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  “You’re on, Cap,” Rachel reported.

  “I think you’re good on this side, Cap,” Wes added.

  “Listen up,” Doug said loudly. “It appears that we’ve somehow gotten ourselves a little lost. We are no longer in the Sol system. Off of our port bow is what looks to be a red giant star. It may take Cheezy some time to get our position. Until then we need to prep both ships for the long haul. Geek, Cheezy, find us a safe harbor until we can get our bearings. And check out that odd signal you found earlier but do it carefully.

  Trae, Fergus, check out this new hulk. Let’s get an inventory of everything on board. Mel, witches, for the time being, we are on minimal rations. Make the necessary adjustments and make all of our stores last as long as you can. Big Willy, Andy, once we get to a safe harbor, I want you over here to help Wes figure out this ship’s systems and make sure to re-label everything as you go. For right now, cut off all nonessential systems for max power conservation. We have no idea how long we’ll be here or how we’ll refuel without a spaceport. Captain out.”

  “Wes, Cheezy, get on it.”

  The bridge comms chime to life with the short blast of an old-world bosun’s whistle. “This sure is a fancy new ship you got here, Captain,” an unfamiliar voice said over the comm system. So much nicer than, the Betty, don’t you think? She even has that new ship smell to her,” the unknown voice audibly sniffed at the air. “But it looks to me that the reactor is near to going cold. Better get one of your boys down here to tend to it.”

  Wes spun around in his seat and stared at Doug with a look of utter disbelief. “That can’t be possible.”

  Doug’s brow furrowed. “What the hell? Was that the Chief? I thought we got rid of him with the bug bombs?”

  Wes’s eyes bulged with astonished surprise. “I thought we did too. Holy shit, that signal came from the engine room. How the hell did he get on board?”

  Doug keyed the intercoms. “Trae, Fergus, get back down to engineering. That stowaway that calls himself The Chief is loose down there somewhere. Toss him in with the Martians when you catch his crazy ass.”

  The short, high pitched whistle sounded again over the intercom, followed by the clatter of something plastic dropped to the metal deck plating. “Um … Cap. If I’m not mistaken that signal isn’t exactly high band. It’s a multilayered and highly compressed transmission.”

  “How the hell does he do that?” Wes stared at the helm as the controls took on a life of their own. He held his hands in the air and clear of the console. “I just lost helm control.”

  “Adjusting course by three point one four degrees to port. Here, listen to the difference,” the Chief said. Suddenly the modulated sound of static cleared and gave way to an odd, angelic sing-song. The voice flowed with a smooth and unbroken intonation of syllables like the flow of water in a Zen garden fountain.

  “Ya see, Cap,” the Chief continued, “we were just picking up the distorted fuzz along the edge of the transmission. So, I got us aligned with the signal and ran it through a decompression algorithm. You’re welcome, Chief out.”

  The comms went silent.

  “How the hell does he do that?” Wes turned in his seat to look back at Doug. “It’s like he’s a secret wizard of everything tech.”

  Doug sighed, “I don’t know, but I suppose I owe him a ration pack for helping us out.”

  cHAPTER 10

  Martian Frigate, Hans Landa

  Red Giant system asteroid belt

  May 23rd, 2176 / Late evening (Betty time)

  “H

  oly frijoles Cap!” Trae exclaimed. “The basic sensor package on this thing is way above any civilian system that I’ve ever seen. This is a state-of-the-art military spec sensor array.”

  “No shit,” Fergus added. “I could shove a BB up a gnat’s ass from ten thousand klicks with these targeting systems. See, check this out.” He fiddled with a control console on the port side of the bridge, then turned and looked up at the viewscreen. The alien asteroid field, backlit by the glowing red giant appeared on the viewscreen. “Are you ready?” Without a response, Fergus tapped the panel and the view screen zoomed in at a sickening rate. It halted its advance and focused on a very clear image of dust particles surrounded by what looked like snowflakes.

  “Wow,” Doug gasped in surprise. “What’s the distance?”

  Fergus snorted, suppressing a laugh. “Ninety-seven hundred klicks.”

  “Damn,” Trae gasped then whistled.

