Beau's Redemption Read online

  “You’re asking for trouble I don’t think you’re ready for,” I murmur, pushing off the pool table to close the distance between us.

  “Trouble is all I know,” he says with that heavy New York, Spanish accent.

  “But let me be clear. I’m not looking for a relationship,” I say. “I’m not… it’s just not a good idea.”

  A frown rushes across his face, but he quickly shuts it down and schools his features. Features that draw me in no matter the expression. Just when I think he has changed his mind, he reaches up to snatch my Stetson off my head and places it on top of his own.

  His full lips turn up higher. His eyes roll over me. Reaching to hook his finger into my belt loop, he tugs gently.

  “What are you waiting for, cowboy? Come and get it,” he croons low.

  Placing my fingers under his chin, I tilt his head and move in for a kiss. I’m thrown the moment our lips touch. I know it sounds cliché; I want to snort as the thought pops into my head. Yet when our lips meet, sparks fly.

  Angel’s tongue glides across the seam of my lips, and I open for him. He goes to deepen the kiss, but I take control. After lifting a hand to curl my fingers into his thick, long locks—the way I’ve wanted to for so long—I shift his head for better access and devour him.

  My Stetson tips off his head and lands on the pool table with a small thump, but that’s not enough to stop this collision that’s threatening my sanity. The mix of beer and something uniquely him favors his tongue. I groan, searching every corner, taking every breath I can. I plan to leave him breathless.

  Angel hums into my mouth, making me realize it’s him bouncing in place that’s causing the vibration between us. At least I want to blame that for the way I’m feeling. I wrap an arm around his waist and tug him in, holding him tightly. He relaxes into my hold, lifting a hand into my hair.

  I break the kiss before I lay him out on this pool table and take him right here. Placing my forehead to his, I allow us both to catch our breaths. Angel gives a small laugh.

  “Damn, Papi,” he pushes out.

  “My place,” I grunt.

  “You’re wasting time even saying it. Let’s go,” he replies.

  Everything except for getting to my place is forgotten. I even manage to block out my demons with the aid of the beer I’ve consumed throughout the night.

  Chapter 7

  Just This Once

  Angel

  I was a little thrown by the fact that Beau had a car waiting for him in the underground parking garage. I know he owns the gym, but I never thought about how much that place brings in. I certainly didn’t think it would be the type of money that supplies a driver.

  However, once in the back seat with Beau’s tongue down my throat, all of that was forgotten. After all, he only wants one night. It’s not my style, but this dude is not a regret I’m willing to have. I want him more with each passing second.

  “Damn, you’re driving me crazy,” Beau grunts as I claw down his back, and he struggles to unlock his front door.

  He has me pinned to the door, with one hand shoved down the back of my jeans and the other fumbling with his keys. The sound of our open belt buckles knocking against each other fills the air, pulling a laugh from my lips. Beau hisses when my nails bite into his ass as I shove his jeans down his hips and nip at his neck.

  “Focus, Papi. Get us inside,” I croon in his ear.

  I pull back to look into his eyes. He blinks seemingly to focus. I love that I have him this dazed. I can’t wait to have that gorgeous face twisted up from pleasure. I’m going to bring the Latin spice to his country ass all night.

  If all I get is one, I’m going to make it worth it. As if reading my thoughts, he turns his attention to the lock and opens it quickly. We push through the entrance, joined together once again. I tug his shirt over his head and toss it behind me.

  He drags my shirt up next and sends it flying through the air. Beau shifts me in a swift motion. My back hits the now-closed door, this time with us securely cloaked within his dimly lit apartment.

  His lips are on me again, kissing and nipping at my chin. I love that he kisses like a starved man, taking with every caress, nip, sip. I’m used to topping, but I like this power play we’re having. Beau makes me want to see where he’ll take me. It excites me in a new way.

  We lock lips, teasing each other with our tongues. We both toe off our shoes, causing our kisses to become sloppy and clumsy. Laughs leave both our lips, pulling me further into the comfort this man has wrapped around me.

