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Her eyebrows lifted, but she remained silent.
Charlie dropped the ham in the skillet and forced himself to face her. “I thought everything was perfect. Then I started making career plans, and Lisa realized I wasn’t who she thought I was.”
“Who did she think you were?” Kendra asked hesitantly, almost as if she were afraid to pry but couldn’t stop the question from popping out of her mouth.
Bitterness filled his words. “A rising politician, the heir apparent to my father’s career.”
She seemed to consider his answer for a moment before she asked, “I gather you aren’t interested in politics?”
“Not at this point in my life anyway.” Charlie shook his head. “She wanted to be a politician’s wife. As soon as she realized I didn’t fit the bill, we broke up.”
“Well, I’m sure it’s better that you broke up with her instead of ending up with some social climber who wanted to change you into someone you’re not,” Kendra said, sympathy humming in her voice.
“How do you figure I broke up with her?”
“I don’t know.” Kendra’s shoulders lifted, understanding and compassion showing in her expression. “I just assumed that you wouldn’t want to stay with someone like that.”
“You know, you’re the first person to realize that I was the one who decided to break up.”
“Really?” Her eyes narrowed. “I would think it would be obvious to anyone who knows you.”
“You would think,” Charlie said, not quite able to hide the hurt in his voice. “Then again, you didn’t see Lisa storm out of our engagement party.”
Kendra winced. “Ouch. That must have been rough.”
“Not as rough as it would have been had we gotten married before she realized that I . . .” Charlie broke off, appalled that he’d nearly finished his sentence, that he’d nearly admitted that he was an FBI agent.
“That you what?”
Charlie kept his eyes on her, a slice of guilt sneaking through him as he deliberately evaded revealing the truth. “That I had other priorities in my life.”
Kendra’s shoulders lifted, and she looked at him sympathetically. “I’ve never dated anyone for very long, but I imagine it would be really tough to get over a break-up like that, especially if you were talking about marriage.”
Charlie’s eyes narrowed, and he looked at her quizzically. “What’s the longest you’ve ever dated anyone?”
“Two months,” Kendra told him ruefully. “And quite honestly, it was a disaster.”
“What do you mean?”
“I guess you could say that heavy security and possessive tendencies definitely don’t mix.”
“Keith Kerringer was possessive?” Charlie asked, referring to an actor Kendra had been linked to a year or two ago.
Kendra laughed. “I never dated Keith. That was just the paparazzi selling magazines.” Then she shook her head. “The possessive ex was Steve DeFoe. Things ended pretty badly considering that he came to see me in the middle of the night and ended up in jail.”
“On what charge?”
“Assault and trespassing.” She shook her head. “Alan came to my rescue when Steve showed up at my house in Malibu. They got into a fight, and Alan insisted on pressing charges.”
“Sounds like we both picked real winners,” Charlie said dryly. He flipped the ham in the skillet and opened the egg carton before glancing back over at her. “How long ago did you break up?”
“It’s been a long time, probably two or three years.”
Charlie’s voice was incredulous. “You haven’t dated anyone since then?”
Kendra shook her head. Her voice was casual, but embarrassment crept into her cheeks. “I’ve been focused on my career. Or at least my father has wanted my focus to be on my career.”
“And now you’re here in the mountains trying to figure out what you want in life?”
She managed to smile. “Pretty much.”
Charlie judged her mood, realizing this might be the right time to come clean with her, to ask her if she would accept FBI protection. “In that case, I have a very important question to ask you.”
Kendra’s posture immediately tensed, and Charlie altered his plan. He gave her a playful smile and asked, “How do you like your eggs?”
Chapter 18
Kendra stood beside the fireplace in her cabin and shivered. She looked at Charlie, who had followed her inside. Then she sighed as she considered her options. Mrs. Burgess had already called Charlie to check on them and had revealed that the power was out all over the mountain. She also gave them the bad news that the road leading up to their cabin was closed down and that it was unlikely that even snowmobiles were going to make it through for at least a couple of days.
Since trying to make it down the mountain in Charlie’s SUV was out, that left only two options. She could stay at her cabin and hope the fireplace would give her enough heat to keep her from freezing, or she could follow Charlie’s suggestion and move into his place until they regained electricity.
The simple fact was that the wood burning stove in Charlie’s cabin gave off sufficient heat to keep the whole cabin warm as long as the doors were kept open. It also provided a cooking method. As Kendra had discovered earlier, the fireplace in her parents’ cabin wasn’t likely to provide enough heat to allow her comfort during the day, much less when the temperature dropped after the sun went down. She also couldn’t imagine trying to cook over the open flames.
She turned to face Charlie. “Are you sure you don’t mind me crashing over there with you?”
“Kendra, it’s no big deal,” Charlie assured her. “But since we don’t know how long we’re going to be without power, you should probably bring most of your stuff with you. We aren’t going to want to keep walking back and forth in the snow.”
“Good point.” Kendra motioned to the back of the cabin. “I’m going to gather up my clothes. Would you mind packing up some of the groceries?”
“No problem.”
