The Worst Witch Saves the Day Read online

  back from Mildred’s neck and shoulders as she fled down the corridor, the hair flowing like a train behind her. Meanwhile, Enid and Maud hung out of the window, clutching at handfuls of hair and shouting words of encouragement to Tabby, who was now moaning in a deep, unearthly way that echoed eerily around the whole school. The poor first-years huddled in their beds, already tearful with second thoughts about the school they now found themselves in, listened with horror to the sinister noise of what sounded like a distant ghost-cat and trembled with fear and longing to be at home again.

  Mildred reached the end of the corridor, surrounded by a large crowd of pupils, all trying to help by tossing the hair behind her and trying to stop it snaking through the open bedroom doors as she passed by. She stopped for a moment to catch her breath.

  ‘Is Tabby all right?’ she called anxiously, attempting to look back. ‘Has anyone got a copy of Year Three Spell Sessions?’

  They all stopped in their tracks as Miss Hardbroom materialized at the top of the stairs.

  CHAPTER NINE

  ildred Hubble,’ announced Miss Hardbroom’s chilling voice, managing to sound quiveringly irate and slightly weary at the same time. ‘Mildred Hubble. What on earth have you been doing up here, inciting the entire form into some sort of riot?’

  ‘It’s – it’s my hair, Miss Hardbroom,’ wittered Mildred. ‘Something terrible has happened to my hair.’

  ‘I can see that,’ said Miss Hardbroom. She paused for a moment, then continued with a sneery smile. ‘I took one look at the situation and thought to myself, “Mildred Hubble seems to be having what you girls might term a bad-hair day.”’

  This was such an unexpected witticism from Miss Hardbroom that several of the girls burst out laughing. Now that Mildred had stopped, the hair was bunching up over the top of her head like an out-of-control candyfloss machine and attempting to loop over her face on to the floor.

  ‘Oh, for goodness’ sake!’ exclaimed Miss Hardbroom. She muttered the words of the reversal spell and directed her fingers in a zap at the hair, which suddenly stopped growing.

  Just at that moment, Ethel’s door opened and she came out.

  ‘I was trying to sleep, Miss Hardbroom,’ she said, rubbing her eyes as if she had just woken up. ‘Is there anything I can do to help?’

  ‘Yes, you can, Ethel,’ said Miss Hardbroom. ‘Go and fetch a pair of scissors so that I can restore some orderly calm to us all.’

  ‘Is Tabby back in yet?’ said Mildred. ‘I don’t want to cut my hair so that he falls off the end.’

  ‘Don’t worry, Mildred,’ called Maud, shouldering her way through the carpet of hair. ‘We’ve got him. Look, he’s perfectly all right.’

  Tabby didn’t look perfectly all right at all. He was wild-eyed and frozen with terror, riveted on to the front of Maud’s pyjamas, emitting a strange pulsing sound like a deep growl crossed with the continuous whine of a faulty vacuum cleaner.

  ‘What length do you want this, Mildred Hubble?’ asked Miss Hardbroom, snapping the scissors impatiently.

  ‘Just like it was before, please, Miss Hardbroom,’ replied Mildred meekly.

  Ethel came running up with the scissors and Miss Hardbroom cut the hair (rather jaggedly) so that it was back to its usual length.

  ‘Would you like me to do the spell to clear the remainder of the hair away, Miss Hardbroom?’ asked Ethel. ‘I’ve studied this spell and I know all about it. I could have stopped the hair growing if Mildred had asked, but it didn’t occur to me that she would actually attempt to use such an advanced spell – and for such a trivial reason – and at this time of night!’

  ‘It’s all right, thank you, Ethel,’ said Miss Hardbroom approvingly. ‘I’ll deal with it. Now back to bed with all of you. Not another peep out of anyone. I’ll have to have another word with Miss Granite about you, Mildred. She obviously has no idea how to deal with you. I might have known who it was at the bottom of the hoo-ha going on above us in the staff room tonight.’

  As the girls picked their way back through the swathes of hair to their rooms, Miss Hardbroom chanted the final part of the spell and the remaining hair evaporated into thin air. Mildred put a hand up to her regrown hair to make sure it was still there and, to her relief, it was.

  ‘Thanks for nothing, Ethel,’ muttered Mildred, as she passed Ethel’s door. ‘You always manage to drop me in it, don’t you?’

