Stabenow, Dana - Powers Of Detection (Editor) Read online

  “Why would he want to keep me around after killing me?

  “To gloat! He hated your guts, Larry; it has to be him!

  I thought about it. Id rubbed Maxs nose in it before, and all he ever did was talk. Maybe... hed got tired of talking.

  “All right, I said. “Lets go see the big man and ask him a few pointed questions.

  “Hes got a lot of protection, said Maggie. “Not at all an easy man to get to see.

  “Do I look like I care? Are you in or not?

  “Of course Im in! Im just pointing out that Big Max is known for surrounding himself with heavy-duty firepower.

  I smiled. “Baby, Im dead. How are they going to stop me?

  -

  We went out into the streets, and walked through the Nightside. The rain had stopped, and the air was sharp with new possibilities. Hot neon blazed on every side, advertising the kinds of love that might not have names, but certainly have prices. Heavy bass lines surged out of open club doors, reverberating in the ground and in my bones. All kinds of people swept past us, intent on their own business. Only some of them were human. Traffic roared constantly up and down the road, and everyone was careful to give it plenty of room. Not everything that looked like a car was a car, and some of them were hungry. In the Nightside, taxis can run on deconsecrated altar wine, and motorcycle messengers snort powdered virgins blood for that extra kick.

  Maxs place wasnt far. He holed up in an upmarket cocktail bar called the Spiders Web. Word is he used to work there once. And that he had his old boss killed when he took it over, then had the man stuffed and mounted and put on display. Max never left the place anymore, and held court there from behind more layers of protection than some presidents can boast. The big man had a lot of enemies, and he gloried in it.

  Along the way I kept getting quick flashes of déjà vu. Brief glimpses of my dream of running through the rain. Except I was pretty sure by now that it wasnt a dream but a memory. I could feel the desperation as I ran, pursued by something without a face.

  The only entrance to the Spiders Web was covered by two large gentlemen with shoulder holsters, and several layers of defensive magics. I knew about the magics because a client had once hired me to find out exactly what Max was using. Come to think of it, no one had seen that client for some time. I murmured to Maggie to hang on to my arm, then drew my wand and activated it. It shone with a brilliant light, too bright to look at, and all around us the world seemed to slow down, and become flat and unreal. The roar of the traffic shut off, and the neon stopped flickering. Maggie and I were outside Time. We walked between the two bodyguards, and they didnt even see us. I could feel the defensive magics straining, reaching out, unable to touch us.

  We walked on through the club, threading our way through the frozen crowds. Deeper and deeper, into the lair of the beast. There were things going on that sickened even me, but I didnt have the time to stop and do anything. I only had one shot at this. Maggie held my arm tightly. It would probably have hurt if Id still been alive.

  “Well, she said, trying for a light tone and not even coming close. “A genuine wand of the Faerie. That explains a lot of things.

  “It always helps to have an unsuspected edge.

  “You could have told me. I am your partner.

  “You can never tell whos listening, in the Nightside. I probably would have told her, if she hadnt ended our affair. “But I think Im past the point of needing secrets anymore.

  We found the big man sitting behind a desk in a surprisingly modest inner office. He was playing solitaire with tarot cards, and cheating. Thick mats of ivy crawled across the walls, and the floor was covered with cabalistic symbols. I closed the door behind us so we wouldnt be interrupted, and shut down the wand. Max looked up sharply as we appeared suddenly in front of him. His right hand reached for something, but Maggie already had her silver magnum derringer out and covering him. Max shrugged, sat back in his chair, and studied us curiously.

  Max Maxwell, so big they named him twice. A giant of a man, huge and lowering even behind his oversized mahogany desk. Eight feet tall and impressively broad across the shoulders, with a harsh and craggy face, he looked like he was carved out of stone. A gargoyle in a Savile Row suit. Max traded in secrets, and stayed in business because he knew something about everyone. Or at least, everyone who mattered. Even if he hadnt killed me, there was a damned good chance he knew who had.

  “Larry Oblivion, he said, in a voice like grinding stone. “My dearest rival and most despised competitor. To what do I owe the displeasure of this unexpected visit?

