Radclyffe - Love's Tender Warriors (The Golden Tiger) Read online

  "You know you can stay with us as long as you like, Drew."

  "I appreciate itboth of you. Im anxious to get settled though. Ill go apartment hunting soon."

  The women quickly unloaded their gear and headed for the brownstone, eager to talk and get reacquainted.

  ~

  Ten miles away, Sean pulled into the long drive that led to her family home in Gladwynea stately wooded enclave of wealthy old families not so affectionately termed the "Main Line". She shared the house that had been her childhood home with her twin sister, Susan.

  "Suse? You home?" she called as she pulled the heavy walnut door closed behind her.

  "In my office," came the reply.

  Sean moved through to the kitchen and pulled a lager from the refrigerator, snapping the top off as she crossed to the dining room. Her sisters office was what had formerly been their fathers study.

  "Hey," she said, leaning against the door and surveying the disaster that was her sisters work space. Computer sheets spewed from the printer onto the floor, portfolios lay open on the long oak work-top, and the face that looked up at her was smudged with ink.

  "Hey, yourself! How was itdid you do okay?"

  Sean thought once again that she would never get used to looking into her own face and finding not a reflection of herself, but nearly her polar opposite. Where she was reserved and introspective, her twin was excitable and extroverted. They were like two halves of the same coinindividual, and yet eternally joined.

  "I got my stripesthree of them."

  "OhWay to go! I knew the old battle-axe would recognize your incredible talent."

  "Suse! Shes not an old battle-axe!" Sean responded in mock exasperation. Her sister, who loathed authority in any form, couldnt understand how her sister could subject herselfwillinglyto what she called "abuse".

  "Anyone who makes grown women do push-ups because they forget to say Yes Maam is a sadist," she said half seriously. She held up a hand to stop her sisters protests. They had had this conversation before. "I know, I knowyou love it, you love her, you love Tae Kwon Do. Youre seeking your higher powerheaven forbid I should complain about anyones higher power. Still, youre a masochist. You proved that by marrying Michael Montrose."

  Susan had never liked Seans husband and had protested vehemently when she had married him at twenty. Not only had it meant that Sean moved to another city, she also gave up dancing, deciding to study psychology. The sisters had remained close, and after Sean left her ten-year marriage, Susan had welcomed her home.

  "A momentary lapse in judgmentand I am not a masochist!"

  "Oh, I forgotpsychologists cant have neurosesyoure all normal and healthy."

  "You should know," Sean riposted. "Youre married to one."

  "Ellen and I are not married. Werewere seriously involved."

  "Is that what you call a six-year monogamous relationship? Seriously, when are you going to give in and live with her?"

  For the first time Susan looked uncomfortable. "I dont know. She keeps asking, but I just cant do it. Look at Mom and Dadand you, for crying out loud! Marriage equals death for a relationship. At least we still have good sex."

  Sean bit back a retort. Ellen Tyler and she shared an office in the renovated carriage house that adjoined the main house. They were friends, and she knew how much Ellen longed to cement her relationship with Susan by living together. Sean also knew how much Susans steadfast refusal hurt Ellen. Still, Susan was her sister, they shared the same history, and she understood Susans reluctance. She even shared it herself. After her divorce five years previously, she had had no interest in relationships, casual or otherwise. She didnt miss the sexshe hadnt found it all that earth shattering to begin with. She had her friends, her sister, her work to occupy her. If occasionally she longed for someone to share her quiet moments with, it was a feeling she could live with. Life was goodshe was content.

  "Maybe you and Ellen should see a therapist together?"

  Susan shot her a horrified look. "Oh please! Isnt AA enough? I cant face anymore processing in my life."

  Sean laughed. "OkayI give. What are you doing, anyhow?"

  "Tokyo is going crazy, and Im trying to keep all my boats afloat. Ill be done in a whileI just need to make sure all my clients millions dont turn into confetti. Want to watch a movie in about an hour?"

  "Sounds great! Im exhausted. Let me showeryou pick the film."

  When they met later in the library, Susan was prepared with her choice of film. "Youll like this oneits about a lesbian psychiatrist and a bunch of women on this writers retreat."

