Tales From a Not-So-Graceful Ice Princess Read online

  “I don’t know, guys. Skating for a charity is a really big responsibility. They’re going to be depending on us for money to help keep their doors open. And what if something goes wrong?”

  “Come on, Nikki!” Chloe whined. “We’re not good enough to skate individually, and skating pairs require a girl and a guy. But the three of us can skate as a group. We can’t do this without you!”

  “Sorry, but you’re going to have to find someone else!” I said, shaking my head.

  “But we want YOU!” Zoey pleaded.

  “Yeah, and don’t forget! We were there for you when you needed us for the talent show,” Chloe argued. “BFFs help each other!”

  Okay, I have to admit Chloe had a good point about the talent show. But it wasn’t like I’d promised them my firstborn child in exchange for them singing backup.

  Then Chloe and Zoey shrewdly resorted to a sophisticated tactic that effectively rendered me helpless. . . .

  “Okay, guys! I’m IN! But you can’t say I didn’t warn you!” I sighed.

  We sealed the deal with a group hug.

  “Great! Now all we have to do is find a local charity to skate for,” Zoey said.

  “Unfortunately, that’s going to be the hardest part,” Chloe said. “All of the high school kids have been signing up charities for a few weeks now. So we’re getting a really late start. But I’m pretty sure we’ll find one,” she added cheerfully.

  “OMG!” Zoey squealed. “This will be just like our old Ballet of the Zombies days! Only we’ll be getting an A instead of a D.”

  Actually, I kind of like that part too. It is going to be great to finally get an A in gym !

  Fortunately, ice-skating DOESN’T involve embarrassing armpit stains, painful stomach cramps, or getting whacked in the head by a ball, like most of the stuff we are forced to do in gym.

  And all of our work is going to be for a really great cause that will help the community.

  But most important, I’ll be making Chloe and Zoey superhappy by allowing them to live out their dreams.

  We decided to skate to “Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy” since it has a holiday theme. And we figured being fairy princesses would be superexciting and glamorous.

  So I’m not going to stress out about this whole Holiday on Ice thing.

  As long as I have my two BFFs by my side, everything is going to work out just fine.

  I mean, how HARD can figure skating be?!

  !!

  TUESDAY, DECEMBER 3

  Today in social studies we discussed career goals.

  But since I plan to attend a major university to become a professional illustrator, I decided to spend the hour writing in my diary instead.

  I felt it was the right thing to do since teachers always nag us students to use our class time wisely.

  Most of the kids had not given much thought to their futures.

  But my friend Theodore Swagmire III was totally obsessing over it.

  And it didn’t help that the class snickered when he shared his plans for the future. I felt a little sorry for him. He’s one of the dorkiest guys in the school.

  So, being the very kind and supportive friend that I am, I decided to encourage Theo to pursue his goals in life:

  The GOOD news is that our little chat made Theo feel a lot better !!

  The BAD news is that he decided to start saving his allowance to buy a magic wand !

  Anyway, after class was over, Theo asked me if I was planning to come to Brandon’s party in January. I wanted to tell the truth and just say no.

  But instead, I made up an excuse. And not just a run-of-the-mill flimsy excuse. It was a totally unbelievable, embarrassingly STUPID one.

  “I was planning to come. But I found out I had, um . . . an appointment to . . . take my sick . . . um, unicorn . . . to the . . . vet, actually.”

  Theo looked superconfused and scratched his head. “You have a unicorn?”

  I wanted to say, “Hey, Wizard Boy! I probably got MY unicorn from the same place you’re getting YOUR magic wand!” But I didn’t.

  Then in biology class, my very cruddy day turned into a complete DISASTER!

  Brandon and I said hi to each other, but that was about it. The entire hour he just kind of stared at me with this perplexed look on his face.

  He was probably imagining me as some kind of CRUSTY-EYED, HAIRY-LEGGED BEAST!

  MacKenzie took full advantage of the situation and would NOT shut up!

  I almost PUKED on my lab report when I heard her ask Brandon if he thought her Berry-Sweet-’n’-Flirty lip gloss color matched her flawless complexion.

