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At the end of the day, Jared found his daughters with Emily in her office, building houses with glue and tongue depressors.
“Have you gotten hold of your cousin?” she asked as soon as she saw him. She lowered her eyes.
Was she trying to avoid the pull of attraction that he was feeling, too? He’d been away from the dating circuit for so long, maybe he was mistaking her kindness for chemistry.
“I’ve left messages for her. I’m hoping she’ll call me this evening.” Then before he even realized what he planned to do, he asked, “Can I repay you tonight with a take-out dinner? Or have you spent enough time in the company of kids?”
He’d never invited a woman back to the house with his girls. Actually, he was hoping for a little adult conversation that wasn’t professional in nature. How long had it been since he’d spent a casual evening talking?
Just talking? his conscience asked. He ignored it.
A light pink color rose to Emily’s cheeks as her gaze met his again. “I’d like that. But I should go home and change first.”
“There’s nothing wrong with what you’re wearing.”
Her eyes widened in surprise as if she hadn’t expected him to notice. Oh, he’d noticed all right. Her slim jacket delineated her breasts and molded to her waist. The tailored slacks fit her hips perfectly.
“I thought casual might be better with the girls.” Then she blushed. “I don’t even know where you live. Do you have a place here in Lubbock?”
“I don’t live far from the hospital. You live in Sagebrush, don’t you?”
“Yes. I share a house with two friends. Actually one now. Tessa got married last week.”
“Tessa McGuire? The pediatrician?”
“Yes. It’s Rossi now. Do you know her?”
“We’ve consulted a few times.”
“My other roommate is Francesca Talbot.”
He nodded. “The neonatologist. I’ve consulted with her more than with Dr…. Rossi.”
“I met them after I took my job here. It’s more economical to share a house than—” Her cheeks grew a little pinker. “More information than you need to know,” she said with a small smile.
He found he wanted to know so much more about Emily, and that was dangerous. He never intended to marry again. And to get involved when he had little spare time seemed foolish. Yet she was so pretty with her curly hair, high cheekbones and big brown eyes. She had a great figure, too. His ex-wife had always been way too thin. Had the cancer started before anyone knew it? He should have looked closer…deeper.
Courtney took Emily’s hand. “Come home wif us?”
She hesitated as if she might be having second thoughts, then smiled. “It would be silly of me to drive back to Sagebrush to change. I’ll follow you if that’s okay.”
“Sounds good,” Jared agreed, determined to forget about the past at least for tonight and not think too seriously about kissing Emily. It was a good thing his daughters would be around as pint-sized chaperones. He really didn’t need an entanglement or a complication in his life, especially now with his mother in the hospital. He’d call her on the way home. He should stop in tonight…. There were never enough hours in the day.
A half hour later, Jared set the takeout on his dining-room table. Emily was at his elbow, close enough to touch. He found the idea of touching her aroused him. His sexual urges had been in deep freeze for so long that he welcomed feeling alive again.
So much for pint-sized chaperones. They were already digging into their toy box in the great room.
“Girls, go on to the bathroom and wash your hands. I’ll be there in a minute.”
Jared went to the kitchen and Emily followed. “What can I do?”
Apparently she was a doer like he was. “Set the table?” he suggested, opening the cabinet that held dishes.
There were two sets—plain white ironstone dishes and then a collection of cream china with tiny blue roses.
“Oh, how pretty,” Emily commented.
“Those are my mother’s. She insists we use them every holiday. They have to be hand-washed.”
“You don’t like the tradition?”
“I never thought of it that way—as a tradition, I mean. When I was growing up—” He stopped short. “Traditions are okay as long as they bring along happy memories with them. Those dishes don’t.”
Emily looked puzzled, but he wasn’t going to go into his background. Not now. Probably not ever.
“I understand you’re a widower,” Emily said. “How long has it been since your wife died?”
He stopped for a moment, startled because she’d been so direct.
“I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have mentioned it. It’s one of the pieces of information everyone at Family Tree has about you.”
“One of the pieces?” He lifted dishes from the cupboard, not knowing whether to be amused or annoyed.
He could see Emily was flustered, but she went ahead anyway. “Everyone seems to know you’re a widower and have three-year-old twin girls.”
“Three and a half,” he amended. “And if that’s all ‘everyone’ knows, I guess I should consider myself lucky.”
After setting the dinnerware on the counter, he leaned back against it and crossed his arms over his chest. As soon as he did it, he knew it was a defensive gesture. He was feeling defensive. Still, Emily’s honesty prompted the same kind of honesty from him.
“Two years ago I was divorced. Six months later my wife died of cancer.”
“I’m so sorry.”
He uncrossed his arms and let them drop to his sides. “Valerie had had custody of the girls and I had liberal visitation rights. But taking over their full care was a real shocker.”
“I imagine it must have been.”
Usually he didn’t want to talk about this with anyone, but he found discussing the situation with Emily wasn’t so bad. “My mother stepped in to help. Honestly, I don’t know what I would have done without her. Hired a nanny, I guess. That’s what I’m going to have to do now until she’s back on her feet. I set up an interview with someone from a service tomorrow afternoon.”