Forty-five minutes and three trips later, Kendra set her guitar down in Charlie’s living room and edged closer to the stove to warm up. While she had gathered her things, Charlie had cleaned out both of their refrigerators and put their food in an ice chest out on his back porch to keep everything cool. He had then put some meat and vegetables in a pot on the stove to simmer.
Kendra rubbed her hands together to warm them and gratefully turned when Charlie approached with two cups of hot chocolate.
“Here, this should help warm you up.”
Kendra’s eyes lit up as she grabbed the thick mug and took her first sip. “You’re my hero. This is exactly what I needed.”
Charlie chuckled. “You definitely aren’t hard to please.”
“Let’s hope you still think that tomorrow after you’ve been stuck with me for a while.”
“I think we can manage,” Charlie said wryly. Then he motioned to her guitar. “Maybe now that you’re staying over here, I’ll really get to hear you play.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “Did you want to hear me play?”
“I listen to you play every night.” Charlie settled down on the couch beside the fire and looked up at her.
“You can hear me all the way over here?”
“Just the guitar,” Charlie told her. “But feel free to sing me to sleep. I won’t mind.” His grin flashed. “Really.”
“Oh, you won’t, huh?” Kendra plopped down on the couch next to him. “I have a feeling the next day or two will definitely be an adventure.”
“If nothing else, you’re going to get to know me better than you probably wanted to.”
Kendra cocked her head to one side and considered for a moment. Then she shook her head. “I don’t know about that. I think I’m going to like getting to know you better.”
Charlie’s grin faded, and his voice lowered. “I hope so.”
* * *
Her words echoed in his head, his earbuds firmly in place as Kendra’s songs pla
yed over and over. The animal was fighting to break free again, that part of him that he was trying desperately to tame—or at least control. His fingers curled into fists, his short fingernails biting into the palms of his hands until twin trickles of blood oozed free.
He knew he should feel pain, but he was numb. Nothing was going to make him feel again until he had her. Nothing.
* * *
Charlie looked over at Kendra, who was sitting by the fire, her fingers fiddling with her guitar strings. He finished putting away the last of their dinner dishes and then walked into the living room. Already, the wood stove had warmed the living area, and the bedroom doors were open wide to let the heat seep into them as well.
Kendra had unpacked her things in the bedroom closest to the living room before settling down on one of the couches. Even though the room had warmed significantly, she still had a blanket wrapped loosely around her shoulders and another one draped over her legs. The only light in the room came from the lantern he’d bought, the flickering flames casting shadows over her in the otherwise dark room.
She played a few chords and then started playing a melody, one that Charlie had heard only vague snippets of during Kendra’s late-night sessions. She stopped a couple times, scratching down some notes in the notebook beside her. Then, once she seemed satisfied, she began again, and this time her voice joined the melody.
Charlie lowered himself onto the couch opposite of her and simply stared. She was so beautiful, her hair flowing over her shoulders, her face free of makeup. Her voice stroked over the unfamiliar words, huskier than it normally sounded on the radio.
When she segued into the next song, Charlie realized that she was completely absorbed in her music. He doubted she even remembered he was there. She made it halfway through the second song before she stopped abruptly and shifted to write something in her notebook again. Then she picked up where she’d left off.
She repeated the same song several times, sometimes making changes as she went. Then, finally, she seemed satisfied. She set her guitar aside and rolled her shoulders restlessly. That’s when she looked over and saw Charlie staring.
Even in the darkness, Charlie could see her cheeks flush.
His voice was soft. “That was nice.”
“Thanks.” She pulled her blanket tighter around her shoulders and curled her legs up underneath her.
“I gather that’s one of your new songs,” Charlie commented. When she nodded, he asked, “How long does it take you to write one?”
“It depends. Sometimes I can get one down in an hour or two.” Kendra shrugged. “Others can take as long as a couple months.”
“It must be a lot easier to write when you’re away from everything.”
She couldn’t stop the grin. “I’ve been averaging a song a night since I got here. I’ve never had the music flow so well before.”
“You’ve never had this kind of freedom before.”
“I know.” Kendra stared out the window for a minute. “I keep wondering how I can find this kind of freedom after I leave here. When I think about what could be waiting for me at home, I don’t want to even think about going back.”
“Have you thought any more about talking to the FBI, maybe letting them protect you?”
Kendra sighed. “Every time I think about it, I remember how smothered I felt before I came here.” Her eyes met his. “I just don’t think I can live like that again.”
Charlie took a deep breath. “If the Malibu Stalker finds you, you may not live at all.”
She fell silent for a minute. Then she nodded slowly. “Which is why I’m not going back to Malibu.”
“What?”
“If all of this guy’s victims lived in Malibu, then I’ll steer clear of there until they catch him,” Kendra told him. “I can move back to my house in Nashville, or I have a condo in Phoenix I can stay at.”
“That’s not a bad idea, but you should really still have some kind of protection,” Charlie said gently. “If this guy has keyed in on you, moving won’t necessarily stop him from coming after you. Serial killers tend to be obsessive. They don’t stop until they get what they want or until they are arrested.”
