Agatha H. and the Clockwork Princess gg-2 Read online

  There was a crackle of energy, a smell of burnt hair, and at least five square meters of rock vaporized in a ball of blue flame. Krosp stared aghast at the new crater in the hillside, which was already cooling with a series of pops and clinks. He turned to see Agatha gazing delightedly at the weapon. A thin wisp of smoke arose from the interior of the mechanism and spiraled gently into the morning sky. “Beautiful,” she whispered.

  “Very impressive,” Krosp muttered. He shook himself. “Okay. We’re done here. There’s no way we can cover that up. Let’s get going.”

  As Agatha turned, he noticed that a little brass trilobite, the traditional symbol of the House of Heterodyne[4], had been attached to one side. He pointed with one claw and gave Agatha a sidelong, questioning look. “Hmm?”

  “I found it in one of the packs. I guess it was Lilith’s. I... well, I figured if we’re going to be wandering strangers, we should at least look like we’re good guys. Lots of people wear them these days, you know. For good luck. They even sell them to tourists in Mechanicsburg, so nobody is going to see it and think we’re really connected with the actual family.”

  “Hmf.” Krosp rolled his eyes. “Except, of course, that you are.”

  Agatha sighed. “True. But the point is, nobody would guess that just because I’ve got a trilobite badge. They’ll just think: oh, look, another fan of the Heterodyne Boys.”

  She hefted the pack that held the small amount of useful supplies Krosp had been able to find in the wreckage. “I think we’re going to need to find help soon. There really wasn’t a lot here.”

  Krosp shook his head as he surveyed the site. “We’ve got the gun, some medical supplies and a little food.”

  Agatha frowned. “Not nearly enough. It won’t last long.” She remembered the exploding hillside. “And I don’t think this gun is going to be of much use unless we’re planning on hunting leviathan.”

  The cat waved his hand dismissively. “We’ll eat what I catch, and save what’s in the pack for an emergency.”

  Agatha looked at him critically. “I thought you’d never been off of Castle Wulfenbach[5].”

  “Hey, cats are natural hunters. We’re in tune with our environment wherever we go. Come on, we’ll be better hidden in that tall grass.”

  Agatha peered ahead. “Those are trees.”

  Krosp shrugged. “Whatever.”

  Several hours later, night was beginning to fall. A delicious smell filled the clearing where Agatha leaned forward over a small fire and deftly rotated a set of sticks, each of which impaled a plump, sizzling sausage. Across from her sat Krosp, sullen, his fur matted and covered with bits of leaves and mould, glowering at the fire.

  Finally, Agatha selected a sausage and nibbled at it tentatively. Satisfied that it was warmed through, she bit off the end and chewed, sighing with enjoyment. The hike had been challenging, but Agatha’s foster-parents had always insisted that anyone who spent their days in a machine shop required a stout pair of steel-toed boots as a matter of course. Today, these had served her well.

  She held out the stick invitingly. “Come on, have a sausage.”

  Krosp’s glare intensified. “Obviously, I’m not hungry.” A small growling sound from his midsection only caused his tail to lash a little faster.

  Agatha did not help. “Hey, hunting out in the real world is different. You’ll get something eventually.”

  “Of course I will. When I’m really hungry.” Krosp’s eyes were locked upon the sausage. Agatha amused herself by moving it gently from side to side and watching his eyes track it. Then she felt ashamed. She slid the sausage off the stick and onto a flat rock between the two of them, then resolutely ignored it.

  “Maybe we can find a farm. We could—”

  Krosp’s eyes jerked away from the sausage and he glared at Agatha. “No! They’d ask too many questions, and even if they didn’t, they’d remember us. People look after their own first. When the Baron comes searching for us, we’d just be strangers that passed by. They’d owe us nothing.”

  “No, we’ll try to get as far as possible while we can. When we run out of saus—uh—supplies, then we resort to asking for help.”

  Agatha nodded slowly. She pulled her glasses off and wiped them clean with her pocket handkerchief. “That’s as well thought out a plan as we’re going to get, I suppose. But at some point, we will have to talk to someone. If only to find out where we are.” She carefully failed to notice that the sausage she’d laid out had vanished. She rolled herself up in the balloon fabric and lay down with her back to the fire. “Good night, O mighty hunter.”

