The Extremely High Tide! Read online

  Usually, surfacing was the worst part of every dive. Talise always wished she could stay underwater forever.

  But for the first time, she was eager to get back to land.

  First, she was armed with new knowledge of nautical failures: that they were often for silly reasons. Second, she wanted to consult her moon and tide charts as soon as possible.

  Most of all, she couldn’t wait to tell Runa about all the marine creatures she’d seen on her dive. Sea serpents. Cannonballs. Sugar snap squid. A mermaid—

  Talise blinked behind her mask. For a second, she thought she’d glimpsed a flash of fin and dark hair.

  But that was impossible.

  She checked her dive watch again. Uh-oh. It had been seventy-four minutes. She was very, very late.

  The ocean grew warmer and brighter. Finally, her face broke the surface. She inflated her BCD, which really was a fancy kind of vest.

  WHOOOSH!

  Talise lifted her mask onto her forehead. “Runa, I apolo—” she began, then stopped as she realized Runa wasn’t alone.

  “Talise! What were you thinking!?”

  Talise’s mother and father stood beside Runa. They looked worried. They looked angry.

  And Runa looked very, very guilty.

  TALISE’S LOGBOOK

  Name: Talise Villepreux

  Date: Sunday

  Location: Endless pier

  Time in: 12:30 Time out: 14 minutes too late

  Bottom Time: 1:28

  Depth: DEEP-deep!

  Temperature: 54°F

  Visibility: Initially excellent, then dark and gloomy

  Observations:

  This dive was extremely helpful for my boatbuilding endeavor. Or rather, it should have been. Because I went deep-deep diving without a buddy, I am grounded and unable to work on my boat. Logbook, I find this extremely unfair.

  I also did not manage to locate the shipwreck in the deep-deep ocean. Perhaps the current moved it to another location? Lots of peculiar items were swirling around, too. Almost as if the ocean was trying to warn me about something . . .

  According to Jules’s reports in the Gazette, I am not the only one who believes something is on its way. I would like to discuss it further, but I know she thinks my boatbuilding endeavor is a waste of time. (Even if she is nicer about it now.)

  I suppose there is one bright side to being grounded: now I have plenty of time to consult my moon and tide charts.

  THE LIGHTHOUSE KEEPER HAS RETURNED!

  by Jules, Fifth-Grade Star Reporter

  An exciting development in the ongoing lighthouse investigation: the lighthouse keeper is back! She was first spotted in the lighthouse tower yesterday just after sunset—although it’s possible she’s been back longer and her appearance went unnoticed, as even the most vigilant reporters have lots of homework to do.

  But something is still not right. Late last night, the lighthouse began flashing all the colors of the rainbow. While the impromptu dance party on the beach seemed fun, this reporter would like to remind everyone that a lighthouse flashes lights as a WARNING. But the clam boats are all still being repaired, and there are no ships in sight. So who is the lighthouse keeper trying to warn? And what is the warning about? Something BIG, perhaps?

  Sadly, the lighthouse keeper hasn’t left the lighthouse for questioning. But this reporter vows to get her attention—even if it takes marine signal flares.

  MESSAGE FROM THE PTA PRESIDENT

  This is a reminder to all students that boatbuilding is dangerous and should be avoided. Working with wood can give you splinters, and working with tools of any sort is highly discouraged. If you are in need of a boat, please go to the boat rental shop by the docks, which has been closed indefinitely because boats are dangerous and should be avoided.

  Earl Grey had a heart full of love.

  He was a very large watch hog. So he had a very large heart.

  Like he did every morning, Earl Grey gazed at Nia while she slept. Nia was Earl Grey’s all-time favorite Nia. His love for her was as big as the sun, which was shining through their bedroom’s big bay window.

  At last, Nia woke up.

  “Earl Grey! I’ve told you, it’s a little creepy when you do that.” Nia hugged him around the neck, then opened the curtains. “Wow, what a beautiful day!”

  She tied a yellow ribbon on Earl Grey’s very curly tail.

  After Nia got ready for school, she and Earl Grey raced down the spiral staircase. They rocketed into the kitchen, where Nanny was watching telenovelas on a giant screen. Currently, two fancy-looking people were smooching.

