Spark of Intent Read online

  Nothing yet. She hasn’t come home and she hasn’t called yet either. I projected into each of my brothers’ heads. It was blessedly quiet now that Ciran was out. Where the hell that guy kept disappearing to, none of us knew.

  “Fuck.” The emotion behind that one word was thick, and I felt the deep sadness and regret roll through Killian’s mind. He just wanted her home—we all did.

  Give her time. She’s with Rini. She’ll be home soon. I tried to ease everyone. The truth was, I’d barely been able to sleep last night either. None of us had. Dreams of Nix calling out to me kept me up tossing and turning while I wished for her to come home. The garbled sound of her calling my name had sounded like it was spoken underwater, skirting around the periphery of broken, unsettled dreams. I clenched my jaw, trying to calm myself, trying to convince myself it was only a dream fueled by the stress of the night before. I couldn’t sleep without her here. Every night when she went to bed, I liked knowing she was under my roof—safe and sound. Without her here, the house felt empty—even though the five of us were still in it.

  The sound of a car zooming down the road caught our attention. We all straightened, each of us ridgid and taut as we held our collective breaths, hoping it would turn into our drive and deliver our girl home. Each one of us deflated as it drove past, disappearing through the treeline.

  Ryder, who had stood from the kitchen table, plopped back down in his seat and propped his elbows on the table, resting his forehead in his palms. Without asking, Hiro set a coffee mug in front of the Ceraptor and rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently.

  “I’m so damn sorry.” Killian stepped off the last stair, joining us in the living room and sitting in the upholstered chair that sat next to the sectional—his usual seat. He bent over at the waist and dropped his head into his hands, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms.

  “We could just go to her.” Ryder perked up at the idea. “We could leave right now!”

  It’s still early. She’s probably sleeping. It was a weak argument considering we each just needed to set eyes on her and know that she was alright. That we hadn’t damaged our whole relationship with one fight. One fight that had set off all her triggers.

  My stomach sank in my body, dropping to the fucking floor. The waves of pain she’d let me experience before she walked out had left me sick and hurting. I never wanted her to hurt like that again. I wished with my entire being that I could take that pain and banish it from her—we all did. My Gargoyle growled his agreement—wanting nothing more than to protect her for the rest of her life.

  We took pleasure in the fact that Henri—Michael—was dead, but we wanted to fucking kill her foster brother for ever daring to touch her. If we ever got our hands on him, he’d die a slow and painful death—and I wouldn’t even feel guilty for ridding the world of another sexual predator. I felt my fangs extending as my Gargoyle forced his way to the surface. Roars and hisses of agreement rattled through my mind from my brothers, echoing my brooding thoughts of revenge. Sharp claws extended past my fingers, shifting back and forth from my human nails to those of my alter, the lethal tips pricking my palms as I squeezed my hands into fists.

  While Killian had been the one to say the word that set her off, each of us was responsible for not breaking up the fight sooner—before words were spoken. I’d been so consumed with my own set of demons and trying to stay sane around Killian’s brother that my guilt ran as thickly through our connection as Killian’s did. Each of the guys took the weight onto their own shoulders, seeing the million other paths we could have taken to avoid the screaming match that had ensued.

  I felt Killian sink deeper into his regret, trying to shoulder all the blame himself.

  Don’t. We’ve been over this, I scolded, pulling him back from spiraling down that dark path once more. None of us knew that would be a trigger for her. We know now, and it will never happen again. I put more force between the word ‘never’ than I probably needed to. We were all being eaten alive by remorse.

  Ryder and Hiro were whispering quietly in the other room, and Theo was tapping his finger on his coffee mug when the trill of a phone pierced the air, immediately drawing our collective attention.

  Theo pulled his phone from his pocket and glanced at the screen. His gaze shot to mine and I quickly inserted myself into his mind. Rini, he murmured, sliding his thumb across the sleek surface to answer the call and greeting the Sun Bear.

  “Theo, she’s gone!” Rini’s voice seeped through the phone, and I heard every last panicked note through my connection to Theo.

