Grin and Bear It Read online

  She smiled and looked him in the eye. “I was named after my grandmother. It’s Ukrainian.” She pushed the blanket over his leg to look at the surgery wounds on his calves and thighs. As she went over to the sink and cabinet to get the medical supplies she’d need to clean them, like they all did when they came into his room, he couldn’t help but stare at her.

  Out of all the nurses he’d had she’d been the only one to have an attitude toward him that wasn’t defensive. Yeah, he did act like an asshole the majority of the time, and although he should feel guilt over snapping at the personnel at the hospital, he couldn’t because he was filled with so much hatred and anger.

  For the next five minutes he lay there watching her clean and redress the wounds on his legs from when he’d had surgery to try to give him a chance of not losing any ability down there. The higher she went up the more he felt this tightness in his body. She stopped at his upper thigh, peeled the dressing back, and lifted her gaze to his.

  “This one is just about healed. I’ll ask the doctor to put in an order to discontinue the dressing, but he’ll be in later today to see you anyway.”

  He nodded and cleared his throat. She dressed it with a bandage again, and the soft touch of her finger on him, even though she wore the latex gloves, gave him major wood. Yeah, he was a dick fuck for popping a hard-on for his nurse when she was just trying to help him out.

  Then she checked the bullet wound on his chest, cleaned and redressed that, and lifted her gaze to his. Maybe she’d sensed him staring at her? He certainly wasn’t trying to hide it.

  “You need anything before I leave?” she asked and walked over to the wastebasket to throw away the dressings and gloves. As she went to the sink and washed her hands, the filthy fucking sexual images he had of what she could do to him before she left made him feel like a sick bastard.

  He cleared his throat again, feeling uncomfortable as hell because of his sudden reaction to her, but shook his head in response to her question. “I’m good.”

  “Okay, well your call light is right beside you, so if you need anything let me know, Mason.” She smiled again and left the room. He swore that smile could light up a damn room, just push the darkness he felt inside of him away for the moment.

  He watched her through the double glass doors of his room, saw her talking to another nurse, and when she glanced over at him they held each other’s gazes for a suspended moment. She smiled again, and he knew that whatever it was about her that made him feel like this, feel off balance, wasn’t something that he felt especially comfortable with.

  Chapter Two

  Never get involved with a patient.

  It was a really simple and easy thing to follow, up until now. Of course Ryeissa hadn’t gotten a marriage proposal, or an invitation to go out to dinner, but that wasn’t the kind of “getting involved” she was referring to.

  She looked at Mason through the glass window at the nurses’ station, saw him lying in bed watching TV, and a part of her empathized with what was going on with him. He was young, older than she was by only a couple of years, but so young to be in this situation. The threat of possibly not regaining full function of his legs had to be hard on him, especially given the fact he was also a bear shifter and she knew his kind needed to be able to run in their animal form.

  He was hurting inside, she knew that, saw it on his face when she looked at him, felt it in the way he held himself, in the anger that poured from him. She wanted to help him, to help him heal, not just as his nurse and caregiver, but as a woman wanting to help a man she’d grown attached to. And yes, she’d grown attached to him. It wasn’t love, wasn’t even lust, although he was a brutally attractive male. It was just the fact she wanted him to open up, to feel again.

  But she kept her composure, had her “game face” always on, and was only ever professional toward him. The teasing was her way of trying to get him to open up, to try to see that she wasn’t an enemy, but someone on his side.

  He’d been transferred from a hospital in Denver weeks ago to the hospital in Steel Corner, and in town his MC was very well known. She knew about The Grizzly MC. In Steel Corner they were feared, had a reputation of being badass, a club you didn’t mess with. But they also were known for helping out the town when needed. They didn’t care who knew they did illegal things, or who they had to hurt that threatened their club.

  Over the last few weeks she’d gotten to know everything about Mason, not because he was especially forthcoming with information, but because she’d seen his medical history, heard the rumors, and was told by the others who and what he was.

  He was a big guy, tall, muscular, with tattoos that covered his chest and arms. This darkness covered him though, and she wondered the life he must have led being in a one-percenter biker gang. Yeah, she knew enough about MCs to know that The Grizzly MC wasn’t one that followed the rules, so to speak. They did what they wanted, participated in plenty of illegal activity, from what she’d heard, and they were feared but respected in town.

  She’d just moved to Steel Corner a few years ago, but in that time she’d come to learn everything there was to know about the mountain town. This was her home. The residents within it were friendly, if reserved, and she couldn’t see herself anywhere else.

  “He scares me a little.”

  Ryeissa turned and looked at Jaxson, another nurse on duty. He sat beside her and glanced through the window at Mason.

  “Really?” She looked at Mason, too.

  “You’re not scared?”

  She shrugged, her focus still on Mason. “He can be fearsome, no doubt about it, but he’s just a guy at the end of the day.”

  Jaxson snorted. “He’s a bear shifter in a motorcycle gang.” He looked at her again.

  “He’s just a kid that got hurt.”

  Jaxson looked at her like she was insane.