  I want to bask in the attention and security being with him provides. I feel renewed. I dare to grasp that feeling, even if it’s just for tonight. It’s like a lifesaver I hadn’t known I needed so badly.

  “Lube and condoms are in my room,” he pants, flicking my chin with his tongue.

  “I’ve got us,” I reply.

  He pulls back and gives me a questioning look. A smile plays on his lips. I shrug my shoulders.

  “Someone slipped them in my pocket at the club. I tucked them in my wallet,” I offer.

  “You’re making me hate the fact you work at Refuge,” he grumbles and frowns.

  “Just one night, remember,” I say more bitterly than I mean to.

  Beau takes a pause, his eyes searching mine. I see the chance at tonight slipping away fast. I’m not having it. Grasping his hips, I flip our positions until his back hits the door. I take his mouth and don’t allow him to take over the kiss this time. He tries, but I’m not giving in.

  Biting his lower lip, I tug. He groans, shoving his hands in my hair. He has a tight grasp on the strains he released from my hair tie in the car on the way here.

  My hands glide over his heated skin, moving up his ribs. I revel in the shiver that wrecks his body. With a grin, I start a trail of kisses from his jaw to his neck. I love his cologne. It makes me want to eat him up, a mix of something citrusy and clean. My mouth waters at the scent.

  He reaches for my hand, pressing my palm to his hard dick. I release a short laugh and look into his eyes. I caress his cheek with my free hand, dragging my fingers down his throat. “I think we’re both used to taking the lead. What are we going to do about that?”

  “I say we take things as they go,” he says huskily and swallows. “It’s been a while since I’ve… I’ve gotten the occasional blow job.”

  “You’re doing better than me, Papi,” I snort.

  “So why are we talking?”

  “Not sure,” I murmur against his lips, squeezing a hand full of thick dick in my hand.

  Beau

  I groan as his fingers flex around my cock. I want the fabric between his rough hand and my waiting erection gone. I need those full lips wrapped around me.

  I want this. God, do I want this, but I’m feeling too much. This reads of more than just a one-night stand. His touch keeps sending bolts of lightning through me. His kisses are intoxicating. I want to make this last, but that’s scaring the shit out of me.

  A time bomb ticks in my head. Somehow this is all going to blow up in my face. Random blow jobs are one thing. Tonight, I plan to cross lines I haven’t dared to since….

  Don’t, Beau.

  I close my eyes and try to breathe. Angel’s banter and directness are something I crave. He’s making me wish I could have more, take more from this than just a single night. I just know I can’t.

  “Stay with me, Poppa,” he whispers in my ear. “I’m here with you.”

  The way he says the last part tugs at something deep. I’ve seen Angel have to take breaks at the gym. I’ve watched for moments when he disappears into himself right before everyone’s eyes. I know being present is something that takes effort for him.

  “I’m with you,” I say as a promise I shouldn’t be making.

  But I am. I’m here, and the fact that I want to be screams warning. Angel starts to kiss his way down my chest, pulling me further into his spell. His tongue flicks out against my skin, and my hips buck.
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  I shove my hands into his thick hair and grasp a tight hold. I watch his descent with my lips parted. I think my heart might burst from my chest before he gets where I need him.

  I grunt with tortured frustration when he changes course and starts to lick back up my body from my pelvic bone to my nipple. Angel bites down on my nipple and lifts those brown eyes to mine. He wants to show he’s in control.

  Not for long.

  I push my jeans down my thighs, letting my cock spring free. Angel pulls back and looks down. I grin when his brow lifts. It’s clear he wasn’t expecting so much from what he could feel through the confines of my boxer briefs and jeans.

  That mischief plays on his lips. He looks at me in challenge, pushing down his own pants and boxers. My mouth waters as his thick, long cock comes into view. We both have more than average offerings.

  The question is who’s taking? I know I said we’d see how things go, but I can see we’re going to have a battle of wills tonight. That knowledge alone thrills me and has precum glistening from my tip.

