Amelia Fang and the Memory Thief Read online

  “This is amazing,” said Grimaldi. “Your memory is coming back all on its own!”

  “I’m sorry for making you grumpy,” said Amelia sheepishly.

  “WHADDYA MEAN?” Florence said.

  “I got annoyed about not selling cookies, and about you and Grimaldi not wanting to bake…,” said Amelia, feeling the memories come pouring back and feeling terribly guilty about it all. “I’m sorry. I’d wanted to go to Pumpkin Paradise Park so much I forgot to make time for playing with my friends. Are we still friends?”

  “OF COURSE WE ARE, SILLY BILLY! ANYWAYS, I COULD NEVER STAY GRUMPY WITH YOU, AMELIA. YOU’RE ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS—AND I WAS QUITE ANNOYING, TO BE FAIR!” Florence chuckled and put an arm around Amelia’s shoulders. “I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU LOVE PUMPKINS. AND I’D FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT MY GRUMPS ANYWAYS…QUITE LITERALLY.”

  Amelia, Florence and Grimaldi giggled.

  “A CLASSIC CASE OF THE PUMPKINS AND THE GRUMPKINS, I SAY!”

  Amelia snorted and burst out laughing. Life would be so dull without Florence around.

  A small vampire with fairy wings marched up to the group with his hands on his hips. “Room for your future king in there?” Then he nose-dived into the huge hug-fest, sending a puff of glitter flying into the air.

  “BLARG!” coughed Amelia. “Hey, Tangine, what’s with all the glitter?”

  “There you go,” said Tangine, now draped over Florence’s shoulder. “She remembers me. Surely that’s all that matters?” Florence grabbed Tangine’s head and pushed him off.

  “YOU DON’T NEED TO REMEMBER HIM. TOOK HIM LONG ENOUGH TO REMEMBER HIS OWN NAME,” said Florence to Amelia. “HE’S A BIT OF A TURNIP ANYWAYS.” Then, in one arm, Florence scooped up Tangine, who blushed as red as a Beetroot Belch-Shake. “THE BEST TURNIP AROUND, THOUGH.”

  Amelia soon found herself being hugged by more and more creatures—King Vladimir, Queen Fairyweather, Sherryweather, Adonis the angel-kitten (who took it upon himself to dust everyone down with his collar duster), McSparkle the leprechaun, their teacher, Miss Inspine…and even Frankie Steinburg.

  Amelia jumped with shock as she suddenly remembered the rivalry between her and Frankie.

  Frankie stepped back and shrugged. “Don’t get used to it. I’m still better than you in class,” she said, folding her arms. “You should probably remember that.”

  Amelia looked at Florence and Grimaldi, who were holding in chuckles.

  After many more hugs, a few eyeballs popping out and a bit of an issue with some goblin slime, Amelia came to realize that no matter what happened, her family and friends would never love her any less. Every high and every low only made their bonds stronger, and Amelia could feel that from the memories that were returning to her.

  “Let me go!” a voice said, snapping Amelia out of her thoughts. She knew she remembered it from somewhere—and that she didn’t like it one bit.

  The crowd quietened and parted to reveal a handcuffed figure with thick glasses and a dramatic cloak. He looked familiar, but Amelia wasn’t sure why. Two unicorn guards were standing on either side of him.

  It was Emilbus.

  “Did we give you permission to speak?” said one of the unicorn guards.

  “Technically, we didn’t tell him he couldn’t speak, Ricky,” said the unicorn guard wearing glasses.

  “Well, Graham, he shouldn’t be speaking—he’s a criminal!” said the unicorn guard called Ricky.

  “YOU MAY NOT REMEMBER,” said Florence to Amelia. “BUT HE’S THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL OF THIS. HE TRIED TO KEEP THE CREATURES OF THE DARK AND LIGHT AWAY FROM EACH OTHER. BUT YOU STOPPED HIM!” Then she added, “KINDA SAD HIS REAL NAME DOESN’T SOUND LIKE ‘SLIME,’ THOUGH.”