  “What else have you figured out?” Doug asked.

  “Oh, I’ve got this,” Fergus said with a wide grin. He quickly tapped away at the controls. “Once I figured out what all of these buttons did on this console, I fired off a probe to get a full layout of the system. It isn’t finished, but we have a good start.”

  The viewscreen zoomed out and tilted to display a top-down view of the red giant system. Large sections of the image were displayed in a washed-out gray. Three blinking dots, in the colorized area of the image actively blinked. Trae stepped in front of the viewscreen and pointed at the green and orange dots positioned near the lower half of the screen with his trusty laser pointer.

  “The green dot is the Betty and the orange is this ship, the Hans Landa.” Trae motioned about with a widespread of hands, then turned the pointer back to the screen. “The probe that Fergus launched earlier is the blue dot. So far we have found that there is an extensive debris field at just over one hundred and five million klicks from the star’s center. Roughly the distance from the Sun to Venus. We’ve also found a total of five planets with over twenty moons and a substantial debris field in this system’s Oort cloud that is at least four times as dense as the one surrounding the Sol system.”

  Trae sidestepped to the tactical console, glancing at the readout he nodded to Fergus and continued. “Okay, so nothing really out of the ordinary. Well, nothing other than we are now in an alien star system. We also know that there is an alien transmission. After we backtrack the path of that signal, go ahead Fergus,” Trae said with a nod. His laser pointer blazed to life again and pointed to a yellow line that zig-zagged it’s way across the screen.

  “We first sent the probe to check out the transmission, represented here by the yellow line. It looks to be a guidance signal that works its way through the asteroid field along a series of repeater probes, leading us back to this planet.” Trae pointed at the small image of a rocky brown world displayed on the screen. “Along this path, we did manage to find small bits of wreckage and what may have once been a field mining station built into one of the larger asteroids. The interesting discovery thus far is this ...” Trae grinned at Fergus and nodded.

  “With pleasure, my friend,” Fergus said.

  An image of the rocky brown world filled the screen.

  “This is the second planet of the system,” Trae continued. “Spectral analysis shows high concentrations of oxygen and nitrogen with traces of helium, argon, and carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. Assuming that these clouds,” he pointed the laser at the screen again, “contain water and not some acidic or poisonous compound, we may have ourselves a safe harbor. That in itself is very good, considering Willy needs to get the Betty on the ground to replace a few of the main coolant lines. He decided to err on the side of safety and not risk killing everyone on board by venting all atmosphere from engineering while he makes the repairs. Next image,” Trae said with a nod to Fergus.

  The view screen suddenly zoomed in and refocused on a dull bronze-colored object. Symmetrically shaped, like the wide ends of two cones glued together by a green glowing seam.

  “What in the hell is that,” Doug asked, his jaw dropped in astonishment.

  Trae snorted a laugh then smiled. “We don’t have a fucking clue.” He smiled wide. “But,” he said, extending his index finger, “we have a theory about it. Now mind you, what you are seeing are just long-distance images from our probe.”

  Doug gawked at the strange object on the screen. “Can we get
that thing into one of the cargo bays?”

  “Yes, it should easily fit into the Betty’s main bay, but there is a slight problem.” Trae nodded to Fergus again.

  The image suddenly zoomed out to redisplay an image of the planet, overlaid with a grid of golden dots that surrounded the planet.

  “There’s more than one,” Doug said with a sigh.

  “Precisely,” Trae said. “We don’t have an exact count yet, but there are possibly thousands of these things in orbit.”

  “Any idea what they are for?”

  “Not yet. Earth is surrounded by its own cloud of satellites and junk. These could be for communication, weather, defense, or any number of other things. There’s no way to tell for sure until we get hold of one and get a good look inside.”

  A warbled klaxon alarm roared to life. Trae sprinted to the helm station.

  “What the hell is that?” Doug shouted over the alarm.

  “We’re being painted boys and girls,” Fergus said.

  “If I’m reading this right, we’re being heavily scanned, Cap,” Trae added.

  “Hell, we’re being more than scanned. Something is trying to get into our computer core,” Fergus shouted.

  A new alarm sounded and mingled with the klaxon, but with an offbeat timing.