Her eyebrows drew together in concentration. “Sounds like you know a lot about this kind of stuff.”
Charlie shrugged and chose his words carefully. “I should. We study a variety of criminal cases in law school. Serial killers are definitely among the scariest.”
An unexpected edge came into her voice. “Well, I’m sure I’ll sleep well tonight now.”
“I’m sorry, Kendra,” Charlie said, wondering if he had pushed too hard. “I’m just worried about you.”
“I know.” She managed to keep her voice steady, but Charlie could see the tears glistening in her eyes. Immediately, a stab of guilt shot through him.
“Hey, I really am sorry,” Charlie began, shifting to take a seat beside her. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“I know,” Kendra managed. Then she leaned into him, and Charlie automatically wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She took a deep breath, as though fighting against her emotions. “I guess I just keep hoping that all of this will go away, that the police will find out who the stalker is so I can feel safe again.”
“They’ll find him,” Charlie assured her, praying his words were true. He tried not to think about how well she fit beside him, but he couldn’t manage to resist lifting a hand to toy with the ends of her hair.
She looked up at him, those fascinating green eyes so full of trust. “I can’t imagine what I would have done if you hadn’t come up here. You’ve been a godsend.”
Charlie managed to smile as he tried to ignore the attraction that sizzled between them. “I don’t know about that. I think I’m the lucky one.”
She shifted slightly so she could see his face better. “How so?”
“For one thing, this trip has given me the chance to get to know you,” Charlie told her.
“I hope that’s a good thing.”
“Yeah, that’s a good thing.” He gave her shoulder a squeeze and then forced himself to pull away and stand up. “We should get some sleep.”
Kendra nodded, but she didn’t stand. Instead, she spoke, her voice hesitant. “Charlie?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think you could . . .” She trailed off for a moment. Then she took a deep breath and asked, “Would you mind giving me a blessing?”
“I’d be happy to give you a blessing,” Charlie responded automatically. The question had caught him off guard, but he found himself touched by the simplicity of her request and by her obvious faith. He circled the couch so he could stand behind her, trying to recall the last time someone had asked him to exercise his priesthood. He found himself a little nervous when he realized that he hadn’t given anyone a blessing outside of his immediate family since he had completed his mission almost eight years ago. “What’s your full name?”
“Kendra Elizabeth.”
He uttered a silent prayer for inspiration as he laid his hands on Kendra’s head and began. He was hesitant at first, his words awkward. Then he felt the Spirit flow through him as he offered Kendra a blessing of comfort and peace. He assured her that her Heavenly Father loved her and that He was mindful of her needs and the innermost desires of her heart.
Charlie’s voice caught with emotion when he continued to tell her that the Lord had put people in her life to help her with her current challenges and that, with faith, she could overcome all obstacles placed before her.
As soon as Charlie finished, Kendra looked up, her face streaked with tears. She offered him a watery smile and whispered, “Thank you.”
Charlie nodded, not trusting his voice as he stepped to her side.
Kendra reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze. “You know, it was really nice being able to ask for a blessing without having to pick up the phone first. I’ve always wondered what that would be like.”
Charlie looked at her a little confused
before remembering that she had grown up without the priesthood in her home. “I guess that’s something I always took for granted.”
She nodded and gave him a sleepy look. “Good night, Charlie.”
“Good night.” He picked up the lantern and followed her to her bedroom doorway to make sure she could see okay. Then he moved into the next room and turned down his covers. He set the lantern on the bedside table and knelt down on the floor.
As he began his nightly prayer, he found himself plagued with old doubts and unresolved questions. He thought of the woman he’d planned to marry more than two years before and of the events that had transpired before he’d realized Lisa didn’t love him as much as she loved his social status. Even though he understood that all women weren’t like that, logic hadn’t helped him get past the hurt enough to start dating again.
His early years of dating had been so fun and carefree, and he desperately wanted to find someone he could be that way with again. And he found himself asking for guidance on what to do about Kendra. When he had blessed her, he knew that he had been put here with her for a purpose. Now he needed to know what that purpose was. His questions poured out, and he prayed that he would find the answers soon. He especially hoped that he could find a way to tell Kendra the truth about his being with the FBI.
When he finally ended his prayer, he climbed into bed beneath the stack of blankets, his thoughts once again dwelling on the intriguing woman lying in the next room.
Chapter 19
Charlie slept restlessly and woke early with a new resolve. He needed to keep a professional distance between himself and Kendra. He kept letting himself get pulled into the illusion that life was normal and that they were both free to pursue a relationship, but as fascinating as he found her, Kendra was a target and the possible means to finding the man who was responsible for six murders. It was high time he get his priorities straight and stop letting himself get distracted.
The last thing he needed was to get attached to another woman who wouldn’t support his career choice. Kendra’s lifestyle would never mesh with his, even if she was willing to date an FBI agent. Her life was concerts and television appearances. His was stakeouts and court dates. And in addition to all of that, the very nature of his job—protection—didn’t sit well with her. It could never work.