Girlology: A Girl's Guide to Stuff that Matters Read online

  Cycle day 1. The first day you have menstrual bleeding is always considered day 1. It’s usually anywhere from 25 to 35 days after your last period. Everyone always seems to think that period cycles are always 28 days or one month . . . but everyone is a little different, and cycles can be longer or shorter (anywhere from 21 to 45 days) and still be normal.

  Cycle days 1–7. Periods usually last anywhere from three to seven days, but you only lose about two tablespoons of actual blood in all that time. It seems like more doesn’t it? That’s because of the other fluids and tissue that are released (think of them as the pillow cases and bedspread that need to be cleaned, too). Your bleeding is happening because there is no pregnancy, and the uterus has decided to release the old lining and begin a new lining (change the sheets!).

  Your uterus pushes out the period (old sheets) by contracting its muscular walls. Some girls will feel these contractions as cramps.

  Cycle days 7–12. At the same time that you are having your period, your brain and ovaries are already talking. Your brain is recruiting another egg for the next cycle, and your uterus is getting orders to prepare a fresh lining. Your hormones are helping with all this communication. The follicle (which holds the recruited egg) in your ovary is making that hormone called estrogen that helps thicken the lining of the uterus. So as soon as your bleeding is done, your uterus is already “fluffing up the sheets,” or getting a new lining ready for the next cycle in case an embryo is on the way. Now for this whole thing about babies. Your body needs a lot of practice with its cycles before it’s really ready for a baby. That’s why you start your periods way before you are ready to actually have sex and get pregnant.

  Cycle days 12–14. Ovulation time. Now that the next egg has been recruited, it is ready for take off. The follicle that it has been growing in will open up and let it go! This is called ovulation. Some girls actually feel a slight twinge or cramp when this happens. If there is discomfort, it’s called mittelschmerz (dare you to use that in your next English paper!!). That’s a German word that means “middle pain.” Most girls are clueless that such an amazing thing is happening in there.

  This is the time when you may also notice that your vaginal discharge seems a little more watery or slimey. This happens because your hormones tell your cervix to change the discharge to make it easier for sperm to pass through. The cervix says okay, and makes the discharge extra slippery. Pregnancy can happen during about eight days every cycle. The six or seven days before and two or three days after ovulation are the days that pregnancy is most likely to happen if you are having sex. Because ovulation is unpredictable and young girls’ cycles are not always the same every month, it is really hard to figure out exactly when pregnancy can or can’t happen.

  Cycle days 15–18. Ovulation has usually happened by now, and the egg is still traveling down the tube. If it has already hooked up with a sperm, an embryo is forming (we’ll talk about that more in chapters 6 and 7). Most likely, it’s alone and enjoying the massage as it is swished down the fallopian tube into the uterus. Once the egg arrives in the uterus, it hangs out for a couple days before it’s time to go.

  Cycle days 18–28 or so. This is a time for rest in the endometrium. The follicle that had released the egg is now making a new hormone called progesterone. Progesterone will make the fluid in the cervix thicken and will get the lining in tip-top shape in case an embryo arrives. If there is no pregnancy in the uterus, the amount of progesterone falls and the endometrium can’t live without it, so it leaves the uterus as a period, which brings you back to day 1. As the progesterone levels are changing, some girls get moody or might feel more hungry than usual. Acne can worsen during this time. Some girls even feel a little puffy or bloated. That’s why you might hear girls complaining when they’re about to get their periods. All these symptoms are common and go away as soon as a period starts. Rarely, these symptoms are so bad that they affect your friendships and relationships at home. If that happens with you, please talk with your doctor because there are things that can help.

  What if My Periods Are Not Regular?

  Let’s back up a little. After your very first period (it’s called menarche, which sounds like anarchy and is pronounced MEN ar kee), you might have another period a month later, or it might not come again for several months.

  After your first few periods, you should expect your periods to occur anywhere from 21 to 45 days apart. It might be 28 days one month, 40 days the next, 32 days the next. That’s all normal at first. A period doesn’t always come at the same exact time every month (remember months aren’t all the same length, either), but it should start to show a predictable pattern within a few years after you start.

  If fact, the age you are at menarche can predict how soon your periods will start happening in a regular pattern.

  Age at Menarche Years until Very Predictable Periods

  Under 11 1 to 2 years

  11 to 12 Up to 2 or 3 years

  Over 12 Up to 4 or 5 years

  Periods will become “very” predictable once you start ovulating regularly. It’s not as reliable as the TV schedule or even as the trash pickup days, but it’s as reliable as they can get—that means within two to three days of the predicted time. Remember, to ovulate means to release an egg from your ovary. Once you start to ovulate with every cycle, then your periods become predictable. Your period will always start about 14 to 16 days after you ovulate. Problem is, you don’t always know when to expect ovulation. Like we said before, most girls have no clue when they ovulate because they usually don’t feel it. But if your periods are happening about the same number of days apart every time, you can know that you are probably ovulating. Miraculous!

