Keep Jumping / No Hating Read online

  She continued, “Five dollars.”

  “I don’t have five dollars.”

  “You got anything? You must don’t wanna know where Alisha is then.”

  “Alisha? Who said my name?” my mom suddenly appeared from behind the house.

  I rushed over to her and grabbed the substance in her hand and threw it on the ground. She was trying to wrestle me, and people were fighting each other to get whatever I’d thrown out. It was mayhem, like twenty players on a football field scrambling to get a fumble.

  “Mom, it’s me. It’s Hallie,” I yelled, hoping that she would stop slapping me.

  “Baby girl, that’s you?” she said, coming out of her trance.

  “Yes, Mom. It’s me.”

  “Who is me? Oh, she look too good,” this one slick man said.

  He grabbed my mom and thrust his hand up her skirt. I was horrified.

  She turned around and said, “Boom Dog, not now! My baby girl came. Just not now.”

  Boom Dog said, “That’s your daughter? Dang, I didn’t know you could produce them like this. Wassup, Ms. Thang?”

  “Get on back, mister,” I said, wishing I was anywhere but here.

  “Boom Dog? Big Daddy Wayne? Where the heck was I?” I thought. Then I screamed, “Mom, you need to come with me. We need to go!”

  She put her hands between us. “Go where? I’m home, honey.”

  “And if you wanna help Mom pay the rent, why don’t you come home with me,” the nasty Boom Dog said and grabbed my shirt.

  “Get off of me,” I said, wishing I had a knife.

  “Not my baby, okay?” my mom defended.

  “What? All I need to do is get with her and I’ll clear you. I can put you in a room. I can talk to Big Daddy Wayne, and you’ll be straight. Let her pay your rent. Matter a fact, I’m sure he’d wanna get a piece of her too.”

  At that moment all I could think of was that whatever I was gonna have to do in my life, I wanted to earn an honest living. I would rather work at a fast food restaurant, mop the floors, cut grass, or anything that was hard labor before having no job and having to sell myself or my child to be able to eat or have a roof over my head. I wasn’t even aware of what was happening, but the guy called Boom Dog called over two other guys and they picked me up. They carried me to the backyard and started tugging at my clothes.

  Mom came around yelling and screaming with some of her other junkie friends. “Get off my child,” she screeched.

  I knew why my dad didn’t want me to find her. He didn’t want me to be a part of this. He didn’t want me in harm’s way. However, I had been determined to find her because I cared for her. I was doing it because I thought I could show her a better way. I was doing it because I thought she loved me enough to leave all of this behind. But she was in too deep. She couldn’t help herself much less help me. She started pulling off her clothes right in front of me. She told a couple of ladies I didn’t know to do the same.

  When the strong, thuggish men were distracted by all of the nudity, they let me go. My mom screamed out, “Run, Hallie, and don’t come back here, baby. Go! I don’t want you to see Mommy like this. I’m sorry, baby.”

  I wanted to go back and hug her, but the sight I saw made me vomit, and I hadn’t even eaten all day. Why did drugs have to mess up my mom’s life?

  When Boom Dog started coming back toward me, my mom cried out, “Hallie? Go! Just please go!”

  CHAPTER 5

  Highly Upset

  My life was spiraling out of control because I had just seen my naked mother offering her pathetically wasted body to some lowlife to save me from a terrible fate. That image would forever be seared in my memory, but I wanted to erase it completely from my brain. There was no way that I would ever be able do that. She looked dirty. She was skinny. She smelled. Her teeth were crumbling. She looked trashy, and she was selling her body to get a fix. It was too much. The only thing I knew to do was get drunk and hopefully forget it all. With shaky hands I dialed my girl Randal.

  “Where you guys going?” I asked bluntly.

  “Um, hello to you too,” Randal replied. “Eva said that senior running back Waxton is having a party. Come swing by his place. We’re on our way there.”

  “I called you!” Ella yelled out in the background.

  “Me too!” Charli said.

  “And don’t come dressed like a nun,” Eva added.

