Special Forces_Operation Alpha_Undeniable Read online

  “What am I supposed to tell Mom?” She already was mad at me for dumping Kevin and moving in with Ryan so quickly. She had never really liked Ryan, so it was a double dose of disappointment in her eyes.

  “Tell her I’m sick or something. I have to go, baby. How ’bout you come by the barn after dinner and hang out with me and the guys? I’ll be back over there by then.”

  “You owe me.”

  He kissed me one last time before melting my heart. “Until my eyes see you again, I will hold you endlessly in my heart. Behind my eyelids, nothing exists except for you. I’ll see you later, baby.”

  Dinner with my parents and brother was a special form of torture. No one knew what to say so we all stayed quiet through a painful meal, just like we had for the last eight Sunday evenings in a row. I hated that I felt the need to continue the awful family tradition, but I just didn’t want to continue to disappoint my mom. If she wanted to see me for supper one night a week, I could deal with the awkwardness for a while.

  It was better than Ryan’s situation—his parents refused to answer the phone or even open the door. We had tried a few times, but when he’d enlisted, his folks had told him that as far as they were concerned, both of their sons were dead, and they were steadfast in their resolve to stick to that sentiment. It broke my heart for Ryan, but we were about to start our own lives and family so we had to just accept their decision and focus on the future.

  When I got to the barn, I walked in the side door and scanned the room for Ryan. He was standing the in back with a mug clutched in his hand, stroking his beard while talking to Buck.

  Right when I caught his eye, he waved and trotted over to me. “Hey, babe.” He kissed my cheek, leading me over to the bar. “Need a drink after that dinner?”

  I took a seat on a barstool as Buck joined us. “Just water, babe. It’s been a long night.”

  “Hey little lady.” Buck wrapped his arm around me to give me a hug. “You’re glowing.” His eyes narrowed as I tried to stifle the smile that was taking over my face. I couldn’t wait to get Ryan alone, but I didn’t want anyone figuring out why until I got to tell him first.

  “Just glad to be out of another terrible family dinner.”

  Ryan handed me a bottle of water while filling up his mug with Old Crow and 7-Up. “Was it really that bad?” He leaned across the narrow bar to kiss me.

  I shrugged as our lips parted. “She’s still not talking to me.”

  Buck cracked open a beer. “Family shit is the worst. We all know it far too well around here.”

  I grabbed Ryan’s hand. “Can we talk out back for a second?” I just couldn’t wait any longer to tell him the news I’d figured out right when he left that afternoon.

  “Yeah, of course. Is everything all right?” Ryan grabbed my hand as we made our way to the back. His thumb drew circles in the palm of my hand as he smiled down at me.

  “Uh huh, I just have some news that I want to tell you privately, that’s all.”

  As soon as we were a few steps out of the back door, a few men on bikes started riding down the fence line in the grass. They had bandanas covering their noses and mouths.

  “Fuck! Cass!” Ryan yelled, scooping me up into his arms.

  I had no idea what was going on. The sounds of guns firing, guys yelling, and motorcycles revving erupted as Ryan ran with me back into the barn. We fell onto a couch with him on top of me, covering my entire body with his. As I gasped for air, I realized we were both covered in blood. When the gunfire finally stopped, Ryan pulled me to my feet.

  Buck rushed over. “Are either of you hit?” he asked us.

  Ryan ignored him, running his hands up and down my body, checking to see if I had been injured. I knew the blood had come from one of us and that I was fine.

  I started trembling as I screamed in Ryan’s face, “Answer him!”

  “Right shoulder, flesh wound. Get me the kit, I can patch it up myself,” he finally told Buck as a few of the guys ran back in with their guns drawn.

  Ryan continued to check my body as I collapsed into Buck’s arms, sobbing. “I’m not hurt. I’m fine. Buck, just make sure Ryan is okay.” I was a blubbering mess.

  “I’m calling Fletch.” Ryan pulled his phone out of his pocket to call my best friend’s husband, and I couldn’t protest. I knew if the club was being hit, I was in danger and couldn’t go home. It was the first time anything like that had happened. Before that moment, Ryan had just been a guy on a motorcycle who had other friends who liked to ride motorcycles too and occasionally shot guns. Now he was an outlaw, I was his old lady, and we were in danger.

  Chapter 12

  Ryan

  After cleaning up my shoulder, stitching it up myself, and helping a few of the guys tend to their wounds, I sat with Buck in the back room.

  “What the fuck was that?” I snarled, taking another sip from my mug.

  He shook his head. “Fuck if I know. Sinners don’t wear bandanas.”

  “We eliminated the threat, so who the fuck is left the try to retaliate—and after all this time?” I slammed my mug down on the table.

  “There’s nothing we can do tonight. Everyone needs to get some sleep, and we will make calls in the morning. Go home and check on Cass. Tell the guys to bring their families to safe houses. We’re going into lockdown until we can figure out what the hell is going on.” Buck got up from his seat and started to walk out the door.

  “Just when I thought things were a little too boring around here.” I hammered down the last of my drink and dug the Bronco keys out of my pocket.

