More Than Friends Read online

  I probably don’t stand a chance after all these years. But I have to see her. I have to try. There’s no other way I can get her out of my mind.

  He stopped in front of Kassia’s apartment. His heart beating rapidly, Theo fought the temptation to call her on his cell phone and tell her he wouldn’t be visiting after all. He stood there a moment and adjusted the bouquet in his left hand.

  The door opened. Too late. The decision had been made.

  Two

  “Hi, Theo.” Kassia’s broad smile covered her face, an expression he didn’t see on her often. She stood in the doorway and twisted a dark curl around her finger.

  “Hi.” Theo had hoped Lexie would answer the door.

  “Nice roses.”

  He looked at them. “I thought so.” He felt awkward standing in the hallway. “Uh, aren’t you going to invite me in?”

  “Oh. Yeah. Sure.” Kassia lurched as though she had just been awakened from a deep sleep. She stepped aside. “Come on in.”

  “She’s here, isn’t she?” he said in a low voice.

  Kassia nodded. “She got here a couple of hours ago,” she answered in a stage whisper. “She’s hardly had time to settle in yet.”

  Just then Lexie called from the next room. “Who’s that, Kassia?”

  Lexie! He’d forgotten the sweetness of her voice. Without warning, emotions he thought he would never again experience rose to the surface.

  “Is it the delivery man?” Light footfalls approached the living area, bringing the sound of her voice closer. “I’m still expecting a few things—” In an instant she stood at the entrance to the kitchen. The woman he loved! He took in a breath. Theo knew his love for her had never died.

  As soon as her blue gaze met Theo’s stare, she stopped.

  “Lexie!” The voice coming out of his mouth sounded eager. Too eager.

  He fought the impulse to run toward her. His hand, still holding the roses, jerked in an awkward motion. First he held them out toward her, then pressed them back against his chest. Their freshman psychology professor would have said the gesture reflected Theo’s inner debate.

  “Theo.” Instead of the look of pleasure he longed to see, Lexie’s face revealed a combination of surprise, discomfort and—could it be—fear?

  “Hello.” Theo snapped out of his dream state. His second greeting sounded much more restrained than his initial outburst. He swooshed the flowers behind his back.

  Lexie turned her attention to Kassia. “What is he doing here?” Her tone seemed almost accusatory.

  A sheepish expression covered Kassia’s face. “I, uh, I invited him.”

  “As soon as Kassia told me you’d be coming in today, I decided I’d like to take you both out to dinner. Sort of like a ‘welcome home’ celebration,” Theo added.

  “You did?” Kassia asked. “Oh, how nice of you, Theo.” She turned to Lexie. “Isn’t that nice of Theo?”

  He wished he hadn’t let his emotions carry him away, but he tried to make the best of the situation. “I thought we could go to that seafood place on Cary Street where we always wanted to eat but could never afford. Remember that?”

  “Oh, I remember.” A nervous titter sprang from Kassia’s lips.

  Theo took a moment to drink in Lexie’s appearance. He wouldn’t have thought it possible, but she looked even more beautiful now than she had in college. Her hair had grown a few shades darker, just enough to accentuate her creamy skin. Her hair no longer fell to her waist, a fact he noted with regret. Instead she wore it in a shoulder length flip that somehow managed to look retro and up to date at once. The style became her, he realized. Framing her face, it drew more attention to her blue eyes and pert nose. The bone structure of her heart shaped face looked more prominent than before, but the soft sleeveless turtleneck and blue jeans she wore revealed she hadn’t lost so much weight as to appear gaunt. In fact, she epitomized perfection. Just perfect. But then maybe she always had been.

  “I’ll even treat you both to the most expensive dinner on the menu. Won’t it be great, after all this time? We won’t have to pinch pennies or argue over how to split the bill,” Theo said.

  “I don’t know if I have to eat the most expensive thing on the menu, but I sure could go for some surf and turf,” Kassia said. “How about you, Lexie?”

  Instead of brightening into an anticipated smile, Lexie’s face darkened, and her mouth set itself in a thin line. “Thanks for thinking of me, but I really can’t go.”

