Under His Skin Read online

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” he demanded finally, desperate for her to say something, anything to give him a clue to what she was thinking.

  Ana stepped closer, her eyes still unfocused, her gaze locked on his face. “You have a god’s gift of healing.” Suddenly she turned to the toos, staring at the bandage over his wound. “And you used it to heal a creature who eats your people for sport.”

  “Brec, how could you?”

  “Katie, I had no choice. Alaunus won’t allow me to withhold his gift from anyone. If I’d refused, I could have lost this power.”

  Katie’s glistening black eyes flashed as she glared at Brec. “He is a toos! His kind ate my cousin—you knew that!”

  Misery clutched Brec’s chest, squeezing his heart till he swore it was bleeding. “Katie, I had no choice,” he said again.

  “Micah would never have done such a thing,” Katie hissed. “Micah would have finished that toos off! He would have protected us.”

  The memory sank its teeth into Brec’s soul, tormenting him just as much today as it had two years ago. It had been the first time a toos had come to him for healing—and he’d prayed to Alaunus himself that it would be the last. He stared down at the unconscious man on Ana’s table. As his eyes traveled over the bandage that he himself had applied, he imagined he could actually see the toos’ flesh knitting back together, it’s dorsal fin rising out of the human skull.

  Fury spiked inside him, sharp and painful. He clenched his teeth together so hard his jaw ached, fisting his hands at his sides as he struggled with the urge rip the bandage from the toos’ head and heave him out the door and down to the sea where his brethren could find his carcass.

  “You think I like using this gift on him?” Brec snapped. He whirled around, unable to even look at his handiwork anymore. “That . . . thing brings nothing but pain to this world. He doesn’t just kill my people, he kills his own. The toos are a bunch of barbaric cannibals who feel nothing but hunger. They want food and power and the only way they get either is through violence. If any creature deserved to die—no, not just die, to suffer, than it’s that thing on your table.”

  Suddenly, something hit him in the back of the head. A tiny spot erupted in pain as the force of whatever had hit him rocked his head forward. Yelling out in pain, Brec grabbed the back of his skull and whipped around. His gaze immediately went to the toos, but the injured barbarian still lie there unconscious.

  “What the fuck was that?” he muttered, rubbing the sore spot blossoming on the back of his head. He frowned. “Where’s that pixie?”

  He glanced around the room, searching for the tiny fey. He didn’t know what might have motivated Nu to throw something at him, but he was pretty certain he had. After all, Ana hadn’t moved. He raised his gaze to Ana and froze.

  The intensity in her gaze was still there, but the hint of awe and the open hope were gone. Now she stared at him as if he’d just clubbed a baby seal.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?” she whispered.

  Chapter 13

  It wasn’t fair. It just wasn’t fair.

  Ana fought to suppress the trembling in her body, an unfortunate result of the frustration howling through her blood. How could life be so cruel? How could they put a healer with such a gift in front of her—a beacon of hope for her skin that couldn’t be healed by ordinary means—only to blacken that hope with the righteous venom spewing from the selkie’s mouth?

  “You think I like using this gift on him . . . . If any creature deserved to die—no, not just die, to suffer, than it’s that thing on your table.”

  “Excuse me?” Brec stared at her, a look of stupefied shock on his face.

  Ana didn’t answer. She couldn’t concentrate enough to answer, not with the horrible scene playing on in her tortured imagination.

  “I didn’t want to show you these skins before because I was afraid you’d find my skin and you would destroy it to punish me.” Ana clasped her skin to her chest before forcing herself to hold it out to Brec. “Now, I’m asking you for help. Will you use Alaunus’ gift to heal my skin?”

  Brec’s face contorted with disdain. Ana cried out as he snatched her skin away.

  “You don’t deserve Alaunus’ gift! You deserve to suffer for what you’ve done.”

  A scream echoed through the earthen room beneath her basement as Brec touched the match to her skin . . .

  “Ana!”

  Tears burned her eyes as her body pitched forward. The whole room swung wildly around her as her brain scrambled back and forth from fantasy to reality. She’d been so close to asking him. He had such a gift, she hadn’t realized he had such a gift. She’d been about to ask him. Stupid, stupid girl, she’d almost surrendered her skin to a man who brandished morality like a weapon.

  Strong arms closed around her waist and legs as Brec swept her up into his arms. She wanted to fight him, but the air around her seemed to have turned to sludge. Every breath, every movement, required so much effort. It had been so long since she’d felt hope that strong, so long since she’d really and truly believed that she might get her skin back. To have it ripped away so suddenly and replaced by an even stronger fear of losing it forever, was almost more than she could bear.

  “The tides take it, what’s wrong with you?” Brec sputtered, panic vibrating the air around him. “Ana?”

  “Why do you even bother to heal him?” she mumbled miserably. “If he deserves to die, then why not just let him die?’

