By Charm or by Choice Read online

  “And what if I never gain a competency in either?”

  “What—Mary, why would you ask such a question?”

  Mary and Kitty looked at each and remained quiet.

  “Girls, please tell me what is concerning you. We only want to help you have a say in your own futures. Please tell me why you seem so uncertain about this.”

  “Lydia, it was Lydia. She told us that you would try to make us boring and proud, like Mr. Darcy. And then you would choose our husbands and they would be repulsive!” Mary’s voice cracked as tears began to appear again.

  Elizabeth was incensed, but reached out to her sister at once and held her tongue. She soothed Mary with quiet words of comfort and she motioned to Kitty to join her hands with them.

  “Mary, Kitty, I am so sorry that you have concerns about your futures and feel that you have little say in what happens to you. Fitzwilliam and I have no desire to choose your husbands. Would you really think so? You saw my reaction when Mama tried to force me to marry Mr. Collins. To my certain knowledge the prospect of being forced to marry a man you hold in no regard is repugnant to every proper feeling! Providing you with dowries is not an exchange for the privilege of choosing your husbands. The only condition attached to your dowries is proper conduct. Lydia’s conduct was certainly not proper. If Wickham had asked to call upon Lydia, and then to court her, and then for her hand in marriage, he would be on very different footing with Papa, Fitzwilliam, and I. But he didn’t do any of those things. Instead, he asked her to run off with him, at night, and without a chaperone. And Lydia was agreeable to all of this! Her letter to Mrs. Forster said they were going to Gretna Green, but once those plans fell, she left no word for her family as to where they were or where they were going. And then they lived together, whilst unmarried, in London for a fortnight! She put our entire family’s future in danger with her imprudent behavior. She put your future prospects in danger. With the help of Fitzwilliam, his cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam, Uncle Gardiner, and Papa, a scandal was avoided. But Lydia will be living the consequences of her actions for the entirety of her marriage, and possibly the rest of her life, as her husband is a man of very low character.”

  Mary and Kitty looked very subdued and were paying very close attention. They saw that her whole heart was in the subject.

  “The only condition for paying for your education and instruction is that the subject must be something of interest to you. There are many subjects to choose from! But YOUR interest should be our guide. There is drawing, music, calligraphy, embroidery, dancing, writing, literature, and others I haven’t even considered. It is a wonderful opportunity for you both!”

  Being more at ease with Elizabeth’s reassurances, Kitty revealed that she was interested in drawing and learning French. She felt it was too late to begin learning the pianoforte at her age. Elizabeth complimented her on her astuteness. Mary shared that she would like instruction from a Master on the pianoforte so she could improve as Elizabeth had done. And she wanted to study literature as well.

  “I think that those are wonderful choices! Fitzwilliam will go about hiring your instructors. You did not ask for it but we will send a dancing instructor as well. Won’t that be fun? I want you both to be comfortable in a ball-room with all types of dancing, in case we go to Bath or London for entertainment.”

  Several afternoons were spent with Georgiana’s lady’s maid arranging Mary’s and Kitty’s hair using the latest fashion magazines whilst Elizabeth and Georgiana looked on. New friendships were formed and enjoyment was had by all. Mary saw much improvement from her current hairstyle which no one actually cared for. Kitty already had a stylish coiffure, but delighted in the pampering and attention immensely. Both Mary and Kitty received instruction on how to achieve these new styles on their own and in each other’s hair, so that they could help each other at Longbourn. Finally, both girls were taken to Lambton to order new dresses. For Kitty this was so very enjoyable and a much appreciated addition to her current wardrobe. For Mary, who mostly wore brown dresses with stiff white collars, this was quite stressful. The dressmaker was very patient and attentive. Much time was spent in studying what fabrics were most becoming with Mary’s coloring and complexion. She had a dark brown wavy mane and dark brown eyes. All were surprised to see how well she looked in any shade of grey or silver. Mary also looked very becoming in lavender, blush pink, light yellow, and powder blue. If she felt emboldened to choose a more vibrant color for an over-dress or an accessory, then colors like teal, navy blue, emerald green, fuchsia, and violet looked best. Even Mary chuckled when it became apparent that the brown fabrics did not suit her at all! She could admit that brown was much more becoming on Kitty who had auburn tresses and green eyes. Mary also struggled with choosing necklines that were flattering, but not so daring they would not make her feel self-conscious. She relied on her sisters and sister-in-law to give her good advice. Eventually, she was able to select the most becoming styles for each of the many types of dresses needed in the most flattering colors. But that it had required considerable effort! She also chose a light grey muslin ball gown featuring short sleeves with a shimmering silver over-dress that included delicate silver beading. Elizabeth asked the dressmaker if the large order could be hurried along. It would be very enjoyable to see her sisters model every new dress before returning to Longbourn.

