Opulent Obsession: A Dark Secret Society Romance Read online

  So even if she wanted me to choose her. Even if she expected me to choose her…

  The answer was no.

  I moved to the next belle who wore a lovely yellow dress. Yes, the girl in yellow would have to do.

  Looking down to the string of white pearls resting against her freckled flesh, I yanked hard. The necklace broke from her neck and the tiny pearls scattered around the floor. Her eyes widened, tears formed, and her lips trembled, but she remained in place.

  Breaking the necklace. An act to show just how easy it is for The Order of the Silver Ghost to give you riches only to take them away. What you believe to be yours can be ruined with such ease. We had recited this motto over and over as boys. I knew exactly how easy it was for the Order to control everything we did. They could destroy me. They could destroy my father. They could destroy Fallon. And I wasn’t about to let that happen.

  Not wasting any time and trying to not feel the glare of Fallon beside me, I replaced the pearls that had been on the yellow-dressed belle’s neck with the black ribbon. I needed Fallon and the rest of the belles to leave immediately, and the faster I tied the ribbon around the now shaking belle, the better.

  “Rafe Jackson, have you chosen your belle for the Initiation?”

  I took a step back from the belle in yellow and glanced at Fallon, who looked at me as if I had just stabbed a dagger through her heart.

  I’m sorry, Fallon. So sorry.

  But no way am I going to allow you to be a belle to be broken.

  “I have chosen,” I stated firmly. “I have chosen my belle.”

  4

  Fallon

  What the fuck had just happened?

  Mrs. Hawthorne told me that if I accepted the invitation, I’d be a shoo-in. After we’d gone for our walk, and she’d finally told me everything—and I mean everything, at least everything she knew—she brought up the craziest idea of all. She’d given me the invitation to be a belle myself.

  She said it was perfect. That I could be a belle, and unlike my mother, I’d be chosen. That Rafe would pick me and I could finally have all the desires of my heart—all that I frankly deserved. It was the perfect solution. I’d be able to take care of Mom. I’d get what had always been due me, what had been stolen from her so long ago.

  But Rafe had ruined everything.

  He’d gone and fucking humiliated me. Again, rejecting me. And this time not just in a little written note telling me he was sorry that I had such strong feelings for him, but sorry he didn’t feel the same way. Oh God, that note. Cause he hadn’t stopped there. No, he’d gone on and said he didn’t think even being long-distance friends was such a good idea anymore because he felt bad leading me on, but thanks for the ride and here’s a $100 for the road.

  His brother had just died, and I’d tried giving him the benefit of the doubt. He’d never been so cold to me in the entirety of our over-a-decade-long friendship, and he’d certainly never just outright given me money like that.

  It had made me feel... cheap. Like he was distilling our friendship down to a transaction. I’m tired of you, please go away, here’s a hundred bucks if that will make it happen faster.

  But I’d been stubborn. I wasn’t going to give up on ten years of being best friends, especially when I thought he might need me—Timothy had just died for Christ’s sake. If it had been my sibling, all I would have wanted was to bury my cheek against his broad, comforting chest.

  However, when I went by, his mother answered the door and said he didn’t want to see me. He’d asked her to be his gatekeeper after the note so that he didn’t even have to deal with me.

  And then everything moved so quickly. I was accepted into the prestigious Art Center College of Design in Pasadena, California. I had to go. My scholarship at Darlington had dried up. My mysterious benefactor fueling my Darlington Scholarship had decided to stop paying my way.

  I had no choice but to go.

  I suppose it wasn’t true. I could have stayed and finished out my education in the shit public school system. I would have, if there’d been even a whisper or whimper of encouragement from Rafe.

  But all I got was the cold stone of his walkway and the silence of the door being shut repeatedly in my face by his mother. His email went unchecked. No word. No communication.

  Thirteen years of friendship and—well, I’d hoped for more. But then I’d always been a fool for imagining there could be anything between us, him the prince and me, the help’s daughter—and then he’d just cut me from his life as easily as the trash my mother threw out each week.