  “I don’t get it,” spat Emilbus. “You freed everyone’s memories, which means you were SUPPOSED to lose your memory for good. How are you remembering again?”

  Tangine marched over to Mr. Sublime, holding up the Fairy Forest Encyclopedia. “It says right here: ‘The only possible remedy to restore the picker’s memories is love. But the bond of love must be stronger than the loss of the memories.’ So the effects are not completely irreversible. Seems you’re not quite the Fairy Forest expert after all, Mr. NOT-SO-SUBLIME!”

  Emilbus went purple with anger and made a strange growling noise. “I KNEW that! But nobody loves anyone THAT much! It’s an impossible cure!” he spat.

  “YOU WOULDN’T UNDERSTAND ’CAUSE YOU’RE TOO FULL OF HATE,” Florence said. Then she blew a very wet yeti-style raspberry in his face.

  “You could still be a wonderful person like me, you know,” said Tangine puffing his chest out. “Us half-vamp, half-fairy fellows are a great example of how the Creatures of the Dark AND Light can live side by side.”

  “The two kingdoms will NEVER be friends again, as long as I have anything to do with it!” Emilbus yelled at him.

  “Maybe some time to think in the candy chambers will help,” suggested Tangine. “Mostly because you forget how fabulous I am. An unforgivable offense.”

  “TAKE HIM AWAY!” Florence bellowed. Then she turned to Amelia and giggled. “I’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO SAY THAT!”

  “Sure thing!” Ricky said.

  “Come on, you ol’ crook!” said Graham, and the two unicorn guards dragged Emilbus away.

  Feeling relieved that the last of her unhappy memories were now dealt with, Amelia had a sudden thought.

  “Wait! Was it my birthnight?” She widened her eyes. “I seem to remember…nobody turned up to my party!”

  Countess Frivoleeta gasped, and her left eyeball popped out. “Slivering serpents! It was!” she shrilled. “We’d ALL forgotten! Only because of those dreadful cookies, of course.”

  Amelia giggled. “It’s okay, Mom. I understand.”

  “Well,” said Count Drake, standing up and addressing the crowd, waving his crossword pen as he spoke. “We have so much to celebrate now, why don’t we have the ultimate birthnight party in the Pumpkin Patch right away!”

  Later that night, Amelia, Florence, Grimaldi and Tangine gathered in the Pumpkin Patch, munching on Iced Intestine Pops and Crusty Claws. Amelia was pleased that her sore fang was feeling much better.

  “Booger, anyone?” said Tangine, walking over with a plateful.

  “CAREFUL WITH THOSE,” said Florence. “THEY MADE YOU SICK LAST TIME.”

  “They’re just so good and juicy!” said Tangine, licking his lips. “Anyway, at least I didn’t eat memory-erasing cookies!”

  “SHAME,” said Florence. “IF YOU’D HAD A COOKIE, YOU’D FORGET ALL ABOUT THE MASSIVE WET-WORM I’M ABOUT TO GIVE YOU!” And with that, she slobbered all over her thumb and stuck it in Tangine’s ear.

  “EEEEEWWWWWW!” Tangine cried.

  Squashy came bouncing along, wearing six bow ties. He pa-doinged into Amelia’s arms and squeaked twice. SQUEAK-SQUEAK!

  PA-DUD-DUD-DUD-DUD-DUD.

  Amelia, Florence and Grimaldi gasped as a HUGE Pumpy rolled into the Pumpkin Patch, squishing a toad on the way. He was no longer the muscly, well-defined pumpkin they had once known.

  “Maybe you are feeding him too much, Tangine,” said Grimaldi.

  “I’m not!” said Tangine defensively. “I found out he ate the WHOLE palace’s food supply when he and Squashy went missing.”

  King Vladimir waltzed over. “Amelia!” he said, beaming. “I have something for you. It’s a gesture of thanks from, well, everyone!” And he handed her a golden envelope with a little pumpkin symbol on it.

  Amelia stroked the silky envelope. The king smiled as her friends gathered around. “Go on, open it!”

