My Other Car is a Spaceship Read online

  Kalen thought for a moment. “All right. Take the pilot’s couch and monitor the energy signatures of the raider. I’ll show you what to look for. Certain energy spikes will tell you when he’s getting ready to fire his weapons. That should give us a few seconds warning and would be one less thing for me to have to pay attention to. Maybe it’ll be enough.”

  “I’m on it.” Hal sat on the pilot’s couch, which tilted back and extended somewhat like an easy chair, and Kalen activated the auxiliary viewscreen in the armrest. It was rarely used, due to the neural interface, but Adventurer had backup systems for everything.

  Kalen displayed sensor readings on Hal’s viewscreen. “Look for these specific patterns. They’ll indicate power surges in his laser and antiproton cannon systems. Let me know as soon as you see one within twenty percent of these thresholds.”

  “Roger.”

  Hal pored over his sensor readings and waited for the bogey to get within weapons range. He took a quick glance at Kalen and wished he hadn’t.

  Captain Jeffries was sweating.

  Hal swallowed and focused on his sensor readings. Less than nine minutes to weapons range.

  Kalen was more worried than he let on.

  He may be smaller than we are, but he’s got the instantaneous reaction time of a neural interface. I hope that’s not too big an advantage to overcome.

  His grip on the armrest tightened. He made a conscious effort to loosen his fingers, and then cracked his knuckles loudly. It’s important for the crew to see that the captain is relaxed and unworried—even if he’s not.

  It’s almost time.

  “We’re coming up on maximum weapons range, Captain,” Hal reported. “There’s no indication that he’s seen us. His weapon signatures are still registering in idle mode.”

  “Very good.” Kalen signaled Conflict Alert, sounding the klaxons and raising the shields.

  “I’ll fire a warning shot across his bow,” Kalen said to Hal. “Let’s see if we can scare him off, shall we?” Kalen punched some settings into his console. “Firing APC burst at minimum-power…now!”

  “That got his attention. His shields just went up.”

  Kalen toggled the radio. “Unidentified craft on a vector to Earth. This is Captain Kalen Jeffries of the Merchants’ Unity ship Adventurer. You have entered embargoed space. Turn around immediately or be fired upon. Repeat, leave this system or be fired upon. You have ten seconds to comply.”

  “The bandit is powering up weapons. Estimated eight seconds to full power.”

  “So he’s not running,” Kalen observed. “Very well, let’s try a full burst broadside. Firing APCs, now!”

  Kalen unleashed hellish energy upon the marauder, firing all four antiproton cannons.

  Take that!

  The enemy ship jinked left and evaded one of the blasts. The others splashed harmlessly off his shields.

  “Incoming! Two quems. Initiating evasive maneuvers. Everyone hang on. This could get rough. The ship doesn’t react as well with manual controls.”

  The ship bucked and spiraled as Kalen attempted to elude the shield-seeking quark-enhanced missiles, or QEMs. One missed; the other hit. Adventurer shook from the impact. Before Kalen could respond, the bogey fired APCs at the weakened spot in the shield.

  “Rotating ship and reinforcing shield. Firing slugs!” Kalen winced. “Not even close.”

  The marauder, evidently detecting the power surge to the mass driver, had pirouetted out of the path of the superdense MD slugs and returned fire with more quems.

  “Two can play that game. Take that!” Kalen fired two quems of his own, followed by a second salvo. But distracted by his offensive moves, he wasn’t quick enough on defense. Both enemy missiles detonated within meters of Adventurer’s shields, severely weakening the shield on the port side amidships and breaching the shield on the forward starboard quarter. The pirate followed up with blasts from its twin APCs, pounding at the hull where the shield had failed.

  Adventurer rocked with the force of the blows. Damage alarms sounded.

  Kalen called out, “Damage crews to decks three and five, section Blue Four!”

  He followed up via his implant with mental commands to the repairbots to head to the same areas. He spun the ship, to make it harder for the marauder to target the damaged areas. Of course, that also made it more difficult for him to accurately return fire.