  “Ack ew ick!” Nia exclaimed. “I hate the kissy ones.”

  “¡Cállate, mija!” Nanny said affectionately. “They’re madly in love.”

  Earl Grey wrinkled his snout. He’d never been in love, madly or otherwise. But he did love Nanny, his all-time favorite Nanny. She made chiles rellenos stuffed with oatmeal instead of seaweed. She never, ever made bacon for breakfast.

  Nanny tapped the giant screen. It switched to two even fancier people: Nia’s parents.

  “Good morning, Mama and Papa!” Nia exclaimed.

  “¡Buenos días, mija!” Nia’s parents beamed from their satellite office in Mexico City. They traveled a lot for their family’s international real estate business. Sometimes Nia went with them during school vacations. Earl Grey was thankful that didn’t happen too often, since he didn’t have a passport yet.

  ¡Buenos morning! he exclaimed. It came out “Snuffle-snuff,” but Nia’s parents seemed to understand.

  Once they hung up, Nanny kissed Nia’s forehead. Then she patted Earl Grey’s backside. “Largarse, cerdito tonto.”

  Understanding Spanish took Earl Grey a little extra effort, but he’d been studying hard so he could travel to Mexico City with Nia. So while he was pretty sure Nanny’s words translated to “Scram, silly piglet,” he knew she’d really meant See you later, my all-time favorite piglet.

  Earl Grey trotted alongside Nia as she walked to school. Some days, he went to class with her and listened to Ms. Grimalkin’s lessons. Ms. Grimalkin was Earl Grey’s all-time favorite teacher, even if her fingernails were sharp. After Earl Grey had saved the cafeteria’s milk from the mean-toothed rockycats, she’d even rewarded him with a watch-hog-size cushion to sit on.

  But on sunny days like today, Earl Grey preferred to take a stroll and say hi to all his other favorites.

  Like any honorable watch hog, he kept an eye out for anybody’s day that needed saving. Danger occurred less frequently on sunny days, but Earl Grey was always prepared.

  As he passed Hanger Cliffs Water Park, he stopped and stuck his snout through the gate. He hoped they’d reopen soon. Jules, who was Nia’s all-time favorite best friend forever (besides Earl Grey, obviously), had said the Hanger Cliffs engineers were busy designing an inner tube large enough to fit watch hogs. Apparently, nobody had informed them watch hogs float just fine on their own.

  Earl Grey withdrew his snout, then smiled as two crabs scuttled crookedly past. Since crabs tend to look a lot alike, he wasn’t sure they were his all-time favorite crabs. But they definitely weren’t spiders.

  Good días, Earl Grey began.

  Then he paused. It looked like the crabs’ claws were hooked together! Uh-oh—were they stuck?

  Earl Grey lifted his snout to the sky and sounded the alarm:

  HWEEE! HWEEE! HWEEE!

  Then he trotted over to help. His snout wasn’t as dexterous as a hand full of fingers, but still managed to unhook their claws. “Snort!” he said in triumph.

  Immediately the crabs hooked their claws together again.

  “Snort?” Earl Grey asked in confusion.

  “Clackity-click-click clack,” said the crabs.

  Understanding Crabbish took Earl Grey a little extra effort, but he was pretty sure it translated to “Scram, we’re madly in love.” The crabs weren’t stuck—they were holding claws.

  Earl Grey congratulated th
em on their madness and walked away, still feeling a little confused. But he was happy for the lovecrabs, really.

  As he passed the beach forest, he heard a loud ruckus overhead. Before he could figure out where it was coming from, something bonked him on the head.

  “Oink!” he oinked.

  It was a package wrapped in brown paper. Earl Grey’s very large heart fluttered. Was the package for him?

  No, it was addressed to the Town Committee for Lunar Consequences. Then an envelope fell into the sand, addressed to the same place. Three more came to rest beside it—along with a white feather.

  The ruckus grew louder. Earl Grey looked up and saw two seagulls perched in a tree, flapping their wings and squawking loudly at each other. The last of the mail they were supposed to be delivering tumbled to the ground. Uh-oh—were the seagulls fighting?

  Earl Grey sounded the alarm:

  HWEEE! HWEEE! HWEEE!

