An Amish Family Christmas Read online

  Map

  Dedication

  To Alex, the newest member of our family

  Acknowledgments

  As I finish up this novel, I wanted to be sure to thank some of the many people who have helped me make this Charmed Amish Life Series the best that it could be.

  First off are Lynne and Laurie. Thank you to “Team L&L” for driving with me to Charm and exploring the area. No fried-pie tasting would be complete without you! Thank you both for the thousand things y’all do to help make my writing life go smoothly. Thank you for being so patient and fun, too. Y’all are awesome. Really!

  Thank you to the whole team at HarperCollins and Avon Books! No author could be more spoiled! I am grateful for the beautiful covers, the marketing and sales teams, the enthusiasm, and most of all for their kindness to me. I owe Amelia Wood and Maria Silva special thanks for jumping on board with the marketing and publicity for this series. Both of these ladies are so smart and talented! Thank you, also, to editor Chelsey Emmelhainz for planning out this series with me (and listening patiently while I continually chatted about all things Amish and Charm) and to the lovely Erika Tsang, who has recently adopted me. I’m grateful for all of you!

  I owe a big thanks to everyone at the Seymour Agency, and most especially Nicole Resciniti. Nicole, thank you for being there for me in hundreds of ways this year. I’ve been humbled and honored to call you my agent.

  Writing four books a year means I work a lot, and I’m so grateful for my husband, Tom. He takes care of everything (everything except laundry!). He not only understands when I have to work long hours, but also notifies me when it’s time for a break.

  Finally, I want to give thanks to the Lord for helping me write each page. I am so grateful I don’t have to write these books on my own. I’m blessed.

  Epigraph

  Will you rejoice in the birth of the King?

  Or just in the things Christmas will bring?

  AMISH PROVERB

  “What do you mean, ‘if I can?’ Jesus asked.

  “Anything is possible if a person believes.”

  MARK 9:23

  Contents

  Map

  Dedication

  Acknowledgments

  Epigraph

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  P.S. Insights, Interviews & More . . .* About the author

  About the book

  Read on

  Also by Shelley Shepard Gray

  Credits

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  Chapter 1

  December 3

  Momma, it’s cold.”

  “It is, for sure,” Julia Kemp murmured to her daughter. Frustrated, she jiggled the handle of her front door for about the fifteenth time. Standing on her porch, she debated about whether or not to dump out the contents of her purse and tote bag. Again.

  The temperature had to be hovering around the twenty-degree mark. Far too cold for a five-year-old to be outside for any length of time. Then, of course, there was the foot of snow that had fallen over the last two days. While it was beautiful, it also seemed to keep the moisture firmly in the air. Now it felt even colder than it actually was.

  Feeling both helpless and annoyed with herself, Julia pulled off her black cardigan and slipped it around Penny’s little body. “There you are, dear. Better?”

  Penny bit her lip but nodded bravely. She was already snuggled in Julia’s coat and her own cloak, kapp, and black bonnet. Actually, she was a little hard to see, nestled in the pile of clothes like a newborn pup.

  But now that she had her mother’s sweater tucked securely around her, Penny had to be all right. It was most likely the situation they were in that was making her feel so chilled and scared.

  And who could blame her? They were locked out of their house at eight at night on December third. There was snow on the ground, not a streetlight to be seen, and everyone around them was a virtual stranger. Nothing about their current situation was okay.

  Somehow, some way, she’d lost her house keys. How could she do something so stupid? So dumb?

  Just as that old familiar sinking feeling of unworthiness started to threaten her very being, she shook her head. No, she was not going to do this to herself again.

  She was not going to put herself down like Luther used to do. She was not stupid. She was not dumb. She’d merely made a mistake, that was all. People made mistakes all the time.

  But as the wind blew and the bitter cold seeped through the wool fabric of her dress, Julia knew it was time to face the inevitable. She didn’t know any of her neighbors well enough to feel like she could ask for help, especially when it meant that she would have to ask Penny to trudge up and down a dark street in the snow. She was going to have to break into her house tonight. Penny needed to get into bed and get her rest. She had school tomorrow.

  There was no other choice.

  Hoping she sounded more optimistic than she felt, Julia knelt down and pressed her lips to her sweet girl’s soft cheek. “Penny, I’m going to need to look around the yard for a rock. You stay here, okay?”

  “Why do ya need a rock?”

  “Because I’m going to have to break one of the windows so we can get inside the house.”

  Caramel-colored eyes that matched her own gazed at her solemnly. “Okay, Momma.”

  That was how her little girl answered her most all the time now. She accepted whatever Julia told her without a fuss. And no matter what happened, she tried to keep up a brave front.

  Tears pricked Julia’s eyes as she stepped off the front porch and wandered into her small front lawn. She had no idea where she was going to find a rock under all the snow in the dark, but she had to try.