  Ethel smiled jauntily. ‘Keep your hair on, Mildred,’ she said, as she closed the door with a triumphant flourish.

  CHAPTER TEN

  ildred was utterly exhausted when she woke the next morning after the horror of the Bad-hair Day. Tabby was still in a terrible state. He seemed to have gone into a trance, hanging on to Mildred’s pillow with a wide-eyed, almost vacant stare, as if he could see dreadful things in the distance. It had taken Mildred half an hour to prise him from Maud’s front the night before, leaving a large rip in Maud’s pyjamas where he wouldn’t let go. Now he leapt on to Mildred’s shoulders and clung tightly with his claws as she struggled to plait her regrown hair and put on her uniform.

  Maud put her head round the door with her own cat, Midnight (a nice, normal, easygoing black one), perched like a parrot on her shoulder.

  ‘How are you feeling, Mildred?’ Maud asked kindly.

  ‘Neck’s a bit stiff,’ replied Mildred, ‘and Tabby seems to have had a complete nervous breakdown, but apart from that everything’s fine.’ She smiled ruefully.

  ‘Miss Granite just came round and said we’re all to take our brooms down to the courtyard for some cat and broomstick practice,’ said Maud.

  ‘Oh no!’ said Mildred. ‘Not yet. Not straight away. Look at Tab. He just won’t be able to cope. Do you think we could leave our cats in the bedroom?’

  ‘No chance,’ said Maud. ‘ “Year Threes must fly with their cats at all times”! Don’t you remember? It’s traditional. From this year on, the cats have to come with us everywhere.’

  ‘You haven’t got any travel-sickness pills or anything, have you, Maud?’ asked Mildred hopefully. ‘Perhaps he’d feel a bit calmer if he had one of those. He really looks as if he’s lost his marbles.’

  ‘Sorry, Mil,’ said Maud. ‘I’ve only got some vitamin pills and I don’t think they’d be any use – although they are supposed to make children more intelligent if they take them regularly. Perhaps they might work on cats!’

  ‘Don’t be mean, Maud,’ said Mildred with a smile. ‘He’s not that dim!’

  After breakfast, Form Three trooped off to the schoolyard, Mildred with Tabby clinging to her front like a koala, where Miss Granite was waiting for them. She was sitting on a bench, rummaging in her large bag, while the girls stood around holding their brooms and cats, wondering what to do. Miss Granite pulled out an apple and began to eat it noisily, her dark glasses twinkling in the sun, smiling at everyone.

  ‘Excuse me, Miss Granite,’ said Ethel, stepping forward, her broomstick hovering alongside with her cat, Nightstar, neatly perched on the back. ‘Is there any particular manoeuvre you would like us to practise? I’m especially good at nosedives and speed loop-the-loops. Would you like me to –’

  ‘Whatever you want, dear,’ said Miss Granite in her strange, high-pitched squeak. ‘I’m feeling a little tired today and I think I might go and lie down. Perhaps you would like to take the lesson for me – er – what is your name, dear?’

  ‘Ethel Hallow, Miss Granite,’ said Ethel, almost purring with deep happiness at the thought of having Form Three in her clutches.

  ‘Ethel,’ said Miss Granite, ‘you make sure everyone does the right stuff. I’ll come along later and check.’

  Mildred glanced at Maud as Miss Granite waddled up the steps into the school.

  ‘This is so strange,’ said Mildred. ‘She doesn’t seem to know what to do with us, does she?’

  ‘She doesn’t,’ said Ethel, ‘but I do. Come along now, Form Three, I’m in charge. Would you please remove that joke of a witch’s cat fro
m your clothing, Mildred Hubble, and apply it to the back of your broomstick.’

  ‘Why don’t you lay off, Ethel Hallow?’ said Enid. ‘You’re not the teacher, whatever our “hey-man” new form-mistress says. I’m beginning to wish we’d still got H.B. if we’re going to have to put up with you bossing us all around.’

  ‘It’s true, Ethel,’ said Maud. ‘We’re all perfectly capable of organizing our own flying lesson if Miss Granite’s left us to it. We don’t need any helpful comments from you.’

  ‘Tabs has had a dreadful shock, Ethel,’ said Mildred, putting her arms protectively round Tabby and smoothing his head. ‘He nearly died last night, dangling out of the window like that. He’s stressed, poor thing. I’m really glad we’ve got an easy day and I’m certainly not going to force him to do any flying.’