  Krosp sat looking away through the trees in a preoccupied manner, his cheeks bulging. As she drifted into sleep, Agatha could hear him covertly chewing.

  She was jolted awake at dawn by an exultant furry object landing hard on her stomach. She snapped her eyes open to see Krosp, his fur even messier, standing victoriously atop her blanket, waving a paw in which he clutched one medium-sized and terrified rat.

  “Breakfast!” he sang out. “Breakfast caught by me! Mrowrr! Yowwrllll! Eat eat EAT!” He thrust the rat toward Agatha and grinned with manic pride.

  Agatha stared at the rat in panic. The rat stared back. “I....” she thought quickly, “I thought you wanted us to get moving.”

  Krosp stared at her expectantly. “Yeah.” He waggled the rat back and forth in front of her face. “So hurry up! Eat!”

  Agatha closed her eyes. “I’ll just eat some more stuff from the pack.” She peeked.

  Krosp’s eyes were full of betrayal. “But... but I caught you food! Me! See? Here!” He bounced the rat around some more.

  “I’m not eating this—” Agatha thought quickly, “um... I’m not eating this raw!”

  Krosp considered this. “Mmm. You human types do kind of insist on that, don’t you.” He frowned. “I don’t want to waste time cooking...”

  Krosp moved aside as Agatha sat up. She tried to sound reasonable. “Look. Today I’ll eat from the pack. Tonight, you can catch extra—” Again, she looked at the rat. She was deep in the Wastelands, with nothing to eat in her pack but six sausages, some cheese and an old apple. The rat was still, steadily returning her gaze. Agatha’s heart sank. Well, she might have to eat them, but she would do her best to avoid saying it. “You can catch extra... erm... things, and I’ll roast them overnight on the coals.”

  Krosp eyed the rat in his paw speculatively, then nodded grudgingly. Agatha reached out and scratched behind his left ear. “And I know you can do it, ’cause you’re obviously an amaaazing hunting creature.” Her voice became a soothing croon.

  Krosp’s eyes closed in bliss as Agatha’s fingers scratched away. A small purr began to rise from his throat, then was cut short as the cat caught himself and snapped his eyes open. Suddenly, he looked serious. “Okay. Okay!” He pulled himself away from Agatha’s hand and sat down hard on a nearby rock. He looked again at the rat and sighed regretfully, then, with a perfectly horrible crunch, bit off its head. The purr returned and grew louder as the cat chewed contentedly. “But you don’t know what you’re missing,” he confided around a mouthful of rat. “The head is best raw.”

  Agatha froze at the sound of the crunch, stared in horror for several seconds, then slowly dropped the sausage she had been unwrapping back into its waxed paper wrapper. “Somehow,” she whispered weakly, as she tucked it back into her pack, “I’ll make do.”

  With the mountains behind them, they walked on through a rocky landscape, lightly wooded and crossed by the occasional stream. The countryside was beautiful in the early morning light, but neither Agatha nor Krosp was used to long marches, especially long marches that involved carrying full packs over rough ground. After the first hour, the conversation had flagged. The effort of moving as far away from the crash site as possible soon sapped their energy. The going was slow, and they stopped frequently to rest.

  Soon, the light woods began to give way to thicker forest, and Agatha noticed Krosp glaring suspi
ciously into the increasingly thick undergrowth. She realized that she had been doing the same thing. The cat was probably as jumpy as she was, she thought. Hardly surprising. Neither of them had much experience with the outside World. Agatha had traveled a bit with her uncle when she was very young, but most of her life had been spent within the sheltering walls of the university town of Beetleburg. Krosp was a young cat, most likely born in a laboratory on Castle Wulfenbach. His life had been spent entirely on board the Castle.

  Agatha smiled at the odd thought that this was the first time the cat had ever walked on the actual surface of the earth. Still, even her limited acquaintance with Krosp told her that he was no fool. They hadn’t had time to discuss much beyond the best way to escape Castle Wulfenbach for good, but from various things Krosp had said, she understood that the cat had spent much of his time on Castle Wulfenbach reading books on military history, strategy and tactics, and studying maps of old battles. He had the mind of a furry little general, and was most likely imagining an enemy in every thicket—and planning what to do if it attacked.

