Isle of Palms Read online

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright Page

  Dedication

  Acknowledgements

  One - Hearts of Fire

  Two - Split Ends

  Three - Violet

  Four - Miss Mavis Says, There Goes the Neighborhood

  Five - Loose Screws

  Six - Light of Day

  Seven - How’s Trix?

  Eight - Changing Tide

  Nine - Miss Mavis Says, Check Your Roots

  Ten - The Chicken Was Committed

  Eleven - I’ve Had Sufficient, Thank You

  Twelve - Getting Hairy

  Thirteen - Tangled Liberation

  Fourteen - The Palms Salon and Spa

  Fifteen - Really Cheesy

  Sixteen - Hair of the Dog

  Seventeen - Who’s That Girl?

  Eighteen - Rare and Well Done

  Nineteen - Miss Mavis and Miss Angel Confer

  Twenty - SKewered

  Twenty-one - A Little Help from My Friends

  Twenty-two - Show Time!

  Twenty-three - Long Walk off a Short Pier

  Twenty-four - The Hole in the Bottom of the Sea

  Twenty-five - Hello and Good-bye

  Twenty-six - Miss Mavis Says, Cluck, Cluck

  Twenty-seven - Rock the Boat, Baby

  Twenty-eight - Incredible Odds

  Twenty-nine - Plan for the Mother Lode

  Thirty - Culture Gap

  Thirty-one - Waxing Eloquent

  Thirty-two - La Bomb-ba

  Thirty-three - Love’s Labor Found

  Thirty-four - Chicken Dance

  Thirty-five - Nightmares No More

  Thirty-six - Regroup

  Thirty-seven - Mad Dogs

  Epilogue

  Author’s Note

  READERS GUIDE FOR Isle of Palms

  Discussion Questions

  “Dorothea Benton Frank is the bad girl of southern fiction—

  the bad, bad girl. Her books are funny, sexy,

  and usually damp with seawater.”

  —Pat Conroy

  Praise for Dorothea Benton Frank’s Isle of Palms

  “Isle of Palms is as light and gratifying as a sand dollar just washed to shore . . . The author and Anna like to remind folks of the things that matter most: finding inner peace, learning to forgive, and cherishing friends who become family.”—The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

  “Entertaining . . . Garrulous, engaging Anna’s a treat, talking up a storm about life in the South Carolina Lowcountry as she makes her second coming of age. Really, it’s best just to take Anna’s initial advice—sit back, relax, sip some sweet tea, and listen up. She’s got a story to tell.”—Orlando Sentinel

  “[A] page-turner.”—St. Petersburg Times

  “Frank uses the same sweet southern charms that enticed readers to her previous novels, Sullivan’s Island and Plantation . . . A fun summer read, and its scenery entices the reader to take a trip to the beach.”

  —The Daily Oklahoman

  “Beneath the Fannie Flagg-style jocularity and small-town anecdotes lies a more serious subject: loneliness. Credit this unlikely cast of characters with having the strength to form unconventional loving relationships, an ad hoc family of sorts, to fill the void left by their less-than-perfect biological ones. Upbeat and uplifting, Anna’s song is one of hope in the face of modern realities for all those whose dreams have been derailed by circumstance.” —The Fort Myers News-Press

  “Her novels are hilarious and full of richly amusing characters.”

  —The Myrtle Beach Sun News

  “[Frank] defies convention and weaves comically twisted plot lines for each of her characters . . . Fans of Sullivan’s Island and Plantation will not be disappointed . . . Anna’s narration makes Isle of Palms stand out.”—The Florida Times-Union

  Sullivan’s Island

  “The setting and the characters are blazingly authentic . . . Frank evokes the eccentric Hamilton family and their feisty Gullah housekeeper with originality and conviction; Susan herself—smart, sarcastic, funny, and endearingly flawed—makes a lively and memorable narrator. Thanks to these scrappily compelling portraits, this is a rich read.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

  “Dorothea Frank and I share the exact same literary territory . . . Sullivan’s Island is hilarious and wise, an up-to-the-minute report on what it is like to be alive and female in the South Carolina Lowcountry today. It contains the funniest sex scene I have ever encountered.”

  —Pat Conroy

  “Dottie Frank’s take on the South Carolina Lowcountry is tough, tender, achingly real, and very, very funny. Sullivan’s Island roars with life.”—Anne Rivers Siddons

  “In Sullivan’s Island, southern womanhood has found a new voice, and it is outrageous, hilarious, relentless, and impossible to ignore.”

  —John Berendt

  “One heck of a beach book . . . Frank keeps you reading compulsively.” —The Charlotte Observer

  “A satisfying treat . . . Dorothea Benton Frank ventures into the territory of another three-named writer, Anne Rivers Siddons.”

