Light of the Outsider Read online

  Light of the Outsider

  by

  Matthew Wayne Selznick

  The Outsider Trilogy Volume One

  The Shaper's World Cycle

  Light of the Outsider

  Published by Matthew Wayne Selznick / MWS Media, United States of America.

  First paperback edition

  First published: May, 2020

  This book is a work of fiction. Any similarity with any person, entity, location, or institution is unintentional and coincidental.

  Copyright © 2020 Matthew Wayne Selznick

  The Shaper's World, Kaebrith, Aenik, the Steadfast Capful, and related characters, entities, locations, and institutions are trade marks of Matthew Wayne Selznick. Unauthorized use is prohibited.

  All Rights Reserved. No part of the publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write the publisher at [email protected] with the subject line “Attention: Permissions Coordinator.”

  Cover painting by Tim Shepherd

  [email protected]

  Cover and interior designed by Matthew Wayne Selznick

  This e-book is provided without Digital Rights Management restrictions. It is intended for the person who purchased it. If you received this e-book through unauthorized file sharing or other methods counter to the author and publisher's intention, please consider purchasing a copy or contributing $4.00 to Matthew Wayne Selznick to help offset the hundreds of hours spent conceiving, writing, and producing this creative endeavor. Find out how: [email protected].

  Find a typo, continuity error, or other mistakes? Please contact MWS Media at [email protected] and let the publisher know! We’ll confirm it and, if applicable, correct the error as soon as possible. Thanks!

  Dedication

  Of course this is for my mother.

  She didn't get to read the last one.

  Now she can read them all.

  A Partial Shaper's World Glossary

  Alwarden ~ singular for the ruler of Aenik.

  Alwardenal ~ "Of those who rule." Usually refers to a locale or object, as in "Alwardenal Tower."

  Alwardendyn ~ collective term for the co-rulers of Aenik.

  bit ~ a measure of time. There are forty bits in a mark.

  blink ~ a measure of time. There are five blinks in a wink.

  essa ~ a thick drink distilled from fermented freshwater seagrass.

  fieldhopper ~ smaller variety of plainshopper, often domesticated by magn for transportation.

  fieldtrodder ~ quadrupedal plains-dwelling herd herbivores often domesticated by the Magn for transportation, labor, food, and materials.

  flite ~ any small, feathered creature; often semi-domesticated for their meat and eggs.

  flitething ~ a bipedal, flightless chimera of a magn child and flite; probably mythical.

  gate ~ vagina.

  gatekeeper ~ clitoris.

  glowglobe ~ thin, polished, translucent chitin filled with a bio-luminescent fungus activated by friction or agitation.

  Gundi-Mag ~ a mythical, grotesque monster used to scare children into behaving. Probably inspired by the events of the Extirpation.

  haspan ~ a measure of distance. One half of a span.

  hatala ~ in the standard calendar of the Alwarden-era Magn, a five day period. There are four hatala per tala; 16 tala per years (not counting festival years).

  magn ~ one of three sentient hominid species on the Shaper's World; best adapted to plains and grasslands with a comfortable range from sub-tropical to temperate. Irregular plural.

  mark ~ a measure of time. There are forty marks from tahwake to tahwake as measured in Aenikantag on the equinox.

  nightfaien ~ diminutive, hostile, nocturnal variety of faien; probably mythical.

  plainshopper ~ very large, herbivorous, herding plains-dwelling bipeds known for their hopping gait when at speed.

  Runai ~ the fourth day of a hatala.