  So far we’ve been talking about regular ovulation, which means you are ovulating pretty much every month. But did you know you can ovulate before you even get your first period? After that, some of your cycles will include ovulation and some won’t. That means pregnancy can happen before a girl even has her first period if she is having sex.

  Menstrual Calendar

  Keep up with your periods by using the boxes below whenever you have bleeding. Copy it or make a chart like it to keep track of your bleeding—the heavier your bleeding is, the darker you fill in the box. Very light days (some people call this “spotting”) can be shown with just a dot in the box for that date. If you develop any irregular bleeding, this chart or one like it will be very helpful to your doctor. Besides, it will also help you recognize the pattern of your periods and help you predict when you will have your next one.

  Predicting Your Periods

  By keeping track of your periods on a calendar, you can usually tell when you should expect your next period. To calculate your cycle length, look at the past few periods on your calendar. Starting with the first day of a period, count the number of days until the first day of the next period. Do this for two or three cycles.

  Most cycles will be between 21 and 45 days long. If your cycle length is about the same (within three to five days of each other) for several cycles, you can then start predicting your next periods pretty accurately.

  If your periods are completely irregular, check the table on to see if it is time for you to be ovulating regularly yet. If it is, and you are still having unpredictable periods, talk with your doctor. Also, if your periods are skipping more than two months at a time, you should talk with your doctor. Some girls and women never ovulate regularly and may need medication to make their periods predictable.

  How Much Bleeding Is Normal?

  Most periods have only a couple tablespoons to about one-half cup of blood and fluid . . . and it’s mostly fluid and tissue, not blood. That’s why it doesn’t always look like real blood, but instead looks kind of brown or dark maroon, even blackish. Our bodies can make up for that amount of blood loss in no time, so we do not become anemic (have a low blood count).

  As we’ve mentioned, most periods last anywhere from three to seven days. It is normal to have heavier blood flow
in the first one or two days, then it gets lighter toward the end. The number of pads or tampons that are normal to use will depend on how soaked you let them become and what types you are using.

  Clots are dark clumps of blood that are the consistency of liver or old Jello-O. Clots happen when blood stays in one place for a while, like in your vagina. You are most likely to see clots in the morning from the menstrual blood that has been in your vagina while you were lying down. When you get up, you might pass small clots. If you use a tampon, you might also see clots hanging on to the end of it when you take it out. These are normal, but if you have a lot of larger clots, that could signal heavier-than-normal bleeding.

  Cramps!

  Some girls will have cramping in their lower abdomen or pelvis before or during their periods. Sometimes the pain is even in the vulva, upper thighs or lower back. Most older teens and women will have at least some mild discomfort with their periods. About 10 percent (one in ten, right?) will have severe cramps that make them stop doing activities they would normally do.

  Menstrual cramping happens because the uterus (made of muscle tissue) squeezes to release the tissue and blood that make up your period. The squeezing is caused by that hormone (progesterone) and some other chemicals (called prostaglandins) that are released after ovulation.

  If you feel bloated (full or puffy in your lower belly) or crampy with your periods, there are some things you can do to feel better:

  • Exercise, such as walking, jogging, swimming, bicycling, stretching or yoga. These things really do help cramps . . . we’re not kidding!

  • Take essential fatty acids (especially omega-3) supplements like flaxseed oil, evening primrose oil or fish oil tablets.

  • Avoid red meat and fried, fatty or greasy food (they have saturated fats, which can actually increase cramping).

  • Try medications, such as ibuprofen 400 to 600 milligrams every six to eight hours or naproxen 440 milligrams every twelve hours. These may sound like big names you’ve never heard, but there are brand names that you are probably more familiar with. You’ll have to look at medication labels to see what is really in them. These doses are a little higher than the instructions on the bottle advise, but they are closer to prescription doses often used for menstrual cramps. It’s safe to use these doses for a couple of days. These medications block the prostaglandins that cause cramps and usually work better than some products that say they are for menstrual cramps, including aspirin or acetominophen. Aspirin products usually do little for cramps and may make bleeding heavier. Some medicines for cramps even contain caffeine. Caffeine does nothing for menstrual cramps and might make breast tenderness worse. Read the labels on medications you can buy without a prescription to find out exactly what is in them! Check with a parent before you take any type of medication.

  • A heating pad or a warm bath always feels nice.

  If you have tried the things above and still have cramps that stop you from doing things or make you miss school, you should talk with your doctor. There are prescription medications and hormones that can treat even the most severe cramps. There are also some medical conditions that can cause bad cramps. Your doctor can discuss these with you and make sure you are okay.

  Period Supplies

  When you have your period, you obviously need to use pads or tampons (affectionately known, in totally unhip terms, as feminine hygiene products) to keep the blood off your clothes. There are tons of different brands in tons of different shapes and sizes. After a few periods, you’ll know what works best for you.

  Whether you use pads or tampons, you should change them at least every four to six hours and may need to change them more frequently if your menstrual flow is heavy. If you aren’t familiar with them, here are some of the products out there. If you know all this . . . feel free to skip it and move on!