  “I don’t have a choice.” Brec’s hands tightened, his voice thick with frustration. “Alaunus’ gift has to be used as he sees fit. That means I’m required to help anyone who comes to me for healing—whether I want to or not. If there’s even the slightest possibility that I can help them, I have to do it. If I refuse, Alaunus could take my gift away and my people would lose the benefit of the fastest and strongest healing magic we have.” He looked down at Ana’s face, pain in his eyes. “Believe me, I don’t want to help him. I hate giving comfort to someone who’s brought so much pain and death to my people. If I could make him suffer without risking losing Alaunus’ gift, I would do it.”

  “Shut up!”

  Ana shoved against his chest and then screamed as Brec almost dropped her onto the floor. His large frame pitched forward as he scrambled to stay upright without dropping her. He sputtered as he regained his feet.

  “Are you insane?” he gasped, setting her down on her feet.

  She growled in frustration as she fought to get away from him without falling on her ass. Anger made her movements clumsy and she ended up stumbling away from him and almost falling on top of the toos’ body. She steadied herself with a hand on the table.

  “What is wrong with you?” Brec half-shouted. “You think I like using my gift this way? I—”

  “You are a healer. It’s your job to help people who need it, not to judge them for their crimes!”

  Brec froze, confusion furrowing his eyebrows. Ana straightened her spine, glaring at him with all the rage she could muster. She didn’t understand this selkie. She didn’t understand how a man could seem so naïve, so sweet, and then act like such a sanctimonious bastard. How could anyone with a gift for healing like he had have such a strong desire to cause people pain? Why did he have such an urge to judge? What on earth had Alaunus been thinking when he gave this selkie such wonderful healing powers?

  “You’re angry with me . . . because I don’t want to heal a toos?’

  Ana crossed her arms. “I’m angry with you because you’re a judgmental prick who thinks his god-given powers of healing make him a god. You think you’re better than other people. You sit up there on your high-horse and pass judgment on the people who come to you for help.”

  “I healed him, didn’t I?’ Brec sputtered.

  “And what did you use to heal him? Lemon balm, chamomile, aloe, and cayenne pepper? None of those is for pain relief.” She narrowed her eyes. “As a matter of fact, the cayenne pepper was unneces
sary since you already used lemon balm. That was just to cause him pain, wasn’t it?”

  Brec’s jaw dropped. “Who’s the healer here, me or you?” he snapped finally.

  “Good question,” Ana fired back.

  “Cayenne is an anti-inflammatory.”

  “So is lemon balm. And the lavender would have eased his pain, but you didn’t use it.”

  “Oh, for the love of Kamoho, will both of you silence yourselves?”

  Ana and Brec both whipped around to stare at the toos. His black eyes were still closed, but now his lids were wrinkled as if he were squeezing them shut deliberately. Ana stepped closer to the table as he raised his hands to rub his temples.

  “You’re awake,” she said softly. Giving Brec one last scathing glance, she turned her attention to the injured man on her table. Now that Brec had made his feelings toward the man abundantly clear, she was more determined than ever to help him. Someone had to withhold judgment long enough to see him grow well enough to return to the sea.

  “Indeed, it would be hard for even the dead to keep their peace with the two of you shouting like that,” the toos grumbled.

  He cracked open one eye, fixing that bottomless black stare on Ana’s face. Her pulse sped up, adrenaline sizzling in her veins. Despite his weakened state, there was no mistaking that eye for anything but a predator. Now that she knew what he was, she could picture that bottomless black eye in the body of his true form. She had a brief moment of imagining herself in the water with his sleek torpedo shaped body, that empty black eye showing no emotion as a mouth full of teeth opened wide . . .

  “What’s your name?” Ana asked, forcing her voice to be calm and light even as she shoved the nightmarish image away. She didn’t want to show the same judgment Brec had. As far as she was concerned, the toos was no more evil than anyone else and she wouldn’t judge him poorly just because his other form was a shark.

  “You may call me Mano,” the toos mumbled. “Now please, do stop shouting.”

  “I’m sorry,” Ana said sincerely. She glared at Brec again. “I was just discussing Brec’s healing tactics.”

  “Ah, yes, the cayenne pepper.” The toos winced. “That explains the burning.”

  “It was unnecessary and I can’t believe he did that,” Ana hissed.

  The toos opened both eyes and frowned at her. “You can’t believe he did that? I’m surprised he didn’t apply the medicine with the sharp end of a blade. Our people are mortal enemies, he has every reason to want me to suffer.” He tilted his head, wincing as he did so. “If I may ask, why are you so upset by what he did?”

  Ana stared at him in dumbfounded confusion. “Why would I possibly condone torturing someone who’s already in pain?”

  “Don’t you hate me?”

  “Why would I hate you?”

  The toos closed his eyes. “I am really quite confused.”

  He seemed to think for a moment. Suddenly, he leaned up and sniffed the air just in front of Ana. She stiffened, using more energy than she wanted to admit to avoid jumping back. Her brain teased her with images of the toos’ sharp teeth and drowning black eyes. I am not afraid of him, she told herself firmly. He’s done nothing to deserve my fear.