  I could not believe she actually had the nerve to ask him something so ridiculously VAIN.

  Especially when EVERYONE knows MacKenzie’s so-called flawless complexion is from U-PAY-WE-SPRAY Tanning Salon at the mall.

  That pukey-orange tan they sprayed on her is so tacky. Personally, I think she looks like a sunburned Malibu Barbie dipped in Cheetos dust.

  Then MacKenzie got all giggly and said, “Oh, by the way, Brandon, I heard you’re having a party.”

  I was like, “Yeah, MacKenzie! And you’ll ONLY be HEARING about it, because you’re NOT invited!”

  But I just said that inside my head, so no one else heard it but me.

  I was shocked by what that girl did next!

  She tried to HYPNOTIZE Brandon into inviting her to his party by flirting with him and twirling her hair AROUND and AROUND and AROUND her finger.

  Just watching her made ME dizzy.

  Thank goodness our teacher interrupted her. “MacKenzie, if you have time to chitchat in class, please go to the back of the room and clean out all of the rat cages. Otherwise, PLEASE. SIT. DOWN!”

  MacKenzie practically RAN back to her seat.

  OMG! It was SO funny! She totally deserved it.

  But now she’s giving ME the EVIL EYE from across the room like it was MY fault she almost got stuck doing rat-poop duty.

  Anyway, I’m still convinced Brandon gave me a pity invitation. He probably didn’t want to hurt my feelings.

  I plan to tell him tomorrow that I can’t make it to his party because I have another activity planned for that exact same time.

  WHAT will I be doing?

  Sitting on my bed in my pajamas, STARING at the wall and SULKING!!!!!! !!

  WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 4

  This morning I was feeling kind of down.

  Even Chloe and Zoey noticed and asked me if I was okay. But I decided NOT to tell them about my mega-embarrassing phone conversation with Brandon. Especially after they went on and on about how EXCITED they were about his party.

  On my way to lunch I decided to stop by my locker and drop off my backpack.

  I was beyond surprised when I opened my locker door and a NOTE fell out!

  At first I thought it was from Chloe and Zoey and they were trying to cheer me up or something.

  But then I read it. Like, THREE TIMES!

  OMG! I thought I was going to have a meltdown right there in front of my locker. . . .

  I had no idea what Brandon wanted to talk to me about.

  My heart was pounding as I peeked inside the newspaper room. I immediately recognized his shaggy hair behind a computer monitor.

  “Nikki!” Brandon smiled, waved, and gestured for me to come over.

  Like an idiot, I looked behind me to make sure he wasn’t talking to some other, um . . . Nikki.

  “Yeah. Actually, I do.” That’s when I noticed Brandon looked a little nervous too.

  “Well! HERE I AM!” I blurted out all cheerful-like and louder than I meant to.

  “Okay, um, I talked to Theo yesterday, and he said you can’t come to my party.”

  GULP!

  Brandon talked to . . . THEO?!

  OH! CRUD!

  I just kept smiling stupidly as Brandon continued. “He said something about you having to take care of a, um, sick unicorn?”

  Just great! NOW Brandon was going to think
I am a crusty-eyed, hairy-legged, SCHIZOPHRENIC HYPOCHONDRIAC!

  “Really? Theo told you that?” I blinked my eyes all innocentlike and laughed nervously. “That’s . . . quite hilarious, actually. Theo’s got a big imagination. Just like my little sister. She’s as cute a button, but you can’t believe a word she says. Especially if it’s about . . . ME!”

  “Yeah, tell me about it.” Brandon laughed. “I wish I had a dollar for every time Brianna told me I have cooties.” Suddenly he stared at me so intensely it made me squirm. “Nikki, you didn’t seriously think I actually believed any of that stuff Brianna said about you, did you?”

  “OMG! Of course not! Like, how immature would THAT be?” I giggled nervously. “Actually, Chloe, Zoey, and I can’t WAIT to come to your party.”

  Brandon broke into a big grin. “Cool! You had me worried there for a minute.”

  “So, what are you working on right now?” I asked, trying to change the topic.

  I leaned over and peeked at his computer screen.