  And so, ten days later, I’d boarded a bus, and never came home.

  Until now.

  For what? For this? Only to make myself as beautiful and appealing as a slutty cupcake, give him my soul through my eyes, and be rejected as thoroughly and painfully as when we were stupid kids?

  Fuck Mrs. Hawthorne for ever helping to get my hopes up. I couldn’t believe I even came here to the Oleander. I couldn’t believe I was repeating my mother’s fate.

  I was a rejected belle now, too. I guess I could join their little club.

  I was shocked when Mama H told me. Was it really only yesterday that she blew my world wide open? Just yesterday when I followed her from the cafe to the little picturesque park by the river where she told me a tale I’ll never forget?

  “Your mother was young and desperate when she got to this town,” Mama H said as she sat down on a park bench along an empty path. It was 11am on a Friday and no one was around. Swallowing hard, I sat down beside her. Did I want to hear what she had to say? Even then I knew that whatever Mama H was about to tell me, it was big. Maybe even rock-my-foundation big.

  She didn’t disappoint. “She always reminded me a lot of myself. She worked as a washerwoman at one of the motels in a nearby town when she got the invitation.”

  “Invitation?”

  “To compete as a belle for the attention of one of the Initiates in the Order of the Silver Ghost.”

  My head snapped to look at her. She wasn’t looking at me. She still stared straight ahead. Even though her demeanor was calm, I knew better. She was spilling secrets that were sacred. Secrets that powerful men would go to extreme lengths to be kept quiet.

  “Why are you telling me this?”

  Finally, Mama H looked my way. Her eyes were direct. She was unafraid. “You deserve to know. It’s your heritage.”

  I’d felt my brow furrow. What the hell did that mean?

  But she was already barreling on. “The Invitation could have meant everything to your mother. A new life. Riches beyond anything she’d ever known. All her dreams come true.”

  I shook my head, confused. We both knew that wasn’t what happened.

  Mama H’s face softened. “She wasn’t chosen that night.”

  I felt her words like a physical blow. Not because I cared that much, but because I could imagine the blow my mother had felt. All her hopes for a better future, snatched away simply because a man hadn’t chosen her.

  So, if she hadn’t been chosen, why the hell was Mama H even telling me this story?

  “She was among the rejects,” Mama H went on.

  Well, that felt like a harsh way to put it, sheesh, but then she continued, “—just like I was.”

  My mouth dropped open just like when she’d first said it minutes before. I could barely voice the next words, “I don’t understand. I can’t imagine you as—”

  She laughed heartily. “I wasn’t always the woman you see before you. In my youth, I was quite the looker.”

  I frowned. I’d always thought Mama H beautiful, but in the motherly, comforting way of rounded, soft older woman. I tried to peer through that and reverse the years, and yes, just there, I could see it, the winking, mischievous young woman, hungry for life and adventure.

  “What—” I stopped myself right before I asked, What happened? That seemed rude and offensive to ask, even though it was what I really wanted to know.

  Mama H looked
back out across the river. “I was barely of age when I made my way to this country. My father brought me over on a business trip. Of course he did.”

  Her face went dark. “I was his favorite daughter to rape every night, so naturally he couldn’t leave me behind for even a day.”

  I blanched. “Mama H—” I reached out a hand and she caught it by my wrist, then settled it gently back on my own lap.

  “I’ve dealt with that evil man, lass, don’t you worry. He doesn’t walk this earth anymore.”

  Now my eyes were as wide as my open mouth. I snapped it shut. Holy shit. Mama H had secret depths I never could have guessed.

  And she was just laying them all bare to me for some reason, because she went on.

  “I ran away from him and disappeared as best I knew. It was a little easier to do back then. No cell phones or GPS trackers and all that nonsense. I rode a bus south and then got off at a random stop and walked down the most deserted road I could. Eventually I found my way up a long, winding drive with beautiful oak trees lining both sides, to the most beautiful mansion I’d ever seen. It was something out of a storybook.”