That was certainly enough about him. He wanted to know more about Emily. “I remember from your application that you were from Corpus Christi.”
“Yes, I was born and raised there. I’d never lived anywhere else until I moved to Sagebrush.”
“Culture shock?”
“From east Texas to west Texas, beach to plains. I’m getting used to it. I’m even beginning to like it.”
“You intend to stay here?”
“I hope to. I like my work. I’ve made great friends. What else could a girl ask for?”
There was something in Emily’s eyes that told him she might like a lot more, children maybe, a family. He noticed she didn’t wear perfume, not the kind other women wore, anyway. But she always smelled like a summer garden. Maybe it was her shampoo. Maybe something she dabbed in intimate places.
They were standing close, close enough that if he leaned forward just a little—
But she suddenly caught her breath. He leaned away. Then he cleared his throat and, feeling as awkward as a teenager, mumbled, “I’d better see what trouble the girls are getting into.” If that wasn’t an exit line, he didn’t know what was.
When he and Amy and Courtney returned to the dining room, he stopped short. Emily hadn’t just put food on the dishes; she’d set places, napkins included. She’d found a place mat from somewhere, put that in the middle and piled the entrees on platters and the sides in serving dishes. Instead of the plastic forks and spoons from the restaurant, she’d used real silverware.
“I hope you girls are hungry.” She pulled out a chair for each of them so they could hop on. She pushed Amy in while he helped Courtney.
Leaning close to him, she said in a low voice, “I thought the girls would have trouble eating with the plastic forks.”
“Are you used to spending time with children?” She seemed to know exac
tly what to do.
“I’ve never had any of my own, but when I was in Corpus Christi, I volunteered in a pediatric ward when I had time off.”
So that’s how she’d spent her free time. He was seeing facets of Emily he’d never had time to explore.
“Have you ever been married?” he asked as he pulled her chair out for her.
She looked surprised he’d done the gentlemanly thing. It had been a long time since he’d wanted to do the gentlemanly thing.
“Yes, I was married. I’ve been divorced about a year.”
Now it was his turn to ask a blunt question. “Is that why you moved here?”
This time she didn’t hesitate. “I needed a fresh start.”
His hands were on the chair back, close to her hair. She was looking up at him over her shoulder. He was so tempted to push her curls away from her face, to erase the little frown line on her forehead, to tell her he understood about wanting a new beginning.
Yet he’d figured out the past dogged him no matter where he went, or how badly he tried to forget. Did her past dog her, too?
The urge to ask her was strong and on the tip of his tongue when the cell phone on his belt beeped. He almost swore, and then he realized he should be glad for the interruption. This evening was becoming intense and personal.
Straightening, he unhitched the phone, checked the number and held it to his ear. It was his service. Crossing to the counter, he found a notepad and a pen and jotted down the number.
He said to Emily, “I think Lubbock is about to have a new citizen who doesn’t want to wait until its due date. I have to check with the mother-to-be. Go ahead and start eating.”
As he dialed his patient, he noticed Emily asking the girls what they wanted and then selecting their food for them and helping them with it. She was so conscious of what they needed…such a natural with them.
When he finished on the phone, she took one look at his face and asked, “Do you need me to stay with the girls?”
He didn’t want to ask her to do that. He certainly didn’t want to depend on her. If he examined his reasons, they were simple. Today he’d felt a connection with her—a connection that was getting stronger each minute he was with her.
Seeing that the girls were occupied with eating, she pushed back her chair and came over to stand by him. “It’s really all right if you need me to stay. I don’t have any other commitments.”
“I don’t know how long this will go. The contractions are three and a half minutes apart, but this is her first baby. Anything can happen.”
“Tomorrow’s my day off. If you’re not back until late, I’ll just fall asleep on the couch.”
If he was late and if she fell asleep on his couch, something could happen that would startle her awake very fast.
He lowered his voice. “Have you ever heard of night terrors?”
She studied him. “They’re a type of children’s nightmare.”
“Yes, in a way. Though the child often doesn’t remember the nightmare after he or she wakes up. Courtney has them. I can’t let you stay without warning you about them. And if you don’t want to deal with that, I’ll have to find another doctor to cover for me.”
He fully expected her to be put off by the idea, to want to pick up her purse and leave. Instead, she said, “Explain to me what to do if Courtney has one. As long as I’m prepared, I can handle the situation.”
Jared was starting to realize that he’d examined Emily’s résumé, phoned her brief reference list and hired her, but he didn’t really know her.
Tonight, that could change. He wasn’t sure whether he should get to know Emily better…or not.
Chapter Two
Opening her eyes, Emily heard her name as if from a great distance.
“Emily, it’s midnight.”
The feel of Jared’s hand on her shoulder sent tingles throughout her body that brought her awake quickly.