  “Quiet!” The fierceness in my voice brooked no argument, and everyone around me quickly ceased their side conversations as I projected to conversation to each of my brothers. Theo had straightened by the window, his posture turning to steel as he narrowed his eyes and spoke sharply.

  “Rini. Where’s Nix?” There was a rough edge in his voice when he demanded answers.

  “I… we… can’t find her…” Rini stammered, dismay clogging her voice.

  My gaze darted to Theo’s, and his eyes were fiery in return. Setting his coffee cup down gently—controlled—on the end table, he calmly barked into the cell phone, even though his mind was reeling from Rini’s revelation.

  “What do you mean she’s gone and you can’t find her?” Theo repeated, voice hardened as all the guys crowded closer, testosterone and anger simmering in the background. “Explain.”

  “When I woke up, Nix wasn’t there. I don’t know when she disappeared, but her scent was still fresh. We followed it to the Council’s Lodge…” Rini trailed off.

  “What aren’t you saying Rini?” Theo pressed.

  “And who the hell is ‘we’?” Killian interjected.

  “Her scent disappeared, fading off at a barrier. I don’t have as much access as you do. I’m with my bears and Ciarán, and even he couldn’t cross the ward.”

  “Ciarán is with you?” Confusion burned through all of us.

  “This doesn’t make any sense. Why would Nix sneak off? And to the Council?” The disbelief radiating from Ryder wasn’t hard to understand. Nix had zero trust for the Council. She thought she was blocking me out all those mornings when she snuck to the backyard to practice, but I heard her every time she slipped down the stairs—I hadn’t slept well in weeks, and her nightmares crept into my waking dreams every morning. Each one centered around Michael or the Council. It had only fueled my heartache over the revelation that my father had known the sadistic part-blood who’d raised and abused her. I kept tabs on her every time she held one of her own training sessions, making sure she was safe while she practiced. She’d sought privacy, and I’d given her that, but I regretted all the division we had between us now—each of us harboring our own issues and keeping our burdens to ourselves instead of sharing them and leaning on our family. And it was my fault for shutting down our link. I’d tried to keep the burden of my father’s revelation from the guys and Nix while I worked to figure out what it meant, worried I’d lose her and how she’d react if my family had anything to do with the man who made her life a living hell. I hadn’t been what my brother and my mate needed, and in doing so I’d endangered Nix.

  Red hot anger burned through my veins, most of it directed at myself. My heart pounded hard in my chest as I tried to come up with answers that would help us find Nix.

  “Barrett, Caydan, and Donovan came to talk to me and Ciarán tagged along. That’s not important right now,” Rini nearly growled. “The Council caught us sniffing around the grounds of their precious lodge, and they questioned what we were doing. I’m sure it looked suspicious—a mythological spending time with a normal shifter.” I could hear the sneer in her tone coming through the phone as she disparaged herself and her class among the shifters.

  “What happened?” Theo tried to pull answers from the Sun Bear.

  “I wanted to ask them about Nix, but they weren’t going to give Ciar or my bears and me access to the warded areas, even if Ciar ha
d asked. Their disdain for animal shifters makes that quite clear,” she growled but continued quickly. “We rounded the island, and I didn’t pick up her scent again. It started at my house, and it ended at the Council. She’s not answering her phone. Maybe one of you can try to call her? See if she answers? Probably not Killian.” Rini sighed, sounded exhausted. “She was pretty upset last night.”

  Agony sliced through Killian’s chest, and I gently narrowed the connection to the other guys, choosing to keep Theo’s wide open. Whipping out my cell phone, I let my fingers fly as I located Nix in my phone and called her number.

  It rang once and went straight to voicemail, indicating that she’d either rejected my call or her phone was off. When the same pattern repeated itself twice more, my grip tightened around the glass and metal of my phone, nearly crushing the device in my hand. If I hadn’t had hope that Nix might call me on this phone, I could have easily destroyed it.

  Reminders of her calling out to me in my broken slumber radiated through my mind now, and a fresh wave of terror worked its way through my chest. She was gone. What if she was hurt? What if she’d been trying to reach out to me? I growled and my Gargoyles teeth elongated as worry and anger over her missing status besieged us, and I pushed all of it barrelling down the link to my brothers.