  After reaching around him and grasping his ass, I shift our bodies again, his back to the door, my hand kneading his tight ass. My other hand cups his jaw as I sip from his lips. The kiss is demanding and coaxing. Our trapped cocks pulse against each other’s bellies.

  He smiles into the kiss, revealing that he’s enjoying this power play as much as I am. He locks his hand in the top of my hair and tugs my head back, breaking the connection. His tongue and lips seize my throat.

  “You like that?” he croons.

  “Yes,” I bite out.

  “I’ve been wanting to fuck that pretty mouth of yours all night. You gonna let me stick my dick in that mouth?”

  His breath fans my ear and neck. It’s like my entire body comes alive. I’m used to being the one doing the most dirty talking. I welcome this change. Especially as I think of his thick cock in my mouth.

  “Only if you’re sucking my cock at the same time, darlin’. I believe in pleasure for all. I want to hear you choking on my cock while I drain you dry,” I say.

  “Fuck.” He groans.

  I lower my head to see the need in his eyes. I think we’re both going to explode before we get started. I can’t remember being this turned on before. The thought is startling, and I slam the door shut on the memories that try to rush me with that revelation.

  Stay in the now.

  I blink back my thoughts and focus on Angel’s large bright orbs. Those whiskey eyes root me to where I need to be. We may sear right through each other tonight, but I plan to be here for every moment of it.

  Angel reaches out to wrap his hand around me, but suddenly everything changes. A loud bang from the street beyond my apartment shifts the atmosphere on a dime. Angel’s eyes glaze over. He stands frozen.

  Angel

  I flinch and spin. Bombs are exploding, rapid fire is moving closer and closer. They’re coming at us, and they’re coming hard. I can’t see a thing. Smoke and fog surround me. I can hear my team in my ear, but they’re in a panic.

  “Hernández, I have you covered,” Bachman calls into the earpiece. “I’m wit—”

  Another explosion sounds, and Bachman’s words are cut off. I don’t have time to process the sense of loss. I know… but I can’t let that distract me from covering those that are still with me.

  “Baby, baby, look at me. I’m right here. Look at me.” Beau’s voice pulls me back to the present.

  I’m shivering and sweating and not from the pleasure we were just about to give each other. The gray gaze staring back at me holds panic and worry. I swallow hard, tasting the bitterness of my life.

  “I’m sorry.” My words come out a near whisper.

  “Never, ever apologize,” he says into my hair as he pulls me close.

  I’m limp in his hold. I feel like the life has been drained from me. All thoughts of fucking float out of my head. I need to get out of here. My chest is already tightening.

  “I can’t do this,” I mutter, pulling away.

  I collect my clothes and start to drag them on. Beau just stands there watching me, wordlessly. I can’t look at him. I just need to go.

  Thankfully, he doesn’t try to stop me. I pull the door open and stand there with my back to him. I try to find the words to say, but nothing comes. Instead, I rush from his place like I have a fire lit under my ass. This was a bad idea.

  I’m never going to get my fucking life back.

  Chapter 8

  Too Much

  Beau

  I’ve been calling my sister since last night, and she hasn’t answered a single one of my calls. She’s probably pissed that I bailed from the club before she arrived, but I need to talk to her. Last night was…. I don’t know what has turned me inside out more, Angel’s freak-out or the haunting dreams I had once I finally fell into a fitful sleep.

  I would be drawn to the guy that’s just as fucked-up as I am, if not worse. I rub at my chest. The look on his face, the panic in his voice— I know that look of loss. Angel has had more than his share, I’m sure.

  My office door slams, causing me to turn around. Emma stands in my office, glaring at me. I lift a brow. I know I left the club without a word before she got there, but it wouldn’t be the first time. I can’t count the amount of times I’ve arrived at a party before Emma and Kyle decided it wasn’t my scene and left.

  Okay, I usually text, but I still don’t think this warrants the look she’s giving me. Her cheeks are red, and her chest is heaving. I fold my arms across my chest, waiting for her to explain.

