Confessions of an Heiress Read online

  11 IF YOU’RE HAPPY, WEAR PINK. If you’re depressed, wear black. Black is for people who don’t want to have fun with clothes and who are always hiding—in other words, depressed. No one with a truly great body wears black, trust me. And if you really want to stand out and be confident, wear white.

  12 MAKE PLANS, PLANS, AND MORE PLANS. Invite everyone you know to come along. If there aren’t enough hours in the day, don’t worry, there will be. You live in a different time zone: Heiress Time.

  13 ACT DITZY. LOSE THINGS. It throws people off and makes them think you’re “adorable,” and less together than you really are.

  14 IF ALL ELSE FAILS, ACT BORED. Not boring. There’s a huge difference.

  15 PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION ARE OKAY, in limited amounts, but only with your serious boyfriend, because that’s exactly what someone with a famous family name is NOT supposed to do. It makes other boys think you’re dangerous, so they will all want you, too. Guys like women they’re a little afraid of. No, make that a lot of afraid of.

  16 ALWAYS HAVE A VERY BIG BODYGUARD. It intimidates guys. If a guy does have the nerve to approach you when your bodyguard is around, you know he’s got to be pretty fearless.

  17 ALWAYS HAVE A TAN. It looks like you’ve been in an exotic (i.e., expensive) place. It can never look fake, even if it is. Get the spray-on tan, so it doesn’t get all over your clothes.

  18 CHANGE YOUR HAIRSTYLE ALL THE TIME. Everyone expects you to have the same hairstyle in every photo, and only dull people do that. Tell everyone you’re wearing hair extensions even if you aren’t, because they don’t expect you to tell them.

  19 NEVER DRINK DIET SODA. It shows you have no nerve. Only drink real colas, caffeine-packed energy drinks, or Vitamin Water. Hate champagne, because that’s what everyone expects you to love. Energy drinks are the best party drinks. You never get tired. You never have a hangover. And you can make fun of all the loaded people who think they’re clever but are really acting stupid.

  20 FEAR NOTHING—except insects. And sweaty guys who insist on kissing you when they come up to say hello. There’s nothing worse than a sweaty guy who kisses you on both cheeks. Once is bad enough, but to have to go through it twice is really two times too much.

  21 NEVER BE PREDICTABLE. Always surprise people. That way, they will never get tired of you.

  22 IF THE MEDIA PLAYS WITH YOU, WELL, PLAY WITH THEM. I went on Saturday Night Live soon after my name was in the headlines every day for something I wasn’t too proud of, and which had really upset my family. On “Weekend Update” with Jimmy Fallon, the script had him asking me, “Is it hard to get a room in the Paris Hilton? Is it roomy?” and he wanted to cut it. But I wouldn’t let him. No way. That was the funniest line. And I got the upper hand with the media the moment he said it on national TV. That’s when it all clicked and things started to change. People knew I could laugh at myself, and that one bad incident was not going to make me lock myself in my room.

  23 LAST BUT NOT LEAST: MAKE FUN OF YOURSELF. NEVER TAKE YOURSELF, OR RULES, TOO SERIOUSLY (see all above rules).

  My List of Twelve Things on Heiress Would Never Do:

  1. BE MEAN TO ANIMALS.

  2. HAVE ROOTS IN HER HAIR. OR AT LEAST, EVER LET ANYONE SEE THEM. IT’S JUST NOT COOL. IT’S UGLY AND UNNECESSARY. IF YOU’RE BUSY, GET THE COLORIST TO COME TO YOUR HOUSE.

  3. GO OUT THE NIGHT AFTER THE OSCARS.

  4. GO OUT WHEN IT’S RAINING, UNLESS YOU HAVE A GUCCI UMBRELLA.

  5. TALK ABOUT MONEY. IT’S BORING, AND ONLY AGENTS, LAWYERS, AND MANAGERS SHOULD EVER TALK ABOUT MONEY.

  6. GO ON THE ATKINS DIET. OR THE SOUTH BEACH DIET. EVEN IF YOU ARE IN SOUTH BEACH. ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE IN SOUTH BEACH. IF YOU ARE IN SOUTH BEACH, EAT MORE.