  Even now, all these years later, her voice took on a wistful quality as she spoke. “I’d lived in the city my whole life. A dirty part of Glasgow, and Glasgow’s already ranked the dirtiest city in all of Scotland. But here everything was so pristine and beautiful and smelled of pines and fresh air.” She closed her eyes and inhaled, a peaceful smile overcoming her face.

  “When I knocked on the door, they asked if I was one of the belles. I’d gotten there just in time for an Initiate’s ball. The harried woman just let me in without even asking to see my invitation.” Mama H shook her head. “It was an unorganized chaos with the belles back then. It’s a wonder they got anything accomplished.”

  I smiled even as I wanted to push her to hurry up the story. What happened next? How did she meet my mom? But if there was one thing I’d learned in all my time with Mama H, it was that you never rushed her.

  Still, I couldn’t help asking. “So, what’d you do?” I’d only heard whispered tidbits about the “belles” and what supposedly happened during these “Initiations”. Rafe used to speculate about the stuff his brother would have to do one day when he went through the Trials, but it was always this esoteric, far-away thing. Like the formalities or activities of a royal family, it was so far away from our lives.

  A wicked glint came into Mama H’s eyes. “I took advantage of the disarray. I found a spare dress and made myself up like one of the belles.”

  Well, she’d managed to shock me again. My mouth dropped open once more. “You pretended to be one?”

  She shrugged haughtily. “After asking around, I realized they were all women like me. We all had sad stories, and I’d stumbled upon a real-life fairytale. I could be Cinderella if I got the prince to kiss me by the end of the ball.”

  My heart sank.

  She said it so I didn’t have to: “Not that that happened. Silly for me to think it would, even for a moment.” She laughed, but it was one of those slightly hurt laughs, like it still stung, even after all these years.

  I wanted to reach out to her again, but considering how she’d rejected my touch last time, I didn’t try again. Experience had taught me that while Mama H had infinite comfort to give, she still rarely allowed you to reciprocate. She was an iron pillar, and the fact that she showed me such vulnerability in this moment… it was special. It meant she’d let me in further than she did most people.

  “No, I was not chosen that night. Another beautiful, less broken woman without shadows in her eyes was picked.”

  God, I wanted to hug her. If she would have allowed it, I would have.

  “But”—she brightened, looking back at me—“it was what was meant to be.” Her eyes were bright. “Because I wasn’t chosen, I became what I am today.”

  What was that, exactly? I wondered.

  “I’ve been able to take care of you girls all these years. I’ve been able to take care of the men of the Order. At first I saw to their”—she rolled her eyes—“carnal needs. Men are so easy. I worked the parties that year and eventually just started staying on and taking on more and more responsibilities until I ran the household. Eventually they caught on about who was in charge.”

  She winked at me, and I laughed out loud.

  And then I just blinked. By “working the parties,” she meant… I connected it with my other limited knowledge of what Rafe had told me over the years… Orgies. She meant she participated in the orgies and sex games the Order organized as part of each Initiation. Mama H and… orgies.

  Okay. I blinked. It might take me a minute to connect these two disparate thoughts and realities.

  “So, when your mother was rejected, I showed her the ropes of how to play the parties, too.”

  Wait, WHAT?

  “What?” I screeched, jumping up from the bench. “Mom worked the sex parties for those old, saggy-balled bastards? As in like a prostitute?”

  “Of course not!” Mama H said, sounding offended. “Your mother and I were never prostitutes.”

  My mouth gaped open. “Then… why…”

  Mama H got to her feet and she had a good two inches on me. She stared me down. “I’d hoped you were grown up enough to discuss this, but maybe I was wrong.”

  She started to walk away. Shit.

  “No. No!” I ran to catch up with her and put my hand on her arm. At least she didn’t yank away from me. Thank God for small favors.

  “No. Mama H, no! I just… This is a lot to process, okay?”

  She breathed out, her ruffled feathers calming. She nodded. “All right. Do you want to hear the rest of the story or not?”