  Elizabeth also took Mary shopping for a new cloak, spencers, a shawl, a pelisse with matching muff, bonnets, dancing slippers, gloves, reticules, and a new sterling silver necklace with a crucifix pendant on it. Mary was so very touched by all of the gifts, but especially the necklace. They had decided that two of Mary’s best dresses in the unflattering brown would be sent to the dressmaker and made into tunics that Kitty could wear as over-dresses and the remainder would go to the servants.

  “How is it that you have no wardrobe to speak of, Mary?”

  “You won’t like my answer.”

  “Tell me Mary, is Papa withholding your pin-money?”

  “No, but Mama has been taking it and giving it to Lydia.”

  “Is this so?”

  Mary nodded.

  “That must stop immediately. I shall write to Papa. Mary, Lydia probably did not tell you, but part of the marriage settlement that Fitzwilliam negotiated included allowing Lydia to receive one hundred pounds a year from Papa after she married Wickham. It amounts to roughly what Papa thought he spent on her each year including her pin-money, gifts from Mama, and her board at Longbourn. If she is now receiving your pin-money, through Mama, she is receiving far more than twice what she was accustomed to receiving as pin-money when she lived at home!”

  “She never told me that.”

  “No, I wouldn’t think that she would mention it. That is a scheme she has learned from Wickham. Mary, when Fitzwilliam and his cousin, the Colonel, finally discovered Wickham and Lydia in London, they sought to bring Lydia home or back to Brighton before a scandal broke out, without a marriage being necessary. But Lydia would not go. She refused. So Fitzwilliam was forced to bring about the marriage, instead. He spent about four thousand pounds to ensure that Wickham would marry Lydia.”

  Mary gasped. “Why would he do that? And why would it take so much money?”

  “Over two thousand pounds went to pay Wickham’s considerable debts in Meryton, Brighton and London. He is profligate in every sense of the word. Some of Wickham’s debts were owed to shopkeepers, but he also had debts of honour owed to his fellow officers which had to be paid off if he was to stay in the military. Fitzwilliam was merely trying to bring about the marriage to save our family from ruin and Lydia was already willing to marry Wickham. Fitzwilliam wanted to save our family so that he could marry me. He also felt partly responsible for not having exposed Wickham in the neighborhood as the wastrel and rake that he is. Fitzwilliam settled one thousand pounds on Lydia alone, so that Wickham cannot just abandon her with the settlement. The interest is paid directly to Lydia in annual installments, so if Wickham wants access
to the income, he has to stay with Lydia. Neither of them can spend the principle, since we know that Lydia is similarly unable to hold onto her money. Lastly, Wickham’s commission as an ensign in the regulars was purchased by Fitzwilliam. That summarizes Fitzwilliam’s contributions. But Father also had to contribute. He has pledged to pay Lydia one hundred pounds a year as I mentioned. And Papa settled Lydia’s portion, an equal share, of the five thousand pounds settled on us all after our parents have passed, on Lydia alone. This interest will also eventually be paid directly to her to entice Wickham to stay in the marriage.”

  “I don’t know what to say. She never told me any of this! Oh Lizzy, I feel worse for her now than I did before. To think that her husband is such a man. Her life is ruined!”