  She was not going to think about how one went about getting a new windowpane or how much it was going to cost. Or how her small bank account was going to be able to pay for it. All she needed to do was take things one day at a time. Or, in this case, one hour at a time.

  She could do this. She had been making do for the last six years, ever since she’d allowed Luther liberties he shouldn’t have taken and then discovered the consequences.

  Still remembering that awful afternoon, she shivered. She’d been scared but hopeful that Luther would eventually be the kind man to her in private that he was to her family in public. Instead, he’d called her terrible names and hit her. When she realized she was pregnant, she knew he would never let her go. Instead of facing her parents and confessing everything, she ran. She’d been too embarrassed to admit her many faults, especially since her sister Sarah had done everything right.

  In addition, her parents didn’t believe in conflict or dissent. Julia had been sure that they would have been upset that she’d slept with a man she didn’t want to marry. Maybe even upset enough to force her to stay by Luther’s side.

  Letting those fears consume her, she’d hired a driver to take her from Middlefield to Cleveland. Then, after spending the night in a scary motel near the downtown bus s
tation, she boarded a bus bound for Millersburg.

  By the time she’d walked into a small, quaint-looking motel just off the highway that had a Help Wanted sign in the front window, she’d had a new identity.

  She was Julia Kemp, widow. Her husband had been killed in a construction accident, and she’d moved to Ohio to start over on her own. The baby she was expecting was a blessing.

  And her swollen eye? She’d tripped while managing her suitcase in the bus station.

  Jared and Connie Knepp, owners of the motel, had accepted her sad story without blinking an eye. And Julia had gotten a small room the size of a large closet and a job cleaning rooms. For almost six years she’d worked there, raising her baby and cleaning after travelers. She’d kept to herself and saved every penny.

  When the Knepps closed their motel, Julia decided to start fresh. She moved to Charm, rented a ramshackle house that needed some care, and got a job at a fabric and notion store. Days after that, she enrolled Penny in a lovely little Amish school within walking distance.

  She’d hoped everything was going to be wonderful. But so far, Julia had met one obstacle after another. Her bills were hard to manage. Taking care of a whole house instead of one tiny motel room was a challenge, too.

  She’d get through it, though. She had to. She had no choice but to do anything she could in order to survive.

  As she tromped through the snow, she smiled grimly to herself. That, at least, was something she was good at. She’d had a lot of practice surviving. It turned out she would do whatever it took, even lying about her past and taking a new name, if it meant she could take care of Penny.

  She was simply going to have to keep doing that. No matter what happened.

  AS ANOTHER FIERCE burst of wind blasted his cheeks, Levi Kinsinger pulled his black knit hat a little lower across his brow.

  Stuffing his hands in the pockets of his black coat, he reflected that he shouldn’t have worked so late. There was no reason for him to be working past seven at night. Nothing was going on at the lumber mill that couldn’t be taken care of tomorrow. He shouldn’t have lost track of time.

  No, that wasn’t true. He’d known it was late. He just hadn’t been in any hurry to go back to his house.

  And it was definitely a house, not a home.

  The fact was, he hated the house he was currently living in. He didn’t like its size, the way it was run-down and unkempt, or the fact that strangers had built it.

  Furthermore, he didn’t like living alone, and he didn’t like being within calling distance to the five or six other houses that looked exactly like his own.

  Being there was his own fault, of course. When he’d returned home after taking a leave of absence, he’d felt out of sorts. It was probably to be expected. After all, his three siblings had continued their lives while he was still attempting to come to terms with their father’s death. While he’d been working construction in the Florida heat, his brother and sisters had moved forward. His older brother, Lukas, had married. So had his sister Rebecca. Now his other sister, Amelia, was practically engaged to Simon Hochstetler.

  Yep, all three of his siblings were in various stages of wedded bliss. They were all smiles and full of happy futures. Then, when Lukas and his wife, Darla, announced just before Thanksgiving that they were expecting a baby, Levi felt even more at odds with the rest of them.

  He didn’t know why, either. He’d prayed for guidance, prayed for understanding, too. But no matter how hard he prayed, he still felt empty inside. So empty that he didn’t trust himself to be around his siblings for any length of time. The last thing they needed was for his unhappiness to rub off on them.

  Claiming that Lukas and Darla needed to enjoy a little bit of privacy, Levi signed a year lease on a small rental house just south of the mill. Within a week, he’d moved into the drab little place. Though Lukas had asked him several times not to move, Levi’s stubbornness had come into play. He’d made his decision and he was going to stand by it, no matter how much he regretted it.

  No matter how much he hated the rental with its chipping paint, dirty woodwork, and scarred floors, he knew he’d never tell his siblings that he wasn’t happy living in his new place. They didn’t need one more thing to worry about.

  Actually, he was starting to wonder that same thing. He’d taken to praying to the Lord for guidance. He needed to be the man his father had hoped for him to be, the sooner the better.

