Holding You: A Blackthorn Elite Spinoff Read online

  Copyright © 2020 by Beck & Hallman LLC

  Edited by Kelly Allenby

  Cover by C. Hallman

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Contents

  Holding Me

  Prologue

  1. Daisy

  2. Carter

  3. Daisy

  4. Carter

  5. Daisy

  6. Carter

  7. Daisy

  8. Carter

  9. Daisy

  10. Carter

  Epilogue

  What to read next

  About the Authors

  Hating You Preview

  Holding Me

  A Blackthorn Elite Spinoff

  Crazy Daisy is what they used to call her, beautiful but deranged. She was the prey to every bully in our school… including me.

  After graduating Blackthorn, I thought I’d never see her again, then she walked into the fundraiser my father was putting on and I couldn’t help but be drawn to her.

  I’d always wanted her, but never acted on my feelings.

  Now was the time to claim her, but there was something standing in our way… her father and a secret I never saw coming.

  Prologue

  Carter

  Four Years Prior

  I’ve only been at Blackthorn University for a few days, but I already have a flock of people surrounding me. Everyone wants to be my friend.

  The girls want to be in my bed, and the guys want to get on my good side. Or I should say, my father’s good side. That’s the downside of having a father who runs this city, literally… he is the mayor. It’s hard to distinguish who is your real friend, most of them are good at being fake.

  “What are you going to do tonight?” Carly asks, drawing me out of my thoughts. I’ve known her since middle school, her mom being my father’s assistant and all. That doesn’t mean she’s important to me or that she is any less fake than the rest of them.

  I shrug, “Some party, I guess.”

  Her eyes widen in shock at my answer, and for a moment, I don’t get why. I always go to parties, why is she so shocked about that? Then I realize she’s not looking at me at all. She’s looking past me, and at something off in the distance.

  “Oh, my god, is that Crazy Daisy?”

  As if my head is on a swivel, I look in the direction Carly is looking.

  We’re sitting outside in the courtyard, hundreds of people surround us, but my eyes find hers in a single heartbeat. The color always reminded me of the sky on a clear day, such a beautiful pale blue. I could get lost in her eyes.

  “Oh, god, what’s that weirdo doing here? I thought we’d finally gotten rid of her after high school,” Carly whines.

  “I guess not…” I trail off as I watch Daisy trying to navigate through the crowd like a newborn fawn on shaky legs. She’s always been like that, her thin limbs uncoordinated, her walk awkward and her whole demeanor just… well, weird.

  But the most unique feature about her has always been her eyes. Haunted, intriguing, and breathtakingly wild, almost feral.

  She pushes her black-rimmed glasses up her small pixie-like nose and turns away from me, breaking the spell I didn’t even know I was under.

  I could never figure her out, not in all the years I’ve known her, and I wonder if I’ll ever get the opportunity to do so, or if I lost that chance years ago.

  1

  Daisy

  Present

  Smoothing a hand down the front of my dress, I look in the mirror. I can barely recognize myself, the reflection not matching the image I’ve seen for the past twenty-two years of my life. The person before me is a put-together woman, with pretty features, perfectly styled hair, and professionally applied makeup. Gone are my glasses that were hiding most of my face because my dad wouldn’t let me wear contacts. Not until now, anyway.

  I only started wearing makeup and styling my hair a few months ago, my father never allowed it before. Of course, no amount of blush and mascara could have hidden the crazy person I was back then.

  As if it happened yesterday, I can still remember the exact moment when I realized what my father had been doing to me.

  For the better part of my life, my mind was hazy, always filled with an overabundance of thoughts that I was unable to make sense of. I’d hear things and think things I shouldn’t. I was paranoid and unhinged. I’d never felt like I was going to fit in, and eventually, it started to feel like I was on the other side of the glass looking in.

  That was my life until I graduated college. A few weeks after that, I started to feel different. I started to feel… sane. It was like a fog had been lifted after a lifetime of it being so thick, I could barely see my hand in front of my face.

  For some reason, it all clicked together in my mind. My vitamins. My dad had made me take a vitamin every morning since I was a little girl. I had never questioned it. Who would? Your parents are supposed to care for you and give you the best life. Never once did I have the slightest idea of what he was really giving me, or that he was drugging me.

  Drugging his own daughter.

  I still haven’t figured out why he was doing it, and I’m even less sure as to why he suddenly stopped. Not that I’m complaining. All I know is that I will never let it happen again.

  A loud knock at my door drags me from my thoughts.

  “Are you ready, sweetheart?” My father’s muffled voice filters through the closed door.

  “Yes, Daddy,” I call out to him as always, with the sweetest voice I can muster. It’s become increasingly harder and harder to play my part every day in this fucked up charade. I act as the obedient daughter even though I know what he has done. Even though all I want to do is run far, far away. But I can’t.

  Heading toward the door, I plaster a smile on my face and pull it open. My father is waiting on the other side, and I let my gaze drag over him. He’s wearing an expensive tuxedo, his hair is slicked back, he looks dashing.

