The Best-Kept Secret Read online

  “What kind of real story?” Matthew asked, locking his fingers together and resting them on top of his stomach.

  “A story about you and me.”

  Matthew raised his eyebrows.

  “When I was a small boy just like you are now, I wasn’t very happy. I didn’t have any of the things you have right here in your room or in this house, and sometimes I didn’t even have food to eat. We were very poor, and I never knew what it was like to spend time with my father. My mother tried to be there for us when she wasn’t working, but my father was never home until late at night, and there were some days when he didn’t come home at all. But no matter how many months and years passed by, I still wished for things to change. I always believed that, one day, my father would change and that he would rush home as fast as he could to tell me how much he loved me. But he never did,” Curtis said, blinking back tears. “He never took me in his arms, he never did anything.”

  “Dad, why are you crying?”

  “Because, son, after all these years, it still hurts me sometimes.” Curtis wiped his face with both hands. Matthew’s eyes filled with water, and Curtis placed his hands on top of his son’s.

  “I didn’t mean to upset you, but it’s important for you to know that not everyone has had the best life and not everyone is perfect. Not even me.”

  “But you are. You’re the best person in the whole world and you can do anything,” Matthew said proudly. “I always tell Jonathan and Elijah that, and even when they say that nobody can do everything, I still tell them you can.”

  “Well, I appreciate that, but unfortunately, they’re right. I can’t do everything. But there are two things I can do and the two things you will always be able to count on no matter what. I’ll always love you, and I’ll always be here for you.”

  Matthew smiled.

  “And there’s something else I need to say while it’s on my heart. I know you look up to me, and I’m very happy about that, but there was a time, before I met you, when I wasn’t such a good person. I did some things that God wasn’t happy with, and I had to pay some major consequences for them.”

  “You mean like when you got shot back in Chicago?”

  “Yes, like that.”

  “Well, if God made you all better, then that means he’s not mad at you anymore.”

  Curtis couldn’t help chuckling. “I guess maybe it does, doesn’t it?”

  “Yep,” Matthew said, smiling.

  “God does forgive us, but it’s so much easier if we do what he expects from us from the start. So, no matter how old you get or how successful you become, son, always try to do the right thing. Always try to treat people the way you want to be treated. Always keep God first in your life from now on.”

  Curtis grabbed his son in a bear hug and held him for longer than usual. Shortly after, Matthew slid out of bed, onto the floor, to recite his prayers. When he finished, Curtis tucked him in again, kissed his forehead, and left the room.

  When he went back into his own bedroom, Curtis heard the shower still running. Maybe Charlotte was a lot more relaxed now, so he removed the rest of his clothing and cracked open the pewter-trimmed shower door. “Want some company?”

  Charlotte jerked her head around.

  “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  “You didn’t,” she said. “I guess my mind was somewhere else.”

  “Well, do you?” Curtis said, taking one step inside the shower.

  “What?”

  “Want some company?”

  “Baby, not tonight. I’m really, really exhausted, and all I want to do now is get some sleep.”

  “If not tonight, then when?” he yelled without planning to. He’d just told his son about doing the right thing and about treating people the way he wanted to be treated, and now here he was totally irritated with his own wife.

  “Tomorrow,” she said, turning off the water and reaching for her towel.

  Curtis stepped away, leaned against his vanity, and crossed his arms. “You were tired last night and the night before that, too. And as a matter of fact, last night, you didn’t even get home until after eleven. So, what’s going on, Charlotte?”

  “Nothing. You know how many hours I’ve been working, and then we have church every Sunday and, of course, meetings like we did tonight. I’m just tired. That’s all.”

  “Well, where exactly do I come in? And when do you plan on spending some real time with your son for that matter?” Curtis couldn’t believe he was sounding like his former wives. He was repeating some of the same words they had spoken to him only a few years ago.

  “When this trial is over. I already told you that. And if it wasn’t for all this church business, I could spend more time with Matthew.”

  “No, if you quit that job of yours, you’d have time to be a good wife and a good mother.”

  “Well, I’ve already told you. That’s never going to happen. Not as long as you continue earning what you do from the church.”

  “It’s always about money with you, isn’t it?”

  “As a matter of fact it is. And if I remember correctly, money used to be important to you, too.”

  “Well, it’s not anymore. You and Matthew are.”

  “Please. If that were true, you’d find a way to give us a lot more. You talked a real good game before I married you, and now two years later, we’re basically still living a middle-class lifestyle.”

  “What is it you want me to do? I mean, every dime of your paycheck is yours. I pay all the bills, and I even give you money for groceries. And sometimes I give you money just because.”

  “And that’s fine, but all I’m saying is, you don’t earn enough for me to quit my job. And I can’t help the fact that my firm needs me to work late from time to time.”

  “No, lately, it’s all the time, and something has got to change.”

  “Well, I’ve already told you. I’m not quitting my job.”

  Charlotte dried her back, threw the towel across a hook, and walked out of the bathroom. She never even looked back at Curtis.