  “Like you dont already know, said Maggie, her derringer aimed directly between his eyes.

  Max ignored her, his gaze fixed on me. “Provide me with one good reason why I shouldnt have both of you killed for this impertinence?

  “How about; you already killed me? Or havent you noticed that I only breathe when I talk?

  Max studied me thoughtfully. “Yes. You are dead. You have no aura. I wish I could claim the credit, but alas, it seems someone else has beaten me to it. And besides, if I wanted you dead, youd be dead and gone, not hanging around to trouble me.

  “Hes right, I said to Maggie. “Max is famous for never leaving loose ends.

  “You want me to kill him anyway? said Maggie.

  “No, I said. “Tell me, Max. If you didnt kill me, who did?

  “I havent the faintest idea, said Max, smiling slowly, revealing grey teeth behind the grey lips. “Which means it isnt any of your usual enemies. And if I dont know, no one does.

  I felt suddenly tired. Max had been my best bet, my last hope. He could have been lying, but I didnt think so. Not when he knew the truth could hurt me more. My body was decaying, I had no more leads, and I didnt have the time left to go anywhere else. So Maggie and I walked out the way we came in. Maggie would have killed Max, if Id asked, but I didnt see the point. Feuds and vendettas are for the living; when youre dead you just cant be bothered with the small shit.

  -

  Maggie took me back to her place. I needed time out, to sit and think. I was close to despair. I didnt have enough time left to investigate all the enemies Id made in my personal and professional life. A disturbing and depressing thought, for someone facing eternity. So many enemies, and so few friends... I sat on Maggies couch, and looked fondly at her as she made us some coffee. Wed been so good together, for a while. Why didnt it work out? If I knew the answer to that, wed still be together. She came in from the kitchen, carrying two steaming mugs. I took one, and held it awkwardly. I wanted to drink the coffee to please her, but I couldnt. She looked at me, puzzled.

  “Larry? Whats the matter?

  And just like that, I knew. Because I finally recognized the voice Id been hearing ever since I woke up dead.

  I was at Maggies place, drinking coffee. It tasted funny. Larry? she said. Larry? Whats wrong? I felt something burning in my throat, and knew shed poisoned me. I stopped time with my wand, and ran. It was raining. I didnt dare go home. Shed find me. I didnt know where to go for help, so I went to ground, in my old safe house at Blaiston Street. And I died there, still wondering why my partner and ex-lover had killed me.

  “It was you, I said, and something in my voice made her flinch. “You poisoned me. Why?

  “The how is more interesting, Maggie said calmly. She sat down opposite me, entirely composed. “An old voodoo drug in your coffee, to kill you and set you up for the zombie spell. But of course I didnt know about the wand. It interacted with my magic, buying you more time. The wands magic is probably whats holding you together now.

  “Talk to me, Maggie. We were lovers. Friends. Partners.

  “That last one is the only one that matters. She blew on her coffee, and sipped it cautiously. “I wanted our business. All of it. I was tired of being the junior partner, especially when I did most of the work. But you had the name, and the reputation, and the contacts. I didnt see why I should have to go on sharing my money with you. I was the brains i
n our partnership, and you were only the muscle. You can always hire muscle. And... I was bored with you. Our affair was fun, and it got me the partnership I wanted; but, Larry darling, while you might have been adequate in bed, you were just so damned dull out of it.

  “I couldnt split up the business. I needed the cachet your name brings. And I couldnt simply have you killed, because under the terms of your will, your ex would inherit your half of the business. And I really didnt see why I should have to go to all the trouble and expense of buying her out.

  “So I got out my old books and put together a neat little package of poisons and voodoo magics. As a zombie under my control, you would have made and signed a new will, leaving everything to me. Then Id dispose of your body. But clearly I didnt put enough sugar in your coffee. Or maybe you saw something in my face, at the last. Either way, that damned secret wand of yours let you escape. To a safe house I didnt even know we had anymore. You have no idea how surprised I was when you rang me three days later.