  Amelia carefully unsealed it, revealing four shiny orange pieces of paper inside.

  “Tickets to Pumpkin Paradise Park!”

  Amelia couldn’t believe her eyes.

  “Tangine told me how much you were hoping t
o go,” the king explained. “So there’s a ticket for you and each of your friends to spend a whole week there!”

  “Th-thank you!” stuttered Amelia, feeling almost speechless. “But I don’t really remember doing that much….”

  The king chuckled. “Well, hopefully that will all come back to you, Amelia Fang. But know for now that you and my son are the reason we’re all standing here tonight. The reason two kingdoms can celebrate side by side.”

  “We totally are!” Tangine gave Amelia a friendly nudge.

  Then Florence shouted, “GROUP HUG!” and everyone bundled into a huge furry, slimy, glittery heap.

  * * *

  After much celebrating and eating, Amelia and Squashy headed back to the Fang Mansion with her parents.

  From her bedroom window, Amelia could see the whole of Nocturnia. The moon was full and bright, and post-bats flew across the night sky. She could hear Wooo drifting along the corridors, her dad humming while on the toilet (probably working on a crossword too) and her mom calling the count, wondering where he was.

  Squashy bounced into Amelia’s lap as she sat down for a while to enjoy the view. Even though her memory was still a little fuzzy, almost everything had come back to her, thanks to the love of her family and friends.

  Amelia stroked Squashy’s belly, which was full to the brim and gurgling with Gasping Gooseberries.

  There was a light knock on Amelia’s bedroom door, and the countess’s beehive hair made an appearance. “Dare I look in here?” she said.

  “Gaaah, I’ve not had a chance to clean up yet!” Amelia panicked, leaping up and almost stepping into a puddle of goblin-slime superglue.

  Countess Frivoleeta laughed and stepped into the bedroom. “Darkling, I’m joking. I know I don’t very often, but this is one of those rare occasions. It was a terrifically terrifying joke, don’t you think?”

  Amelia breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Yes, terrifying,” she said, raising her eyebrows.

  “I wanted to give you something,” said her mother. “Close your eyes….”

  Amelia heard some rummaging around and then felt something slide over her head and drop down by her chest.

  “Open…,” said her mother softly.

  When Amelia opened her eyes and looked down, she saw a little pumpkin necklace shimmering in the moonlight. Amelia gasped.

  “It’s wonderful!” she cried, throwing her arms around her mother’s waist. “Thank you, Mom!”

  “Well, you’ll need something to remember me by while you’re off traveling to all the different pumpkin patches as a world-class Pumpkinologist,” the countess said with a smile.

  Amelia couldn’t quite believe what she was hearing. “You…you don’t mind that I want to be a Pumpkinologist? I thought—” she began. But her mother placed a finger on Amelia’s lips.

  “Amelia Fang. You follow those pumpkin-shaped dreams of yours and do what makes YOU happy…” Then she added, “As soon as you complete your organ exams.”

  Amelia and her mom burst out laughing. “Sure, Mom.”

  Amelia gave the countess one last squeeze before reluctantly deciding she really should clean up. And then she realized something a little bit awkward.

  “Um, Mom…”

  “Yes, my horrid little leech?”

  “I think I got goblin-slime superglue on me again,” said Amelia. “I’m pretty sure we’re stuck together….”

  The countess tried to move, but Amelia was right. The two of them were firmly stuck to each other.

  “Well,” said the countess, “I guess we’ll just have to hug forever!”

  “Doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” said Amelia, breathing in her mom’s wonderfully rotten perfume. Then she looked up and grinned. “Does that mean I don’t have to clean my room now?”

  When she’s not trying to take over the world or fighting sock-stealing monsters, Laura Ellen Anderson is a professional children’s book author and illustrator, with an increasing addiction to coffee. She spends every waking hour creating and drawing, and would quite like to live on the moon when humans finally make it possible. Laura is the creator of Evil Emperor Penguin and the illustrator of Witch Wars, as well as many other children’s books. Amelia Fang is her first series as an author-illustrator.

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