  What in the world was wrong with her? Why was she being so cruel and cold-natured toward him? Every couple had problems, but Charlotte was acting as if she couldn’t stand to be naked in front of him. She acted as though she didn’t want him touching her.

  She was making him feel unsure about himself and about their marriage. He hoped this wasn’t all he could expect, not with him being 100 percent faithful to her.

  He prayed that God would end these sudden marital issues.

  Charlotte climbed into bed and turned her back to Curtis. She hated arguing with him, and, she had to admit, this was their worst disagreement ever. He was becoming more and more impatient in regard to their lovemaking, but she couldn’t help herself. It wasn’t that she didn’t desire him, it was just that she wanted Aaron more. He was so much more interesting and daring and the reason she could barely contain herself during the meeting. For months, she’d begged him not to sit directly across from her, but he never listened. And while she knew it was horribly wrong, it turned her on. The fact that she and Aaron were sneaking off together multiple times per week without anyone at the church realizing it was sort of fascinating. It was almost like the whole secrecy of their sexcapades made them that much more mesmerizing. And mesmerized she was. Twice this evening, she’d had to stop herself from staring at Aaron, hoping that no one had seen her. Hoping that Curtis hadn’t paid any attention to what she was doing. But of course he probably hadn’t since he’d been so consumed with his meeting agenda.

  She heard Curtis breathing a lot deeper than when she’d first laid down and was glad he hadn’t started another argument or tried to touch her.

  More than that, she was glad he didn’t know the real reason she couldn’t make love to him.

  God forgive her.

  Only hours ago, during her lunch break, Aaron had sucked the upper inside of her right thigh so intensely, she now had a purple bruise plastered across it.
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  She’d begged him to stop, but he’d ignored her. She’d told him that Curtis would kill her if he ever discovered it. But Aaron never broke his rhythm.

  Finally, Charlotte had given in and enjoyed what he was doing to her.

  She begged him to do whatever he wanted.

  Chapter 6

  CHARLOTTE GLANCED AT HER WATCH AND SAW THAT IT WAS ALMOST ten o’clock. She was sitting in her office, meeting with a client who had hired her firm to handle all of her estate matters. The woman was seventy-two, recently widowed, and filthy rich. Meredith Connolly Christiansen was undeniably the classiest woman Charlotte had ever met. Over the last forty years, her husband had founded two manufacturing companies, purchased two hotels, and opened a very ritzy restaurant. But now everything had fallen to Meredith, and since she had never been too fond of her husband’s longtime legal team, she’d contacted Schaefer, Williamson, and Goldberg to take over. Charlotte’s bosses couldn’t have been happier, and Charlotte was thrilled to be handling some of the smaller aspects of what Meredith had hired them to do. Right now, Charlotte was waiting for her to finish signing a couple of documents pertaining to her health-care power of attorney. She’d decided to name her oldest daughter as the person responsible for making these particular decisions.

  “Well, I think that should do it,” Meredith said, smiling.

  “I think so, and we’ll get copies made of everything and delivered over to you sometime next week.”

  “You know, it’s been six months now since Harry passed away, and still, I have to remind myself that he’s really gone.”

  “Mrs. Christiansen, I can only imagine.”

  Meredith gave Charlotte a stern, yet playful look.

  “I mean, Meredith.”

  “Now, that’s better. The one policy my husband enforced at all five of his businesses was that he wanted everyone on a first-name basis. Said it just wasn’t necessary to make anyone feel as though they were beneath him or any other executive. And personally, I always loved that policy, because it makes people feel a lot more comfortable when they are trying to communicate with you.”

  “I agree. But sometimes I forget, because my parents taught me to use Mr. and Mrs. at a very young age. They always felt that a younger person should, as they put it, ‘add some gravy’ to someone’s last name out of respect. Specifically, when speaking to elders.”

  “And there’s nothing wrong with that. But with me, you don’t have to add anything. I prefer everything to be straight, no chaser.”

  They both laughed and Charlotte thought about how spunky Meredith was. She’d lost her husband, yet she was so vibrant and full of conversation. Not to mention, she looked better than most women in their sixties. She’d definitely taken care of herself, and if Curtis would find the ambition he once had, there would be more than enough money for Charlotte to do the same. She’d be able to get weekly facials, body massages, body wraps, and anything else she needed. She’d be able to pay for anything she wanted—even cosmetic surgery when it became necessary.

  “So enough about me,” Meredith said. “Let’s talk about you. When are you going to stop doing this paralegal thing and go back to school to get your law degree?”

  “To be honest, I’ve never considered doing that.”

  “And why not? Because after meeting with you on three separate occasions, I can see that you are definitely capable. You’d make a fine attorney. There’s no doubt about it.”

  “I don’t know. My husband and I have a son to raise, and we have a church to run.”

  “I remember you mentioning that the last time I was here, but my question to you is, what do you want?”

  “The truth?”

  “I wouldn’t want to hear anything else.”

  “I’d love to be like you.”

  “And how’s that?”

  “I’d love nothing more than to be married to a man like Mr. Christiansen.”

  “Really? You’re sure about that?”