  I saw snapshots of the cutest puppy and kitten.

  “AWWW!” I gushed. “They’re ADORABLE!”

  “Those two are from the Fuzzy Friends Animal Rescue Center. These pictures are going to run in the Westchester Herald next week.”

  “Wow! Impressive. Does the animal center pay you to do that?”

  “Nope. I guess you could say I volunteer my time. I want to be a veterinarian one day, so I really enjoy working with animals. Even though photographing them can be pretty challenging.”

  “Well, I think it’s great that you take the time to help out. Sounds like fun!”

  “It is. Hey! Why don’t you come volunteer with me on Friday? I could use your help.”

  “Okay! That would be VERY cool!”

  Brandon brushed his bangs out of his eyes and gave me a crooked smile.

  I suddenly felt very nervous, giddy, and . . . nauseous.

  That’s when he kind of stared at me and I stared back at him.

  Then we both smiled and blushed.

  All of this staring, smiling, and blushing seemed to go on, like, FOREVER!

  Brandon and I spent the rest of the lunch hour just hanging out and talking about the animal shelter.

  He said it was run by a really nice semi-retired couple who used to own a pet shop.

  Then he took some photos out of his backpack and showed me all the animals that had already been placed in homes.

  So, not only is Brandon a supertalented photographer, but he has a really BIG heart, too.

  And get this! We went to my locker to pick up my books, and then we walked to bio together!

  SQUEEE!!!

  MacKenzie kept glaring at me and whispering to Jessica the entire hour, but I just ignored her.

  Okay, I admit it. I was wrong about the whole pity-invitation thing and Brandon not wanting to hang out with me.

  I’m actually looking forward to going to his party.

  And on Friday we’re going to have a BLAST volunteering at Fuzzy Friends!!

  Eat your heart out, MacKenzie!!

  !!

  THURSDAY, DECEMBER 5

  During library today Chloe and Zoey were busy making telephone calls trying to find a charity for the Holiday on Ice show.

  Chloe called nine places and Zoey called seven, but no luck.

  The deadline for entering is next week, and we’re not even CLOSE to finding a charity.

  But there’s even MORE bad news!

  I just found out today that MacKenzie is also planning to participate in the Holiday on Ice show !!

  Why am I NOT surprised?!

  Probably because she really IS a coldhearted Ice Princess! Okay, so maybe that nasty little comment ISN’T quite true.

  Her heart isn’t COLD! She DOESN’T have one!!

  MACKENZIE AS A HEARTLESS ICE PRINCESS

  While I was at my locker, I overheard MacKenzie bragging to some CCPs (Cute, Cool & Popular kids) that she’s been taking figure skating lessons since she was seven years old and plans to skate to music from Swan Lake.

  But this is the crazy part. She said she has FIVE charities BEGGING her to skate for them.

  Can you believe THAT?! We’re having trouble finding just one.

  Although, now that I think about it, she was probably just saying all that stuff to impress everyone.

  MacKenzie is SUCH a pathological liar! And a major DRAMA QUEEN.

  I know it’s supposed to be for a good cause. But I’m starting to get a really BAD feeling about this Holiday on Ice thing.

  !

  FRIDAY, DECEMBER 6

  I could hardly wait for school to be over. Every class just seemed to drag on and on and on. After the final bell rang, I rushed to my locker and Brandon was already there waiting for me.

  “Ready to go?” he said, smiling.

  “Yep! Oh, wait! I have a present for you from Brianna,” I said, digging into my backpack.

  Brandon pretended to be frightened. “Brianna?! I don’t know if I want it,” he teased. “She says I have cooties. I don’t think she likes me.”

  “She does. Well . . . actually, she doesn’t!” I giggled. “But she wanted you to have this.”

  I handed Brandon about two yards of red satin ribbon, and he looked a little confused. Then he playfully tied it around his head.

  “Oooh! Just the look I was going for!” he joked. “Tell Brianna I plan to wear it every day.”