  Hurriedly, I nodded my head. “Yes. No judgment, I swear. I just want to know what happened to my mother.”

  Mama H’s face clouded over again. She held out her arm to me and I took it. She led us down the little path down closer to the riverbank. “Your mother was never meant for the Oleander lifestyle, not long-term. She enjoyed the Oleander for what it was, but she knew those parties were fantasy. She was always more interested in getting on with her real life. But it was hard to find work. She did what she could, and then on the weekends came and got lost in the most opulent pleasures.”

  “God, Mama H, enough with the details. This is my mom!”

  Mama H tut-tutted. “Your generation is supposed to be all about sexual liberation.”

  I just squeezed my eyes shut. “Not when it comes to our parents.”

  She laughed. “Anyway. Then you came along, and your mom decided it was time to get serious. I helped her get the job at Rafe’s family’s house and that was that.”

  A horrible thought struck me, and I grabbed her arm. “Oh God.” I was about to be sick. Pieces started to click into place. “You’re saying Mom was having sex at the Oleander. And Rafe’s dad was there, and then Mom got pregnant with me—”

  But Mama H immediately shook her head vigorously no.

  “No, your mother never slept with Rafe’s father. Ever. I swear to you, as your mother swore to me.”

  The panic was still alive in my chest though. “How can you be sure?”

  Mama H just gave me the look. “Your mother’s not an idiot. She knew you were interested in Rafe as a teenager. I asked her the same question, but she said it was completely impossible. She never slept with Rafe’s father even once. In fact, he was the Initiate who rejected her as his belle. If anything else, his guilt at rejecting her, then someone else knocking her up was part of why he was so eager to give her a job. He’d given some other woman all her dreams and left your mother… well… as she was.”

  I froze. “So, wait… are you saying one of the other Order members is… my father?” I wasn’t hesitant about grabbing Mama H this time. I grabbed both of her arms and demanded, “Who? Who is my father?”

  “I don’t know!” she said. “I swear I don’t know which one of them it is!”

  I let go of her a
nd stumbled backwards. This couldn’t all be real. I was dreaming. No way Mama H had just confessed that she and my mother were rejected belles who’d then spent the next three months fucking various dudes in wild sex parties—oh and during one of those aforementioned gangbangs, some other rich, multi-millionaire fucker had knocked up Mom with me.

  And then left us. No money. No support. Nothing. Whoever it was had left my mother defenseless; a single mother in an unforgiving world.

  Unexpected rage burned through my belly at the realization.

  Mom and I had never lived in anything better than a one-bedroom apartment on the bad side of town. Shitty landlords, mice, ants, cockroaches, broken pipes, a toilet that either wouldn’t flush or would overflow, no hot water in winter, the list went on and on and on and on—

  Meanwhile my baby daddy had lived just miles away in some other mansion, his wife and kids—holy shit—did I have half-siblings?—living in the lap of luxury. Meanwhile Mom fought her entire life to make ends meet.

  Another thought struck. “My scholarship to Darlington Prep. Was that real or was that him?” Had some anonymous father secretly cared about my education?

  Mama H’s face dropped to the ground, and she slowly shook her head. “No. No honey, it wasn’t your father.”

  I felt like both raging and crying at the same time. My hands fisted as I fought back emotion. “Why? Why are you telling me all this now?” Frankly I might have preferred to go on in ignorance.

  Her countenance brightened and that was when she pulled out an envelope, gold letters embossed on it, my name on the invitation. “Because we finally have the chance to fix it. To repair all of the past’s mistakes. Rafe is the Initiate. He’ll choose you for sure. Finally, you can go through the Trials and get everything that was always denied to your mother. You’ll be the one they never saw coming and you can finally claim your birthright.”

  “But he—” I started but she cut me off.

  “It’s Rafe. He’ll get his head out of this ass long enough to see the amazing woman in front of him when he sees you there. Don’t worry, darling. Your time has finally come.”