  “Bogey inbound,” Fergus shouted.

  “What the hell, from where? Get me a visual,” Doug ordered.

  “It’s the satellite grid! They’re powering up. Bogey impact in ten seconds,” Fergus reported.

  “It’s a defensive grid,” Doug mumbled to himself.

  The bridge of the Betty

  Red Giant system asteroid belt

  May 23rd, 2176 / Late evening (Betty time)

  “P

  ut it in your mouth and suck big boy,” Rachel said. She leaned across the center console between the helm and operations stations. She stretched, reaching to place the compressed energy bar into Wes’s mouth.

  “Absolutely not.” Wes leaned away and glared at Rachel.

  “Come on, just a little lick,” Rachel said. “Open up for Mommy, here comes the rocket ship.”

  “Oh, my, God.” Wes gasped. “What the hell is wrong with you? Are you demented or something? Get away from me.”

  “But Wesley, be a good boy and take a great big bite. You want to grow big and strong, don’t you?” Rachel waved the half-eaten snack bar toward Wes’s tightly clenched mouth, tapping him on the side of the face.

  “Stop,” he mumbled through the corner of his mouth. He cringed at the smell of the pickled fish bar. “Oh my God, that’s just disgusting.” He visibly clenched with revulsion with the beginnings of a dry heave.

  “Come on man,” Rachel begged. “I swear you can taste a sweet honey flavor after you get past the pickled herring bit. I need a second opinion. How the hell am I supposed to write a proper review on these things if I don’t collect all of the data I possibly can? Now open up,” she said as she fumbled for the closest nipple.

  “Help! Rape! Someone! Please! Someone get her off of me! I need an adult!”

  “Hey now, seriously,” Krista yelled from the open door of the Captain’s quarters. She clapped her hands together as she emerged from the doorway, wrapped in a silk robe. “That’s enough, both of you. Aren’t you two supposed to be doing something or another? And where the hell is Doug? Shouldn’t he be back by now?”

  “I’m trying to work, but she keeps trying to force-feed me these freaking nasty ass pickled fish bars.”

  “Meat candy,” she growled. “Get it right, Geek. Meat candy.”

  “Blegh,” Krista gagged. “Oh God, that’s just …” she took a deep breath and dry heaved again. “I’m good, it’s all good. Rainbows and butterflies, man. Rainbows and butterflies. Oh God, that’s just nasty. What the hell is wrong with you, Rachel? Really, who would eat that sort of thing willingly?”

  “See! What did I say?” Wes shouted at Rachel as he pointed to Krista.

  “Now Rachel,” Krista began to explain but gagged once again. “I’m alright. Now, a little fishy somethin’ somethin’ every now and then is all right, but not all the time, and especially not like that. That’s just wrong on many many levels.”

  “Nope, it doesn’t count. Taste it, Geek!” Rachel shoved the bar back into Wes’s face.

  “Children, enough!” Krista clapped her hands together and glared at the unruly pair. “You’re going to sit your asses down and do your work or so help me God …”

  “But it’s…,” Rachel looked away then back to Krista with a doe-eyed gaze. “It’s only a honey herring bar.”

  “Blegh,” Krista gagged.

  Wes exploded with chortled curses.

  “It ain’t funny,” Krista said. “Just the thought of that is freaking gross, man.” Krista scraped her tongue across her teeth in an attempt to remove the imaginary taste. “Just get back to whatever Doug had you working on or whatever. It’s late and I don’t fucking care anymore. Just be quiet. I’m going back to bed.” Krista shuffled back into the Captain’s quarters, slamming the door closed behind her.

  “How about trying an eel smoothie,” Rachel shouted. “I think there’s one left in the freezer.”

  “Blegh,” Krista gagged from behind the Captain’s door. “I can still hear you!”

  Wes and Rachel quietly snickered at Krista’s discomfort like a pair of mischievous imps. Rachel shoved the honey’d herring bar back into Wes’s face.

  “No!” Wes glared at her.

  The bridge door slid open with a mechanical hum.

  “Wesley, when are you coming to bed?” Kara pined, shuffling her way onto the bridge.

