  uncurled themselves, writhed about, and seemed to lengthen

  with each twist; the knocker expanded into a figure in yellow

  livery, six feet high; the screws by which it was fixed to the

  door unloosed themselves, and JENKINS GRUFFANUFF once more trod

  the threshold off which he had been lifted more than twenty

  years ago!

  'Master's not at home,' says Jenkins, just in his old voice;

  and Mrs. Jenkins, giving a dreadful YOUP, fell down in a fit,

  in which nobody minded her.

  For everybody was shouting, 'Huzzay! huzzay!' 'Hip, hip,

  hurray!' 'Long live the King and Queen!' 'Were such things ever

  seen?' 'No, never, never, never!' 'The Fairy Blackstick for

  ever!'

  The bells were ringing double peals, the guns roaring and

  banging most prodigiously. Bulbo was embracing everybody; the

  Lord Chancellor was flinging up his wig and shouting like a

  madman; Hedzoff had got the Archbishop round the waist, and

  they were dancing a jig for joy; and as for Giglio, I leave you

  to imagine what HE was doing, and if he kissed Rosalba once,

  twice--twenty thousand times, I'm sure I don't think he was

  wrong.

  So Gruffanuff opened the hall door with a low bow, just as he

  had been accustomed to do, and they all went in and signed the

  book, and then they went to church and were married, and the

  Fairy Blackstick sailed away on her cane, and was never more

  heard of in Paflagonia.

  and here ends the Fireside Pantomime.

  End Project Gutenberg Etext of The Rose and the Ring