The Love Note Read online

  Praise for Finding Lady Enderly

  “There’s a captivating sense of gothic tension filling Finding Lady Enderly, a romance that mixes suspense, a rags-to-riches Cinderella story, elements of faith and class division, all in one fascinating wrapper.”

  All About Romance

  “Finding Lady Enderly by Joanna Davidson Politano is an emotionally tugging tale. . . . I was in suspense the whole time. . . . I cannot wait to read more historical novels by this talented writer.”

  Urban Lit Magazine

  “Joanna Davidson Politano has a gift for blending historical romance with just the right amount of intrigue and mystery and has captivated readers with her award-winning books Lady Jayne Disappears and A Rumored Fortune. Now she sweeps readers away to Victorian England in her latest novel, Finding Lady Enderly.”

  Suzanne Woods Fisher

  “Whimsy. Intrigue. Danger and tenderness. Finding Lady Enderly is an endearing tale that grabbed me right from the beginning and held on until the last page. Travel along with heroine Raina Bretton as she wrestles with not only Lady Enderly’s identity but her own—which begs the question for us all to ponder who we are at heart. An excellent read!”

  Michelle Griep, Christy award–winning author of the Once Upon a Dickens Christmas series

  “With haunting prose, Joanna Davidson Politano delivers a story worthy of lining the shelves with other classics of mystery, romance, and misplaced heroines. In a literary form that harkens to the Brontë sisters, Finding Lady Enderly delivers a compelling and thoughtful journey into the cynical world of inheritance, the heartfelt loyalty of childhood love, and the lingering question that overshadows them all: where is Lady Enderly? A dead-or-alive ghost story of sorts, it will keep you looking over your shoulder and hearing whispers of intrigue all the way to the final page. I cannot recommend Joanna Davidson Politano enough!”

  Jaime Jo Wright, Daphne du Maurier and Christy award–winning author of The House on Foster Hill

  Books by Joanna Davidson Politano

  Lady Jayne Disappears

  A Rumored Fortune

  Finding Lady Enderly

  The Love Note

  © 2020 by Joanna Davidson Politano

  Published by Revell

  a division of Baker Publishing Group

  PO Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287

  www.revellbooks.com

  Ebook edition created 2020

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.

  ISBN 978-1-4934-2660-7

  Unless otherwise noted, Scripture used in this book, whether quoted or paraphrased by the characters, is taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

  Scripture quotations labeled ESV are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ESV Text Edition: 2016

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  This is for the #POstables—

  especially Amy, Joy, and Crissy.

  You are all a joy to know.

  Contents

  Cover

  Praise for Finding Lady Enderly

  Half Title Page

  Books by Joanna Davidson Politano

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Dedication

  1

  2

  3

  4

  5

  6

  7

  8

  9

  10

  11

  12

  13

  14

  15

  16

  17

  18

  19

  20

  21

  22

  23

  24

  25

  26

  27

  28

  29

  30

  31

  32

  33

  Discussion Questions

  Sneak Peek of Joanna’s Newest Novel

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Back Ads

  Back Cover

  one

  There are two ways to truly know a person—one is to begin a friendship with them. The other is to end it.

  ~A scientist’s observations on love

  BRIGHTON, ENGLAND, 1865

  It always came to this, didn’t it? Amid the glittering swirl of music and gowns, I looked up into the handsome face of Lord Cumberland and forced a smile as if nothing at all were about to happen.

  He leaned close. “It’s time we spoke privately.”

  No. No, not privately. I looked up, willing it not to be so, but his face was sober. Determined. Decided.

  And things had been going so well between us.

  I tried to swallow. Tried and failed. The grand affair swelled around me, sparkling beneath the crystal chandeliers. The vibrant music, the swish of gowns and shoes, faded into the background as our eyes met over the cup of cider he handed me with a lingering touch, and I couldn’t look away. Good gracious, how I wanted to, but his gaze was relentless. Searching. Full of anticipation. Of course, to make matters worse, he was terribly handsome in that dark and reckless sort of way. Bows continued to hum over violin strings, shoes beating a rhythm on the wood floor, as if life weren’t shifting dramatically in this shadowed corner by the drink table.

  Cumberland glanced toward my father, the great Dr. Phineas Duvall, who was spouting his opinions to a senator and two solicitors across the grand parlor, then back to me with a self-satisfied smile. Unfortunately, the coast was clear. “Suppose we stroll out to the balcony?”

  I was going to be sick. I forced a brilliant smile. “Oh, come now, I’ve hardly danced.”

  His brows knit. “Are there other men with whom you were hoping to dance?”

  “Of course not.” Too quick. Too eager. My voice had pitched higher than old widow Tarskin’s roof. I took his arm, looking straight ahead at the dreaded balcony where words would be exchanged and futures altered.

  Staring down the barrel of my fourth marriage proposal left me cold and shaky. I had no remedy in our little clinic for what I now faced, no antidote to reverse it.