  But Ethel had other ideas. She hoisted herself calmly on to her broomstick, Nightstar bolt upright on the back, and swooped past Mildred, snatching Tabby from her arms with one expert grab.

  ‘Nonsense, Mildred,’ Ethel yelled, as she zoomed upwards towards the roof turrets. ‘Stress indeed! What this cat needs is to pull himself together! He’s been flying for two years now. He knows how to do it. Look at him!’

  Mildred looked. Tabby was half on the back of the broom and half hanging on to Ethel’s sash. He was so shocked that he wasn’t making a sound. To make matters worse, Nightstar, who was extremely territorial about his broomstick (and Ethel), was taking vicious swipes at Tabby’s ears every time Ethel turned her back.

  ‘Ethel!’ shrieked Mildred. ‘Bring him back! He’ll fall off. Please!’

  ‘Come back, Ethel,’ shouted Maud, as Ethel and the two cats disappeared from view into a swirl of mist surrounding the topmost turrets.

  A few members of Form Three thought Ethel was right and that Tabby would be safe with her giving him a special lesson, but most of the girls were firmly on Mildred’s side, patting her shoulder and calling up to the rooftops for Ethel to come back at once.

  ‘It’s no use,’ said Mildred. ‘I’ll have to go and get him back. Oh, Maud. I’m just a walking disaster area at the moment – well, all the time, really – aren’t I? It’s just been one thing after another. I’ll never keep up with Ethel; she’ll be doing loop-the-loops and goodness knows what.’

  ‘Don’t worry, Mil,’ said Enid. ‘We’ll come up with you, won’t we, Maud?’

  ‘You bet!’ said Maud. ‘With three of us we can head her off and perhaps make her see reason.’

  They all snorted with grim laughter at this unlikely prospect.

  ‘Come on, then!’ called Mildred, as she set off in hot pursuit. ‘We’d better be quick.’

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  here was no sign of Ethel among the rooftops and turrets as the three friends landed on a wide patch of slanting roof. They propped their brooms next to them and kept quiet in case they could hear the sound of Ethel flying. Surprisingly, there’s quite a lot of noise from someone on a broomstick, especially if they are moving fast. The broomstick itself makes a swishing noise as it cuts through the air, and gymslips and cloaks tend to flap in the wind. But although they kept completely still, there was no sound from anywhere.

  ‘Let’s split up,’ suggested Enid. ‘I’ll take the lower courtyard at the back.’

  ‘I’ll go over the wall above the forest,’ said Maud. ‘You can see for miles down the mountain if you just go a little way.’

  ‘OK,’ said Mildred. ‘I’ll stay up here for a minute. She might be hiding somewhere and if she hears you both fly off she might think it’s safe to come out.’

  ‘Good thinking, Batgirl,’ said Enid.

  ‘Good luck!’ said Maud.

  Mildred leaned back against the slates as Maud and Enid took off from the ridge tiles, their cats looking calm and confident on the back of their brooms. Mildred felt the usual guilty twinge as she imagined, for a brief second, how different it might have been if she had been given a sensible black cat all those years ago. Just as quickly, she pushed the disloyal thought out of her mind and craned forward as she heard the unmistakable sound of someone taking off from the other side of the roof. Mildred’s theory had been spot on.

  Ethel passed above her head by several centimetres, close enough for Mildred to see Tabby, now hanging upside down like a sloth, with Nightstar swiping at Tabby’s paws where they curled round the top of the broom. Tabby let out a desperate yowl when he saw his mistress below him, and Mildred, completely forgetting where she was, made a lunge upwards with both hands to pull him off. She missed, and three awful things happened at the same time. First of all, Mildred lost her balance and began sliding down the tiles, scrabbling madly with her fingers as she slithered towards the edge. Secondly, Tabby, who thought Mildred was reaching up to save him, let go of the broom and tumbled off, bouncing and yowling as he tried to save himself on the other side of the roof, and thirdly, Mildred dislodged her precious new broom, which plummeted to the yard far below, before she had time to command it.

  Ethel heard the commotion as Mildred began to fall and turned in mid-air, putting the broom into a superb nosedive and coming up underneath Mildred at the very moment that she shot off the roof into space. Mildred fell perfectly into place behind Ethel, grabbing her round her waist and nearly squashing the indignant Nightstar. The cat’s sense of

  balance was so amazing that he merely jumped neatly out of the way and settled straight back into his usual upright stance, looking faintly annoyed.