  Why not? Theo waited for her to offer a valid excuse, but instead she folded her hands across her chest, raising a silent but visible barrier.

  “That’s the first time I’ve known you to turn down a free dinner,” Theo joked.

  His jesting did nothing to lighten Lexie’s countenance or mood.

  “That’s just it, Theo. You don’t know me anymore.” He didn’t like her edgy tone.

  “That doesn’t mean—”

  Her face and expression softened with apology. “I’m sorry, but I can’t go with you to dinner. Thanks for the offer.” She tilted her head toward her roommate. “Why don’t you go ahead with Kassia and have a nice time?” Before Theo could protest, Lexie retreated into the bedroom and shut the door behind her with a thud.

  “What’s the matter with her?” Theo asked.

  “I don’t know. I have no idea why she’s acting like this. Maybe she’s just tired.” Kassia shook her head so hard her curls moved back and forth.

  “Or maybe I moved too fast,” Theo wondered aloud. “Maybe I should have waited for her to settle in before trying to meet again. Or inviting her anyplace.” He brightened at a thought. “Should I try again in a couple of days? Maybe this coming Saturday?”

  Kassia shook her head. “I’m not so sure even that would help.”

  Theo dropped his arm to his side, leaving the roses facing the floor. They looked as dejected as he felt. “Oh.”

  “Look—it’s not you,” Kassia explained. “It’s Lexie. For some reason she has this idea she can’t see you because of Curt. As if she’s being unfaithful or something.”

  “Unfaithful? That’s ridiculous.”

  “I think so, too. I’d hoped that seeing you would change her mind.”

  “Maybe she’s disappointed with how I’ve changed since she last saw me.”

  Kassia looked him up and down in an exaggerated manner. “I don’t think so.”

  Theo grinned. He and Kassia had been friends too long for them to entertain any romantic notions toward each other. “Thanks for the boost. I needed that.”

  “You’re welcome.” She sighed. “Maybe I overreacted when I told you not to try later. Why don’t you? She’s been through a lot. I’m sure she’ll be in a better frame of mind once she settles in.”

  “Yeah.” Theo had his doubts. He handed Kassia the roses. “Here. Why don’t you enjoy these at least? There’s no point in letting them go to waste.”

  “They’re beautiful. I wish they really were for me.” Kassia sniffed one of the blooms. “These just might be your ticket.”

  “Really? If she turns down a free dinner that easily, she must be a pretty hard nut to crack these days.”

  “You’d be surprised how far a few roses can take you, even with independent, modern women.” Kassia disappeared into the kitchen with the flowers.

  In her absence he studied the familiar living room. Kassia hadn’t acquired much in the way of décor since school days. She had upgraded the old nineteen-inch television set that had been in her dorm room to a larger screen, and the computer looked new. Other than that she had the same furniture, a mixture of castoffs and cheap bookshelves he had helped her cart in when she first rented the place after graduation. The sameness offered a bit of comfortable familiarity in an ever changing world.

  “Are you still up for that surf and turf?” Theo called.

  Kassia reappeared with the roses, which she had placed in a cut-glass vase with water. “You don’t have to do that. You came to see Lexie, not me.” She held the roses toward him. “Don’t these look even more beautiful arranged in the vase?” She smiled and set them on the end table beside the sofa.

  “Yes, if I do say so myself. And just to compliment you on your fine talent as a florist, I’ll take you to dinner as I promised.”

  She looked toward the kitchen. “Well, I hadn’t made any other dinner plans, so a good meal out sounds like a plan. Are you sure?”

  “Sure, I’m sure. Hey, I’m not as nice as you’d like to think. I have a motive,” he confessed. “I have to eat, too.”

  Kassia laughed. “You convinced me. Surf and turf it is.”

  ❧

  Loneliness wrapped itself around Lexie when she heard the door shut behind Theo and Kassia. She had overheard enough of their conversation to realize they had gone to the restaurant without her.

  Why did she have to be so stubborn and turn down a perfectly good meal and let Kassia go out alone with Theo? And why did a feeling of discomfort tug at the pit of her stomach? She’d told them to go without her. They had every right to take her up on her suggestion.