  “Beautiful,” he murmurs as he looks me up and down, examining me like I’m a thing rather than a woman. “The limousine is waiting whenever you’re ready.”

  He turns, motioning me to follow him, but instead of falling into step beside him, I turn on my heels and speed walk down the hall toward the living room.

  “I’ll be right there, I’m just telling Mom goodbye,” I call after him.

  “Well, hurry, child,” he orders, and I automatically start walking faster. Having been conditioned to listen to my father’s every command, it’s a hard habit to break.

  Entering the large room, my eyes fall on my mother, who is sitting on the leather rocking chair near the window. It’s where she always sits.

  Facing the window, she looks outside, admiring the stars, maybe, but when I get closer, I can see the vacancy in her lifeless blue eyes. And I realize that she isn’t looking at anything at all. Her eyes, like always, are empty. No life, no joy or happiness.

  Kneeling in front of her, I take her slender hand into my own.

  “Hey, Momma. I’m leaving now, but I’ll be back in a few hours.” I talk to her like she is a child and not the other way around. She gets upset easily, and I don’t want her to have a breakdown because that would make it ten times harder than it already is for me to leave.

  “Okay,” she answers, not even looking at me.

  Her voice is flat, just like her eyes, which don’t hold a single drop of emotion. Sadness clings to me, a
long with anger that flows through my veins like molten lava.

  “I love you, Mommy,” I whisper even knowing she won’t say it back.

  She’s the only person I truly love, and the reason I’m still here and not a million miles away, hiding from my father. At the thought of leaving her here with my father, a shiver ripples down my spine.

  I can’t leave her here, and I can’t take her with me either. It’s a bad combination. She gets so upset, and so quickly, anything out of the ordinary or off routine will set her off. I wouldn’t be able to make it out the door without her having a toddler-size meltdown.

  As I suspected, she doesn’t answer and continues looking out the window and into the nothingness. Sighing, I move to stand and give her a fleeting kiss on the cheek. Sucking air into my lungs, I let the familiar scent of her lavender shampoo soothe me.

  It’s going to be okay… I say mostly to myself. I turn and walk out of the room, hoping that I can find a way to get us out from under my father’s thumb before it’s too late. Before he finds out my biggest secret of all.

  2

  Carter

  Slamming the door shut behind me, I sink into the leather seat of my town car. “Go,” I order the driver, who immediately puts the car into gear and pulls out on to the road. Usually, I’m not such an asshole with my staff, but the last twenty-four hours have been nothing but a nightmare, and unfortunately, they’ve been at the receiving end of my bad mood.

  The tux I’m wearing feels too tight like it’s suffocating me, and all I did was think about her. Lorie, my ex-girlfriend as of yesterday, the woman I thought I was going to marry and have kids with.

  Yesterday was the day she decided, that apparently, we don’t have a future together. She said we don’t want the same things.

  It came out of the blue, baffled me, blindsided me even. I didn’t see it coming, and maybe that’s why I’m so fucking mad about it. I don’t like surprises, and I don’t like someone messing up my plans.

  Part of me wants to say it wouldn’t have been so bad had I seen it coming, but it wouldn’t have changed the outcome. She didn’t want me, and there was nothing I could do to change that.

  I try to focus on the passing trees outside my window, but I can’t stop my mind from thinking about her, about how she just left. The truth is, we never had the perfect relationship, no fairytale love story. We just worked, made sense, and the sex was amazing. That was good enough for me, but obviously not her.

  When we pull up to the hotel a few minutes later, I tell my driver to take the rest of the night off. “I’ve got a room booked for after the gala. I’ll call you in the morning when I’m ready to be picked up.”

  He nods, and I get out, watching the car pull away before I turn and walk into the banquet hall of the Four Seasons.

  If it wasn’t for my father asking me to come, I wouldn’t even be here, but it’s hard to say no to a man who’s done so much for me and those around him. However, that doesn’t mean I’ll be staying all night. I’ll show my face, have a few drinks, socialize a little, and then I’ll go up to my room and drink until I pass out.

  Pushing through the already crowded space, I’m greeted by many familiar faces. It takes way too much effort for me not to push them out of the way, so I can get to the bar, but somehow, by the grace of God, I manage. I smile, make small talk, and blow smoke up rich peoples’ asses, so they donate more money to my father’s charity. It’s what I’m good at, and what I’ll always do.

  “Champagne?” A waiter offers as he stops beside me, holding a tray full of sparkling flutes. Taking one of the thin glasses in my fingers, I give him a slight nod. It’s not the whiskey I was hoping for, but this will do for now.

  Downing the whole thing in one swallow, I listen to the chief of police talk about his son, who also attended Blackthorn. He’s an alumnus now, and apparently, married to some girl. When I can’t take the small talk any longer, I cut him off, politely, of course.