  “You are not a selkie,” the toos said, opening his eyes in surprise.

  “No.”

  “Ah, that explains it then.” He relaxed back onto the table, his eyes drifting shut again.

  Ana’s brain whirred a mile a minute. Why wasn’t the toos angry with Brec? Why did her not being a selkie explain everything? She looked up at Brec to find him watching her with a strange expression on his face.

  He opened his mouth as if he was about to say something, but then closed it. Sighing, he shook his head and turned his attention to the toos.

  “If it’s all right with you,” he said quietly. “I think we should move him to your spare room. He’d be more comfortable there.”

  Was that a peace offering? Ana shifted her weight to her other foot, not sure how to respond. Had she shamed him? Did he realize how wrong his actions had been or was he only doing this now to appease her? And why would he care about appeasing her?

  Thoroughly confused, And shook her head and stepped up to the table. “I’ll help you carry him.” She started to slide one hand beneath the toos’ back.

  “Ana, don’t!”

  Something sharp shredded through the flesh of her fingertips, tearing skin and sending a warm rush of blood down her hand. Pain ripped through her fingers as Ana screamed in surprise. Jerking her hand away from the toos’ back, she barely saw his eyes shoot open in time to jump back.

  Blood flew off her injured fingers as she jerked it to her body. Another scream ripped from her throat as the toos sat up on the table, his head turning and his fathomless black eyes locking onto her injured hand. Ana’s heart pounded. He braced his hands against the table, his muscles tensing as he prepared to leap . . .

  Chapter 14

  “No!”

  Brec leapt in front of Ana, putting himself between her and the toos. Mano stared at her like a man in the desert stares at a glass of water, desperate and nearly mad. The scent of blood tinged the air and Brec knew to the toos’ senses it was even stronger. Manos was likely drowning in the smell of Ana’s blood, the coppery liquid calling to him, driving him wild. After his brush with death, Manos had to be starving, his body urging him to eat and rebuild his strength. This situation had the potential to turn deadly in the blink of an eye.

  “I can taste her blood,” the toos whispered hoarsely. He licked his lips, catching a drop of Ana’s blood that had splattered on him when she jerked her hand back. He trembled on the table, his gaze never wavering from Ana’s injured fingers.

  “She was trying to help carry you,” Brec said calmly. The fact that the toos hadn’t leapt for Ana yet was encouraging. At least he was trying to fight it. “She didn’t know about your other mouth.”

  The toos still stared at her, his throat working as he swallowed. He didn’t hear Ana moving, was barely certain she was breathing. Brec had been in the water with a toos in shark form, had nearly missed losing his tail to one. He knew exactly what sort of primal fear was flooding Ana’s blood right now.

  Several minutes dragged by. The toos stared at her with an intensity that made Brec’s skin crawl, but he didn’t move. Any sudden movements on anyone’s part could snap the toos’ control. Just when Brec feared things would devolve into bloodshed, the toos dragged in a deep breath. Ever so slowly, he turned. Facing away from Ana, he swung his legs off the table. His new position bared his back to her and Brec heard a sharp intake of breath.

  He’d seen it before, but it was still a shocking sight to behold. A gaping jaw took up most of Mano’s back. Rows and rows of brilliant white, razor-sharp teeth glistened in the light over the kitchen table. Brec’s stomach rolled at the ruby-red stains of Ana’s blood coating several of the wicked points. How close had she been to putting her entire hand in that mouth? How close had she come to losing her hand?

  “Your skills may be the death of her,” Mano gasped. “I can taste her blood, and I’m feeling almost well enough to do something about it. And I’m . . . starving.” He shook his head, his shoulders tensing as if trying not to turn back to face Ana. “You’ve saved my life. Get her out of here before I make you regret it.”

  Brec grabbed Ana’s arm and dragged her away. The black gaze of the predator warned that there was little time to put some distance between them. If they had a prayer of keeping him anywhere near docile, he had to feed him soon. With a full belly, the toos would be more able to control his hunger and his innate tendency toward violence.

  Ana kept her gaze locked on the toos as Brec dragged her out of the dining room through the kitchen and into the living room. The mouth on his back opened and closed and Ana whimpered, a tiny sound of pure fear. Brec retrieved their coats from a closet by the door and she barely seemed to notice when he shoved her coat at her. He took advantage of her distraction
to jerk his skin free from its hiding place behind the couch.

  “What’s this for?” she murmured, her eyes still gazing in the direction of her kitchen.

  “I have to get him some food. He’ll only eat fresh meat, so I need to go to the water and get him some fish.”

  Ana frowned as she looked down at her coat. “Why am I coming? Shouldn’t I bandage this up?”

  A roll of gauze bounced off Brec’s shoulder and he barely caught it before it fell to the floor. They both looked up to see the toos standing in the doorway to the kitchen, his gaze locked on the blood flowing freely from Ana’s fingers.

  “Yes, bandage it up,” Mano said softly. “For what little good it will do you if you don’t get out now.”