  I did not even care what I had on. I was not going home because my dad would be able to tell I was upset. Plus now that I knew my pops had a girlfriend, the last thing I wanted to do was go home unannounced. I told him I would be hanging out for the evening, and that was exactly what I was going to do. Once I got the directions, I headed over to Waxton’s house.

  The team was relaxing because it was a bye week, which meant we did not have a game. I hoped that the bye week would not halt our momentum because our team needed to tighten up on defense. Their secondary looked weak. If the opposing team was throwing long bombs left and right, we could not deflect them or intercept them. We needed new players or at least one.

  Amir had talent, but I was not even going to stress with the fact that he did not want to play. One thing I realized was people had to live their own lives. However, if I was taking his advice about tumbling and receiving his help to become a better gymnast, the least he could do was take my advice as well and play football.

  When I got there, I did not see my girls. Obviously, I had beaten them. They were probably in some nearby restaurant bathroom primping. I did not know what Waxton’s parents did or where they were, but they had an open bar downstairs. I walked right up to it and told a guy, who I recognized from school, to give me something strong.

  “Can I see your ID?” Pinecone had the nerve to ask me.

  I said with attitude, “Are you serious, Pinecone? Who in here is the right age?”

  Pinecone threw up his hands. “Dang! Chill, lil’ mama. I was just playing. Ease out, ease out! Here you go. You need something quick to take the edge off. What you do? Catch your man cheating?”

  “Nah, I caught my mom selling herself to her pimp for drugs,” I barked. I tossed back my drink.

  “Oh, dang. TMI, girlfriend. Too much information. For real, for real.” Pinecone frowned.

  I looked at the empty little glass. “Two more, please. And next time don’t ask me questions if you don’t want to know the answer.”

  He filled up that little glass and gave me another one. “You need two shots. Cut your mama some slack. That diamond around your neck cost money and had to be paid for.”

  I touched my necklace, and I thought about a happier time in my life when all was right in the world. I had just turned thirteen. The lovely solitaire was the gift my parents gave me. Why did things have to go all wild? Why did my mom have to lose her job? Why did my parents fall out of love with each other? Why, why, why? So many questions . . . no freaking answers.

  I lost track of how many shots I took, but I was feeling good. When Ella and Randal found me, I was out of it. Luckily, I could tell it was them.

  “Hey girls!” I slurred and promptly fell down.

  Ella caught me and said, “What is going on with you? Oh my gosh, your breath stinks! How many of these did you give her?” she asked Pinecone. He had a guilty look, but he was not saying nothing.

  Ella asked him again. Pinecone shrugged. She looked at me for an answer, but I laughed and shrugged. It was a happy world. I was so mellow.

  Randal said, “Hallie, why are you drinking like this? You’re a mess.”

  “If you’re going to be so high socially . . . I mean high senility . . . I mean high—”

  Randal interrupted, “High society.”

  Hugging her, I said, “Yeah, you knew what I was trying to say. Then get out of my face! Go, go . . .”

  At that moment, I saw Amir or a guy that looked like him talking to Lexus from Cheertowne. Amir was frowning. I bobbled my way over to them and cut into their conversation.

/>   “You, you . . . like him don’t you?” I said to her. “But he likes me . . .”

  “Hallie, you been drinking,” Amir said, clearly bummed out by my behavior.

  “Give this man a million dollars! You are correct, sir,” I said to him.

  Lexus said to him, “Ugh, and this is what you want? What does she have that I don’t have?”

  “Nothing, I have nothing that you don’t have. I have no mother. I have no mother. Did I say I have no mother?” And I fell toward Amir.

  Ella and Randal came up to him and Ella said, “Could you help us get our friend home?”

  “Amir, you just gonna leave? We’re talking,” Lexus said.

  I mouthed “Sorrrrry,” and then he said something to her and we headed outside. I passed by somebody who had a bottle. I grabbed it and chugged some more. When Amir saw me, he took it and threw the bottle away.

  “What are you doing?” he growled. “Why are you doing this to yourself? You’re too good to make stupid choices.”

  “I’m too stupid to make stupid choices says the man with all the baller potential who doesn’t want to get hit. You scared of getting hit, little baby?” I teased.