  All of that was why he was walking home in the cold and in the dark. Because he didn’t have any place else to go but work or his house on this dreary little street filled with people who no doubt wished they were living somewhere else, too.

  As he walked down Jupiter Street, Levi shook his head. If his father was still alive, he would be shaking his head in shame. Levi needed to get a better attitude. There was not a thing wrong with the houses on Jupiter or the people who lived in them.

  Most of the men and women who lived here seemed nice enough. They were hardworking and cordial, if all a bit worn down by life.

  It wasn’t their fault that their houses and their yards reflected that same attitude. When one worked all the time, trying to make ends meet, one didn’t have a lot of time to devote to yard work or painting. Or repair work. It was simply the way it was.

  As another gust of wind swept down the street, he braced himself, then increased his pace. At least he’d gone to the grocery store on Saturday and bought a bunch of popcorn, canned soup, and roast beef. He’d make himself a fire and some supper and sit down in his small living room to enjoy it.

  Sure, it wasn’t going to be the same as one of Amelia’s fine meals eaten at the large and well-worn dining room table surrounded by whoever was in the house. But it would do. It would have to—

  The direction of his thoughts drew to an abrupt stop when he noticed his neighbor from across the street crawling on her hands and knees near the mailbox.

  What in the world?

  When he got close, she froze. Though it was dark, he could just make out her panicked features, thanks to a bright moon and one of the neighbors’ lit windows. Light-brown eyes. Golden hair. Diamond-shaped face. And the prettiest pair of pale-pink lips he’d ever seen.

  Lips that were currently parted as she gaped at him.

  Worried, he stopped. “Hey. It’s Julia, jah?” When she nodded but said nothing, he knelt down to meet her gaze. “What are you doing out here in the dark?”

  “Well, to be honest . . . I’m looking for a rock,” she replied. As if rock hunting in the dark winter cold was the most natural thing to do in the world.

  It was then that he realized she wasn’t wearing a coat. Or a sweater. There were also tears in her eyes. And though he’d already known something was wrong, now he knew for sure that something was terribly amiss.

  Though he didn’t know her hardly at all, he had observed her from time to time. He’d always thought of her as rather calm and peaceful. Never had he seen her acting so flustered. “Any special reason you are needing a rock tonight?” he asked gently.

  Leaning back on her haunches, she nodded. “I did something st— I mean silly. I locked myself and Penny out of my house.” Her voice thickened with emotion. “I canna find my keys, and I’ve looked in my purse and pockets at least three times. I need to break a window.”

  As her words permeated, something happened inside of him. He couldn’t bring his father back. He couldn’t fit in with his siblings like he wanted to. He wasn’t even sure what his future entailed.

  But he was a capable man, and he’d worked in a hardware store and lumber mill all of his life. If there was one thing he could do, it was break into a house.

  Standing up, he held out his hand for her to take. “I can help you with that.”

  She stared at him, wide-eyed. “You think so?”

  “I know so.” Since she hadn’t taken his hand yet, he bent toward her a little closer. “Here, let me help you up.”

  After the briefest hesitation, she tent
atively placed one bared hand in his. It was small and slim. Delicate against his work-roughened palms. “Danke,” she whispered.

  And that was when he realized what had just happened. She believed him. Believed in him. Completely.

  It was such a positive sensation, so much better than the usual burdens of regrets he’d been carrying around since his father’s death. It had been so hard to grieve for a parent all over again. Even harder when he’d realized that just like with his mamm, he’d never taken the time to tell his father how much he loved him.

  For the first time in weeks, Levi felt like himself again.

  “You’re welcome,” he said, smiling even though she couldn’t see his expression. “I’m happy to be of help.”

  Chapter 2

  December 3

  Of all the people on her street, Julia couldn’t believe that he was the person who came to her rescue.

  She knew who he was, of course. She’d figured that out by the second week she was in Charm. It seemed everyone knew who Levi Kinsinger was—and they didn’t mind gossiping about him, either. Levi was the handsome, headstrong younger son of the wealthiest family in the county. He and his three siblings owned one of the biggest lumber mills in the whole state of Ohio. He was also shrouded by all of the tragedy that the Kinsinger family had incurred over the last decade. First, their mother had died unexpectedly early, leaving their oldest daughter to look after her youngest siblings as best she could while their father grieved and operated the mill. Then, just last year, their father had also been taken to Heaven. He, along with four other workers, had died in a suspicious fire at the mill.

  Then there were the other, more lurid stories that were told about him. Whispered stories about Levi’s streak of wildness during his rumspringa. His flirting with practically every girl in the county. The way he enjoyed a good joke and never took much very seriously. Those stories had been told with a bit of condemnation mixed with a healthy amount of fondness.

  It seemed no one could find it in their hearts to hold Levi Kinsinger to the same standards that everyone else had to aspire to.