Promises of Tomorrow Read online

  “Oh, gut! You figured it out,” Katie said as she entered the room.

  “I’m a college student. Knowing how to make coffee in any situation is almost a prerequisite,” Beth joked.

  “I bet.” Katie walked over to the oven. “Ah, it’s heated up at last.” She opened a large cooler and pulled out a casserole dish. “Open the oven for me, will ya, Beth?”

  She did as Katie asked. “What’s that?”

  “Oven French toast. I make it all the time at my bed-and-breakfast.”

  “It’s amazing,” Kendra said as she turned off the burner on the stove. “I hope this is enough.”

  There had to be at least two pounds of bacon on the plate. “You all sure know how to eat.”

  Katie giggled. “Today is our big eating day. We’ll start out with a big breakfast, then end it with a turkey dinner.”

  Beth eyed the giant bird with some misgiving. “So you really are going to cook a turkey today?”

  “Oh, for sure,” Kendra said. “Everyone else made side dishes before they got here, but we elected not to cook the turkey beforehand. There’s something about the smell of roasting turkey that makes a gathering feel like a holiday. Ain’t so?”

  “Um, yes?”

  “If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re in good company,” Tricia called out as she and E.A. joined them. “Kendra always does more than expected.”

  Kendra frowned. “Nee, that’s not true.”

  “It kind of is,” E.A. said. “But we love you anyway, Kendra.” Turning to the coffeemaker, she grinned. “Ah, kaffi!”

  That pronouncement seemed to work like the chiming of a bell, and Nate and Harley walked in.

  Deciding to be useful, Beth found milk, sugar, and paper cups and became the unofficial barista. When the first pot was empty, she made another one on its heels, chatting with everyone about college, the breakfast, and the likelihood of Kendra’s turkey turning out in the cabin’s oven.

  Later, she stood in line with the rest of the group and helped herself to the French toast, bacon, and some of the fruit salad that E.A. had brought from home.

  Just as Will and Logan started gathering all the trash, Katie looked around the room. “Wait, where’s Marie?”

  “She wasn’t feeling too well this morning,” John said. “I told her to take her time getting out of bed.”

  E.A. got to her feet. “What’s wrong? Is she sick?”

  John looked down at his feet. “Nee, just, um, a little tired. That’s all. I brought her some crackers.”

  “Crackers? She didn’t want anything more?” Kendra asked.

  “Nee,” John replied. “She said she was still full from last night.”

  Thinking that his excuses didn’t make much sense at all, Beth looked from one person to the next. They also looked skeptical… though a couple of the women were smiling too.

  Kendra cleared her throat. “Well, since Marie is um, really tired, Beth, how about Nate and I take you to your cabin to get your things?”

  She blinked, trying to keep up with the sudden change of topic. “But I’m not sure where it is.”

  “You gave us some hints, though,” Nate said. “Besides, we’re going to have to find it sooner or later.”

  “Now that it has stopped snowing, it’s a beautiful day,” Kendra added. “Cool and crisp. At the very least, we’ll have a nice walk.”

  “I’ll join you too,” said Tricia. “It will be fun.”

  Beth couldn’t think of a thing to say except what was in her heart. “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”

  Kendra stood up. “Let’s go in about an hour. I’ve got to get that turkey in first, jah?”

  “We all went into the living room and ate on the floor.

  “I had on Christmas music, and muted Christmas movies were playing on the TV. It was fun and easy, and because we hadn’t gotten together in weeks, I’m afraid the eight of us ignored some of the other people for a bit.

  “No one seemed to mind—except for Stephanie.”

  Before long, they were on their way. Marie had come out of her room, smelled bacon, and ran to the bathroom. John followed, Katie right behind.

  Beth might have been the youngest person in the group, but even she had a pretty good idea about what was wrong with Marie. She sure wasn’t going to be the one to say it, though!

  Less than an hour later, the turkey was in the oven and the four of them were on their way.

