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  Copyright 2018 Piper Frost

  Cover design © 2018 Inked Imprints

  I turn toward my best friend's girl as she watches him cross the field hunting for beer.

  "Jo, you seen Kinlee?" I ask her, unable to spot the blonde beauty anywhere.

  God, she's pretty. Kinlee, I mean. She's got beautiful blonde hair, bright blue eyes, a cute nose, and shapely lips I'll probably never feel on mine.

  "Last I saw, she was over by the lake. I think she had to piss." Her eyes never leave Brandt.

  I tuck my hands into the pockets of my jeans and rock onto my boot heels, hoping Brandt hurries back so I can go find Kinlee. I don't have much to talk to Jo about, but only because I spent the day with her and Brandt and we've been talking all day. When I finally see Brandt approaching, I put my hands out. He tosses me a beer and we smirk at each other then pull out our pocketknives at the same time. I stab the side of my can when he does, and we both shotgun the cold liquid.

  "Hell." He laughs. "I still can't believe you're fuckin' leaving us." Holding up his beer, he shouts, "Here's to Bo!"

  "Yay!" Jo squeals 'cause she's the only one around and I chuckle. She don't drink, but she doesn't have to for her to be fun.

  "Yay," I mimic then shotgun the second beer. "Hey, imma take a piss. I'll catch up." Before either can say anything, I start heading toward the water.

  In our group of friends there's a few blonde girls, but none have blonde hair like Kinlee, so when I see the glisten of her hair from the fire-pit light, I head toward it.

  Kinlee Jones was the first girl to talk to me. Now, I ain't pathetic, and that ain't why I love her. I love her 'cause she's the sweetest, prettiest, kindest girl I've ever met. When she moved to town, she had my back one particular day at school when Brandt hadn't been there, and ever since, we've been friends. It was only her second day at our school and when Cash Fayer threw my lunch in the trash, she really let him have it. Such a sweet, little blondie coming to save the day for me made my heart open and try to trap her inside. Unfortunately, it never happened.

  "It's my last night." I smile at her, interrupting her conversation, but I need her attention. I may never see this girl again and she may likely be the love of my life.

  "So I've heard, cowboy." She smiles and tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. "Pretty big going away party."

  I chuckle and dip my head. She knows this ain't for me. This is any Saturday night bonfire.

  "Yeah." I shrug and tuck my hands into my pockets, moving closer. "Only a few people I'll miss pretty bad."

  "Brandt's gonna be a lost puppy without you." She laughs. Her laugh's always made my stomach tumble. And her voice has been my favorite southern twang since I met her.

  "Yeah." I chuckle. "Me too. I've known that guy since kindergarten." When I look into her smiling face, I wish it were for me, but the girl's always smiling like that.

  "Been a long time," she says, her eyes hit mine and she shrugs with a grin. "We've known each other a long time too, so I guess I'll miss you." That sweet laugh giggles from her and her eyes float down to her boots where she kicks a clump of dirt. Before I can say anything, she asks, "So it was your birthday last week. Your parents buy you another new car?" This laugh of hers is mocking, but even it puts heat in my stomach.

  My parents' money has always been the subject of many jokes around here.

  I shake my head no, not botherin' to mention what they did buy me, and I move on to more important things. "What do you mean you guess you'll miss me?" I grin a crooked smile that's always made my face look lopsided, but it's the realest smile I got. And if anyone deserves a genuine smile, it's Kinlee.

  When she giggles a little harder, I take her hand and pull her into a hug. My arms wrap around her, pinning hers to her sides, probably making this hug uncomfortable, but I don't want to let go. Kinlee Jones has had my heart since sixth grade and the girl hasn't even known it. I never came out and told her, and she never picked up on my lame flirting attempts. We've only been friends. As close as any of our friends in the circle. I'm leaving after tonight and I'm not coming back. I don't have much to lose, except one thing...

  "Hey, Kinlee," I murmur as I let her go and she slips out of my arms. She opens her mouth to say something, those pretty lips part, but I cut her off. "I've liked you since the first day I met you in the sixth grade." Then I go for it. I lean in and push my lips to hers.

  I'm not too experienced with girls, and I think I'm kissing her too hard, but her tongue meets mine and I taste sweet liquor. A little surprised I had the balls to do that, I pull back too soon.

  "Everyone can see us, Bo," she whispers.

  I'm not sure what she means by that, but she ain't backing away from me so I take her hand, holding it in a way I've never done before, and I walk her around Miller's truck that broke down here six weeks ago that he can't fix. I told the guy to buy me a case and I'd have it running in a few hours, but he's a prick. I'm not helping out pricks.

  I'm getting off track.

  "You look pretty tonight," I tell her and pin her between me and the truck, kissing her again.

  It's all awkward tongues and she keeps trying to take it slow, but that thing I said I needed to lose is looming. I'm a virgin, and I'd love nothing more than to be with Kinlee tonight to give me something to remember her by forever.

  "You sure about this?" she whispers, her hands gripping the belt loops of my jeans to pull me against her. That soft smile touches my lips again and I feel like I've died and gone to heaven.