  Shaper of the World, The ~ the official deity of the state religion of Aenik and much of central and western Kaebrith; patron of the Caretakers, the official state priests of Aenik.

  skink ~ any of a variety of small to magn-sized quadrupedal pack predators.

  slickslide ~ have sex.

  span ~ a measure of distance. There are 2,300 stride to a span.

  stick ~ penis (in a sexual context, "branch").

  stickwater ~ urine, specifically from a male.

  stinkflower ~ anus

  stride ~ a measure of distance. There are five hand in a stride.

  tahigh ~ the mark when tah is highest in the sky.

  tahrest ~ the period at the end of the day when tah touches the horizon. Can also refer to the gloaming -- the period from "sun" set until full dark.

  tahwake ~ dawn; after the Magn name for the Shaper's World's star, Tah.

  talonbone ~ usually used for knives and swords, the very hard keratin and bone claw of any creature. Often reinforced with chitin, or, when available, metal.

  thistleskink ~ small, ferocious quadrupedal pack predator that often dens in thick, dense, thorny underbrush.

  twighopper ~ small, semi-bipedal, arboreal herbivore; often kept as a semi-domesticated pet by magn.

  wink ~ a measure of time. There are twenty winks in a bit.

  Part One

  Chapter One

  Sot

  The invitation was a trap.

  The fact of it made Sot jittery with excitement and anxiety in equal parts.

  Especially when he thought of his role in the scheme.

  It was Lama's idea to involve Vadi. Sot didn't mind at all. If pressed, he might even admit to being grateful, though the cost was Lama drawing attention to his guarded glee more than once.

  Let her take credit for that small part of the plan. It was still Sot himself Lama had to thank for the opportunity.

  He was the one the magicker had approached. He was the one with the courage to accept the offer.

  Thanks to Sot, their lives would soon, at last, and finally, change.

  And what a change it would be. So far beyond any of their own thwarted, stillborn ambitions.

  His shoulders tensed as if expecting a blow. Even safely voiced in the dark and private space behind his own forehead, that was a poor choice of words.

  Guilt and shame, unwanted and undeserved, tightened his gut. His face must have betrayed him, for, looking past Vadi's bare, pale, smooth shoulder, Lama caught his eye and sent him the barest scowl.

  He bobbed his head just enough to signal that he got the message.

  Now was not the time for wandering off the path.

  They had a task.

  "Pardon, Vadi," he said.

  Vadi, perched with her infallible grace on one of Sot and Lama's only two stools, scooted to make way for him as he carefully squeezed between the table and the foot of the bed.

  Her voice was light and only a little over-loud from the essa she'd imbibed. "Do you want to sit down, Sot? I don't need—"

  Sot waved a meaty hand and shook his broad head. "Nah. I can sit on the bed." The wooden frame creaked beneath the straw-stuffed sleeping pad as he did so. "You're our guest, after all."

  Vadi's smile was full of big, bright teeth behind lips enticingly too full for her narrow face, which somehow still seemed unblemished and smooth as ever.

  Sot had more broken molars than not. Lama's own teeth were a yellow and brown wall held behind thinning lips that rarely parted from laugh
ter or joy.

  When Lama did attempt a grin free of sarcasm or scorn, as with the expression she cast at Vadi now, it was as if rough, unseen fingers tugged her cheeks toward her ears in an exercise unrelated to intention.

  Lama said, "A guest absent too long. We're so glad you came to see us, Vadi."

  Sot wondered if Lama deliberately tried to sound like palace folk. Vadi was born of the Shadow District just like the two of them. Did Lama hope to impress her?

  Sot watched as Vadi blushed and lowered her eyes, suddenly fascinated by the mug of essa in her hands.

  "Truth, Lama." Their long-estranged, oldest friend's voice came low and breathy. "I thought you never wanted to speak to me again." Vadi looked up at Sot through long, thick eyelashes. "And you, Sot. After so much time; with so much grown between us…"

  He knew it was appropriate, even necessary, that he should reply.

  He was too distracted by how much of her beauty she'd managed to maintain, while he and Lama were chipped and stained like their meager flatware; creaking and rough as their loveless bed.

  Too slow.

  Lama shrugged and spoke for him.

  "Sot and I… we realized you're more important to us than anyone else. More than any… thing else."

  Well, thought Sot, not everything. No denying Vadi held great value for them this particular night.

  Vadi moved to put her mug on the small table, but the plate of meat and bread (scraps from Lama's mothersbrother’s tavern, and not from today, either, though Vadi need not know that) and the big earthen jug of essa left no room.