  “How could you?”

  “I forgot to text you I was going to cut out early. I’m sorry,” I reply.

  “That’s not what I’m talking about.” She scoffs bitterly. Tears fill her eyes, and I start to get concerned.

  “What are you talking about?” I ask, dropping my arms and rounding my desk.

  “Don’t come near me.” She throws her hands up. “I never thought you would do something like this to me. I feel so stupid. I mean, he flirted with me for months. If I would’ve known, I wouldn’t have embarrassed myself. But you… I feel like such an ass.”

  “Darlin’, I’m so confused,” I say as I watch her with concern.

  “Bullshit, Beau. You knew. You knew I liked him. How could you? We kissed. I… I… shit. I don’t know if I kissed him or he kissed me. I’m an idiot. It all makes sense. The cold shoulder the next day. He’s not into me. I’ve been staying away because I really like him, and I… I was so confused, but you go and pounce as soon as I’m out of the picture.”

  “Em, I have no damn I idea what the hell you’re talking about.”

  “Don’t do that. Don’t make me feel stupid. I saw you. I know,” she says brokenly, tears spilling down her cheeks.

  “Em, I don’t know. I don’t understand what you’re talking about—”

  My office door bursts open. “Beau, you better get out here. It’s Angel.” Rustle, one of my fighters, rushes out.

  I look at my sister and purse my lips. I’m torn, but I need to know what’s going on in my gym with my employee. I squish the tightness in my chest as I think of the employee in question. I try to tell myself that my worry is just for the safety of all under my roof.

  “I’ll be right back,” I say and rush from my office.

  I jog to the front of the gym where the self-defense class is held. The view through the classroom’s glass reveals a crowd has gathered. Making my way inside, I push through everyone gathered in the room to make my way to the front.

  As the path opens up, Andres and Angel come into view. The blood drains from my face as Angel stands just like last night. His face is soaked in sweat, and his eyes are glazed over. His chest is heaving, and he looks like he’s staring down a ghost.

  “Angel, hermano, it’s me,” Andres says calmly.

  His words aren’t getting through. I clench my jaw tightly. I’m beginning to understand why Angel has had such a hard time keeping a job and
reacclimating to civilian life. It shreds me to pieces because this isn’t the confident man that was in my apartment last night before things went left.

  “Everyone out,” I bark.

  People murmur around me, but I can hear Emma and my staff ushering them out. I don’t take my eyes off Angel. Andres reaches for him, but before I can warn him not to, Angel strikes out. Thank God Andres is quick on his feet. Angel would have taken his head off if that hit connected. I can see the sheer force behind the strike.

  “Don’t, Andres. Let me,” I call out.

  “This is bad,” Andres says. “I haven’t seen him like this… it’s been awhile. He’s been doing so much better.”

  “I’ve got it,” I bite out. “Baby,” I call to Angel.

  “Holy shit,” Emma breathes out behind me. “Twins.”

  It hits me what the hell she was freaking out about in the office. She must have seen me with Angel at the club. I’d laugh my ass off if this wasn’t such a fucked-up situation.

  “Sweetheart, it’s me. I’m here, Angel. Come here, baby,” I say, ignoring everyone else.

  “I need backup in here,” he bellows.

  “No… no, you don’t, darlin’. I’m here. It’s me, Beau. Listen to my voice, baby. Come back to me.”

  His eyes start to clear, and I take the opportunity to move in. He looks at me, still disoriented. I wrap him in my arms and place my lips to his ear.

  “It’s me, baby. You’re safe. I’ve got you.” I start to rock him in my hold.

  Angel clings to my T-shirt with a grip so tight, I think he might tear the fabric right from my body. His sobs rock right through to my core. I close my eyes, knowing that everything has changed.

  I want more than one night with Angel. I want to know how to restore the man I started with last night. I want to show him how to survive. I’m just barely making it through, but I want to offer him that at least. A way to endure and survive.