  Buck blocked the doorway. “Leave that truck here. We don’t know who the target is and you brought that damn thing on the run with you. Take mine.”

  I didn’t protest; he was right. “Thanks.”

  “Take care of your girl—she’s a special one.” He gave me a quick wink before I walked out to his truck.

  I knocked on Emily and Fletch’s front door, and Cass opened it with tearstained cheeks. I hated making her cry, and I hated that she had just gone through such a terrible experience.

  “Baby,” I whispered as I pulled her into my arms. “I am so sorry.”

  She cried in my arms in the doorway while Fletch and Emily watched from inside. I waved to them. “Thank you.”

  Fletch put his hand in the air, waving me off dismissively. “We’re just glad you’re all okay.”

  I followed Cass into their living room.

  “Why don’t you go lie down for a bit? Come on.” Emily pulled her best friend into the back bedroom as I sat with Fletch on the couch.

  He sneered at me and didn’t waste any time with chitchat. “What the fuck happened?”

  I ran my hand over my face. “Fuck if I know, man. It’s never happened before. No one has ever had the balls to hit us like that.”

  “You have to pick one or the other. You can’t have your cake and eat it too.”

  Right as I was about to defend my lifestyle to Fletch, Annie ran out of her room and jumped into my lap. “Uncle Ryan, I thought I heard your voice.”

  I kissed the top of her head, pulling her into a better position. “Shouldn’t you be in bed? It is a school night.”

  The little girl stroked my beard as her doe eyes looked up at me. “I had to come say goodnight to you when I heard your voice.”

  Her tiny arms wrapped around my neck briefly before Fletch scooped her up. “Come on, Annie. Uncle Ryan and I have a lot to talk about, and it is way past your bedtime.”

  It only took Fletch a minute to put his little girl back down. “Do you want that?” He pointed back to his daughter’s room.

  I nodded. “Yeah, with Cass. I want to have a family pretty badly.”

  “I shouldn’t be the one to tell you this, but Cass is pregnant. She found out today, so it’s now or never. You have to choose what life you actually want to have. Cass isn’t going to stick around through this shit—I won’t let her. Don’t get me wrong, Ryan, I really like you, and I know how
much Cass loves you, but this shit just can’t fly. You’re a damn Marine. You know how to be a better man than to let your woman be caught in crossfire.”

  “She’s pregnant?” I started muttering the question over and over as the words sank deeper and deeper into my mind. A switch flipped—I was out. I was going to be the man Cass deserved. She needed a man she didn’t have to worry about having home at the end of the day. She was not going to have to worry about there being a time she’d be a young widow. She was never going to have to live another day without me.

  I stood, marched into the bedroom, and grabbed Cassidy. I held her in my arms as I sank to the floor with her sitting in my lap. I kissed her hands, her cheeks, and her forehead.

  “Ryan?” she muttered while sniffling.

  “Don’t be mad, but I know about the baby.”

  She pulled back quickly, her eyes wide. “I wanted to tell you myself.”

  “I don’t care how I found out. We’re going to have a baby. I’m leaving the club. First thing in the morning, I’m turning in my patches.”

  Her arms flew around my neck. “Oh, Ryan! Thank you.”

  “Please, marry me. You know you’ve completely infiltrated my heart, and I want nothing else in this life other than you. I missed out on ten years with you, and I don’t want to waste another second. Let’s start a new life together and raise our baby. Let’s be happy and be a boring married couple—no military, no outlaws, no guns, no worry.”

  “Ryan, I will absolutely marry you. I love you so much.”

  “I love you too, Cass. I always will.”

  Chapter 13

  Ryan

  “Buck, I have to talk to you.” I hated what I was about to do, but I needed to just get it over and done with. I knew it was right, knew I was going to be happier for it, but part of me was dying inside.

  We sat alone in the back room of the barn. “What’s up, kid?”

  “Cass is pregnant. I’m going to be a father.” I pulled my cut off, took out my knife from its sheath in my boot, and started to cut the stitching that held my vice president patch onto the worn-out cut. Buck sat in silence while watching me. One by one, I cut each of the patches off of the leather until the skull and bones were all that was left. Nothing that said Killeen or contained the Unacceptables’ name could be found.

  Buck put his hand on mine as it shook a little. There was a knowing in his eyes. “We have to call a vote, but if you want to patch out, I understand and support your decision. You have to do what is right for you and your family.”

  “She said she’ll marry me. I have to do this for her. She deserves for me to choose her and put her first.” I gripped the patches in my hand as I stared down at my clenched fist.

  “You’re making the right decision. Cass is worth it, and we will always be your family. You’ll be under our protection for the rest of your life. You will always have a home here.”

  Buck made a few calls and within a few minutes, every chair at the table was filled.

  I stood to address my brethren. “This decision was not made lightly, but I must ask you all to vote me out. I need to leave the Unacceptables. I can no longer effectively do my duty to the full extent that this organization deserves. Buck will also be talking to you all about who will be taking my place.”