  She grimaced. Who cared about the meal? She’d missed Theo’s company—or lack thereof. Seeing him again brought forth unexpected feelings—feelings she had long forgotten. She wished she hadn’t passed up the chance to spend time with him again, to renew their friendship, or maybe—

  She shook such unwelcome thoughts out of her head.

  Well, fine. If they wanted to go out and have a good time together and leave her alone, fine. Fine with her. She felt in no mood to put on a good face and engage in idle chitchat in a public place. Not tonight.

  She made her way into the small kitchen and inspected Kassia’s refrigerator. Only a half head of lettuce, a few carrots, and a carton
of skim milk occupied the shelves. Maybe she should have gone out for seafood after all.

  She opened the freezer and counted six frozen burritos. Bingo! She popped an extra spicy beef and bean burrito in the microwave. While she waited, Lexie stared at the apartment door.

  Inviting Theo to visit on the first day she arrived in town? How could she forgive Kassia for ambushing her like that?

  Better yet, how could she forgive herself for her silent reaction to seeing him again? Her heart betrayed her with its rapid beating and its sudden yearning.

  The years had barely touched Theo. Sun streaks from summers as a lifeguard had given way to a natural brown. She realized she liked the way Theo’s hair looked with his eyes, the color of fine mahogany. And from the way his orange polo shirt draped across his chest, Theo hadn’t missed too many days at the gym. If only—

  The phone rang. Lexie rushed to answer, hoping it was Piper. “Hello?”

  “Mommy?” The voice removed all doubts about her decision to stay home instead of going out with Kassia and Theo.

  “Piper!” Lexie smiled into the phone. “Yes, Honey, it’s me! Have you had a good day with Grammy and Pops?”

  “Yep!” Piper began a long story about her day with her grandparents. Apparently she had made friends with the other little girls in the park and had seen someone from Sunday school.

  “Did you play on the swings?”

  “Yeah! Grammy doesn’t push me as high as you do, though.”

  Lexie imagined her little girl, blond hair flying in the breeze, begging her grandma to push her higher. “I know you had a good time all the same.”

  “Yeah! Grammy let me have money for the gum machine. I got a bracelet.”

  “That sounds like fun. I miss you. Do you miss me?”

  She hesitated. “A little bit.”

  “I miss you a lot bit.” Lexie chuckled. “I know you’re having fun with Grammy and Pops. I don’t get to have fun the way you do.”

  “When are you coming home, Mommy?”

  “Soon.” Her heart lurched. They would be together in a matter of weeks. The time could not pass quickly enough for Lexie.

  “Grammy wants to talk,” Piper said. “I’m gonna hand her the phone now. Don’t hang up, okay?”

  “All right, Honey. I love you! Here’s a big smooch.” Lexie made a kissing sound into the phone.

  “I love you, too, Mommy.” Piper smacked her lips back. “Here’s Grammy.”

  She assured her mother that everything in her life was humming along at a smooth pace, then hung up a few moments later. She remained fixed in the chair. Piper’s feelings came first.

  Then why did Lexie feel so confused?

  Three

  The next afternoon Lexie was humming the chorus of a melody as she sorted laundry in her room.

  “I’m home,” Kassia called.

  Lexie heard the door shut behind her friend. “I’m in here,” she responded, knowing Kassia could follow her voice in the small apartment. “I’m doing a load of reds so a dress I want to wear to work will be clean. I’ll be glad to throw in anything of yours. Well, except maybe whites. Unless you want them to turn out pink.”

  “Cute,” Kassia replied from the hallway. “I’ll look and see.” Moments later, she entered Lexie’s room, a few red items in her hand. She threw them in the small pile. “Thanks.” She smiled. “You seem to be in a better mood today.”

  “You said it.” Lexie threw a scratchy red broadcloth blouse in the pile of red, orange, and magenta clothing.

  “So you’re not mad at me?”

  “Mad at you? What for?”

  “You know what for. For going without you last night. I would have apologized to you after I got home, but you were already asleep.”