  7. EAT CAVIAR ALL THE TIME. IT’S JUST WHAT PEOPLE EXPECT. CAVIAR IS FOR WANNA-BES.

  8. CARRY YOUR OWN LUGGAGE.

  9. SPEND THE SUMMER IN NEW YORK. OR THE WINTER IN THE HAMPTONS.

  10. STAND IN LINE FOR A MOVIE. IT’S ALL ABOUT PRIVATE SCREENINGS.

  11. WEAR AN OUTFIT ANOTHER GIRL HAS BEEN PHOTOGRAPHED IN.

  12. LISTEN TO ANYONE ELSE’S RULES FOR BEHAVIOR—EXCEPT MINE!

  Three Things Most People Think Heiresses Shouldn’t Do, But I Think They Should:

  1. GO OUT WITH BROKE GUYS. MONEY DOESN’T MATTER IF THEY’RE NICE ENOUGH.

  2. DANCE WITH NO SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.

  3. ACCEPT FREE STUFF. IF PEOPLE WANT TO GIVE IT TO ME, WHY SHOULDN’T I TAKE IT? I LOVE IT!

  My sister, Nicky, is three years younger than I am, but we were raised like twins. We look a lot alike; my mom, Kathy, always dressed us alike; and since our two baby brothers (Barron and Conrad) are so much younger, Nicky and I grew up together. We always felt like we were the same age. We bonded over animals, which we both love, dolls, clothes, living in Los Angeles and the Waldorf-Astoria in New York, and the fact that we knew we were special and different. We were like a couple of cute blond Eloises running around the Plaza, except it was the Waldorf Towers, and it wasn’t fiction.

  I remember getting really excited when I found out my mom was pregnant. I was three, an only child, and I hoped it would be a girl. I was never jealous of Nicky after she was born. I was happy to have someone close. So many of my friends were only children, and many of them had divorced parents—so I definitely knew how lucky I was to have a sister and both parents around all the time.

  We were a really close family, and that hasn’t changed. I know it’s unusual these days, and I definitely appreciate it and don’t take it for granted. Even though Nicky is a little quieter than I am, and probably more serious, we’ve always had fun together and trusted each other in a world where it can be really hard to trust people. I don’t know what I’d do without my sister. If it wasn’t for her, I would have grown up pretty lonely. Instead, I always had a best friend. That’s probably why I always feel confident. She made me feel even luckier than I already was.

  Even when we fight, which, of course, we do occasionally, we’re still super-close. All sisters fight, right? That’s probably the only way Nicky and I are normal. When we were little, we’d fight over silly stuff—like if I would swear, she’d tell my mom. That made me so mad. I had to teach her not to tell. I would pull her aside and explain that it was us against them, that we two girls were a team. What’s that line about divide and conquer … or something? Anyway, after that, she figured it out—we had to stay loyal to each other. Generally, we fight less than most sisters.

  In fact, we’ve lived together in Hollywood for the last few years, since she was eighteen. We have a lot of the same friends; some different ones, of course, but our worlds mostly overlap when it comes to work. We’re very into creating things now, and we’ve become pretty business-minded. We like performing. Nicky’s doing some television hosting; during this year’s Golden Globes and Academy Awards, she was on the red carpet for E! She has her own handbag line, which does particularly well in Japan—Nicky’s are the best-selling handbags in Japan; the Japanese love us. We go there every couple of months to do promotion and photo shoots.

  One of my favorite things to do with Nicky is to go with her to Japan. There’s amazing shopping, it’s fun, and the people are all really sweet. We have a ton of fans over there. Nicky and I have to wear black wigs, and we can’t even walk next to each other! There’s a shopping center in Tokyo we love to go to, but we have to split up so we’re not followed by hordes of people. I start on the top floor, she starts on the bottom, and we meet in the middle. Even with wigs on, if we’re together, they know it’s us. We got caught in the corner of a store once, and it was insane. People were screaming and acting like maniacs when they saw us! Which is crazy, because the Japanese are mostly so polite and friendly.