  Startled silent, the seagulls squinted at Earl Grey. Then they flew over and landed in front of him. “CAW,” they said. “Caw awk-caw.”

  Understanding Gully took Earl Grey a little extra effort, just like Crabbish did. But he was pretty sure it translated to “Scram, we’re madly in love.” The seagulls hadn’t been arguing—they’d been singing.

  You call that singing? said Earl Grey. It came out “Squee-hee-hee,” but the seagulls seemed to understand.

  “Awk-caw-CAW,” said one seagull, offended.

  “Snoff,” scoffed Earl Grey, equally offended. He wasn’t jealous! He was happy for the lovegulls, really. Even if his heart was starting to feel a little funny.

  He headed for the beach.

  Due to Very Low Tide, the ocean was farther away than usual. Earl Grey admired the giant pile of logs and driftwood on the sand. Nia’s classmate Talise had been gathering tree parts for the boat she wanted to build.

  Earl Grey loved boats. Maybe Talise could use some help?

  She was in class, though, and he wouldn’t want to start without her. Also, Talise had never asked for help. But then again, Earl Grey knew that not everyone asks for help when they needed it—

  “MROW!”

  Earl Grey skidded to a stop. He’d been so distracted, he’d almost trotted straight into the rocks!

  The mean-toothed rockycats didn’t seem fond of Earl Grey. Actually, they didn’t seem particularly fond of anybody in Topsea. But ever since the milk-stealing incident, they’d glared at him a little harder. And they seemed to have more mean-teeth every time they smiled.

  Particularly the pair of rockycats on the rocks in front of him. Their tails were swishing. Their yellow eyes were slits.

  “Mrowwwwwrrr . . .”

  Uh-oh—were they growling?

  Earl Grey sounded the alarm:

  HWEEE—

  Then he stopped himself. The rockycats weren’t even looking at him, he realized. They weren’t growling. They were purring.

  “Snore,” Earl Grey said.

  The rockycats purred harder. Their tails made a heart shape.

  Earl Grey had no desire to learn Rockycat, but by now he could guess what they were saying: they were madly in love.

  He was happy for the lovecats, really. But for some reason, he didn’t feel happy anymore.

  Earl Grey had always had a heart full of love, ever since he was a tiny piglet. But unlike the rockycats, the seagulls, the crabs, and the fancy people on Nanny’s telenovela, he’d never been in love. Not even with the stuffed narwhal Nia’s friend Davy had won for him at the arcade.

  Earl Grey had a heart full of heartache.

  He was a very large watch hog. So his heart ached an awful lot.

  Hanging his head, Earl Grey headed for the boardwalk. It was usually empty this time of day, and a lonely boardwalk seemed like the perfect place for an achy-hearted hog to wallow. But today, he saw somebody familiar sitting on one of the benches.

  “What’s the matter, mi cerdito tonto?” Nanny called. “Your tail is uncurled.”

  Earl Grey glanced back at his tail. It was true.

  Nanny patted the bench. “Siéntate. Tell me your troubles.”

  He shuffled over and climbed onto Nanny’s bench, trying to take up as little space as possible, which was almost all of it. He told her about the crabs, and the seagulls, and the mean-toothed rockycats. I have all this love in my heart, and nobody to give it to, he finished. It came out “Siiiiiiiigh,” but Nanny seemed to understand.

  “Love is in the air,” she told him. “Literally. I read it in this morning’s forecast.”

  Earl Grey had forgotten to check the forecast.

  Nanny retied the yellow ribbon on Earl Grey’s tail. “When everybody seems to be falling in love around you, it can make you feel a little lonely,” she went on. “But why wallow in it? You’re a strong, independent watch hog—and still a young watch hog, after all. And there’s no shortage of love in your life. Or in your heart.”

  Earl Grey raised his eyebrows. Well, sort of. He didn’t have eyebrows, but it was the thought that counted.

  Nanny chuckled. “Think about it, cerdito mío. Why did you try to save the crabs and seagulls and rock cats?”

  For fame and glory, Earl Grey said.

  But then he thought about it. And he knew the real answer.

  Because I love them, he said.