  “Please, excuse me. I just spotted someone I need to have a word with,” I lie, pretending to be looking at someone behind him.

  “Of course, we’ll catch up later. Tell your father I said hi, and that I’m sorry he couldn’t make it. Hopefully, he feels better soon.”

  “Sure thing, and give Cameron and his new wife my congratulations,” I smile before turning around and heading toward the bar.

  With my eyes trained on the whiskey sitting on the top shelf, I weave through the crowd. I’m so close to the bar, I can almost taste the amber liquid on my tongue. Picking up speed, I ignore my surroundings and focus on getting to the bar. Then like a damn apparition, a woman appears in front of me. With her back turned to me, she doesn’t even see me coming.

  Fuck. Unable to come to a stop quick enough, I run directly into her, causing her to fall forward with a gasp. Out of instinct, and because I’m not a complete asshole, I circle her waist with an arm and pull her back into my chest to keep her from landing flat on her face.

  I can’t help but notice how perfect her body fits against mine. Like a missing puzzle piece. She’s not short, but compared to my height and stature, she might as well be. The fact that I basically bulldozed her to the ground sparks my alpha tendencies.

  Tiny, small, and clearly not with a man.

  “Shit, I’m so sorry. I didn’t see you there. Are you okay?”

  Twisting in my hold, the dark-haired beauty turns to look up at me. “It’s okay. I’m—” She stops mid-sentence, and I try not to gawk at the swell of her creamy smooth breasts, which are artfully pushed up by her dress. Gorgeous. Perfect. Forcing myself to look away, I move my eyes up her throat and stop on her face.

  My mouth pops open as recognition sets in.

  Holy shit. It’s… no way.

  Daisy?

  For a moment, I think my eyes are playing tricks on me. This can’t be her? She looks so different. Her glasses are gone, as are her braces. Her hair, her clothes, and even her face, it’s all so... different, normal, and though she is staring at me in shock, there is a calmness in her eyes that was never there before. Heat fills my chest as I peer down at her, my eyes lingering on her lips, the only thing I can think to do is kiss her. Kiss those pink lips until they’re swollen.

  “Daisy…” I say her name out loud this time, half expecting her to tell me I’ve got the wrong person, but she just gives me a slight nod, confirming it is, in fact, her. A blush appears on her cheeks, and she seems embarrassed. The warmth in my chest moves outward through my limbs, and it feels like I’ve stuck my finger in a light socket. Opening her mouth to say something, she’s interrupted before she can even get a word out.

  “Carter Davis?” A man I recognize quickly as Daisy’s father greets me. He’s a lawyer, or he used to be one. My father never liked him or his ways of so-called justice. Only when Daisy shoves at my hands, do I realize that I’ve been holding on to her hips this whole time.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t see your daughter standing there,” I apologize, faking yet another smile.

  “Oh, don’t worry about that,” he waves me off, and nudges me in the side, “women are always in the way, am I right?”

  I’m sure it’s meant to be a joke, but anyone from a mile away can see that it isn’t.

  George’s features turn serious in an instant, “Daisy, apologize to him for being in the way.” It isn’t a suggestion, but an order, and I don’t like it one bit. What the fuck?

  At first, all I can think is what the fuck, but then I find I’m gritting my teeth in anger.

  “I’m sorry,” she says right away like an obedient child. Her gaze is cast to the floor, and all I want to do is slug her father in his smug face for being such an asshole. Who treats their daughter like that?

  “There now, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Her father grunts as he grabs her by the arm, tugging her closer to him. “It was nice to see you, Carter, tell your father I said hi.”

  He dismisses me, and they walk away together, or more like he drags Daisy b
eside him. All I can do is stand there, staring in shock at the events that just took place right before my eyes. Daisy is here, and she’s normal, different… and her father is a fucking dick.

  Something in my gut churns, but I don’t understand the emotions I’m feeling. Ignoring my swirling thoughts, I go back to what I was doing before Daisy came crashing back into my life. I walk up to the bar and order a whiskey.

  The bartender gets my drink quickly, and I damn near sag against the bar when I take the first sip. Fuck. I feel like an addict trying to drown himself. Needing the amber liquid more than ever, I down the glass, and have the bartender pour me another.

  Feeling a little more composed, I suck in a deep breath and turn around to survey the room. Even across the expanse of the room, our eyes find one another, fear trickles into her blue eyes, and deep down, I know I can’t ignore her.

  Something is going on with her, and I’m going to figure it out. I’ve been a coward my whole life by not standing up for her when I should have. I can’t turn my back on her again. I just can’t. I have to do something.

  3

  Daisy

  He’s staring. I can feel it. Feel his eyes burning into my skin like heat rays. Looking up, our gazes collide. It’s like a cosmic event occurs inside my head. My stomach twists while my heart starts to beat out of my chest. I’ve never felt this way before, never felt so excited that it makes me sick to my stomach. I drop my gaze and do my best to hide my interest in Carter.