  Kinlee ain't a whore. Now, I'm not claiming to know how many guys she's been with, but I know this behavior ain't her. She's drunk and I should walk away, but she's not too drunk to realize it's me in front of her.

  "You want me, baby girl?" I rub against her, hoping not to ruin this with something as stupid as calling her baby girl again...

  "I do," she hums, unbuckling my belt buckle. "Real bad." Her hand snakes into my jeans and she lets out that giggle, pushing her lips to my neck as she starts to rub my dick.

  I've gotten a hand job once, and only once, so when I feel like I'm about to lose it, I stop her and pin her hands above her head. I've seen this move in a porno. My shaking hand reaches down her skirt and I slide my fingers up between her thighs, moving a little too fast and rough. I hit her in the middle and she squeaks with a jump. Never saw that in a porno.

  "Sorry," I whisper with a shaky breath as nerves make me start to sweat.

  It ain't no wonder I'm a virgin. I never became the cool or suave cowboy most of my friends did. I stayed a red-blooded cowboy that eats, breathes, and sleeps farm life. My parents are strict and put the fear of God in me. No sex until marriage, and I thought that might be my fate, but here I am, about to sex up Kinlee Jones. My eight-year long crush.


  My dick pops out of my boxers with a bounce when I shove my pants to my knees. I try to hold her arms above her head with one hand while reaching for my wallet with the other, but I almost fall.

  "Shit, dang it, hang on." I have to let her go and move slow so I don't trip while fishing out my wallet. "I got a condom. Don't want you getting knocked up." My laugh is cut off when she covers her face with her hands.

  I'm gonna lose my opportunity. It won't be the first time, but this time's so different. This is Kinlee.

  "Here we go," I blurt, startling her because her face was still buried in her hands. "Okay, here we go." My hands shake as I try to roll the rubber down my dick that's harder than horseshoe steel.

  All set, and...I shove it in.

  "Shit," she curses, her hands gripping my shoulders. "Ah, ow! Fuck." Her nails dig in but she moans. I can't tell if it's from discomfort or pleasure but she feels too good to stop now.

  "Here we go," I keep panting and lean in to kiss her.

  My lips connect with her nose and she jerks back with a yelp. The back of her head bangs against the truck and she rubs at her nostrils that I just stuck my tongue into.

  "Oh god," I groan, embarrassed, down right humiliated, and coming at the same exact time.

  My wide eyes find hers as I go stiff. I'm not sure I even got five pumps in before I lost it. I feel my cheeks start to heat up, and I can't believe I already came. With a groan, I drop my forehead to her shoulder, stiff as a board and goin' soft inside her.

  Her hands come up to my cheeks and she lifts my head, smiling at me. The Kinlee I've loved for years shines bright. "Hey," she whispers.

  "I was a virgin!" I practically scream at her and she flinches back.

  Her eyes go wide and she lets out a chuckle before shifting away from me and adjusting her dress. "Wow," she says, biting her lip. "And now you're leaving tomorrow?"

  With no dignity, no virginity, and probably no friends 'cause if she tells anyone about this, they'll mercilessly tease me till the day I die, I tell her, "Yeah, I'm sorry about that, Kinlee. I shouldn't have done that and then just up and leave you tomorrow." I tuck myself away and shove the condom into my pocket. "But we used protection so at least you won't be a single mom."

  Her mouth pops open and she watches me, blinking slowly, but the words never come.

  "I don't mean that. And not like you'd want me to stay now anyway," I start to stammer because I've always been a bumbling idiot. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut. "I wish we did this a few years back though. I wish I wasn't a virgin. I wish I had sex with a few girls before you so I could last a little longer." I wish I would just shut the hell up, but I keep going and the little ray of sunshine just stands there staring at me, managing to smile through it all. "I love you, Kinlee." When she gasps, I wrap my arm around her shoulders. "Like a pal. Hey, can we go back to ten minutes ago when I was just goofy Bo and not this idiot?"

  She silently nods, staring at the ground. "Yeah. Sure." Her smile brightens the evening I just shot to hell. "Yeah, Bo. It's fine."

  She don't mean it and I don't want to think about it. I steer us toward Brandt and Jo, trying to act normal. I lock eyes with my best friend and he can see something's wrong, but he don't have a clue what, and he never will. Lord, I hope she never speaks of what just happened.

  The phone beeps for the second time in five minutes and I roll my eyes. "Ms. Jones, you're needed in the office."

  I push the intercom button. "I'll be right there, thanks." Looking over at Tommy, who's sitting here trying not to lose it over the small amount of blood on his leg, I smile. He scraped his knee, again, and the kid's staring at me with shiny eyes, like his world is ending. Ah, the wonderful life of a school nurse.

  "There you go, bud. Just don't go so crazy out there next time, okay?" I send him on his way back to class with a smile then huff, bracing myself for this trip to the office. Being summoned like that is never good, and it's been happening more often than not lately.

  I push into the office, the heavy wooden door slamming behind me, and I shake my head at the old building. Everything in this town's falling apart.

  "What's goin' on?"