  I must have upset him because he backed away. Randal and Ella came up on both sides of me. “We got her,” Ella said. “Can you just follow us to her car?”

  “I also have my own car here,” he said.

  Ella rationalized, “Well, could you take her home, and we’ll follow you in her car? Then you could bring us back.”

  Amir nodded and Randal asked me, “Where are your keys, Hallie?”

  “Keys, what are keys?” I said to them.

  “Hallie, where are your car keys!” Ella demanded. She slapped my face lightly.

  Thinking I was sobering up, I overreacted and yelled, “Don’t hit my face! You remember my dad slapped me, and I didn’t like it then, so don’t slap my face now, okay? Just. Don’t.”

  Ella whispered, “Hallie, quit tripping! This guy likes you, and you are being so stupid.”

  “I don’t feel good,” I said.

  Amir said, “Well, you need to throw up right now because I don’t want any of that in my car. Talk about dads . . . mine would have a fit. Throw up right now.”

  “Don’t be so hard on her,” Ella said to Amir.

  Randal turned to Ella. “Let him handle her. He obviously cares.”

  “Yeah, but he doesn’t need to be so rough,” Ella fretted.

  Randal replied, “Whatever, you’re the one who just slapped her.”

  Ella said, “I was just trying to get her to wake up, and it wasn’t that hard.”

  I said, “I hear you guys talking and . . .”

  The next thing I knew, a whole bunch of stuff inside of me came out all over my girls’ feet. I could not even apologize because I felt so weak. My head was spinning like a top. I was done.

  “We’re going to wash off. You take her home. She lives right by the school.”

  “Let me see her license,” he requested.

  They went into my purse. Ella handed him my license. He plugged it into his GPS. He made sure I was fastened in, and then the two of us were off. I still felt wobbly. Every move he made felt like I was in a bumper car.

  “Could you slow down?” I huffed.

  “Could you not be drunk?” he fumed.

  “Why would you do this, Hallie? Why you get drunk like this? I don’t even know why I’m talking to you. You’re not even fully conscious right now.”

  “Not even fully conscious right now . . .” I mimicked back at him.

  Amir was upset with me, and I was upset with myself. But what was done was done. I wanted to feel better, but unfortunately I felt worse.

  “Amir, you naughty boy, get your hands out of my shirt,” I teased, completely intoxicated as Amir helped me out of his car.

  I am sure that he was the perfect gentleman, but it felt fun to play with him.

  He corrected, “Hallie, my hand is on your arm. Come on. I just want to confirm this is your house. This is what was on your driver’s license, but I don’t want to bring you to the wrong door. Is your dad going to be cool with me bringing you home?”

  “Oh, you got to kiss me. I want to get my dad back. I remember I came home and saw him with this lady. We could do the same thing. Come on, come on. Kiss me!” I said, as I puckered my lips and weaved in and out on my wobbly legs.

  I was trying to jump on Amir, but my balance was way off, and I completely missed his body. When I fell to the ground, he bent down to pull me up, and I yanked him down on top of me.

  “The ground’s all wet! Come on, Hallie, I don’t want to take you in your house all dirty. Hallie, stop playing,” Amir said in an irritated tone.

  “You don’t want to kiss me? You want to pick up where we left off? I know how to kiss now. I’m not going to bite your lip. What if you bite mine?” I thought that I had my flirt on.

  “Get up!” he said harshly.

  Suddenly, I heard a boom. Amir looked up and started panicking. It was then that I figured my daddy had come out and slammed the door shut behind him.

  My father rushed over to the two of us. “What is going on over here? Why is my daughter’s shirt practically open? And she’s drunk? Young man, who are you? I don’t believe this!” my dad said coldly, as he took me by the arm and pushed Amir back.

  “No, no, no, sir,” Amir said, putting his arms in the air. “You’ve got the wrong idea.”

  “The wrong idea,” my father yelled. “You bring my daughter home drunk, her clothes aren’t even put together, and you’re telling me I can’t make out what I see.”

  “Calm down, sir. Please, let me explain,” Amir said as calmly as he could. Lights started to pop on in the houses around the neighborhood.