  A closer scan of the bogey showed that its shields were weakened as well, due to multiple quem strikes from Adventurer. “Let’s see how you like it!” Kalen hit the marauder with more APC blasts. He was rewarded with the sight of atmosphere jetting from a ragged cavity near the stern, accompanied by a spray of debris.

  “Yeah! Direct hit—and significant damage!” Hal reported. “His engine readings are erratic.”

  “Captain!” a voice came over the intercom. “Type-26 missile detected. It’s locked on and coming fast!”

  “Damn! How does a ship that small carry missiles that large? Armory,” he yelled into the intercom, “deploy missile countermeasures, now!”

  The ship heeled over and then back as Kalen awkwardly attempted to evade the energy-seeking missile.

  “The missile’s still locked on!” Hal shouted.

  The projectile grew steadily closer despite Kalen’s best efforts to keep the ship out of harm’s way and the crew’s attempts to fool or intercept the missile.

  “Impact in eight seconds, Captain!” Hal shouted.

  “I…can’t…seem…” Kalen called out through gritted teeth, “to stay out of its way. Crew, brace for impact!”

  He continued to whipsaw the ship in random directions, trying to make the missile slip by them. He couldn’t spare the attention to fire back.

  “No good, Captain. Impact in three…two…one….”

  The ship shuddered and the lights flickered. Hal scanned his console for damage alerts. “No damage.”

  “No damage?” Kalen repeated, brows furrowed. “That doesn’t make any sense!” He paused to mop his forehead with the back of his jumpsuit sleeve.

  “A Type-26 packs a pretty big punch. What happened?”

  “I think I know,” Hal offered. “Look at the main screen.” He pointed his chin at the image of the pirate ship. “He’s hightailing it.”

  “Damn. It was just a dummy, a diversion to keep us busy while he escaped. Very clever, how he made it radiate the energy signature of a 26.”

  “Uh-oh.” Hal frowned. “Now what?”

  The bogey ejected sixty-four objects behind it, in clusters of sixteen, directly in Adventurer’s path. The objects, interlinked by graviton beams, fired up small engines and spread out to cover an area more than 1,600 kilometers square.

  “What the hell are those?”

  Kalen replied, “He’s dumped a net of gee mines dead ahead. If you get caught by one, it’s like stepping in glue. No big deal as long as we know they’re there, but it’ll slow us down going around them.”

  “Wait. The bogey’s engaging its star drive, or whatever you call it. He’ll be gone in seconds if his engine holds together. Are we going to pursue?”

  Kalen shook his head. “It’s called a hyperflight drive. And I doubt he’ll be back. Also, we’ll have to clean up all those mines; we can’t leave them for the locals to trip over some day. Besides, our mission is to stand watch over Earth, and we have some damage of our own to take care of before the next pirate comes a-calling.”

  “Roger that.” Then Hal had a thought. “Speaking of the locals, what about the fireworks show? What if some astronomer happened to be scanning this section of the sky? Wouldn’t that give away the whole “is there anyone out there” mystery?”

  Kalen shrugged. “It couldn’t be helped. Let’s hope no one noticed.”

  He enabled the intercom. “Well done, everyone. Stand down from alert and make repairs. Oh, and dispatch a recovery team for those mines.”

  The pirate ship disappeared in a starburst as it triggered its hyperflight drive
. In an instant, the sky was empty.

  “I understand using the mines to slow us down, but why fire at us when we gave him the opportunity to leave unharmed?”

  “Who knows?” Kalen replied. “Maybe he was afraid we’d try to follow him back to his base.” He sighed. “See? This is why we need a trained pilot with a neural interface to fly Adventurer.”

  He shook his head with a grimace. “A ship that size shouldn’t have given us any trouble at all.”

  “Maybe not,” Hal said, “but you did manage to drive it off. That has to count for something.”

  “Yes, we chased it away, but there are far bigger pirate ships around, with crews of over a hundred. This was a minnow. What happens if we meet a shark before you finish your training? There’s no way I could fight off one of those.

  “That’s why we need you. We don’t have anyone else who can do the job.”