  “I’m not so sure about this,” Beth admitted to Kendra, Tricia, and Nate as they started walking through the woods. “What if I get all of us lost?”

  “I have an excellent sense of direction,” Nate replied. “We’ll be fine. There’s no way we’ll get lost trying to find our way back.”

  Kendra groaned. “Is that right, Nathan?”

  “Well, I not only have a good sense of direction… but I also brought these,” he said as he pulled a wad of torn white strips from his pocket. “I’m going to tie these on branches as we go.”

  Tricia chuckled. “Is that from an undershirt?”

  “Jah. Maybe.”

  He was holding about twenty three-inch strips of white fabric, simple but ingenious. Thinking of all the time and worry she could have saved yesterday, Beth murmured, “I wish I would have thought of that.”

  “Now, don’t go second-guessing yourself,” Kendra said. “If you had found your way to and fro, you would still be alone. And that would have been a mighty sad thing, indeed.”

  “She’s right,” Tricia said. “We’re glad you joined us.”

  Sometimes Beth felt like pinching herself. Never before had she been around a group of friends who lifted one another up so much. She’d had lots of good friends back in high school, but all of them had been like her… intent on pursuing their own dreams. This group seemed to be constantly looking out for one another.

  “Hey, did I hurt your feelings?” Kendra asked.

  “Oh, no. I was just thinking of how each of you is so positive. You are this perfect group of friends.”

  “We’re not perfect,” Tricia said.

  “Not at all,” Nate added as he stopped to tie another strip of cloth on a tree. “We’ve all made our fair share of mistakes over the years. I, for one, have made quite a few.”

  Looking serious, Kendra nodded. “Nate is right. I tried to be English for a couple of years in my late teens. It’s a long story, but I was struggling so much, I ended up in rehab.”

  “But you’re Amish.” Realizing how that sounded, Beth held up a hand. “I’m sorry.”

  Kendra shook her head as they continued to walk through the trees, pausing every couple of feet. “No, no need to be sorry at all. My past is unexpected, I know it. But in other ways, I feel that my path to redemption and happiness is more inspiring. No one has a perfect life, true?”

  “True.”

  Looking fondly at her husband, Kendra said, “Now, I am glad I went through all that I did. It made me stronger and braver. And, in some ways, more content. See, I know what it feels like to be in a very dark place. Now, even the most boring or aggravating days feel easy by comparison.”

  “That’s why you became Amish?”

  “I grew up Amish, left for a while, then got baptized after I found my way back.”

  Those last words resonated with Beth. Was that what she was doing now? Attempting to find her way back to herself and her future after being lost both literally and figuratively?

  Kendra had given her a lot to think about, and she was content to dwell on her words and the last couple of months while they walked in silence, the snow-covered leaves and pine needles crunching under their feet.

  Emerald evergreens with thick blankets of snow on their branches nestled against the bare oaks and maples. A few squirrels scampered around, and a stray cardinal or two chirped as a lone hawk circled overhead. The air was cold and crisp, but Beth was warm enough, thanks to Marie’s down coat.

  As they stopped so Nate could tie another strip of cotton around
a tree branch, he peered into the distance.

  “When the driver was taking us to our cabin, he told us there was a group of other, even more rustic cabins to the east, about a mile out. Do you recall seeing any other cabins when you drove in?”

  She’d been in such a daze, but Beth tried to recall how she’d made her way to the cabin. Suddenly she remembered a few details. “The cabin was near a really small pond that was iced over and it was within sight of two other shacks that looked to be in about the same condition as mine.”

  Even though she wasn’t able to give much information, Nate nodded like she’d given him the exact street names. “That’s gut, Beth. That means we’re on the right track.” He pointed to their right. “I could be mistaken, but it looks like the trees might thin out about fifty yards or so from here. Let’s go see what we can see.”

  “I really appreciate the three of you doing this with me.”

  “Beth, you need your car and your things,” Kendra said. “We can’t simply leave them near an abandoned shack. Someone could steal them. Besides, you were going to have to come back eventually.”