  An evening breeze slipped through the curtains from the balcony and cooled my face. “You’d have me catch my death, would you?” I kept my tone light and swept toward the waiter carrying a tray of tarts. I turned back to make another cheeky comment, but Lord Cumberland’s eyes were brimming with the unasked question.

  “Just for a moment.” He moved close and I felt his breath. “I promise to keep you warm.”

  My arms prickled inside my long gloves. His voice felt invasive. Intimate. I glanced around for Father, but he had stepped out, likely to discuss the never-ending research for his new clinic. How I wish I could trade that discussion for the one being thrust upon me.

  Cumberland leaned down, his hand cupping my elbow. “Come now, you know I’m a gentleman.”

  But I didn’t know. How could I? With chaperoned outings and puddle-deep conversations, we were strangers. Yet he was about to suggest we share a home, our lives, ourselves, for good. Oh, heavens.

  What was wrong
with me, anyway? Hadn’t men and women been stepping into such a promise for centuries? Willingly, no less.

  With an impulsive smile, I grabbed his hand. “Come. I’ve not given you your dance yet.”

  His look darkened. “There’s no need—”

  “Of course there is.” I could be relentless too. “I promised you, didn’t I? And I never make a promise I don’t intend to keep. Ever.” I let my gaze linger, but his expression didn’t register understanding. Only frustration at the interruption to his plans.

  With a set jaw, he swept me into the dance, and the familiar rhythm pulled us along.

  His voice was terse. Acidic. “I suppose this is the most privacy you will afford me tonight, so I’ll simply have to pose my question here.”

  “What could two friends have to say to one another that couldn’t be said on a dance floor?” He’d been such a good friend too. Quite diverting.

  He spun me close in the waltz. “You know I want more, Miss Duvall.” His mint-laced breath washed over my face. Deeper meaning darkened his eyes.

  Innocent. Look innocent. Smile. “Nothing is greater than friendship.”

  “Willa—”

  “Especially when I’m so busy helping Father. He has more patients than he can tend, and plans for a most brilliant clinic.”

  “You wouldn’t have to do that anymore. I’m offering you a fine home in Manchester.”

  Offering four walls, closing in around me.

  “I’m trying to rescue you from all this. You don’t deserve what’s been heaped upon you.”

  Rescue me from a rich and glorious life, working beside a most beloved father? Rescue me from saving lives, from pouring myself out for the broken and desperately needy? And he was right—I had done nothing to deserve the beauty and richness of my life.

  His arms framed me in a way that was strong and guiding, yet restrictive. “Please. I can give you everything you desire.”

  But no one seemed to recognize what that was—least of all the men who proposed.

  My heart sifted through tender memories from earlier this day. A new child entering the world. A man whose foot had been spared by my work and a girl whose life had been saved. I had saved a life. A whole life. How could anyone think I’d wish that taken away from me? We twirled faster and harder, my heart thudding the rhythm.

  I recalled the girl’s mum clinging to that dear child, sobbing in messy relief. Even now I had a lump in my throat thinking about it. I wasn’t ready to stop having days like this. Not for any man in the world. I lifted my chin and looked directly into his handsome face. “I’m sorry, but I cannot accept your offer.”

  He blinked. “You are refusing me?”

  “Most apologetically, but firmly.” I was probably the only girl who would. Myles Cumberland was a squire’s son, well-educated and handsome to boot.

  His neat mustache twitched. “After all the time we’ve spent together, I demand a reason.”

  “As for the time together, my reason is simply that I enjoyed your company as another human being. As for the refusal . . . I cannot say.” How desperately I wished to, for the truth burned my tongue, but I restrained myself. There lay the problem with every failed courtship I’d ever experienced—the men had expected to lay claim to all I was, minus my brain. Female intelligence was an unwelcome intruder in every romance. But why? Why?

  The music crescendoed and his voice grew loud. Urgent. “I must request that you tell me.”

  I racked my brain, but found it overrun with patient data, clinical trials, and the periodic table, of all things. “We are not suited. Oil and water. Sodium and nitrogen.”

  He frowned. “Sodium and . . . ?”

  “Nitrogen is stable, and sodium would never react with it. In fact, sodium is stored—”

  “In the queen’s English, please.”

  I sighed. “There’s no combustion, no change to either element. They’re a terrible combination.” His eyes narrowed, and I pushed myself to land closer to the truth. “I do not have feelings for you that a wife should possess for her husband.”

  “Perhaps I can change your mind.”

  Not unless you can change yourself. I cut my thoughts short before they tumbled out of my mouth. “I’m sorry, but my answer is firm. I cannot marry you.”

  He glared with the threat of argument in his eye.

  Louder. Firmer. I collided into his arms as he stopped. “Myles, I do not love you.”

  I froze in the sudden awareness that the music had ended—before I’d made my bold pronouncement. Chittering laughter and whispers filled the silence, and heat spidered up my face.