  “Yes, it is. But she is probably too foolish to realize it yet or too obstinate to admit it. Jane and I have agreed that we will never attempt to expose Wickham’s true character to Lydia. There is no cause for it. He is her husband. And Lydia never hears nor sees anything of which she chooses to be insensible. I will not lie to Lydia, but if she loses all respect and affection for her husband, her situation will become more abhorrent than it already is. Wickham has been rescued before by Fitzwilliam; last year was not the first time. The recovery from the misfortunes of last July and August addressed two of the three challenges faced. Wickham’s past profligacy was cleared as his debts were all paid. The scandal and disgrace faced by our family was forever averted by bringing about the marriage. But the Wickhams’ future is very uncertain. By my calculation, their income is two hundred and forty pounds a year and whatever Wickham can earn by way of prize money from fighting in battle. So when I tell you that Lydia is receiving far more money than she is accustomed to receiving, it is true, but it is not a complete picture. Though their income is sufficient for two people to live upon, it is a more modest style of living than that to which Lydia has become accustomed. Their lodgings will not be nearly as fine or as large as Longbourn. Lydia will likely only have one servant, at the most two. They cannot even afford a horse and gig. And she must now run a household, which she has never been trained to do. That requires budgeting and planning. From their income, they must pay for lodgings, food and drink, a servant’s wages, clothing, coal, wood, candles, soap, and even some of Wickham’s army supplies. I mailed her Mrs. Rundell’s book on household economy some time ago and included an exemplar household budget for their income and situation.”

  “Do you think they will adhere to such advice?”

  “I do not believe they will until Wickham has accepted that her family will no longer give them money. Mary, I am going to ask of you something very hard. But I am going to ask it anyway. Your pin-money is yours. Which means you may do with it what you will. I have no authority over it. But I am going to ask you to keep it for yourself. Papa can pay you directly at my request. Papa can even hold your money in his book-room if you are worried about Mama removing it out of your bed-chamber. But you will be importuned by Mama’s and Lydia’s requests. At least Lydia’s requests will only be in writing. But Mama will ask you directly for your pin-money, are you willing to refuse her?”

  “I think so.”

  “You are not helping Lydia by giving it to her, only postponing the future. The Wickhams have a list of people to whom they write to ask for money. But it is not your obligation to give them your pin-money. It just encourages them to continue to spend beyond their means. Your responsibility is to be a good daughter to Papa and Mama, which you are, and to continue improving your accomplishments. I also want you to try to envision your future as a wife. Would you prefer to be married to an officer, a vicar, a barrister, a physician, a tradesman, or possibly a farmer? Perhaps you prefer a gentleman? Does a country setting suit you best or do you prefer the city?”

  Mary smiled. “Lizzy, I shall do as you ask and consider my future. I do think I would prefer the country, though. Would you write to Papa, so I need not explain it to Mama? She is going to be very angry.”

  “Of course, and I shall tell Papa he can assign the blame to me. Mary, I want you to be well and happily settled in your own time and without reference to the Wickhams. Lydia’s life is going to become much harsher than it is today. They don’t even have children yet! And he is unwilling to put his education to any use. So your pin-money currently is helping to support his apathy, indolence, and most likely his gambling. There will be ample opportunity to help Lydia in the future, when there are children, Wickham has a mistress, and one day he just doesn’t come home.”

  Mary gasped.

  Elizabeth wrote her father that same day explaining the situation with Mary’s and possibly some of Kitty’s pin-money. He promptly wrote back saying that he had made an alteration in the household and that in the future he would be responsible for laying out not just the pin-money for Mary and Kitty, but the servants’ wages as well. The shop keepers had been told to keep the Bennet accounts on a cash only basis so Mrs. Bennet could not divert money from the household accounts to the Wickhams by accumulating debt on their accounts in Meryton either. Lastly he had written to the Wickhams explaining the new arrangement and telling them if money requests were to be made, they should be made directly to him. He would make no promises he would accede to their wishes, but they should be aware Mrs. Bennet no longer had access to funds other than her own pin-money. Elizabeth was pleased at her father’s haste in taking action to counter his wife’s duplicity; for his anger at her would be short lived. Mary and Kitty travelled back to Longbourn shortly after the delivery of their new clothes and other purchases.