  Theo’s eyes were locked on mine as he analyzed my thoughts while thanking Rini and hanging up. “Killian.” Authority rang clear from Theo who assumed his leadership role. “Can you get the plane ready for takeoff? Can we fit us all?”

  Urgency spurred us all into action.

  “On it.” He walked away, calling James in the process.

  “James, I need the Cessna, now. No. The Grand Caravan. We’re all coming. You… you haven’t seen Nix have you? No? Not since last night. Thanks, just have it ready. Can you do a thorough round of flight checks? Yeah. I’ll do another round when I get there before take off, but we don’t have any time to lose. She’s missing.” With a grunt Killian hung up the phone. “Let’s move.”

  “Someone should stay here in case she shows back up at home,” Theo ordered, looking around the room.

  I didn’t need my mental connection to know that none of them wanted to stay home, but Ryder nodded an agreement to stay behind.

  “I don’t think you’re our best choice,” Theo interceeded.

  Ryder’s hands went to fists as he stepped up to Theo. “And why not?”

  “Down, Ceraptor,” Theo ordered. “Because we might need your healing powers,” he confessed and everyone deflated.

  “He’s right.” Hiro wiped a hand down his face. “I’ll stay.”

  “If James flies, I could stay behind.” Killian gruffly offered, and his doubt over whether Nix would even want to see him zipped through our minds.

  “We need you, Kill. You’re our pilot, and your illusion skills could be needed.”

  “I’m staying. Go. Now.” The decision was taken out of our hands at Hiro’s command. “Go find our girl.”

  The half an hour flight had felt like a lifetime, and once we landed we’d all spread out and spent the majority of the day searching every inch of the large island for Nix, all to no avail. We hadn’t caught sight or scent of her, any trail she’d left fading out as each minute ticked by.

  My hair was thoroughly mussed as I paced, trying to come up with ideas. She was gone. Missing. And it was making us all crazy.

  Killian was pacing, his hands clenched into fists before relaxing and clenching again. His frustration was near anger—mostly aimed at himself and the rest at the world.

  Each hour, each minute that passed brought us closer to panic.

  Mate. My Gargoyle growled in my head, ready to be unleashed so he could tear the island apart rock by rock to find our girl. The need to protect her burned through my body.

  “I’m going to call my dad.” The words were quiet but the others instantly froze.

  “Why in the hell would you do that?” Killian gaped at me, unable to control his shock.

  “Rini said she went to Council territory. Dad would have been notified of any alerts. If she trespassed and they removed her from the area, she may be stuck and unable to contact us.”

  “That’s bullshit,” Ryder growled the words. “You really think they’d just toss her off the property?”

  I winced, shaking my head. No, I didn’t believe it. However, I’d much rather imagine that they had removed her from the property than turned her over for punishment. The other guys winced as well.

  “Whatever the case may be. They have no reason to notify us. We’re not family to her in their eyes.” I met grim face after grim face. “Hopefully, I can convince my dad to tell me if they know anything. Their house is right by the air strip. It can’t hurt to at least have a little information before we tear apart Alaska to find her.” My voice had taken on a pleading note by the end of the sentence as I appealed to my brothers. As much as I didn’t want to face my father, I couldn’t lose Nix, and I would use any benefit I could get my hands on to reach her.

  “A quick stop.” Theo’s words were quiet but we all caught them. “James is still going to be prepping the plane. Do not give away that she is dissatisfied with the Council. Use any excuse you like. We need to be careful, D. If they think she was trespassing, they will search her out at a later date.” I nodded my understanding, and jerked my head to the door.

  “Someone check in with Hiro and let him know what’s going on. Everyone who’s coming, let’s go.” I grabbed my keys from the counter and headed towards the car.

  The trip towards my parents’ house seemed to have taken forever. I think all of us were holding our breath, praying that the phones set out on the console would ring, that she had just been out walking to clear her head like she’d been known to do and she was home safe in Hiro’s arms. The phones remained ominously silent, though.