  “Why didnt you remember? The poison, the spells, the trauma? Or maybe you just didnt want to believe your old sweetie could have a mind of her own and the guts to go after what she wanted.

  “So why point me at Max? I said numbly.

  “To use up what time youve got left. And there was always the chance youd take each other out and leave the field even more open for me.

  “How could you do this? I loved you, Maggie!

  “Thats sweet, Larry. But a girls got to live.

  She put aside her coffee, stood up, and looked down at me. Frowning slightly, as though considering a necessary but distasteful task. “But its not too late to put things right. I made you what you are, and I can unmake you. She pulled a silver dagger out of her sleeve. The leaf-shaped blade was covered with runes and sigils. “Just lie back and accept it, Larry. You dont want to go on as you are, do you? Ill cut the consciousness right out of you, then you wont care anymore. Youll sign the necessary papers like a good little zombie, and Ill put your body to rest. Its been fun, Larry. Dont spoil it.

  She came at me with the dagger while she was still talking, expecting to catch me off guard. I activated my wand, and time crashed to a halt. She hung over me, suspended in midair. I studied her for a moment; and then it was the easiest thing in the world to take the dagger away from her and slide it slowly into her heart. I let time start up again. She fell forward into my arms, and I held her while she died, because I had loved her once.

  I didnt want to kill her, even after everything shed done and planned to do. But when a mans partner kills him, hes supposed to do something about it.

  -

  So here I am. Dead, but not departed. My body seems to have stabilized. No more maggots. Presumably the wand interacting with the voodoo magics. I never really understood that stuff. I dont know how much longer Ive got, but then, who does? Maybe Ill have new business cards made up. Larry Oblivion, deceased detective. The postmortem private eye. I still have my work. And I need to do some good, to balance out all the bad I did while I was alive. The hereafters a lot closer than it used to be.

  Even when youre dead, theres no rest for the wicked.

  Lovely

  JOHN STRALEY

  It was a piece of good luck. Gunk had been hungry when he came upon the dead thing sprawled under the wharf. It was opened up, with its insides showing to the air, a fine scent rising from the blue-grey bowels, where the last thing it ate would be waiting to be eaten again.

  Gunk had spent the morning looking around, singing a soft tune to himself. Humming helped make his eyes sharper, Gunk was convinced of that. In fact, he thought he always heard a little chime each time he found a lovely piece of meat. He had no idea if the sound was actually in the air, like the sound of rocks falling down a slope, or inside himself, like the rumbling of his guts, but he was sure that there was a sound associated with finding a sparkling piece of meat.

  At first the insides of any animal seem shiny. This is what had caught Gunks eye as he had been standing on the lip of a Dumpster back behind the fish plant. It was the sparkling of fat along the red incision. It appeared like a gem back in the darkness under the wharf, and he heard his mysterious little chime. This was a summer kill, no doubt about that. In winter, fresh blood on the snow was an impossible scarlet, not nearly the same as the spilled blood of a grey-green summer. Blood in winter was a hunger red. This summer kill showed more fat, white fat... and the blood was more a greasy shadow on the rocks, with hardly any color at all.

  The dead thing was tucked back up under the shadow of the dock, where the pearls of water were all drippy and bright, plunking down into the ocean. The dead thing hadnt been there an hour ago, Gunk was certain, because as hungry as he had been he would surely have seen it.

  Gunk hadnt heard any loud noises. None of the other real creatures had startled or risen up from their places. Gunk was beginning to worry about the body. He had heard stories of real creatures eating things and getting sick. Sick enough to die. And it was suspected that it was from eating these unlucky dead things. He walked around, looking at it from every angle he could. All big animals looked awkward after death, but humans looked even worse, as if they had fallen down and broken apart on the inside. Finally, Gunk spread his wings a bit and hopped on the top of the human near where its eyeholes were still open.

  The eyeholes looked too good, and he started in on them, taking short hard jabs with his beak to get to the tasty juice and the really lovely hard muscle behind. He didnt care if it was unlucky; some opportunities just had to be taken.