  Lama took up the jug. "There y'go." She bent and put it on the floor at her feet.

  "Thank you." Vadi put her mug down and took Lama's hands in her own. "I hope you believe me. I never thought things would happen as they did."

  She squeezed Lama's hands, large and square and barely contained in the tiny cage of Vadi's slender fingers. "Never," she said again. "I thought…"

  She shook her head. Her thin eyebrows gathered on her brow. Sot's gaze was drawn to the way her hair shone in the unsteady lantern light. How often did they let her wash it? With what, that it glowed so?

  Vadi sighed. "I didn't know how things work. You think you can make every path come together, but then you're there and in it, and…"

  Her eyes glittered. Sot realized she was drunk.

  At last.

  Vadi blinked and smiled faintly. Her head dipped. "It's not how I thought it would be."

  Lama retrieved the jug to top off Vadi's mug. Sot was pleased to see her drink from it immediately.

  "Vadi," he said. "Vadi! You're not to blame for rough roads." Even as a sharp bark of laughter dropped from his mouth, he worried it betrayed too much bitterness; too many years of regret.

  "Besides," he said, "life on the palace staff isn't anything like how us yardies live." He looked to Lama for support.

  Lama's grin was just a little stale and hard as she arranged the table to make room for the jug. "No yard dust in your throat," she chided. "Your clothes…" She sniffed the air dramatically. "I don't smell laundry water! Sot, can you smell laundry water?"

  Sot snorted delicately as he could manage. "I can't."

  She nodded sharply. "Just what's soaked and dried on your own sorry clothes, and mine. And her fingers!" She turned Vadi's palms up. "Look, Sot! Her fingertips are pink, and not wrinkled at all!"

  "Like a baby," Sot deadpanned. He just couldn’t help himself.

  Vadi's eyes went wide. She looked quickly at Lama, who seemed unaffected by Sot’s undeniably boorish comment.

  Had this been any other night, Lama would have let fly with a volley of prickly insults and degradations ready-made to pierce his pride.

  Tonight was different.

  Tonight, there was the plan.

  Lama had no choice but to play her part.

  She did.

  "Speaking of babies," she gushed, "Vadi, share with us: do you see Ranith? Do you get to help the nursemaids care for him? What's Alwarden Deanae like with her son?"

  Vadi's apparent relief rushed from her with laughter. "So many questions! Lama, it's not like that. I'm not allowed that close to Ranith. The Alwardendyn don't really… I don't get to do anything like that."

  Lama pouted. "No? After so long? I would have thought you to practically be Deanae's left hand by now!"

  Vadi rolled her eyes. "I tell you, Lama, life inside the palace is not as you think. It's… it isn’t like any of us thought when we were children."

  Sot tilted his head and shifted so he could look at Vadi directly. "Oh?"

  "Oh, no."

  Vadi gulped from her mug. Sot glanced at Lama, whose pleasant facade looked to be slipping. It was his turn to bring her back with a pointed look.

  Vadi didn't seem to notice their silent exchange.

  "I'll tell you," she said. "My chamber ward… his name is Glin, you may have seen him? Tall and bent over like an old tree on the seashore?"

  Sot and Lama shrugged.

  Lama said neutrally, "We don't have many chances to see you palace folk, most days." She appeared to sip from her mug, but Sot saw that she only brought the essa to her lips, not beyond.

  Sot said, "Or the seashore."

  Vadi laughed. "Oh, well, who does?"

  Sot laughed agreeably while he thought about it. From the palace tower windows, perhaps, one could glimpse the sea, and not just the sluggish soup lapping at the docks beyond the Shadow District, either.

  "Anyway," Vadi said, "Glin is not kind." Her cheer seemed to waver a bit. "Not kind. Not to my mother, and not to me."

  Sot's mind gifted him with a memory of when a palace guard, walking along the top of the wall near the launderer's warren on the edge of the yard, spit on Sot's bare head.

  Not with malice, though the ranks of the guard had offered him plenty of deliberate offense over the last eight years.