  Talk about understatements. If Hal doesn’t work out, we’re in big trouble. We have to find some way to defend this system until our relief arrives. The people down there may not realize what’s going on, but it’s still my job to protect them.

  I have to get Hal up to speed, and fast.

  Once he was certain the raider was gone and not planning to double back, Kalen turned over command to a subordinate and led Hal to a small suite of rooms just off the bridge.

  “I’m sorry to rush you,” Kalen said, “but we can’t afford to wait any longer. The fact that Earth has been visited by two pirates so close together means its location is no longer hidden. We need to hurry up and get you trained.” He smiled. “I think you’ll find it quite an experience.”

  Hal returned the smile. “I guess I’ve been retired long enough. Someone has to teach those pirates the meaning of No Trespassing. They can’t just come in here and steal anything they want.”

  He hitched up his shorts. “They’re about to find out there’s a new sheriff in town.”

  Kalen smiled again. “I’m very glad to hear you say that.” He gestured to take in the expanse of the suite. “These will be your quarters. In battle, you’ll operate the ship from the bridge, but the rest of the time you can do what you need from in here if you wish.”

  Hal scanned the small room. Other than a bed, he saw nothing but bare walls. He raised his eyebrows. Kalen caught the implied question.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll show you later how to access the other rooms and the hidden compartments. There’s some shipboard attire and toiletries in there for you. For now, just lie on the bed and close your eyes. Hal did as instructed. “Now, focus on the itch.”

  Hal was about to point out that nothing itched, and then he became aware of a growing sensation on his arm—his third arm. His eyes shot open, to see Kalen grinning at him. “What…what—?” The words wouldn’t come.

  “What you’re feeling is input from one of the ship’s external sensors, one that monitors the temperature of part of the outer hull. Your brain doesn’t yet know how to interpret that signal, so it’s trying to use familiar frames of reference. The longer you work at it, the better your brain will become at understanding the new input. Within two weeks you should have complete control of the entire ship. Now, let’s try it again. Focus on the sensation. Your mind will gradually begin to make the proper associations with the specific ship functions.”

  Hal nodded his understanding. Immediately, a spot on his fourth arm began to itch, alerting him to a problem with the galley garbage recycler. Then a twinge behind the knee of his fifth leg identified a balky x-ray sensor on Adventurer’s port side. A burning sensation on the third right earlobe on his second head pointed to a stuck valve in the aft crew shower. A pinprick on the seventh finger of his fifth hand indicated a malfunctioning thermistor in the galley on deck nine. Each unique spot on his virtual body represented a particular problem in a specific location of the ship.

  This is just too weird for words! I’d swear I actually have several arms and legs. He opened his eyes and the illusion vanished. “What’s actually happening when I think I’m moving my phantom limbs?”

  “At the moment, nothing. I have the interface set for input-only. Once you’ve mastered the techniques necessary for fine control, you’ll be able to set the yield or intensity of each weapon we have, vary the interior temperature of the ship, set course and engage the hyperflight drive—in short, you’ll be able to do everything needed to operate the ship except cook breakfast.”

  Hal shook his head in wonder. “Incredible. And I can do all that from here in bed?”

  Kalen nodded. “Or anywhere else on the ship. Your wireless link has a range of nearly a kilometer. As I said before, in a battle situation, you’d probably want to be on the bridge to make it easier to coordinate with the other crewmembers; but strictly speaking, you don’t have to be there. Sometimes I think the real reason for having the pilot on the bridge is so the rest of the crew can actually see someone flying the ship.

  Hal grinned. “Makes sense. So now what?”

  “For now, we keep doing what we’re doing. I’ll introduce new input little by little, and you’ll work on identifying the source of the signals and how to respond to them. Eventually you’ll be able to monitor and manage thousands of sensors and controls throughout the ship without conscious thought.”

  Hal whistled. “Sounds like fun. I guess we’d better get to work.”

  He shifted his position with a determined look and let his eyes go out of focus.