  “A kid? Rye, he is a grown man that could probably kill someone with his bare hands.” Jaxson looked at Mason ago and lowered his voice. “Probably has.”

  Ryeissa looked at Mason, and as the two of them watched the MC member he turned and stared at them.

  “Shit, you think he heard me?” Jaxson said in a low voice.

  “Yeah, I do. You better run,” Ryeissa said seriously, but smiled.

  Jaxson got up when one of his call lights went off, and Ryeissa went back to looking at her paperwork, but the feeling of being watched, the sensation of the hair on her arms standing on end, had her looking up and seeing that Mason watched her. They held each other’s gazes for what seemed like forever, so long that she shifted on her seat and had to look away, breaking the contact.

  Her heart raced, her face got hot, and she knew what she felt for this man, technically a man she didn’t know personally, was uncalled for. She needed to focus on her work, and not on the tattooed bear shifter just a few feet from her.

  That was safe, because playing with these ideas and feelings she had for Mason was not something she should even be thinking about.

  ****

  Mason felt the sweat run down his back, cover his forehead, but he was determined to do this on his own. He grabbed the bar in front of him and pulled himself up. It had been another week that he’d been trapped in this damn hospital, but the doctor had come in and said he’d be discharged at the end of the week. That had given him the encouragement he needed to get his ass in gear.

  He stared at the wall in front of him, continued to pull himself up and lower himself slowly. He had been doing this for the last ten minutes, his focus trained, his thoughts on vengeance.

  “I think that’s enough for today, Mason,” the PT said.

  Mason let out this growl, his bear right there at the surface because his anger was so intense, had been for weeks.

  “Listen, growl all you want, but I’m here to help you.”

  Mason looked over at Jeremy, the guy that had been helping him with his physical therapy since he’d been here.

  “You want to keep going at this
rate you’re going to end up backtracking. I know you want to heal, but breaking yourself won’t accomplish that.”

  Mason glared at the PT for a second, then slowly lowered himself back on the chair.

  “Good. I know you don’t want to be here, and you think by doing more, that you’ll heal faster, but it isn’t how it works.”

  Mason grunted and accepted the towel Jeremy gave him.

  “I think you’re good for today. Let’s get back to your room.”

  Once Mason was back in his room he grabbed a change of clothes and headed to the bathroom. He was supposed to call for help, but he hated the fact he couldn’t even take a fucking shower in this place without someone waiting for him. But as he wheeled his way into the bathroom there was a knock on his door.

  Ryeissa stepped inside, crossing her arms under her breasts, and having Mason’s dick jerk from the sight of those huge mounds pressing against her top.

  “I didn’t put on my light,” he snapped, hating that he had to use anger because right now he felt so damn hateful. Her job was to help him, and the guilt that he was pushing people away pissed him off. He pissed himself off.

  “Yeah, I know. That’s the point of me coming in here.” She stepped inside and shut the door. “Mason, I’m your nurse and here to help. If you were to fall in there you could really hurt yourself, which would set back your healing and possibly have you staying in here longer.” She lifted a brow, almost as if challenging him. “You really want to be stuck here longer than you have to be?”

  He scrubbed a hand over his face, and brought it up and over his head, running his fingers over the short strands. “Fuck no,” he said, not caring that he’d cursed, but wanting to apologize. “Sorry.”

  “You don’t have to be sorry. I just want you to be safe.” She moved closer. “Besides, if you fell I’d have to do a lot of paperwork,” she said in a teasing voice. “You’d be inconveniencing me, Mason.”

  Damn, he liked when she said his name, and fortunately he had the towel covering his dick, because if not she’d surely see the erection he sported.

  “You know the drill. I’ll help you in, you can get undressed, and then I’ll give you privacy. But you have to promise to ring that call light when you’re done. Okay?”

  He grunted and gave a sharp nod.

  Once they were in the bathroom she started the shower, adjusted the chair in the stall for him, and turned to look down at him. “You need help with your shoes or getting undressed?” she said with a stoic expression, her voice all business.

  The very thought of her undressing him had his cock throbbing in arousal, but self-hatred and shame that he might actually need help at all pissed him off even more. He used to be a really fucking strong male, and now, in this damn wheelchair, he felt like a weakling, like a failure. He’d push himself hard to get back to his former self, because the alternative—this alternative—was not going to be his reality.

  “I’m good.”

  She smiled at him. “Promise you’ll use that call light when you’re done.”

  “Yeah,” he said but didn’t look at her. He couldn’t. She was beautiful and caring, and he could sense in the air, from the aroma that came from her, that she was genuine and really did give a shit about him, and was not just acting like this because it was her job.

  She stepped out of the bathroom, and he stared at the closed door for several seconds before finally getting his shit together. He needed to stay focused, worry about why he wanted to desperately get better. Yeah, he wanted back to the way things were, to the way he’d been, but also to fuck up those assholes that had put him in this goddamned situation.

  He got undressed, his focus on the game, on his plans. Hell, he was even more focused on beating some humans’ asses than the issues he had before it all started.

  Jakob.