Crouched down beside her, he wore scrubs and smelled as if he’d freshly showered. In fact, his hair was still damp. His muscled arm lay next to hers, almost touching it. His thigh muscles were obvious against the blue cotton fabric. Most of all, she noticed his eyes. They were so green, lighter at first, then more intense, more filled with—
Desire? She hadn’t seen desire in a man’s eyes for a very long time.
As he leaned closer, her anticipation was as rich as the hunger and need in his eyes. But then he stood and ran his hand over his brow.
She sat up but she didn’t want to get her purse and say good-night. She wanted to know if she was right about the vibrations between them.
She patted the sofa next to her. “You look beat. Decompress a little. Tell me about the birth.”
When he gazed at her, his eyes were filled with something she didn’t understand. Questions. What would he be questioning?
“You really want to hear?”
“Sure! Babies are our business. What’s most important to my pregnant moms is what kind of delivery they’ll have and if their baby will be healthy. I like to hear what happens after they leave my care.”
“I never thought of it that way. You don’t usually see the finished result.”
An ache enfolded her heart. She so missed seeing the finished result. “I go to the hospital nursery and take a peek. Sometimes the moms bring babies back to the office to visit after they’re born. But for the most part, I don’t know what happens after they leave me.”
“Tonight was a breeze for a first baby. Leanne’s contractions were two and a half minutes apart when I got there. Her husband was a great coach and she had good focus. By eleven thirty, she had a baby girl, and I was ready for a shower.”
“What do you feel when it happens?”
He appeared startled for a moment and then gave her a long assessing look. “No one has ever asked me that.”
She could see that was true and she wondered why. After all, that feeling was the reason she had delivered baby after baby as a midwife. That feeling was what made it all worthwhile.
He glanced down at his hands as if he was trying to relive the birth. The fatigue left his face. “It’s an unexplainable moment. It’s a moment when something you believe can’t possibly happen, does. It’s a moment when life is precious and men understand why they live and fight and die for what they hold dear.”
“It’s a moment,” she murmured, “when heaven meets earth.”
He studied her and she realized she’d said too much. She should tell him she knew firsthand all about that moment. Yet because of the lawsuit, he might not want her practicing with him. If she told him her history, this closeness she was feeling to him right now could simply vanish.
“You sound as if you know.”
“I’ve attended births.” She didn’t add that she was the one who had caught the baby in her hands.
His shoulder brushed hers as he admitted, “In that moment when a child is born, I forget the long hours and the hassles and the schedule shuffling. I guess most of life is that way. We work for the payoff, and if the payoff keeps us satisfied, we keep doing it.”
“It’s more than a payoff.” She remembered the feel of that little wet body in her hands…the eyes coming open…the first cry. How she missed it. How she wished she had the courage to go back and be part of delivering babies all over again.
Jared angled toward her. They were close enough to feel each other’s breath. “You really do understand.”
“I take care of moms and teach them how to take care of themselves for a reason.”
His large hand was so gentle as he stroked her cheek and pushed her curls away from her face. “I’ve never met anyone like you, Emily. Not everyone can understand the joy of holding a baby. You make what you do and what I do sound like more than a profession. You make it sound special and worthwhile.”
“It is.” She wanted to say more…she wanted to tell him that’s why she’d gone into women’s homes to help them have their babies there. She yearned to say that she’d
believed in home births because light and love and friendship could surround the newborn before, during and after the moment of birth. Yet she’d come to doubt that ideal. She’d come to doubt her judgment and skill. With those doubts lurking, she could never do it again. She’d be more prone to making a mistake. Mistakes were unacceptable when you were bringing a child into the world.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
She tried to blank her mind because he’d read it too well. “Nothing.”
“You looked lost for a moment.”
Not lost, she wanted to say. Not when I’m with you. But she couldn’t. It was too soon. The feelings were taboo. He was her boss.
Still, any thoughts of boss and employee, of too soon or not soon enough, evaporated as he leaned still closer. “Emily, I don’t know what it is about you.”
His lips were just a breath from brushing hers. “I don’t know what it is about you,” she whispered back.
His arm went around her, strong and protective. She nestled into it as if she belonged there…as if she belonged with him. When he tightened his embrace, his eyes were serious. But his mouth was curved in a small smile as if he were anticipating everything they were about to do.
She felt that same breath-hitching expectancy. The wait for his kiss was life-changing. In that moment, she put her divorce behind her. She took the present in her hands and hoped for a future that could include Jared. Her thoughts surprised her, almost as much as the touch of his lips on hers.
So many sensations bombarded her at once. The pressure of his lips was firm. The texture of his skin was taut and warm. The hunger behind his first touch was restrained, yet pulsing to be let loose. She readied herself for it. Then she realized, she couldn’t be ready for it.
As his mouth opened over hers, as he demanded a response, as she got lost, she couldn’t think about what she was doing. All she could do was give back whatever he asked. When his tongue stroked hers, she eagerly met each exploration. When he angled his head a little differently, her hands rose to his shoulders and then brushed into his hair. She held on to him so he could take her wherever he wanted to go.