  “You’re right.” Hoping she sounded more positive than she felt, Beth smiled. “Let’s go.”

  Sure enough, after they’d gone that fifty yards, the trees did seem to thin out. Where before, all she could see were trees and branches and snow, now they could see quite a bit more. Off to the right was a frozen pond. Just beyond that was a wide field. Five or six deer were slowly making their way across it.

  “Anything look familiar?” Tricia asked.

  Had she seen that pond before? She wasn’t sure. She wasn’t even sure about the clearing. She’d seen more than one grouping of deer, but they could obviously have been anywhere. “Unfortunately, no.”

  Nate tied another piece of fabric to a tree, then started walking again. “The land rises a little farther up. Let’s keep going, then.”

  The snow was thicker in places, which made the slight incline more difficult. Beth had to stop a few times to catch her breath. The others stopped with her, though she noticed that they didn’t seem to be finding the exercise as difficult as she did. It was another reminder of how little she’d done since Joel had gotten sick.

  She’d slept and cried and curled up inside herself, practically daring the rest of the world to come in. Though she knew she had nothing to feel bad about, she was coming to realize that those weeks hadn’t done her any favors either. Now that she was hiking in the woods, she felt cool, clean air fill her lungs and a new hope fill her heart.

  She would still be grieving. She knew that. But she was starting to see that there wasn’t only one way to honor someone’s life. Grief wasn’t an easy task or a simple one.

  Just as importantly, she knew that Joel would never have wanted her to retreat from the rest of the world in some kind of misguided effort to honor his memory.

  “What do you think, Beth?” Kendra said.

  “I think I need to hike more,” she blurted before realizing that Kendra was looking at the horizon. “Oh! I don’t know… wait!” she exclaimed as she saw a red sedan. “That’s my car.”

  “We found it! Good for you, Beth,” Tricia exclaimed as she held up her fist for a bump.

  Touching her fist to Tricia’s, Beth’s first thought was that it was so strange to be doing something like that with a woman wearing a kapp and bonnet. Then she was reminded of everything she’d seen during their walk and she realized the truth. Everything—good, bad, in-between—was more than it seemed. Always, always more than it seemed.

  She would do good to remember that.

  “Before even an hour had gone by, Stephanie wanted to leave. I could tell Andy was put out with her, but all he did was ask if we could go ahead and start exchanging gifts.

  “We drew numbers and then picked a gift bag out of the bin. Will’s present, being the biggest, was chosen first. And wouldn’t you know it? Andy had gotten number one.

  “Right in front of us all, he set his plate on the floor, lifted out the tissue, and then kind of yelped as Will’s critters leapt toward him.”

  Will spoke. “The guinea pigs were really happy to be set free, you see.”

  “One could say that they were too happy, Will,” Marie retorted.

  Kendra was glad to see Beth’s mood improve as they made their way over to her car. She’d never tell her, but Kendra had been plenty doubtful about how successful their journey was going to be. She’d even told Nate that morning that she was worried about the three of them getting lost in the woods.

  Instead of teasing her, Nate had simply pulled out one of his older undershirts and started making strips for them to tie onto tree branches. But that was Nate now. He put her needs first and never ignored her insecurities. She, in turn, had begun to open up more and stopped hoping he would read her mind.

  They’d come a long way. Now all she had to do was hope that their first Christmas as a married couple would go as well as she hoped. And that her sister Mary would show up like she’d promised.

  As they continued to hike down the hill, this time with Beth and Tricia leading the way, Nate stayed by her side.

  “Are you worried about the spiders?” he teased. “If so, you can stay outside.”

  “I do hate spiders, that’s true. But I’m still thinking about Mary and Christmas.”

  “Everything in our home is ready for her. We’ve even bought the biggest ham in the state for supper. It’s going to be fine.”

  “It’s not that big, Nate. Besides, it’s just as easy to brine and glaze a big ham as a small one.”