  Chapter 10

  Mary was eagerly anticipating her lessons from the Masters. She relished the opportunity, never before afforded her, of improving upon her existing accomplishments through the expertise of another. But the lessons themselves were not exactly what she had expected them to be. Her literary lessons contained an unusual selection of titles that were going to be studied. But, particularly her music lessons were of an unexpected construction. Mr. Hogan, had asked her to play three or four pieces for him that she frequently played. He listened without comment. And then they began spending a considerable amount of time TALKING about playing the pianoforte rather than actually playing it. At last, Mary requested that he play one of her favorite and most difficult pieces, to satisfy her own curiosity that he could indeed play. Well! to simply say that he PLAYED the piece would be only half of the story. He BECAME the music. Mary had never seen or heard anything quite like his performance!

  “That is beyond my words to describe! How did you learn to do that?”

  “Well, many years of practise of course, but it all begins with your mind and your heart; how you feel about the music and why you are playing it.”

  And so they spent a fortnight talking about playing. Mr. Hogan looked at her entire repertoire of selected works, and they discussed why she had purchased those pieces. He advised her to search for pieces and composers that had personal meaning to her rather than those pieces that would simply display her skills. Even if she could not often go to concerts in town, her father read the papers and she should look for information on new concerts or composers. She must never play to secure attention for herself, but only for the love of playing. He taught her when it was appropriate to play for others and when it was not. You must always leave your audience yearning for more, not wishing for less, he advised. He showed her how to approach the instrument and how to withdraw from it. And whilst seated at the instrument, she must never display an attitude of superiority. She must humble herself to the music. Almost everything he said counteracted how Mary had approached her playing. But she had enough sense to realize he was teaching her things that she did not know. After all, though she was the most skilled at the pianoforte of the young women in Hertfordshire, having watched Mr. Bingley’s sisters perform last year and observing her own sister’s musical improvements following her marriage, Mary knew she could improve. And so then finally, with music that he himself brought to Longbo
urn, they began to play. And though demanding, it was very enjoyable, and surprisingly so, as they played without an audience.

  Longbourn, July 7

  My Dearest Elizabeth,

  Although your mother’s vexation was extreme, there is nothing she can do about the alterations I’ve made in managing the disbursement of household monies. Mary and Kitty’s lessons are progressing well and I am extremely hopeful, my child. Thanks be to you and Fitzwilliam. The girls are working hard, in spite of their mother’s complaints. Mary’s improvements have had a direct impact on our household comfort, as you might expect. For a time, she and her instructor, Mr. Hogan simply TALKED about playing the pianoforte, which is singular. Her playing now is much more pleasant to listen to and watch. Sometimes I even leave the door to my book-room open. And I cannot recall her quoting Fordyce’s Sermons since she returned from Pemberley. Except for your mother’s exclamations, I hardly know where I am! Kitty has shown me all of her new drawings and even I can see she is improving already. I’ve enclosed one small sketch for your viewing pleasure. She practises her French, but I cannot make out a word of it. So I shall trust the instructor, Monsieur Fontaine, who tells me that she improves. Lydia’s absence is still felt acutely for Kitty is much less silly and peevish than before. And I do not miss the regiment one bit. When the dancing instructor, Mr. Timmons, comes, I join them to complete a foursome and we have such a jolly time! I think this is where your money is best spent, for what gentleman will want a wife who cannot dance properly when in a ball-room?

  Thank you for your generous gifts to Mary. Her appearance is much finer and she has a more content and pleasing air about her person. When her mother tries to abscond with her pin-money, I hear YOU in Mary’s refusals. I foresee that you have now ensured my final years will be spent living alone with your mother.