  A human being came stumbling up the rocks. This one was alive, and very fat. He seemed to be almost as happy as Gunk to find the dead thing.

  “Hey! Hey! Get back! Gunk said to him, but of course this clumsy walker ignored him.

  “Goddamn it, Harry, the fat man said to the dead thing. “You are going to get us in a bunch of trouble. This man ran his hands all around the dead thing as if he were looking for something good to eat. He seemed agitated, and for a minute the raven became concerned that he was going to take the tasty dead thing away.

  “I know you have it here. Come on, old son, too late to be keeping secrets from me now, the fat one said. Then he jerked his hand out and held something up in front of his flat ugly face. Green leaves, all the same shape and size. The mans eyes opened wide, and for a moment Gunk thought he was going to eat the leaves, which would be very strange.

  “Hey! Hey! Hey! Take those things away if you want! Just get the hell away from my dead thing! Gunk said, but the fat man ignored him.

  “Shut up! Shoo! the ugly one said.

  “Hey, hey, hey... cut that out! Gunk yelled back.

  Gunk wanted a few minutes alone with the dead thing. He wanted to get some of the fat under the skin and some of the lovely-smelling food cooked down in the intestines before he called the rest of the real creatures over. The only thing worse than not finding food was wasting it by letting it sit too long and letting some other nasty animal get to it. The real creatures would make the best use of the dead thing. It upset him that this human being was trying to get rid of him.

  The fat man rolled the dead thing over and kept searching it. He stuffed the leaves in his own pocket, then rolled the dead thing down the slope toward the water. The ugly one stuffed rocks into the outer folds of the outside skin where he had gotten the leaves.

  “Hey! Hey! Hey! Gunk yelled.

  “So long, buddy boy, the fat one said. Then he rolled the dead thing into the deep water.

  “Doo doo! Gunk screamed. “You big basket butt! What the hell are you doing! The raven was livid. He hopped up and down, then walked straight up into the air by the mans face. “Hey! Hey! Waste! Waste! Waste!

  Gunk was so mad he decided to follow the ugly one until the ugly one killed something else. He hadnt taken any food at all, and this fat man must certainly eat a lot, so it seemed clear to Gunk the fat man would have to kill something again soon. Gunk would be ready. He would rush right in a
nd not wait for this stupid basket butt to waste another beautiful dead thing by giving it to the skittery little sand fleas and the sad swimmers who flew on the surface of that other world.

  The fat man waved him off. “Gawh! Get the hell away from me!

  Gunk hopped on the wires above the street, following the fat man as he lurched along on his strange round legs.

  “You cant lose me, fat boy! Gunk yelled. “Dont even try! Go and kill something else and hurry up about it.

  The day carried a slurry of scents from the fish plant and the dump up the hill. Gunk liked this section of the waterfront even if he had to compete with the dim-witted eagles and the bothersome crows. There were black mushrooms of garbage in the backs of buildings, and now and then he was lucky enough to find a dead dog in the ditch. Once he had even found a hapless eagle who had gotten too close to the transformers on the buzzing power poles and had cooked himself up and fallen onto the street for Gunk to find.

  Gunks world was a gorgeous curve and tumble of rock and waterways, lumps and swales, places of shade and sunlight, updrafts and calm. The world glittered and curved from Gunks perspective, and everything human beings did transformed into hard angles and bossy lines that cut across anything in their way. Maybe that was why the fat one was so stupid and wasteful.

  Gunk stopped yelling at him, thinking that it might ruin the humans hunting luck. Gunk had learned this by following brown bears. If one of the real creatures spoke too loudly, whatever it was the bear was hunting would overhear and go to ground or disappear up into the mountain. It was bad for the bear and for Gunk, so he shut up and flew down the street to the wire high up on the intersection. Hed wait for the man. Humans were easy to follow because of their love of straight lines and hard edges. They always stayed on their paths, and you could always hop up ahead to the next intersection. It was sad in a way. Humans were even more predictable than the bears.

  “Gunk! What? What? What? Tawk called out to him from a low alder tree above his favorite garbage can.