  Sean handed her a bowl of popcorn and curled up beside her on the large sofa.

  "Whats it called?"

  " Claire of the Moon ."

  "Okayroll it."

  Sean munched popcorn and let her body dissolve into the soft cushions as the story of two women learning to love each other unfolded. She liked the way the two main characters lookedthey were attractive in a light butch/femme way. The psychiatrist was pretty uptighttype casting?but then, she had been hurt by love. The other one was straight except all that meant was that she slept with men. Emotionally they didnt touch her. The women danced together and apart throughout much of the moviedrawn closer by need and desirepulled apart by fear.

  At one point, Susan exclaimed, "If they dont get together soon, Ill die. I cant stand this foreplay!"

  Sean laughed, "Dont you know thats most of the fun? Once the tension breaks, its only sex."

  Susan looked at her aghast. "Excuse me! Only sex? No wonder you can stand being celibate!"

  Sean shrugged. "Its not so bad."

  Susan clicked the remote to pause. "Dont you miss it?" she asked, uncharacteristically serious.

  Sean pondered the question. "What I miss is something I never had. I dont miss the actit wasnt all that much fun. And what I wanted from it was closenessintimacyand that just wasnt there."

  "Maybe it was Michael?"

  "I dont think so, Suse. He isnt the only man I ever slept with, and some of them were damn nice guys. It just didnt happen to me."

  "Did you ever think about women?"

  Sean tossed a pillow at her. "With you and these movies around how could I not? These two are beautiful to look at , and beautiful together. So are you and Ellen. You and I share the same genesI know that. Im just not ready for anyone, Suse. Maybe I never will be."

  Susan nodded and clicked the movie back on. She didnt believe her sister for a minute.

  CHAPTER THREE

  "Line up for one-steps," Master Drew Clark called. "Gailyoure with Sean. The rest of you pair off by rank."

  Sean stood facing Gail Driscoll, the blue belt who ranked second in the class. She was a handsome young woman, fit and strong from rugby, which was her passion after Tae Kwon Do. Her shoulder-length hair was slightly shaggy, which lent her a roguish air. She had a natural talent for the art and would have been further along if she had applied herself a little more seriously. As it was, she was young and full of spirit, and all the world seemed to beckon her with some new adventure. Sean liked her in an older sister kind of way and occasionally envied her nave optimism.

  "I want ten one-steps, one after the other. I expect to see advanced techniques from the senior students. Face each other. Bow. Begin!" Drew called. She moved up and down the room, correcting stances on the newer students, offering advice to the intermediates. When she reached Sean and Gail, she stood quietly to one side, her arms folded, her legs spread. Gail, she noted, was using fairly routine techniques that they practiced many times, performing adequately but without much initiative. Sean, as she had come to expect over the month she had been teaching, was improvising new combinations that were her own originals. Her technique was crisp and controlled. Drew respected Seans quiet determination and tireless effort. She brought an air of calm dedication to each class and set a good example for younger students.

  "Let me see something that befits your rank, Gail. Sean, put out a high section punch to the face."


  "Yes, maam," they replied in unison.

  Sean punched forward with her right hand, holding the position so Gail could institute a defensive combination. Gail countered swiftly with a high forearm block and turned to finish with a high hooking kick. She lost her balance slightly as she kicked and caught Sean full in the face with the heel of her foot. Sean dropped instantly, blood streaming from her nose.

  "Oh god," Gail cried. "Oh JeezIm sorry."

  Drew knelt beside Sean whose eyes were closed. For a brief moment Drew was in a darkened alley with another woman whose face was covered in blood. Fear and anguish threatened to choke her, and she whispered, "Dara?" in a strangled voice.

  Sean moaned and opened her eyes. Through a haze she could see Drews face, panic-stricken, staring down at her. The blue eyes were glazed, uncharacteristically vulnerable, and a sea of pain washed through them. The hand that reached for her was trembling.

  "Oh god, no" Drew moaned.

  Sean heard the agony in Drews deep voice and struggled for speech.

  "Its all right, Master Clark. Im okayexcept I think my nose is broken."