  "He's at it again," Melissa, the secretary, says. She hits a button on the phone and hands it over the counter to me.

  "Hello? This is Kinlee." I close my eyes and press my fingers against my eyelids, knowing the route this phone call's about to take.

  "Kinlee," Mr. Bearns, the high school principal, says tiredly. "Will was found in the locker room, playing with a lighter." He sighs and I slump against the counter, shaking my head.

  "Where'd he get the lighter from?" I ask, trying to understand how my little brother's so...different. That's a freaking nice way of putting it.

  Two years ago my life imploded. My parents were instantly killed in an accident and I, at the age of twenty-three, was forced to hold what was left of my family together. I raise my sixteen-year-old twin siblings on my own. Now I'm a twenty-five year old stress case, trying to do my best. My sister, Wendy, is pretty 'normal', all things considered, but my brother...he's something else. Two years now I've been trying to figure him out, and each time I think we're getting somewhere, something like this happens and it's a step in the wrong direction. We've been taking steps in the wrong direction for a few months now, and I'm starting to worry he's never going to turn himself around.

  "I certainly didn't give it to him." Principal Bearns huffs. "The minute I walked into the room he tossed it to me and smiled. Seems like it's just a cry for attention, but he can't stay in school."

  "Please don't suspend him," I quietly beg, trying not to let the entire office hear this conversation.

  Will's been suspended enough times he shouldn't be allowed back in school. But, as it goes, we live in a small town and I've known these people since the day we moved here fifteen years ago. They're all trying to help in some way, and I hate that the most troublesome boy in town is my responsibility. I love him, but something's gotta give.

  "You gotta pick him up today, Kinlee. If this went beyond my eyes, you know I'd have no choice. Have a talk with him, will ya?"

  "Okay." I glance at the clock. "Thank you, Mr. Bearns. I'll be there in a little bit." I hand Melissa the phone, she takes it and hangs it up.

  The look on her face says enough, but she voices it anyway. "That's the fourth time you've left early for Will this month, Kinlee."

  I groan, resting my forehead on the counter. "I don't know what to do, Mel," I say, eyes closed. "I keep thinking he's gonna turn around. We have good days, and then really bad days." Her hand comes to rest on my arm and I sigh, standing up straight, then smile at her. "We're gonna get through this."

  She's smiling while her head bobs her nod, but she believes those words about as much as I do right now. "I'll let Darren know you had a family emergency."

  "Thank you," I whisper, leaving the office and grabbing my purse on the way out of the middle school where I've worked for a little over a year now.

  I was just finishing up college when the accident happened. I had big plans. But what kind of sister would I be if I weren't here doing what's right for my siblings? So, here I am. It didn't take too long to find a job with the same hours as the kids, but I don't know how much longer I'll be allowed to keep my job if I have to keep leaving like this. It's weird working with some of my old teachers, but it pays the bills for the most part, and working evenings at the diner makes up for the rest. This isn't what I wanted to do with my life, but I will put those kids before me any day. I do my best for my siblings, but unfortunately sometimes my best isn't enough.

  After a few turns of my key in the ignition, my car revs to life. This damn thing needs to get me through the next couple of years, at least until the twins start working and earn their own money, then maybe I'll be able to afford a new one. Hell, not even new. Just something a little more reliable.

  I grew up lower than low class. My daddy worked hard, but hard work at minimum wage isn't anythin
g to shake a stick at, especially when you have three kids. Sure the twins didn't come around till I was nine but there wasn't a time in my life I remember having a surplus of toys to play with or extravagant vacations or anything. Moving here was probably the most exciting thing to happen in my youth. We moved into a bigger house, but it still wasn't big enough for three kids. The Miller's farm used to butt up to our property and they would let me ride their horses, so I never minded too much. My parents raised me to be humble and appreciate everything in life. I didn't necessarily want for much, but there wasn't ever anything extra. This car I bought with money I'd saved my entire life. At seventeen, I bought it from Mr. Miller and it had a few good years left in it, but it's finally on its last leg. Yet, I don't have the money to get a new one right now.

  Throwing it into park in the high school lot, I move slowly as I climb out of the car. Each time I walk up to this big brick building, the memories of this place always get to me. This isn't a big city, by any means, but my high school class had a few hundred kids in it from neighboring towns and each one left an impression on me in one way or another. I met my best friends in these school buildings. I guess that's a good thing about small towns. I know I'll forever have memories here.

  Heading for the office, I walk past the wall of fame and stop to smirk at the young faces smiling back in all of the photos. Seven years since we were kings and queens of this place, and only one of us actually got out and did something with their life. I'll never forget the day he left, and how torn we all were to see him go, but Bo Hart had bigger things in store for him than this small town. Granted, plenty of us are happy living the simple country life. I'm happy having just enough money to pay the bills at the end of the month, but every now and then I wonder what it's like living bigger than life, like Bo is. Not that I'll ever get to attempt it. More money means more problems, my dad used to say, but sometimes it's nice to dream.

  Swinging the door open to the office, I see my brother slumped in the chair by Mr. Bearns' office and I shake my head at him.