  He stepped back and cleared his throat, voice low and private. “Well, now. It must be true, for you’ve ensured there are a hundred witnesses to verify your blatant lack of affection.”

  “Myles, please don’t—”

  “Good evening, Miss Duvall.” He bowed deeply. “Good evening, and goodbye.”

  I escaped home and up to my attic room with a sickened heart, a biting conscience, and a burgundy-colored stain on my gown where I’d collided with someone’s drink. Fanny, our only maid, loosened the fastenings of my gown, then I dismissed her in a fit of agitation and pulled off the heavy gown myself. I had yet to face Father, who had buried himself deep in conversation at the reception. Hopefully the carriage had already returned for him so he wouldn’t be stranded long. I let down my hair, the great untamable mass of curls, and finished undressing.

  Down to my chemise and stays, I donned a soft wrapper and shoved aside the notebooks and medical journals cluttering my desk. A little framed portrait smiled up at me and I leaned close to it. “Mama, I said no again.” I touched her face, forever preserved in the sepia-colored daguerreotype. It was a strange, rather starkly empty world when one’s mother was no longer in it, but here in this private attic dormer room, I felt traces of her. “I said no this morning to a doctor who tried to brush aside my concerns, and I saved a girl’s life. Then I said no to a man who wished to marry me . . . and I believe I saved my own.” I laid my cheek on the desk, tracing her gentle eyes. “Are you terribly disappointed?”

  Her warm smile made it impossible to think she would be.

  Yet the truth remained. I had a problem. Spinsterhood was setting in like a malignant disease, and I had an adverse reaction to the only remedy—marriage. I pulled out my lined notebook and fitted the last nib to my pen. It was time to address the illness, look for patterns, and determine an acceptable treatment.

  The inevitable result of any friendship with the opposite gender seems to be, unequivocally, romance and matrimony—or a complete break. Therefore, the solution is that I must either give myself over to such a fate or end all friendships with the entire male population.

  I recalled the bouncing lanterns of Lord Cumberland’s retreating carriage. Perhaps a lack of men in my life wouldn’t be terrible.

  How anyone can find a remedy of any sort in—

  The nib popped off my pen and went flying, rolling into the dark crevice on the left side of the desk. I attacked the little space with a hat pin, threading the nib out, and something crinkled as the nib inched out. I prodded deeper. A lovely vellum envelope appeared, still folded and sealed with wax, the corners softened by years. How long had it been there? I looked over the unmarked missive with delight, only hesitating a moment before breaking the seal and feasting on the lines meant for someone else.

  Dear one,

  I have no business writing to you, and I’m not certain I’ll even have the courage to deliver this, but I must open my overfull heart and let it spill onto the page. I have no right to care for you, but it simply wasn’t a choice. You inspired in me a passion both bright and deep when I wasn’t looking, and I cannot help but feel you are a sort of clever thief. As I’ve watched your nature unfold, it leaves me breathless with wonder and profound respect for who you are, and involuntarily craving more of you.

  Lest you think my affections misplaced, let me remind you that I’ve known
you long enough to see it all. I’ve seen the strength and kindness you believe go unnoticed, watched when you thought no one was looking, and observed what exists below the surface. I know your strengths, and I know most of your weaknesses too—know them and appreciate them as part of the person I have come to admire deeply, the one who has now utterly and unexpectedly captured my heart after all this time. I marvel at the way you are, those strengths and weaknesses woven so deftly together, driving you through life with such passion and sometimes holding you back until I simply want to wrap my arms around you and whisper everything I’ve tried to say in this letter.

  I even know that secret you hoped to keep from everyone. Yes, I know all of it, and I choose you in spite of—or maybe because of—all those things. I choose those unbelievable strengths, those weaknesses you try to hide—every bit of it because it’s all you, and I choose you. Every day, every moment, I choose you.

  You needn’t feel any obligation concerning me. My deepest wish is simply to openhandedly offer up to you these words of affection, that you might walk through your day knowing someone loves you and finds you remarkable. Dearest, if only you could see yourself from where I stand—how brave and unstoppable you would become. I want that for you, more than I want a return for my affection.

  If this letter finds you favorably disposed toward me, I’ll be happy beyond all comprehension. If I hear nothing from you, I will cut all ties to Crestwicke and go far away, for I cannot bear to remain. Even then I would not forget you. Every time I smell forget-me-nots, I will think of you . . . and remember.

  Warmly, your most affectionate and ardent admirer

  I drank it all in, the painfully authentic words wrapping themselves around my heart, and I could not look away. I’d made the right decision each time I’d said no, because every romance I’d ever encountered was nothing compared to the passion and devotion in this single page. What a farce they all seemed in comparison.

  I fitted nib to pen and wrote again.

  My adverse response to the cure of spinsterhood may indicate a problem with the treatment rather than the patient. The missing ingredient in the tonics I’ve been offered is authenticity. A thick coating of that, and I should be able to swallow any marriage without breaking out in hives.