  “You may be right… but I’m just saying that it’s more than enough for you, me, your sisters, and my family.” He frowned. “We’ll be having leftovers for weeks.”

  “Nate—” She stopped herself just in time. “Oh, you. You’re trying to get me spun up, aren’t ya?”

  The fine lines around his eyes crinkled slightly. “Maybe. But it worked, jah?”

  “It did. So, I guess all that means you don’t think I should be worrying about making a perfect meal for everyone?”

  “Maybe,” he replied. “It means, I’m sure everything you make will be tasty, but even if it isn’t, we’re still going to have a great time. Christmas is going to be wonderful, Kendra. We have each other and a whole future ahead of us. My family loves you, and I love you too. That’s what matters, ain’t so?”

  Feeling foolish, she nodded. “Jah. Being all together is what matters most. I’ll keep reminding myself of that.”

  “Good.” As they stopped beside Beth’s jaunty red sedan, Nate whistled low. “I’m impressed you spent a night in this place, Beth. It looks like a good wind could blow it down in a heartbeat.”

  “It sure sounded like it was about to.” She peered in one of the windows that faced the front. “Hey, I see my computer. I guess no one’s been around here since I left.” She held out her key. “I’ll unlock the door.”

  They stood to the side as Beth inserted the key, jiggled the lock, and then finally clicked open the handle. “Um, I’ll be right out.”

  “I’ll go with you,” Tricia said.

  “Hold on there. I’ll go in with you too,” Nate said. “Kendra, do you two want to wait out here for us?”

  Yes. Yes, she did. But Beth had enough on her plate without worrying about their feelings or being even more of an inconvenience than she saw herself being. “No way. I want to come inside too,” she said.

  Nate rolled his eyes, but Beth smiled at her, which meant everything—right until she walked right into a spiderweb. “Oh!”

  “They really are everywhere, Kendra,” Beth said. “I didn’t lie.”

  “No, you most certainly did not. I’ll, um, wait here.”

  “I’ll be fast. I didn’t unpack much,” Beth told Tricia as they walked toward the bathroom, presumably to pack up her toiletries.

  Kendra sat on an arm of the couch and looked around the room. She decorated spaces for a living, but honestly, she had no i
dea how to make this place much better. One would have to tear the whole thing down and start from scratch, if that was even possible.

  But, maybe… She walked to the kitchen, just to get an idea about the appliance and countertop situation. That’s when she saw a FOR SALE sign on the countertop. It was for sale, and for a song too.

  Immediately, she switched gears and started dreaming about making an offer on it, then remodeling the building. If she took it down to the studs, added insulation and fresh Sheetrock, why, it wouldn’t be half bad. And then the Eight could have someplace to stay every now and then.

  And perhaps even once a year, they could all come back here with kinner in their arms. The cramped space wouldn’t be so bad if they were all with friends, would it?

  “Uh-oh, you’ve got that look in your eye,” Nate said.

  Unable to help herself, she picked up the flyer and showed it to him. “Wouldn’t this be perfect for us all?”

  “I’m not so sure about that. This place is a mess.”

  “But what if we all went in on this together? It wouldn’t be that much.”

  “But everyone would have to agree to it.” Holding up the flyer with one hand, he gestured with the other. “Plus, this place is going to need a lot of work. Why, just these countertops and faucets alone would be a couple hundred dollars.”

  “But we know someone who has a hardware store and can get everything at a discount,” she said, looking right at him. “And we also know someone who has a remodeling company. Harley is super handy.”

  “But how would we even begin to negotiate such a thing?”

  “Marie works at a bank. She could help us.”

  He chuckled. “You have all the answers, don’t you?”

  “No. But I do have hope. That’s what we would need the most of, don’t you think?” She couldn’t explain it, but all of a sudden, she knew that buying this little cabin was going to be just what they needed to ensure that they would always have a connection. As far as she was concerned, owning a piece of real estate together would guarantee they wouldn’t drift apart again.