  CHAPTER THREE

  The hours turned into days, and the days into a week. After Hal mastered all of the internal sensors, Kalen added the rest of the external ones. He had a spherical view of space around the ship for as far as the eye could see.

  Correction: as far as cameras and high-gain sensors can see.

  The majesty of the view caused him to gasp. Wow. Would you look at that? Stars, moons, planets, asteroids, comets. It’s-it’s magnificent. So this is what the astronauts see when they’re out here. Incredible!

  A split second later, views in other spectra overlaid the visible. He “saw” space in infrared, x-ray, microwave and dozens of other frequency ranges. Rather than being overwhelmed, he found the experience exhilarating.

  This is incredible! I can pick out solar flares on the sun and hotspots on Io. It’s like being Superman with x-ray and heat vision, only I don’t have to worry about kryptonite—merely pirates.

  At first the sheer magnitude of what he experienced threatened to overwhelm him—too many inputs coming too fast. Little by little, Hal learned to interpret the new sensations.

  This is all so bizarre—not only that I can do all this stuff, but that it feels so natural after such a short time. This must be what it’s like to be a spider, with all those legs and compound eyes.

  Stretched out on his bunk in ship-issue tan jumpsuit—the pilot’s color, he was told—Hal mentally toggled the communication relay to the captain’s implant.

  “Kalen. I think I’ve about mastered the intricacies of controlling the lights and temperature and scanning the exterior sensors. I’m sure the rest of the crew could manage that without me. When am I going to start learning the things you brought me aboard to do?”

  “I’ve been monitoring your progress. You’re ready to begin lessons in basic navigation and piloting. When I’m convinced you won’t run us into something big enough to be nasty, we’ll visit the asteroid belt for weapons training.”

  “Yee-ha!” Hal sported a huge grin, even if Kalen couldn’t see it from the bridge. “Now we get to the fun part. How do I begin?”

  “I’ve unlocked the navigational database. You have full access to the star maps, hyperspace routes, and procedures for navigating around celestial bodies. As for piloting, we’ll begin with the maneuvering thrusters, magnetic docking grapples, and the exterior repairbots. After you master those, we’ll move on to the main engines, set at minimal power.”

  “Great. Let’s do it.”

  Hal had the enthusiasm of a puppy, wanting to do everything
, to get into everything, and occasionally getting himself in trouble. Fortunately, at this stage there was nothing he couldn’t also get himself out of. As with the other controls, he quickly mastered the techniques needed to safely and efficiently move the ship about and to remotely pilot the ‘bots. After a few hours, he was ready for the main engines. These took a bit longer to master, as they involved many levels of control: from low-power cruising up through hyperflight. Still, he was an experienced fighter pilot and with the neural interface it took him little time to make sense of it all. By the end of two days, he had done well enough to satisfy even Kalen.

  Or, to be precise, Kalen said, “That’ll have to do.”

  Then it was time to move on to weapons training. As with a jet fighter, it wasn’t simply a matter of pulling a trigger. There were a number of weapons systems, both offensive and defensive, active and passive, and Hal needed to know what each was for, how they all worked and when to employ them. But this was what he lived for.

  God, I love blowing stuff up! I’d forgotten how much I missed it. He grinned happily to himself. To think I once wanted to fly orbital shuttles. This is so much cooler!

  He had just obliterated a small asteroid with the antiproton cannons. As Kalen said, “The APCs pack a wallop against an unprotected target or a small pirate ship, but they can be stopped cold by a powerful-enough energy shield—the kind the bigger ships tend to have.”

  Next he tried out the mass driver on a sixty-six-meter chunk of iron and rock hurtling past Adventurer at several hundred kilometers per hour. The ship zigzagged through the asteroid belt, dodging rocks and simulating evasive maneuvers while Hal lined up his shot. He had to wait for an opening between two other asteroids and….

  Gotcha!

  The mass driver, or MD, had a much greater useful range than the APCs. It was the equivalent of a big gun on an Earthly battleship, firing large loads great distances. It accelerated a 108-kilo slug of depleted uranium to four-tenths the speed of light in a fraction of a second.