  BRANDON, TOTALLY CRACKING ME UP WITH HIS WICKED SENSE OF HUMOR

  I laughed really hard. “It’s not for you, silly. It’s for the animals. Brianna said if we tie bows around their necks, they’ll look like presents. And since everyone loves a present, they’ll find new homes really fast.”

  “The kid’s a genius! Why didn’t I think of that?”

  I was a nervous wreck as we walked the four blocks to the Fuzzy Friends building. But Brandon kept me laughing the entire time.

  Three new puppies had come in, and each one needed to be photographed.

  They were absolutely adorable and playfully nibbled on my fingers.

  I cut the ribbon into three pieces and tied them around their necks.

  “Have a seat on the rug and hold the first puppy in your lap,” Brandon instructed. “Your sweater will be the perfect background for a close-up.”

  THE PUPPY AND I BOTH SMILE FOR THE CAMERA!

  We finished up in about forty-five minutes, and Brandon placed the last puppy back in the cage.

  I was a little sad when I went over to say good-bye to them. I especially liked the smallest one, which had a little circle around one eye. He barked and wagged his tail at me as if to say, “Please, don’t go!”

  But it felt really good knowing I was doing something to help them all find a new home.

  I was just about to leave when the smallest puppy pressed his nose against the cage door and it swung open.

  “HEY!” I said, surprised. “How did you—”

  But before I could finish my sentence, he quickly jumped into my lap, knocking me off balance.

  The other two puppies scampered close behind and pounced.

  “WHOA!” I yelled as I fell over backward on the floor.

  “Brandon! Help! The puppies got loose!” I giggled as they tickled my neck and chin.

  But that guy was no help WHATSOEVER.

  Not only was he LAUGHING at me, he just stood there taking pictures.

  His camera sounded like he was at a photo shoot for Fashion Week or something. Chick-koo. Chick-koo. Chick-koo. Chick-koo.

  “My bad!” he said, grinning. “I guess I closed the cage but didn’t latch it. Smile and say ‘CHEESE!’”

  “Brandon! I’m going to . . . KILL you!” I laughed as I tried unsuccessfully to herd the wiggly puppies back into the cage.

  We finished up and walked back to school. Then I called my mom to come pick me up.

  While we were waiting, Brandon made a very special thank-you card for Brianna. . . .

  Those little
pups looked SO SWEET in that photo!

  I just knew Brianna was going to LOVE it!

  And that red ribbon was perfect. I couldn’t decide who wore it better, Brandon or the puppies.

  Then Brandon totally surprised me and printed some of the snapshots he’d taken during the GREAT PUPPY ESCAPE. . . .

  I couldn’t believe I had actually lost my balance and fallen over like that.

  OMG! What if Brandon now thinks I’m just a big, clumsy . . . OX?! Or even worse, a big, clumsy . . . HAIRY-LEGGED, CRUSTY-EYED . . . ox?!

  Okay, I really need to take a CHILL PILL and stop worrying about what he thinks of me.

  Hanging out with Brandon at Fuzzy Friends wasn’t like a real date or anything.

  But I have to admit, I had the best time EVER!

  !

  SATURDAY, DECEMBER 7

  It’s hard to believe that the holidays are right around the corner.

  Mom and I spent most of the morning decorating our fake Christmas tree.

  Dad and Brianna were busy outside working on what they called a “super-duper secret project.”

  Dad said their big surprise was going to:

  1. Spread holiday cheer.

  2. Be a source of great pride for our family, AND

  3. Drastically INCREASE our household income.

  But I was hoping he’d surprise us with something more practical.

  Like a NEW JOB!

  One that does NOT involve him:

  1. Working at MY school.

  2. Driving a crazy-looking van with a roach on it.

  3. Exterminating bugs.

  4. Damaging my already very shabby reputation.

  Finally, Dad and Brianna called us outside to see their surprise.

  I had a really BAD feeling about their little project even before I actually saw what they had done. Mostly because Dad and Brianna have the combined IQ of a TOOTHBRUSH.

  And I was right!

  I took one look at their monstrosity and totally FREAKED. . . .

  I was like, WHAT is THAT?!

  Riding around in Dad’s van with that roach can be a pretty TRAUMATIC experience.