  As she marched, Agatha could feel the tension growing throughout her body. Her chest felt tight and the back of her neck and shoulders throbbed. She took a deep breath and pondered the situation.

  The threat of aerial pursuit from Castle Wulfenbach made her fear the sky and the open spaces, so she was glad of the cover the forest provided. On the other hand, the sinister reputation of the Wastelands made her wary of the shadows under the trees and the crevices in the rocks. Although they saw no animal larger than a crow all morning, occasional cries and rustlings in the brush told of larger creatures nearby. These were, most likely, ordinary wild animals about their morning business—but the possibility of something more unusual made her imagination race.

  To take her mind off the thought of phantom monsters lurking in the bushes, Agatha turned her mind to the more concrete danger that faced her. There would be pursuit from Castle Wulfenbach, she was sure. That the Baron would simply allow her to leave quietly was too much to hope for.

  Agatha had just been rather dramatically revealed to be the daughter of the house of Heterodyne. Her father and uncle had been the near-messianic duo of heroic Sparks known as the Heterodyne Boys. Stories of their adventures and heroism had caught imaginations across the continent. Like it or not, Agatha’s mere existence had the potential to shake the Baron’s hold on Europa, and he knew it. No, Baron Wulfenbach would not leave her be.

  Agatha remembered the stricken look that had crossed the man’s face when he had realized who she was, and shuddered. And his reaction after that, his determination to keep her not only a prisoner, but sedated... the Baron clearly believed her to be extremely dangerous. The only mystery was why he didn’t simply want her dead.

  And then there was the Baron’s son... he didn’t seem likely to let her be, either... but that line of thought made her feel strange, and slightly pained, so she pushed it out of her mind—shaking her head hard to chase away the unwelcome thoughts.

  She had been watching the ground as she hiked, now she looked up at the trees ahead of her. They had come through the thickest part of the forest, and were making their way along a gentle hill that ran down into a wide green valley. They spotted a river below, glinting behind the trees.

  “We’ll follow that downstream as long as we can.” Agatha decided. “I know you don’t want to be seen, but we can’t live in the Wastelands forever. I need to get to Mechanicsburg, and I don’t see how I can manage that if I don’t even know where it is. With any luck, that river will lead to a town where we can get information without being too conspicuous.”

  Krosp harrumphed softly, and gave this some thought. “Hm. Yes, I suppose I could manage some reconnaissance in a town. That was part of my creator’s reasoning when he designed me, actually.”

  Krosp was silent for a few more seconds, pondering, then seemed to gain enthusiasm for the idea. “Yeah. This could be fun. Heh. I’ll sneak around, find out where we are, steal us a map to Mechanicsburg, and catch us some wily sausages while I’m at it! Mrowr!”

  Agatha was pleased to see that the thought cheered the cat considerably. As he marched, Krosp hummed softly with an occasional “Hmmm... yes...” and his tail twitched slightly as he plotted his cunning attack on some unsuspecting village. Agatha smiled. She was feeling a bit better, too. It was good to have a plan.

  They were making their way through a sun-dappled stand of birch trees when a stifled sob brought both Agatha and Krosp up short.

  “Did you hear that?” Agatha whispered. Krosp nodded. A rustling sound caused them both to look up into the branches over their heads. Perched in the crook of a tree was a small boy. He was about eight years old, dressed in a well-worn homespun outfit, complete with a dashing green cap. His feet were bare, but if the calluses were any indication, this was their normal state. Tears glistened at his eyes. When he realized that the two below had seen him, he froze into immobility.

  Agatha waved up at him. “Hello! Don’t worry, we’re not going to hurt you.” She looked around. There was no sign of human habitation near by. “Where are your parents?”

  The boy slumped a bit. “I don’t know. I was playing, and now I can’t find my way back.” By the end of this statement, his voice had begun to quaver.

  Krosp looked at him speculatively, showing a small amount of tooth. “Really. Well, well. Our search for provisions might be over.”

  Ugh. Well, the cat was a monster created by a twisted mad scientist. Apparently he had learned all about military strategy, but still needed some lessons in manners. Agatha clouted him sharply on the head. “No!”