  I love the clicky-clacky crabs with their claws hooked together. I love the squawky seagulls despite their unreliability when it comes to important packages. I even love the rock cats with their glow-in-the-dark eyes and their sharp, pointy fangs. I love everybody and everywhere and everything that ever was and everything that ever will be, but not even close to how much I love my best-beloved Nia, and you, my all-time favorite Nanny.

  It came out “Oink!” but Nanny seemed to understand.

  “I love you, too, cerdito mío.”

  Earl Grey smooshed his snout against Nanny’s kneecap. And then, he heard another of his all-time favorite voices calling his all-time favorite words.

  “Earl Grey!” Nia called.

  “Squeeee!” Earl Grey replied.

  “Earl—Nanny?” Nia came running down the boardwalk. She skidded to a stop. “Is anything wrong? I heard Earl Grey’s alarm—”

  “Everything is just fine, mija,” Nanny said. “In fact, your watch hog saved the day three times today!”

  Nia gasped. “Really?”

  “Well, sort of. There were a few misunderstandings, but it’s the thought that counts.”

  Nia wedged herself onto the remaining two inches of bench. “What are you doing on the boardwalk, anyway?”

  “Enjoying a bit of sun,” Nanny replied. “I just finished playing poker with Billy and Cosmo.”

  “Wait—did you say poker?”

  “¡Claro que sí! What, you think I just cook and watch telenovelas all day?” Nanny tugged on Nia’s braid. “Sometimes Xavier joins us on the weekends.”

  “Nurse Xavier?”

  Nanny nodded. “He’s a good friend. In fact, we’re cowriting a book.”

  “That’s so cool!” Nia hugged Nanny around the neck. Then she hugged Earl Grey.

  I love you both as big as the sun, said Earl Grey. It came out “Snuffle-uffle,” but Nia and Nanny seemed to understand.

  Nia ran back to school, and Earl Grey and Nanny trotted home for lunch. Afterward, Nanny read him “This Little Piggy,” a story Earl Grey wasn’t too sure about. A pig would never eat roast beef! And he’d certainly never wee-wee-weed all the way home. (Well, maybe when he was a very little piggy.)

  He loved the story anyway.

  Maybe Earl Grey had never been in love. But he had a heart full of love and a belly full of oatmeal. And for now, that was all he needed.

  He was still a young watch hog, after all.

  Jules’s stepsister, Hazel, was factually the best investigative reporter on the planet. So when Hazel came to visit for a few days, Jules felt positive she’d help her finally solve the mystery of the lighthouse keeper’s warning.


  “Sorry, Jules,” Hazel said, pinning back her short red hair with a barrette. The barrette was a silver star, and matched her tiny nose ring. “I’d love to help you out, but I need to head to the library for some research.”

  Jules deflated. “What are you researching?”

  “I’m in the middle of a fascinating investigation on the health benefits of seaweed. There’s a lot of misinformation out there.”

  “Oh.” It sounded boring. But if Hazel said it was fascinating . . . then Jules knew it was factually fascinating.

  “Hey, why don’t you come to the library with me?” Hazel asked. “A little research might help you crack this lighthouse keeper case!”

  “Sure, I guess.” Research was Jules’s least favorite part of being a reporter. But If Hazel thought it was a good idea . . . then it was factually a good idea.

  The Topsea library was especially busy that afternoon. The BOOK CHECKOUT line was long, and the PEOPLE CHECKOUT line was even longer.

  “I guess I’ll start with books,” Hazel said. “Although there’s a seaweed-factory worker whose brain I’d love to pick, if the People Checkout line gets shorter.”

  “I’ll start with books, too,” Jules decided.

  She followed Hazel to the head librarian’s desk. Next to a tall stack of books, she saw a nameplate that said Chrissy Éclair. At first, Jules thought no one was at the desk. But then a head popped up. The head had curly black hair, brown skin, and extra-big eyes behind thick glasses with square-shaped yellow frames. The head was also attached to a neck and a body.

  Too bad, Jules thought. What a scoop that would’ve been: How Topsea’s Head Librarian Got Ahead with Only a Head!

  “Hello!” said the head librarian’s head. “How can I help you today?”

  “Hi, Ms. Éclair,” Hazel said. “I was wondering where I could find some books on the health benefits of seaweed.”