  Maybe the situation with Jakob wasn’t that big of a deal, but to Mason it was. They were family, blood even if they weren’t from the same parents. He wanted shit to be good between them.

  As much as he’d wanted to patch things up with Jakob, had even tried apologizing because of what he’d done, all Mason had been able to focus on was himself. And even if that made him one shitty asshole it was the way things had to go down until things got cleared up.

  Exhaling, and his thoughts instantly going back to the humans that had run him down, he stared at his blurry reflection in the mirror. Although he hadn’t wanted the club to help him take down the assholes that had hurt him, he had found out who they were. It had been those human assholes that had crashed a Grizzly party a while back, the ones that had acted like they’d had big balls to be going up against them.

  Yeah, it had been them that had fucked with the wrong bear shifter.

  He’d hunt them down, preferably on his own. He didn’t want the MC involved in this, even if they were his family, his brothers. He needed to do this on his own, when the time was right. Only then would he feel like he could move on.

  Chapter Three

  Ryeissa stayed close to Mason’s room because she was worried he’d be too hardheaded and proud to use the light when he was finished. She knew a man like him was probably used to always being in control, to having the upper hand in everything in his life. Right now he probably felt weak, unable to have any kind of power over how things went.

  When the bathroom light when off, an alert that was different from if he’d just used his call light on his bed, she stopped working on her paperwork and went into his room. Her heart was beating fast, hard, and when he called out that she could come in she had to take a deep breath.

  The room was humid, warm, and after a second of her vision clearing she swore everything stalled in her when she saw Mason sitting there in nothing but a pair of sweats. His chest was damp from the shower, and droplets of water covered the hard, tattooed flesh. His nipple was pierced, and although he’d been in the hospital for several weeks recuperating he was still so powerful. She knew he overdid it at times during PT, because of the note from the therapist. Although she wanted to tell him he should take it easy, saying anything like that to a man like Mason, a bear shifter, wouldn’t prove useful.

  It was when she realized that she’d been standing there staring at him for far longer than was appropriate, that she felt her face heat and put her nurse persona back on.

  “Thank you for using the light, Mason.”

  He was still looking at her, his dark hair short and slightly spiky around his head, and the light coloring of his eyes were a contrast to the darkness that seemed to surround him.

  “I didn’t want to inconvenience you,” he said in a hard voice, but when he smirked she couldn’t help but smile at his teasing.

  She would have preferred to be here before he’d gotten out of the shower, but he’d put the light on regardless, and she knew for him that had to have been hard itself. Ryeissa tried not to stare at his chest, at how big he was, how powerful. The Grizzly MC tattoo on the side of his ribs, the ink angry, dangerous, and frightening in appearance, had this wave of arousal slamming into her. God, she was losing it.

  The low sound that came from Mason had her snapping her attention to his face, her eyes widening as she saw the lightness of his eyes suddenly become dark as night. Even though she was just a human, she could sense his bear right there, the animal watching her, staring back at her.

  It was then she realized he’d smelled her arousal, that he could sense that as easily as he could see her inhaling and exhaling. Humiliation but also this intense awareness came over her, and she actually took a step back. This situation was inappropriate on her part, but it was also so confusing, so consuming. Was the sound he made one of a warning because she was having this pleasure course through her at looking at him? Or was it something else?

  A knock on the room door had her turning around, away from Mason and his godlike physique, and tried to calm herself.

  “Yo? Mason?” a man with a very deep voice called out.

  “Come on, you
have visitors,” she said and cleared her throat, moved behind the wheelchair, and started pushing him out of the bathroom. But before they walked through the doorway he placed a hand on hers, turned slightly around, and looked up at her.

  “Ryeissa,” he said her name so deeply, so harshly almost, that her heart felt like it stalled in her chest.

  She could see his muscles tensing from the act of him moving on the chair, turning to he could look at her. His eyes were still that black color, as if he couldn’t control himself.

  He didn’t say anything though, just inhaled deeply, as if he were taking in all the air, sucking it into his lungs until she thought she might pass out. It felt like they stared like that for hours, looking at each other, neither one speaking or moving, but finally when she heard more people come into the room, more of them talking, she snapped out of this trance she was in and pushed him into the room.

  “Let me know if you need anything, Mason.” Ryeissa couldn’t get out of there fast enough, and once she shut his room door and could actually breathe again, she knew that being around Mason was making this situation, making keeping her composure and self-control, feel like the hardest thing she’d ever had to do.

  “Hey, you good?” Jaxson asked as he walked by, two IV bags in his hands and the tubing draped over his arm.

  She licked her lips and nodded. “I’m good.”

  Jaxson looked at her for several more seconds, his eyebrows knitted, but he finally gave a nod and moved on. She exhaled, turned from the door, and made her way toward the nurses’ station. She could feel Mason’s gaze on her as if she were staring right at him, their eyes locked.

  She was losing it, and she needed to get control. This was a dangerous slope she was going down, and she didn’t want to face-plant when she hit the bottom.

  ****

  “Damn, Mason,” Gabriel said, his focus on Ryeissa who could be seen through the window in his room. She was over at the nurses’ station, her back to them, and her hair in another long braid.