  Wes sighed. “Not any time soon at the rate that I’m going,” he said without taking his eyes off of Rachel. “Doug has me trying to figure out what that signal is for.”

  “But ... the bunk is so cold and lonely without my big teddy bear,” Kara said in a soft, innocent tone. She appeared behind Wes and began to massage his shoulders. “Come on to bed my big bull mastiff, I’ll make it worth your while.” She leaned in close and nibbled at his ear lobe. Dainty fingers skittered across his chest, teasing with an ever so delicate touch.

  “Hey, Kara would you …,” Rachel started.

  “No,” Wes interrupted. “She doesn’t want to try it either. Go away, Cheezy.”

  “Okay ...,” Kara’s gaze darted between the two with confusion.

  “Just ignore her and her imaginary friends, my dear,” Wes said, taking Kara’s hand and kissing it gently. “They are nothing but a bunch of ruffians and insane lunatics,” he said in his best high society voice.

  “Hey, I’m right here, and Bob doesn’t care much for that comment,” Rachel argued. “He says that it’s offensive and he doesn’t like you anymore.”

  Kara stepped around the chair and straddled Wes’s lap. “So, you’re coming to bed, right?” She lovingly massaged his face and scalp.

  “Um ...,” he hummed as he drifted into massaged bliss.

  “Are you even listening to me, Wesley?” She pinched his ear lobes.

  “Ouch, what the hell was that for?”

  “Are you coming to bed or not?” Kara asked. “I’m ready for bed and you’ve been up here on the bridge all day long. I’ve been lonely all day.” Kara snuggled herself closer and buried Wes’s face into her cleavage.

  “Oh my God. Get a room you two.” Rachel tossed the half-eaten fish bar into Wes’s face.

  “Dammit, Cheezy! Do you mind? We’re having a moment here and I happened to be enjoying that.” Wes shot her a look of disdain before turning his attention back to Kara. “No, I can’t come to bed yet,” he said softly. “I have to figure this out and help Cheezy find us a place to set down.”

  “But Wesley,” Kara whimpered.

  “No, but Wesley,” Wes said. “I have a job to do and if I don’t do it, we could all wind up dead.”

  Kara huffed. “Fine, I guess I’ll just have to warm up the sheets all by myself then.” She thrust out her lowe
r lip and dismounted. Her bare toes brushed against the control console as she swung her leg wide. Electronic beeps and blurbs rang out as her toes engaged the controls.

  “Holy hell!” Wes pushed Kara aside and checked the console. “Dammit, Kara! You sent a reply message.”

  “I wonder why I even try sometimes!” Kara stormed off of the bridge in a furious huff.

  “Hey, incoming signal. Data only,” Rachel said with a surprised glance to Wes.

  “What do we have here?” Wes mumbled with an intrigued tone. He brought up the signal on his console. A series of angular glyphs appeared on the screen. Below this were two selections in the same odd glyph-like language.

  “It’s asking you a question,” Rachel guessed.

  “I have no Earthly clue,” Wes said. “It would help if I knew the language.”

  “Well, it kinda looks like one of those survey, thingies. Like, did you enjoy your stay, yes or no,” Rachel said mockingly in her best infomercial voice.

  “Possibly, but I have no idea,” Wes said. “For all, we know it could be demanding our surrender or asking for parking fees.” Wes tapped at the console. “Well, that’s not good.”

  “What?”

  “It won’t let me cancel the message. It’s like it has the comm system locked until I answer the message.”

  “So, then answer it, Duffus.”

  “Dammit, Cheezy,” Wes said. “Don’t you get it? It isn’t that simple. We could all die if it happens to be the wrong answer to the wrong kind of question. We won’t know which is the right answer to the right question until it’s done, and it could be too late to save any of us from utter annihilation by that point.” He sucked in a breath.

  “So, then how would you go about clearing it?” Rachel asked. “You can’t just close it and reopen it so you can access the comm systems again?”

  “I’d have to shut down, and hard boot the entire operating system to be absolutely sure.”

  “So, then the answer is yes,” Rachel said.

  “No,” Wes growled. “I’m not answering yes. I don’t even know if that’s what it actually says or not. I can’t read it, Cheezy.”