  Worse.

  With no thought at all.

  That was yesterday morning.

  "Really?" Sot battled to relax the smile on his face before it rotted into a sneer. "What's the worst thing this Glin's done?"

  "He scolds us all the time," Vadi said. "Calls us shadow snipes."

  Lama said, "Well, though, Vadi… it's what we are, right? What we always will be, no matter what. Remember the fun we had as girls, running around the District and getting into all kinds of trouble?"

  Sot nodded and laughed. "Your Glin would probably be robbed in a blink if he ever stepped foot in the Shadow. Or worse!"

  Vadi pouted. "He turned the rest of the staff against us, right from the start."

  Sot looked at Lama, who was, if he knew his heartfast mate at all, fighting hard to keep cold satisfaction from her face.

  "Still," he ventured, "you sleep in a softer bed than when you were one of us yard folk. Your meals are hot, I'd wager. How bad could it be?"

  She looked at him with the hard-fought, deliberate stare of a fresh drunk.

  "Soft, but lonely, that bed." She turned to Lama. "We did have fun, didn't we? And once Sot came along..?" She raised her mug to her lips and drank deep, but never took her eyes off Lama. "I've missed the two of you so much, and the fun we had."

  "We should honor that time," Lama said, "and celebrate our reunion. We've missed you, too, Vadi."

  Sot stood up and stepped behind Vadi. He put his hands on her smooth shoulders and squeezed affectionately.

  And firmly.

  Just enough to keep her seated as Lama leaned across the table and kissed her.

  His precaution was unnecessary. Vadi returned Lama's kiss even as she reached back to seek out Sot’s meaty upper thigh.

  Lama broke the kiss and sat back on her stool, watching Vadi. Sot moved his hands to Vadi's forearms, then gently eased her off the stool and to her feet.

  Vadi pressed her back against Sot. How many long years since he'd felt another body's willing heat? His flesh well remembered her own.

  Vadi made a noise low in her throat and raised
her arms so Sot could pull her shift over her head, and off.

  "So long..!" Vadi giggled.

  Sot noted the braided cord around Vadi's neck. He saw Lama's eyes widen, confirming that the key was, indeed, hanging from that loop.

  He felt a rush of relief that fueled his confidence like a bellows to a flame. If Vadi hadn't bothered to wear the key, he and Lama would have had to resort to a far more desperate and risky second plan that, despite everything, Sot had dreaded.

  Vadi seemed to think her nakedness inspired the hunger on Lama's face, and not without cause. Had their former friend not aged at all?

  Vadi leaned back against Sot and purred, "What about you, Lama?"

  "Soon." Lama stood up and took her hands. "And when I do disrobe, you can show me everything you've learned behind the palace walls." She directed her to the bed.

  Vadi stumbled on her own feet and fell on the lumpy, coarse, sleeping pad. Concern crossed her face for a blink, and then she laughed. "Woooo! I forgot… Kug's essa is strong!"

  Lama kneeled next to the bed. "My mothersbrother brings us together once again." She swept Vadi's long hair away from her slender neck and licked below her ear, then traced her jaw with kisses until Vadi moved to meet her mouth with her own.

  Sot untied the drawstring of his trousers and let them pool at his feet, where they'd serve as thin padding between his tired knees and the cold floor. Better than nothing. He yanked off his tunic, kneeled at the foot of the bed, and put his lips on Vadi's ankle.

  His kisses led him to her gate, which he parted with his tongue.

  Vadi bucked and moaned. He put a heavy hand on her flat belly and held her there while he got re-acquainted with once-familiar territory.

  Vadi gripped Sot's fuzzy, patchy scalp with both hands and pushed his face into her groin. He had to strain to look up Vadi's body, where Lama once again focused her attention on Vadi's neck and ears. They both knew how sensitive she was.

  Lama nudged the cord around Vadi's neck with her nose and gave a mild grunt of frustration. Vadi took one hand off Sot's head and touched the wooden key on her chest.

  Lama's voice was rough and husky in a way Sot had not heard in years.