  Krosp looked offended. “What?”

  Agatha lowered her voice. “We’re the good guys, remember? We do not eat children. We do not even threaten to eat children. He is not ‘Provisions.’”

  Krosp’s ears flattened. “Whaaaat?! Why not? It’s up in a tree! Maybe it’s a bird!”

  “He talks!”

  “Lots of things talk! Maybe it’s a parrot!”

  “He’s not a bird!”

  Krosp looked back up at the now fascinated boy. “Squirrel?” he hazarded.

  This caused the boy to burst out in a fit of giggles. The girl and cat looked up at him in surprise.

  “I didn’t know you were show people!”

  Krosp looked at Agatha in confusion. “Show people? What’s that? Can you eat them? Back on the Castle, Dr. Sanian had these little guys in jars, and they...” Agatha cut him off with another light cuff to the back of the head.

  The boy nodded. “Whoo! Yeah! That’s a great talking cat act! Hit him again!”

  Agatha glared at Krosp. “I might.”

  “Hey!” Krosp stepped back and tripped over a log. He rolled over backward with his feet in the air, then leapt around in one twist and began licking a paw while glaring up at Agatha defensively.

  At this the boy applauded and leapt from the tree. He hit the ground in a perfect tumbler’s roll, turned another somersault and a cartwheel, then bounced to his feet in one fluid movement. At the end of this performance, he held his arms out wide and shouted: “Ta-dah!” He held the pose, grinning, as if waiting for applause.

  Agatha nodded. “So your parents are show people—” She paused. “uh... too?”

  The boy nodded. “Yup. Master Payne’s Circus Of Adventure!”

  Agatha was impressed. The way the boy said it, she could hear the capital letters. “So you don’t actually live around here?”

  “Nope. Just passing through! Like cheap beer! Ba-dum-bum!”

  Agatha blinked. “I... I beg your pardon?”

  The boy shrugged. “That’s what my daddy always says. You can meet him when you take me home!”

  Agatha looked helplessly at Krosp. “We’ll try.”

  Krosp finished smoothing his fur, twitched his tail, and sighed. Then he effortlessly flowed up the tree. He closed his eyes and swiveled his head and ears while breathing deeply. Suddenly he froze and po
inted. “I smell campfires and horses, and I can hear people calling from that direction.” He opened his eyes. “Is your name Balthazar?”

  The boy nodded. Krosp made little shooing motions in the direction he’d pointed. “Fantastic. Off you go. Good luck, kid.”

  Agatha hoisted up her gun and the two headed off. “All right, then. Let’s get you back to your family.”

  “Huzzah!” the boy cried, throwing one fist into the air as he marched along.

  Krosp stared after them and then, with a hiss, scrabbled back down the tree. He bounced directly into Agatha’s path. “Hey! Whoa! No people, remember?”

  Agatha stepped around him. “I’m not going to send him off by himself.”

  “Why not? He got here by himself!”

  “And besides, he’s already seen us, and we do need that information.”

  Krosp practically hopped up and down in frustration. “But I was going to be all sneaky!” he yowled.

  The boy shook his head in admiration as he passed. “That is the greatest cat ever.”

  Krosp glared at him, then sighed and followed.

  Soon, they broke through a surrounding border of blackberry brush and found themselves on the flood plain near the river. The well-preserved remnants of a Roman road wound past, and an ancient stone bridge arced gracefully over the water.

  Encamped there was a collection of mismatched vehicles arranged in a rough circle. Most were normal circus caravan wagons, extravagantly carved, gaudily painted and adorned with all kinds of banners and odd decorations. Traveling shows of all kinds visited Beetleburg, and Agatha had always attended as many as her guardians had allowed, but even so she was impressed by the variety before her.

  One of the wagons appeared to be constructed from parts of an ornate locomotive. Steam gently poured from its large smokestack. Another had no wheels at all, but rode below a small blimp, suspended by a network of ropes. Some of the wagons were constructed of odd materials, some were built in strange configurations, but all were brightly colored, proclaiming the wonders they carried and abilities of their owners. Even now, merely paused in the middle of a field, Agatha thought it one of the most impressive-looking shows she had ever seen.