  “Yes. Because what I want is not to want for anything. I know it sounds selfish, but that’s what I truly want in life. I want the best for my son and myself for the rest of our lives.”

  Meredith laughed. “Then, young lady, you have a lot to learn.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “Because being rich and having the best of everything doesn’t mean that you’re going to be happy. As a matter of fact, if Harry hadn’t been so ambitious, as you put it, he might have been in the country when our first daughter was born, and he might have spent more time trying to help our youngest daughter stop using drugs. I did the best I could as a mother and sent her to the best treatment facilities in this country, but it was her father’s attention that she wanted. She begged him to spend more time with her, but his work was always more important. The man actually thought that giving an eighteen-year-old a brand-new Mercedes and a credit card with no limit was going to make everything better. Can you believe he thought everything would be fine after that? That he actually thought he could fix our daughter’s problems with money?”

  Charlotte was speechless. She was shocked at what she was hearing about Mr. Christiansen and even more shocked that Meredith was telling her about any of this.

  “But when it was all said and done, Harry finally fixed things all right. He fixed things real good, because shortly after Bethany got that car, she committed suicide.”

  “I’m so sorry,” Charlotte said, covering her mouth.

  “So, you see, ambition isn’t always a good thing. It needs to be taken in moderation just like anything else. And don’t get me started on all the women Harry slept with over the years. Secretaries, colleagues, you name it. But through it all, I pretended to be happy, and I told myself that I should just be thankful for all the things he’d given me. I told myself that at the end of the day, I was Mrs. Harry Christiansen, the richest wife in Mitchell.”

  Charlotte heard what Meredith was saying, but while she would never admit it, she wanted the whole package. She wanted Curtis to sleep with only her and make a ton of money. She wanted him to be the husband he’d said he was going to be before they’d left Chicago. Maybe it wasn’t logical thinking, but that’s what she wanted. She deserved to have all of that and then some, because Curtis had promised her the world right after he was shot. He’d promised her everything in exchange for her standing by him no matter what. Even after he’d been ousted from two different churches. Even when he’d said he wanted to move to a small town like this one. But if she couldn’t have everything and had to choose between a happy marriage and a lot of money, the money was her choice by far.

  “I had no idea,” Charlotte said.

  “Most people see what they want to see. Don’t you think?”

  “To a certain extent, but usually when you speak of your husband, you talk about how much you miss him.”

  “Because I do. I miss him more than you could possibly ever know. Harry and I had fifty years of history together. And regardless of how many unhappy times there were, we did have many that were enjoyable. But what I regret is that I didn’t do something I wanted to do career-wise. I regret that I didn’t focus on something that was just about me for at least a few hours of every day. Because after all these years, all I can say is that I was Harry Christiansen’s wife, I sat on a few boards, I ran a few charities, and I went to the country club on a regular basis. So, you tell me, how great was all of that?”

  “Maybe you didn’t get to have your own career, but I still think you’ve had a wonderful life.”

  “Then, it’s like I said, you’ve got a lot more to learn and a lot more to experience. As time goes on, you’ll begin to see what’s really important and what doesn’t matter at all.”

  “Well, I do agree with you about one thing.”

  “Which is?”

  “That I should have something that I do just for me, and that’s why I won’t quit working here at the firm the way my husband wants me to. He keeps asking me to come work at the church full-t
ime, and it’s his belief that I would be able to spend more time with him and our son if I did.”

  “It seems that nowadays, there are many pastors’ wives that play a major role in their church’s leadership, but, and this is just my opinion, I think it can only work if the wife truly wants to do that. It should not be a forced situation. But I will say this, if your job is taking you away from your son and your husband more than you know it should be, you shouldn’t overlook that either. I’m not saying you should stop working altogether, but maybe you need to reevaluate your workload. Okay?”

  “I will.”

  “I’m not trying to tell you what to do, but spending or not spending enough time with your family can make it or break it. And please don’t ever forget that.”

  “I won’t.”

  “Well, I guess I should get off my soapbox and let you get back to work.” Meredith stood up and smoothed her hands across the tan-colored tailored suit she was wearing. Charlotte would give anything to dress like her.

  “Thanks for coming in, Meredith, and as always it’s been a pleasure chatting with you.”

  “I like you a lot, Charlotte, and if you ever need anything, anything at all, you have my number.”

  “You’re too kind, and I really appreciate hearing that.” Charlotte shook Meredith’s hand and escorted her toward the door.

  “And when school is out next month, maybe you can bring your son out to see the horses. I’m sure he’d love that.”

  “I’m sure he would.”

  “You take care.”

  “You, too,” Charlotte said and closed her door.

  Women like Meredith didn’t come along every day. Wealthy, yet noticeably down-to-earth. And Charlotte admired her. She was sorry that Meredith’s marriage hadn’t been as wonderful as she’d wanted, but from where Charlotte was sitting, life had still been exceptional for her. As a matter of fact, Charlotte was starting to believe that the word happiness could only be defined on a case-by-case basis. It basically depended on the wants and desires of any given individual.