  I pulled the Hummer up in front of my parents’ cabin, the glow of the lights through the window warm and welcoming against the colored leaves and dusting of snow. “This will go faster if we’re not all in there.” I glanced at my brothers who were all getting ready to jump from the car.

  “You’ve got five minutes, D.” Theo’s eyes were hard as he glanced at the others. “After that, we’re coming in. If they haven’t seen her, we need to move on. I don’t want to waste time. If they have, we will go get her, whether the Council likes it or not.” I murmured my assent and exited the car.

  The chill didn’t bother me as my boots left footprints in their wake. With each step, I guarded my mind, preparing for the inquisition and the lack of mental privacy.

  I knocked briefly, letting myself in. I knew the door would be unlocked; I don’t think it had ever been locked in the entire time the house had belonged to my family. I could smell melting chocolate and cinnamon and headed towards the kitchen. “Hey, Mom.” My mom smiled at me over the bowl of cookie dough that she was scooping onto cookie sheets to put into the oven.

  “Damien!” She set her tray aside, coming over to brush a kiss across my cheek. “This is a surprise. You haven’t been home to visit in awhile. Did your father know you were coming?”

  I returned the kiss across her cheek, but moved past her towards my father’s study. “No, but I need to speak with him.”

  “Did you bring the other guys with you? You just missed dinner, but I’ve got fresh chocolate chip cookies for dessert.” She indicated the racks behind her. “I know how much they love them. Do you want to take some home with you? Or are they joining you?”

  “Not today, Mom.” I headed for the study, ignoring the trays of cookies stacked around me. She turned off the oven, following me.

  “You’re turning down cookies, something must be wrong.” She eyed me as I headed down the hall, her gaze assessing as she searched me for injuries.

  “I just need to talk to him.” I knocked briefly before opening the study door. My father was involved in his books, not even looking up as we entered.

  “Your cookies smell amaz
ing, as always. Just leave the plate there. I need to finish this.” I could hear the smile in his words, though he didn’t look up.

  “Dad.” He jolted, turning to face me.

  “Damien. I didn’t know you were visiting.” He pushed his books aside reaching for a cookie as he leaned back in his office chair. “For that, I’ll put away the work.”

  “Dad, I can’t stay long. This isn’t a visit.” He straightened, his eyes searching for injury the same way my Mom’s had.

  “Well, then. What exactly do you need?” His voice was cool, the Councilman rather than the father.

  “Nix is missing.” He froze, his eyes widening as he considered me. “We all got into a fight. Some things were said…” I trailed off in disgust, running my fingers through my hair, still ashamed of how we all had treated the woman we just wanted to cherish.

  “Oh, Damien,” my mom whispered the words, shaking her head. “You know you need to control your temper. All of you do.” The gentle scolding was replaced by a supportive hand on my back and a cookie pressed into my palm. “She probably just went to a friend’s to cool off.”

  My father relaxed slightly as he nodded his agreement. “Did you check her dorm room? Or her friend’s houses?” I hesitated, not exactly sure how to phrase the fact that we knew she wouldn’t go to her dorm.

  “She went to Theo’s sleuth, but it seems she’s wandered off. She likes to walk when she’s upset.” I kept my words cool, not tossing any accusations. “She was so near Council territory, I thought maybe she had gone to see Gaspard or asked for something in the medical building to help her calm down.” Internally I scoffed at that, but made sure my mental walls were solid so my dad had no reason to dig deeper. I could feel his tugs at my wall, his instinctive searching for cracks and details.

  “No wards were broken last night or I would have been alerted,” he admitted, continuing to study me, his power still washing over mine. “Would you like me to organize a search party? It isn’t good for a rare shifter to be missing like this, Damien. You know the Council will not approve.” I knew the words were a warning. While we weren’t considered her family, we were responsible at this point for protecting her and, to an extent, keeping her happy while the Council tried to solidify her place in our culture. She had already been injured multiple times while under our care, and the Council would be furious if we lost her, especially due to a personal fight.