  I set my patches down in the middle of the table, in the center of the skull and bones that had given me back my life. As I walked out of that room after hugging each one of my brothers, I knew I was making the right choice for me. Yes, it was for the best for everyone involved, but for the first time in my life, what was best for me and the choices I was making were also right for everyone I truly cared about. I was moving forward. The Marines and the Unacceptables had been stepping stones to make me the man I had always wanted to be for Cassidy. Without them, I never would have deserved her. In that moment, I truly understood that, and I was grateful for the journey and for my past. I was excited to see what the future had in store for me and my family.

  Epilogue

  A little over a year later

  Ryan

  “Morning, babe.” I kissed Cass as her sleepy eyes fluttered awake while rocking our baby in my arms.

  “Mmmmmm!” She groaned stretching and rubbing her eyes. “What time is it?”

  I handed baby Mikey over to her. “Time for this little guy’s breakfast.”

  Helping her sit up, I shoved a pillow behind her back and draped her favorite blanket over her chest. “It’s not fair that you don’t have milk glands.”

  It was the same complaint every morning, but she insisted on breastfeeding for as long as she could.

  “Babe, I would do it for you if I could.” Tank trotted over to me with his leash in his mouth, shoving my hand and whimpering a bit. “Hold on, bud. We’re going in a minute.”

  She rolled her eye. “Those words are empty since it will never happen.”

  I kissed the top of her head. “I’m gonna be late. I need to walk this guy and then get to the office.”

  “Remind me to be mad at you later for being so busy with work.” She shot me a tight lipped smile and a little wink.

  “Hey, the security company was a great idea, babe. It’s not my fault that I ran with your idea and we’re already going national.” I kissed her forehead. “Don’t forget, we have date night tonight.”

  I pulled a garment box out of the closet and tossed a wink over my shoulder before I clipped Tank’s leash on.

  Trotting down the front steps being pulled along by my dog, I called Emily.

  “Hey there,” her sweet singsong voice came through the line right away.

  “Are we all set for tonight?” I asked, turning back to look at the house to make sure Cass wasn’t within ear shot. I knew she wasn’t but I needed everything to be perfect.

  “Stop your worrying. Fletch and I have everything worked out. Just meet Nate in the field like planned.”

  “Thanks for this, Emily. I know it’s hard for you to keep a secret from Cassidy.”

  “It’ll all be worth it in the end. See you tonight.”

  Cassidy

  “Ryan’s going to be off of work any time now.” I called out as I checked the clock.

  I pulled a brand new simple white lace, short dress out from the box Ryan had left for me. I sank onto the bed chuckling as Emily came in rocking Mikey.

  “So what did he get you?” she asked excitedly.

  I held up the dress with tears in my eyes. I started to laugh and sniffle at the same time.

  “Oh, honey. It’s not that bad!” Emily jumped right into the perfect best friend response but she was completely off base.

  “No. This is so us. This is so freaking perfect.” I hopped up and threw on my dress. It fit like a glove and I was so freaking excited.

  After digging my cowboy boots out from the back of my closet and doing a little bit of makeup, I was all set to go.

  Ryan sent me a quick text:

  About to pull in, just come on out and get in the truck, beautiful.

  “Are you sure that you’re all right with this?” I asked Emily as I grabbed my purse from it’s hook next to the front door. I was so nervous to leave the baby for the first time.

  “Get gone! That man is waiting for you and I can handle a baby. Besides, Annie is here as backup if I need it.” Emily gestured into the living room where her daughter was sitting on the floor crosslegged watching cartoons.

  “Fine!” I hugged her, kissed Mikey on the top of his head and rushed out the door.

  Hopping into the front seat of the Bronco, I slid into the middle of the front bench seat. Ax threw his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer into his side.

  “You ready for tonight?”

  I kissed his cheek before replying, “Heck yes, I am, Mr. Axston.”

  We drove out to the back field of my parents’ place where we used to have all of our bonfires when we were growing up. The flames were already blazing and trucks were starting to park in a circle around
just like old times.

  “This is perfect.” I muttered while glancing up at my fiancé.

  “Wait, there’s one more surprise.” He parked the truck next to my brother’s and helped me slide out of the lifted vehicle.

  My brother was standing in the bed his truck, holding a binder and a microphone.

  “Come on.” Ryan led me by hand and we climbed into the bed of the Silverado.

  Nate handed a vail over to me, helping me put it on my head. “You’re going to need this, sis.” He winked and then cleared his throat before talking into the mic, “Dearly beloved, we have gathered here tonight to marry my best friend and my sister in holy matrimony.”

  Ryan beamed at me as I started to get choked up. “Wait!” I gasped. “Mikey, Emily, Annie, Fletch! They can’t miss my damn wedding.”

  “How could you ever think that we’d miss it?” Fletch yelled at me from the hood of the Bronco as he helped Annie climb into his lap. Emily was holding Mikey, rocking him softly standing in-between the two trucks.

  I started to look around at all of the people that were gathered around. Friends and family had all shown up Most of the Unacceptables, including Ryder and Raine, were standing in a semi-circle around the bed of Nate’s truck.

  Tears came to my eyes as looked into Ryan’s midnight iris. “This is perfect.” I whispered to Ryan as he took my hands into his.

  “Good. Now become my wife, damn it!” He winked before kissing my forehead.

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