  Pads

  Pads are made with an adhesive that attaches to the crotch of your underwear. Just unwrap the pad, pull off the strip that covers the adhesive and put the pad in your underwear (sticky side against your underwear, not YOU! Ouch!). Adjust the pad into place as you pull your underwear up. There are different types of pads to choose from, including:

  Pantyliner. This is a really thin pad that works for very light flow. Some girls like to use a pantyliner when they are also using a tampon, just in case they overflow the tampon. Some girls also like to use these for the vaginal discharge they have between periods.

  Minipad. A little thicker than the pantyliner, this is for light to normal flow.

  Maxipad. This one can feel pretty thick. Some girls say it feels like a diaper! It’s good for heavy flow days or at night because it can absorb a lot.

  “Wings.” Pads with “wings” have flaps on the sides that you wrap around the crotch of your underwear. Sometimes a lot of running or activity will make your pad bunch up in the middle so that your menstrual flow goes over the edge and stains your underwear. The wings can help prevent that.

  Sanitary napkins. Another term for menstrual pads, it usually refers to maxis.

  Reusable pads. Some girls and women choose to use cotton pads that they can wash and reuse. They are probably better for the environment because you are not using disposable products. You can find them at health food stores.

  Tampons

  Tampons are little padlike things that actually go inside your vagina to absorb the menstrual flow as it comes out of the cervix. Sounds painful, but really, if you put it in right, you won’t even feel it!

  You put tampons in with an applicator that helps you insert the tampon into the vagina. There is also a brand that doesn’t have an applicator, so you just put it in with your finger. The box they come in will have directions—look at the pictures they provide, and it will help. Just like pads, tampons come in a variety of sizes. For your first time, it definitely helps to use the slender or “light” size tampons. Sometimes it helps to put your finger in your vagina first to see what direction you need to “aim” the tampon. All tampons have a string on them so you can just pull the string to take the tampon out when it is time to change it. Don’t worry, the strings don’t break!!!! Even if they did, the vagina is a “dead end,” so a tampon cannot get lost inside you and end up coming out of your nose! (Whew!)

  Tampons are nice because you can swim and do other activities with them and not have to worry about having a bulky pad on. Can you imagine trying to wear a pad in a bathing suit and then getting it wet in the pool?

  It is safe to use tampons even with your first period. Some girls, though, feel more comfortable trying their first tampon after they are a little more used to having periods. When you decide to use a tampon for the first time, make sure you are on your period with a pretty normal to heavy flow. This is because the tampon comes out a lot easier when it is soaked. If it is dry, it feels like you are tugging on the walls of the vagina . . . ouch! There is no reason to “practice” using a tampon before you are on your period. It will work, but it takes a little getting used to.

  If your mom doesn’t want you to use a tampon, you should ask why. Tampons have only been around for a couple of generations, so a lot of women your mom’s age or grandmother’s age were told they couldn’t use tampons until they were married. This means they couldn’t use tampons until after they had sex. Tampons won’t break your hymen, injure your vagina or tarnish your reputation as a nice girl. Even the super-plus size tampons are a lot smaller than an erect penis! And since you put a tampon in yourself, you will know how much pressure you can apply to get it in without hurting yourself.

  Another reason some people are scared of using tampons is a problem called toxic shock syndrome (TSS). TSS became well known when it started happening among women who used one particular brand of tampons that is no longer made. Toxic shock syndrome is a severe infection with a particular type of bacteria, and it is only rarely associated with tampon use. (It’s actually more common with surgery or skin infections.) Recently, it has occurred a little more frequently because of s
uper absorbent brands. If you use one of these make sure you remove it within four-six hours. So the bottom line is that tampons are safe to use if used properly.

  How do you use them properly? Well, if you are using tampons, just as with pads, you’ll need to change them regularly. If your flow is heavy, you’ll know to change your tampon when you feel it starting to leak. If your flow is light, use a light or thin tampon, and don’t wear it longer than six hours. If you forget to take one out and leave it in for several days, you’ll remember when you start to notice a horrible odor or start having spotting that has a bad odor. An old, bloody tampon that sits in a vagina for several days will cause just that. Yuck! Hold your nose, take it out and wrap it up in something that will contain the smell! It happens. Just let it be a lesson: What goes in, must come out!

  PMS?

  Some teens and women notice changes in the way they feel before their period. Symptoms can start anywhere in the one to two weeks before your period starts. They might include emotional things like crying easily, being moody or grumpy, or wanting to be alone. They can also be physical things like breast soreness, cramping, feeling puffy or craving certain foods.

  When these types of feelings affect the things you do or your relationships with your friends or family, it’s called PMS (it stands for premenstrual syndrome)—it’s a real medical diagnosis, not an excuse. Sometimes people want to blame anger or emotions on PMS, but it may just be real anger or real emotions. There’s a little good news since PMS won’t happen at all unless you are ovulating regularly (remember that can take several years after you start!).