  Yes, we’re the Hilton Sisters, always talked about together in one breath. A sister act. Anything that happens to me happens to her. However, now that I’ve done The Simple Life and Nicky has dyed her hair, people don’t associate us with
each other as much as they used to. I love her dark hair. It looks amazing on her. Of course, it made everyone say that she wanted to separate herself from me, but I know that she just wanted to try something different. She’s got beautiful blue eyes, so dark hair looks great on her. She’d been talking about dyeing it brown for so long, and she finally did it. And I think it looks better on her than blond. I would never do it, unless it was for a movie and I had to. I love being blond. It’s a big part of my identity. But then, so is Nicky. And I love that.

  My Earliest Memories of Nicky

  I remember living in Bel Air when Nicky and I were three and six, and we used to fly down the driveways on Rollerblades. We didn’t know how to stop, so we’d go crashing into anything. We were pretty animated. Mom had this high bed and we’d climb on top of it and jump off. We definitely liked to perform, too. Nicole Richie’s dad, Lionel, had a jukebox, and we would lip-synch the songs it played. Nicky, Nicole, and I would put makeup on and dance to Tina Turner, Whitney Houston, Madonna, and Prince. We would get all decked out in my mom’s clothes and jewelry, then we’d do the show at parties for our parents. It was pretty cute!

  Nicky and I always went to the same schools. My mom made sure we were always together, and we continued to dress alike into our early teens. I think my mom thought it would give us more confidence, and she was right. She always bought two sizes of the same outfit if she liked it, so we wouldn’t get jealous of each other’s clothes.

  In school, I loved art class and Nicky loved writing, so we’d help each other with homework. We never, ever liked the same guy. Some sisters do, but we never did, luckily. That would be a total drag. We like different types of guys. Nicky and I have opposite taste.

  I remember this funny story from when we were about five and eight: Nicky’s godfather, Parviz, was my dad’s best friend. He would always give her a hundred dollars on her birthday. (Where was my hundred dollars?) I soon realized that if I got a toy that Nicky wanted, I could sell it to her for the hundred dollars! She was sooo young and looked up to me, so she went along with it. Then I’d buy another toy for myself and keep her money. I have to admit, I feel bad about that now.

  Nicky and I got the shopping bug pretty early. I remember we would put a table in front of our bedroom door and make a little shop. We’d pretend to sell stuff to our parents and their friends, and we’d want real money! I guess that was my first memorable experience with stores and shopping. It sure wasn’t the last.

  “The only person who really knows me is Nicky.”

  When we were on the verge of becoming teenagers, Nicky and I started getting into trouble. Not big-time trouble, just your normal kid stuff, though we always thought it was a big deal when it happened. Like a lot of our friends, we’d make prank phone calls, leave messages for dogs on answering machines, and silly stuff like that. Then we’d play “school,” and I’d always get to be the teacher because I’m the oldest of all the cousins. Once, I remember, I made the “class” say the Pledge of Allegiance—which would have been cute, except I put it through our house’s P.A. system and it went all over the house, and kind of surprised everybody. And when Nicky and I would play that we were royalty, I’d always be the queen, and I’d make her be the princess. But it seems to me now that all older sisters do stuff like that. Age is much more obvious when you’re kids.

  Then, when we were a little older and lived in the Waldorf, we once dressed up and snuck into a ball—no one knew it was us. We’d dance around and act all cute, and it didn’t occur to anyone to throw us out. I think the hotel staff was afraid of us, even though we were just children.

  All Grown Up Together

  When Nicky was eighteen, she wanted to leave New York and move to L.A. I was living in Hollywood, and I had just broken up with my then-boyfriend. I didn’t want to be by myself in Hollywood Hills, and because I travel a lot, I wanted someone to watch my animals. So I convinced Nicky to move in with me. It’s so nice to have her here, to have someone to talk to and watch a movie with. She’s the perfect roommate because I can just be myself—and I can trust her. You can’t trust anyone the way you can trust a family member. Plus, it’s always fun to make an entrance at a party with Nicky. She always tells me the truth about which outfit looks best. And not many people know this, but my sister is one of the funniest people you’ll ever meet.

  Even though we’re alike in so many ways, we’re different in one crucial aspect: She’s better at shopping than I am. Hard to believe, I know! But I get bored fast, and I wear more costumey clothes—wild, crazy, funky stuff from all kinds of shops on Melrose or downtown Manhattan. Nicky’s more sophisticated—she only wears high-fashion designers, and she prefers bigger, fancier stores. Nicky is one of the best-dressed women I know. At the age of fifteen, she was voted by Vogue one of the best-dressed women in the world! And lately, I find myself dressing more and more like her. However, neither of us mind if we happen to like the same outfit, and each of us will get one. We don’t really share clothes because, while she trusts me with a lot of things, she doesn’t trust me not to ruin her outfits! That might seem a little excessive, but it does prevent fights.