  My dad was beyond pissed off. “Calm down? This is my child! Don’t tell me to calm down!”

  “Dad, why all the fussing? It’s a sun-shiny day. Wait, where’s the sun?” I said to the big full moon.

  “Hallie, go inside the house,” my dad screamed at me.

  “Aye, aye, captain,” I said with a salute.

  Amir continued pleading his case, “Sir, I’m not trying to offend you or be disrespectful. I was just trying to explain.”

  “Get off my property. Where’s my daughter’s car?” my father ranted.

  “Why are you yelling, Dad? You should have some of the shots I had. I’m so happy. I’m forgetting all about how I saw Mom at the crack house,” I blurted. Oops. I quickly put my hand over my mouth and laughed, knowing that I’d told my dad something I should have kept to myself.

  “You what? Where have you been, Hallie? And where’s your car? Please tell me you weren’t drinking and driving.”

  Ella and Randal pulled up at that moment. I pointed to my ride. I was smiling again because in my intoxicated brain, all was right with the world.

  I whispered, “Dad, I like him. No fussing at the guy.” Then I started crying. “Dad, if you hit him like you hit me, he’ll never come back.”

  “Hallie, get yourself together, girl!” my father beseeched.

  Ella could tell there was drama, so she cut in, “Mr. Ray, let us explain. This is not Amir’s fault. We asked him to bring Hallie home.”

  “Why is she drunk?” my father demanded.

  “When we got to the party, she was already trashed,” Ella confessed, sending me a contrite look.

  Again I smiled. At that moment I really had no clue she was getting me deeper in trouble. But Randal did, and she hit Ella in the arm.

  Realizing she wasn’t helping the situation, Ella said, “Sir, I mean, she had something to drink. We got her out of there immediately. We knew that since we needed to get her car home, we could ask Amir to help. He is a guy from our junior class, and he is a responsible driver—”

  “How do you know he’s a responsible driver? You ever seen him drive before?” my father grilled her.

  Ella pitifully tried explaining, “Well, it’s just that—”


  My dad cut her off and said, “Okay, save it.”

  Amir was frustrated too. “Sir, I got your daughter home in one piece. I promise you, I had nothing to do with her drinking. I don’t support it. I told her it was wrong.”

  “Still doesn’t explain her clothes practically off her body. Just go.” My dad pointed toward the street and off our lot.

  “No, Amir, don’t go,” I begged.

  “Hallie, what are you doing?” my dad asked. “Ella, Randal, y’all get her in the house right now.”

  My girls pulled me away. My father said more harsh words to Amir. Amir turned back around, stood there, and took it. My girls led me to the door.

  Randal said, “He was supposed to take us back to the party, but now . . .”

  “Just get her inside,” Ella said. “We’ll have to call Charli. She’ll swing through and pick us up.”

  Limp as a cooked piece of spaghetti, I said, “I’m sorry, y’all. I’m so sorry. Y’all love me, don’t you? Kisses, kisses . . .”

  “Hallie, you know you’re going to be grounded forever,” Ella said to me with a quick shake of her head.

  “And if you throw up on our feet again . . .,” Randal threatened. “You’re dad won’t have to kill you, because I will.”

  Ella said, “Right, that was gross, Hallie.”

  “I threw up on your feet? Oh y’all, I’m sorry,” I said breathlessly.

  Randal said she was going to the kitchen to get me a glass of water. Water was probably a good idea because I felt my heart start racing.

  I squealed, “Ella, you got to get my dad. I think I’m going to die. My chest, it hurts really bad!”

  Ella shouted, “Randal hurry up with the water! This happened to Eva a couple of times. When you drink too much alcohol too fast sometimes it does weird things. That’s why you need to lay off the bottle, girl. You know you can’t handle anything, much less two or three or four shots of who knows what Pinecone had you drinking.”

  “I know, right? That bartender liked me. Do you think Amir hates me?” I asked with fingers crossed.

  “Girl, he is so cute, but you took that boy through a whole bunch of drama. I don’t know if he’s ever going to talk to you again,” Ella laughed.