  ‘Yessss!’ exclaimed Ethel. ‘Say thank you, Mildred! I just saved your life.’

  ‘Wait, Ethel!’ yelled Mildred, as Ethel aimed for the courtyard where Form Three were gazing anxiously upwards.

  ‘We must go back and find Tabby. He’s still up there by himself. He might be hurt.’

  ‘Not me!’ said Ethel. ‘I’ve had enough of trying to help you and that stupid animal. He’s a cat, Mildred – even if he has only got one brain cell and he’s not a real witch’s cat. Even a farmyard tabby knows how to fall and has the usual nine lives. He’ll find his own way down.’

  Ethel landed gracefully amid the excited pupils, and Mildred jumped off as quickly as possible, embarrassed to be seen hanging on to her arch enemy.

  ‘Pity about your new broom,’ said Ethel. ‘Now it’s just like your old one. Poor you. Flying really isn’t your strong point, is it?’

  Mildred saw that her broom had hit the corrugated-iron roof of the broom-shed as it fell and had completely broken in half. At this point Enid and Maud arrived back in the yard and found Mildred holding her ruined broom, trying not to cry.

  ‘What’s happened?’ asked Enid, putting an arm round Mildred.

  ‘Everything,’ said Mildred, bursting into tears. ‘This term can’t get any worse, can it? Now Tabby’s up on the rooftops somewhere, probably unconscious, and my lovely new broom’s in exactly the same state as the old one. If only Miss Granite would take charge a bit, these awful things wouldn’t keep happening.’

  ‘I’ll go and fetch some tape, Millie,’ said Maud. ‘Strong sticky tape will fix anything and I think I’ve got some really good glue somewhere.’

  Maud returned with a roll of tape and a tube of superglue. They spread the glue around the splintered spikes of wood and jammed them together, then bound the join with several layers of tape.

  ‘Better leave it for a few hours so it can set,’ said Enid.

  ‘But I can’t leave Tabby up there,’ said Mildred. ‘He might be hurt. Can I borrow your broom, Maud, please? I promise nothing will happen to it – I’ll be so careful,’ she added, as she saw Maud glancing doubtfully at the bundle of sticky tape. ‘I’ll just take a quick look around and come straight back if I can’t see him. Please, Maudy.’

  ‘All right,’ said Maud, trying not to sound nervous. ‘But only be ten minutes, OK?’

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  ildred jumped on to Maud’s broom and was up among the turrets within seconds. She landed on a flat area with an old chimney stack in th
e middle and dismounted so that she could take a calm look around. To her delight, she saw Tabby at once. He was two rooftops away, curled up in a miserable hunch underneath a window.

  ‘Tabby!’ called Mildred. ‘Don’t move! I’m coming over.’

  Tabby didn’t respond at all. He was making his low, growly whining noise, looking across at Mildred with eyes like saucers.

  Suddenly Mildred heard a voice coming from the window – an unmistakable high-pitched, squeaky voice. ‘Who is out there?’ called the voice. ‘Come along now, I know someone’s there!’

  Mildred ducked behind the chimney stack as Miss Granite leaned out of the window and spotted Tabby cowering just below the window sill. She reached out, bundled him up the

  wall into her arms and disappeared back inside the room. Mildred flew down to the courtyard.

  ‘Well?’ called Maud, as her friend came in to land. ‘Any luck?’

  ‘Sort of,’ said Mildred glumly. ‘Miss Granite’s room is up there and Tabs was outside her window, so she’s taken him into her room. At least he’ll be safe inside and he didn’t look as though he’d broken anything. He did look a bit barmy though. If anything else happens to him, I don’t think he’ll ever get back to normal.’

  ‘Are you going to ask Miss Granite if you can collect him?’ asked Enid.

  ‘Tricky,’ said Mildred. ‘We’re not supposed to go up that high. On the other hand, Miss Granite doesn’t seem to mind what we do.’

  ‘Doesn’t she?’ said a squeaky voice, as Miss Granite materialized, H.B. -style, behind them. ‘I think you’ll find that I do mind what’s going on behind my back. Now then – Mildred Hubble, isn’t it? I’d like to know what your cat was doing fifty metres up in an area that’s out of bounds to you girls.’