  Drew shook her head, confused, and then realized where she was and what had happened.

  "Lie still, Sean. Dont try to move yet. Gail, soak a towel with cold water and bring it to me." She glanced up at the young woman beside her, who stood terrified in place.

  "Go on, Gail. Do it!" Drew snapped. As Gail rushed off, Drew turned once again to Sean. She slipped her fingers into the palm of Seans left hand.

  "Squeeze my fingers, Seanharder. Goodnow the other hand. Good. Now move both legs." She nodded in relief as Sean complied. "Now, tell me who you are."

  "Sean Grey. Im at the Golden Tiger Kwan, and Gail just decked me."

  Drew laughed a little shakily. "Very good. Nowcan you see me clearly?"

  "Yes," Sean replied, not adding that Drew looked as pale as she felt.

  Drew pressed the iced towel against Seans face and slid one arm under her shoulders.

  "Sit up very slowlylean against me."

  "Ill get blood on you," Sean protested.

  Drew laughed and pressed Sean closer. "No matteritll wash. Gaildismiss the classIm driving Sean to the hospital."

  Despite Seans vigorous protests, Drew had insisted, and they soon joined the waiting crowd in the university hospital emergency room.

  "How does it feel?" Drew asked.

  "Awfulhow does it look?"

  Drew pulled the towel away a few inches and scrutinized Seans face carefully. "Its swollen, but straight. With any luck, the fractures arent displaced and wont require surgery."

  Sean sighed. "I hope notI dont want to miss class."

  Drew shook her head, marveling at Seans composure. She had seen soldiers complain more over sore muscles than this woman did.

  "Master Cho is going to flay me alive for letting this happen," Drew said dryly.

  Sean started in surprise. "Why? Its not your fault!"

  "Oh, but it is. Everything that happens in that room is my responsibility. I pushed Gail too hardshe tried something she wasnt ready for."

  Sean contemplated the words in silence. She knew very well the code of ethics practiced by her teachers and how seriously they took their responsibilities. This, however, seemed extreme.

  "With all due respect, maam, accidents happen. Ive hit a few people harder than I had intended a few times. You included."

  Drew nodded, not fully accepting the rationalization, but appreciating Seans efforts to assuage her guilt.

  "Thanks. Theyre calling youIll wait."

  "No, thats okayI can call my sister."

  "Ill wait, Sean," Drew said with finality.

  ~

  Drew pulled around the circular drive to the front of the house and parked.

  Sean hesitated, and then asked tentatively, "Will you come in for a moment? Have something to drink?"

  Drew started to refuse and then realized she wanted to be certain that Sean would be all right. The doctors had said her nose was cracked but would heal without surgery. Still, she had sustained a significant blow to her head.

  "For a minute." She cut the engine and hurried around the front of her black sports car, reaching the door as Sean pushed it open.

  "Can you make it?" she asked, slipping her hand under Seans elbow.

  "Yes," Sean laughed, "Thanks."

  As Sean pushed the front door open, an anxious voice called, "Is that you, Sean?" Susan appeared around the corner and stopped in her tracks.

  "Oh my god! What happened? Ellen! Ellen, come here! Sean is hurt!" She rushed up to Sean, clutching her hands. "What happened? Oh god! Sean are you all right?"

  Sean pulled Susan into her arms and hugged her tightly. "Im absolutely fine, Suse honey, relax. I just got hit in the nose."

  "Looks like you got hit in the nose with an ax," the rangy red-head who approached behind Susan commented. "Youre a mess. How about a beer?"

  Sean laughed at Ellens usual aplomb and nodded. "First let me introduce my teacher," she said, turning to Drew who still stood in the doorway. "My sister, Susanher lover, EllenMaster Drew Clark."

  "Just Drew," Drew said as she shook each womans hand in turn. She noticed that Susan was staring at her with anger.

  "Are you the one who did this to her?" Susan demanded.

  "Well, it was my fault"

  "Oh, stop" Sean said in exasperation, "both of you. My face got in the way of someones foot and thats all there is to it!"