  “I went to bed early.” Lexie turned to Kassia. “I admit I was a little annoyed, but then I realized I have no right to be mad. You and Theo invited me to dinner. I was the one who wouldn’t go.”

  “You may as well have been there,” Kassia said. “Theo couldn’t stop talking about you all night.”

  “He couldn’t?” The unsettling emotions she had felt the previous night returned.

  “No. I could tell that seeing you again had an effect on him.”

  “Really?” Lexie blurted out. “He’s not hoping for—?” How could she express herself without sounding like a total egomaniac?

  “You mean,” Kassia asked, smiling, “he’s not hoping for a romance?”

  Her face flushed hot. “Or anything else, I guess.”

  “I don’t know,” Kassia answered. “But I think he was pretty disappointed you didn’t go out with us. You know, it wouldn’t have hurt to give him a chance.”

  “I might seem harsh to you, but there are things you don’t know.”

  “Like what?”

  Lexie felt no desire to elaborate. Besides, if she argued with her friend, Kassia would defend Theo. Then she would insist that Lexie spend time with him. She refused to consider any relationships based on guilt. She harbored enough remorse over her husband’s death to last a thousand lifetimes.

  “Well?”

  “Let’s just say it’s a good thing I didn’t go,” Lexie said. “Mom and Dad called while you were gone. I got to talk to Piper.”

  “I know you wouldn’t have missed that for the world.” Kassia smiled. “She’s probably having a great time being spoiled by her grandparents.”

  “You’re not kidding.” Reviewing the hamper’s contents, Lexie decided her orange capri pants were bright enough not to be affected by the dyes in the rest of the load. She scooped them out of the ivory-colored wicker container.

  “Are you sure about those pants?”

  Lexie studied them, then nodded. “I’ve washed them a couple of times. And I’ll be using cold water.”

  “Decisions, decisions.” Kassia chuckled. “Not quite as glamorous as our real jobs, huh?”

  “I don’t know if you’d call my job glamorous, but it’s the best one I’ve ever had. Ms. Smith has given me an interesting project. Plus she doesn’t breathe down my neck all day. I really enjoy the work.”

  “That must be novel for a technical writer,” Kassia observed. The corners of her mouth turned up.

  “Very cute,” Lexie noted. “I know technical writing seems dry, especially for people who’d rather read novels.”

  “Like me.” Kassia raised her hand.

  “I know.” Lexie grinned. “But you’d be surprised at how rewarding my job can be.”

  “Oh, sure.” Kassia glanced upward. “So many instruction manuals, so little time. How many creative ways can you say, ‘Press the red button’?”

  “Technical writing actually is very creative,” Lexie said. “I look at it as helping people understand what they’ve just bought. If it weren’t for people like me, owner’s manuals would be written by design engineers, heavy on the technical jargon. If people who buy our products read the manual I write and follow the directions, they’ll be getting the most out of whatever they buy since I work the technical terms into everyday phrases.”

  “Assuming anyone actually reads the manual.” Kassia shook her head. “I hate to tell you this, but very few people get as excited about instruction manuals as you do.”

  Lexie scrunched her nose. “I know. Well, if they don’t read the directions, then it’s their own fault if they don’t understand how to use what they buy. And if they don’t learn, they’re not being the best stewards they can of the money the Lord gives them.”

  Kassia let out an exaggerated sigh. “You haven’t changed a bit, Lexie. Everything’s a sermon with you, isn’t it? I don’t see why you don’t go to seminary.”

  Lexie tossed a red-and-black patterned blouse onto a pile of similar colors. “No, thanks. Teaching Sunday school is challenging enough for me.”

  “Doesn’t sound half as exciting as what I have planned for this evening.” Kassia cocked her head to one side and looked at Lexie from the corners of her eyes.

  Lexie made a mental list of Kassia’s favorite ways to spend a night out. “Let me guess. You’re going to use the gift certificate your mom gave you for your birthday and splurge on a massage.”

  “That sounds heavenly.” Kassia closed her eyes and let out a deep sigh.

  “May I join you?”

  “Yes and no.”