  Nicky’s a little more strict and uptight with her friends than I am, and she’s definitely shier. I’m nice to everybody, which attracts a lot of people. Nicky doesn’t like to be around a ton of people, and she doesn’t like all of my friends. That’s okay. I’m always happy to be in the eye of the storm, but I get that she’s not. It’s not for everybody. But my sister rocks, and I never have as much fun with anyone as I have with her.

  Luckily, as I said, we’ve never liked the same guy, so she’s the one girl I’ve always trusted with my boyfriends, no matter what. Our bond is stronger than any bond either of us could ever have with a guy.

  People are always asking me what kind of advice I give Nicky about guys, because I’m older and have always had boyfriends. Well, Nicky’s so smart, I don’t have to give her much advice. But I did tell her that guys are only going to want what they can’t have. No one wants the beaten-up fake Prada purse on Canal Street. Everyone wants the brand-new colorful Louis Vuitton that no one can get. Guys don’t want the girl who’s been around the block. I think girls are confused when they’re sixteen. They’ll hook up with guys and think that’s the way to get them. The girls need to learn to hold out. Everyone thinks I’ve been with so many guys, but that’s just because every time I’m seen with a guy, everyone thinks I’ve “been” with him. It’s so completely untrue, but it’s too boring to have to deny it all the time. I just have a lot of guy friends. People can think what they want. The only person who really knows me is Nicky. We’ll always be there for each other. She’s always proud of me, in the good times and the rough. And that’s a wonderful thing to know and to have grown up with.

  So if you really want to act like an heiress, try to get a good-looking sibling you can trust. That way, you’ll never have to go shopping alone, and you’ll always have somebody you can trust.

  I think fashion is in my blood. When Nicky and I were little girls, there was nothing we loved to do more than get dressed up. We would do little modeling shows at home, using our mom’s clothes, jewelry, and makeup. Our mom has always inspired our style. When we were little, we’d look at her fashion magazines and try to pose like the models. Then we’d look at each other in the mirror and laugh. But I think we knew we weren’t totally fooling around.

  I guess I started to think seriously about modeling when I was around fifteen. I was pretty flat-chested, so what else was I going to do? Most of the supermodels are small, except for a few, who probably won’t age well. I knew I had to turn being flat into a plus. I was so embarrassed to be flat-chested that I wore padded bras until I was seventeen. Now I don’t care. I’m happy to be small, because I look good in clothes. But, boy, back then I was really insecure.

  At sixteen, I asked my mother if I could model in New York. Modeling agents had approached me, and designers and photographers asked me to model all the ti
me. I would get really dressed up and go to events, and my picture started running in lots of different places. But my mom just wouldn’t let me. She was worried about what might happen to a young girl who began modeling in New York. So I didn’t start doing it professionally until I turned seventeen, and even then I didn’t do it full-time—it was more for fun.

  Fashion Shows

  I think designers were a little nervous about booking me at first because they thought of me more as a socialite than a model. But who says you can’t be both? I was very selective about which shows I was in.

  But this is something an heiress inherently knows: Always be more important than your clothes. Even on a runway. There are a lot of socialites who still don’t get this concept. Supposedly, Marilyn Monroe said that if someone complimented her dress instead of her, she’d get insulted. That’s why I don’t always wear designer clothes. I don’t want my clothes to get more attention than I do. How can you brand yourself if you’re in somebody else’s label?

  I’ve modeled for a number of designers I like, including Alvin Valley. I love the pants he makes. He uses a hairdresser, Ricardo, who did this hairstyle for me that was like a Gwen Stefani mohawk—I loved that ’do. That was one of my all-time favorites, and I love looking at the pictures from that show. For Valley’s show, I wore these cool bandeau tops, something you can’t do if your boobs are too big. I also did the Joey and T show in L.A., and Taryn Manning and Jamie Presley were in it as well. Aimee Osbourne was also in that show, so Sharon and Ozzy were in the audience.