  Drew was surprised by Seans commanding tone and then realized that there were many sides to Sean she wouldnt see in the dojang . The student-teacher relationship was very one-sided, and she generally made it a point not to socialize with students outside of class. This night had been exceptional in more ways than one.

  "Perhaps I better leaveif youre sure youre all right."

  "Nonsense," Ellen interjected, "stay for a while so Susan will be convinced youre not a maniac. Will you have a beer or something?"

  Drew smiled, enjoying Ellens dry humor. It seemed a perfect foil for her lovers excitability.

  "Thanks. A beer will be fine."

  "Let me get out of this," Sean said, indicating her bloodied uniform. "Ill meet you on the terrace."

  It was almost midnight, and the hot, heavy air of late August had just begun to cool. The women stretched out on chaise lounges with their drinks. Sean crossed the patio in blue jeans and a sleeveless tee shirt and handed Drew a denim workshirt.

  "You might need this. Your tee shirt is still soaked.

  Drew was wearing her cotton uniform pants and the sweat-stained shirt she had worked out in. It was still damp and none too comfortable.

  "Maybe Ill change"

  "The bathroom is inside and to your right."

  Ellen turned to Sean when Drew stepped inside and commented, "That is one gorgeous woman. Shes got eyes to drown in and a body that doesnt quit. How come you never mentioned her?"

  Sean laughed a little self-consciously. "Shes my teacher, Ellen. Shes only been here a few weeks. I hardly know her."

  "Is she gay?" Ellen asked.

  Ellen, as Sean very well knew, was relentless about details. She loved therapy because she loved the details of peoples lives, and it was intense interest in all things personal that made her such a good therapist. For in addition to curiosity, she had boundless compassion.

  "I dont know. Does it matter?"

  "Ah, nobut such a loss if she isnt."

  "Pig!" Susan exclaimed good-naturedly, slapping Ellen on the arm.

  Drew joined them at that moment, the shirt tucked into her uniform pants. It was a little small for her and accentuated the breadth of her well-developed shoulders. She had rolled the sleeves up to reveal muscled forearms. She sank to the chair and reached for her beer.

  "What a night," she sighed, losing herself in the stars overhead.

  The four women sat in silence for a few moments, enjoying the breeze.

  "How do you feel?" Drew asked softly to S
ean.

  "Not bada little headache."

  "Im sorry"

  "I know. Lets forget it, shall we? Ill be fine."

  Drew nodded in agreement.

  "Where are you from, Drew?" Ellen asked.

  Drew started at the question. It had been a long time since she had been in a new social situation. She had immersed herself in work in Virginia and rarely spoke to anyone outside of her professional circle.

  "Not far from here, actually. I grew up in Rosemont. But Ive been gone a long time," she finished awkwardly.

  "What do you do?" Ellen continued unperturbed.

  "I teach martial arts. For many years I taught army recruits hand-to-hand combat as well as more formal styles of martial arts, like Tae Kwon Do and Aikido."

  "I didnt know you knew Aikido," Sean exclaimed. "Do you still train?"

  "Yes, I do. In fact, the school is quite near here. Fortunately, my old teacher is still active, and Ive been able to continue with her. You should come watch a class sometime," she added impulsively. As soon as the words were spoken, Drew wished she could have them back. She had no idea why she had said them, and she wasnt sure it was a good idea to appear too friendly with one of her students.

  "Id really like that," Sean answered. "I love to see different styles, and Ive always found Aikido beautiful. Will you tell me when it would be a good time to come?"

  "Ill check with my sensei and let you know," Drew responded, hoping her reluctance wasnt obvious.

  "Oh, terrific, Sean," Susan exclaimed. "Now you can find some other way to get yourself hurt!"

  "Hey, SuseIm okay. Really. And Im not about to begin another art formnot for a long time. Maybe never. Ive got too much still to learn." Sean ruffled her sisters hair. "I promise I wont let anything happen to me, okay?"

  Drew was moved by the obvious affection between the two sisters. She thought regretfully that it took more than a promise to keep someone safe. She felt the despair she lived with every day begin to surface, and she struggled to bury it once again. For some reason, old torments had returned to plague her since her return to Philadelphiapain she thought she had successfully banished.