  —Orlando Sentinel

  “Those who enjoy Pat Conroy or Anne Rivers Siddons will not be disappointed.” —Library Journal

  “Authentic characters and setting . . . a very moving story of family, love, and place.”—The Knoxville News-Sentinel

  “A novel that should be on every ‘beach reading’ list this summer.”

  —The Greenville (SC) News

  Plantation

  “Effortlessly evokes the lush beauty of the South Carolina Lowcountry while exploring the complexities of family relationships . . . Readers will enjoy immersing themselves in the lives of these deftly drawn, heartfelt characters.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

  “Think Terry McMillan meets Rebecca Wells by way of the Deep South and you’ll be barking up the right bayou.”

  —The Mirror (London)

  “Filled with entertaining characters and lots of humor.”

  —The Columbia (SC) State

  Titles by Dorothea Benton Frank

  SHEM CREEK

  ISLE OF PALMS

  PLANTATION

  SULLIVAN’S ISLAND

  THE BERKLEY PUBLISHING GROUP

  Published by the Penguin Group

  Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA

  Penguin Group (Canada), 10 Alcorn Avenue, Toronto, Ontario M4V 3B2, Canada

  (a division of Pearson Penguin Canada Inc.)

  Penguin Books Ltd., 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England

  Penguin Group Ireland, 25 St. Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2, Ireland (a division of Penguin Books Ltd.)

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  (a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty. Ltd.)

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  (a division of Pearson New Zealand Ltd.)

  Penguin Books (South Africa) (Pty.) Ltd., 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196,

  South Africa

  Penguin Books Ltd., Registered Offices: 80 Strand, London WC2R 0RL, England

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2003 by Dorothea Benton Frank.

  All rights reserved.

  No part o
f this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions.

  BERKLEY is a registered trademark of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  The “B” design is a trademark belonging to Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

  eISBN : 978-0-425-20010-0

  Frank, Dorothea Benton.

  Isle of palms: a lowcountry tale / Dorothea Benton Frank.

  p. cm.

  1. Women—South Carolina—Fiction. 2. Isle of Palms (S.C.)—Fiction. 3. South Carolina—

  Fiction. 4. Islands—Fiction. I. Title.

  PS3556.R3338185 2003

  813’.6—dc21

  2003044442

  http://us.penguingroup.com

  For my wonderful children,

  Victoria and William

  Barrier Island

  Where nothing is certain, we awaken

  to another night of delicate rain

  falling as if it didn’t want to

  disturb anyone. On and off

  foghorns groan. The lighthouse beacon

  circles the island. For hours, melancholy

  waves tear whatever land we’re standing on.

  Listen to sea—rain dripping

  Through fog, suspended at the edge of the earth

  on a circle of sand where we are always

  moving slowly toward land.

  —MARJORY WENTWORTH,

  poet laureate of South Carolina

  Acknowledgments

  THIS story is the result of the friendship and support of many people. First, I want to thank my family—Peter, Victoria, and William—for their unwavering support and great ideas on certain scenes and dialogue. It can’t be easy to live with someone who lives behind a closed door half the time. I love y’all more than I could ever say. And I want to offer some seriously bended knee thanks to my beautiful daughter, Victoria, who helped me plot many chapters in this book involving Emily and made sure her language and slang rang true. You mean a teenager in the year 2002 wouldn’t say neato, groovy, or golly gee whiz? Thanks, sweetheart, for putting this old poop on the right track.

  Here comes the disclaimer: the grandmother in this book bears no resemblance to my actual mother-in-law. Hanna Frank of Dearborn, Michigan, is a saintly woman, a gentle woman, who did indeed immigrate to the United States after World War II. She was very generous to allow me to use some of her experiences, but the personality of Violet Lutz in this story is a raving paranoid. Hanna Frank is perfectly sane, extremely intelligent, and thank God, she possesses a healthy sense of humor.

  And naturally, I want to thank Shannon Gibbons, my best girlfriend, for proofing this and for listening to me moan when the going got tough. Rar rar rar! That’s an inside joke about talking dogs, but she’ll know what I mean.

  I thought it would be fun to use a lot of real people as characters in this book so I want to thank the following warm, wonderful and trusting people for the use of their names: Big Al from Shem Creek Bar & Grill and of course John and Angie Avinger, who own the place, for their generosity. Next, Mary Meehan, Mrs. Helen Clarkin, and Miss Marguerite Stith, who live in these pages as clients of the Palms Salon. Marilyn and Billy Davey, Betty Hudson, Larry Dodds, Patty Grisillo, Brigitte Miklaszewski, Bill the Butcher, Tommy Proctor, Dominique Simon, Ed Williams, Sparky Witte, and Miss Vicki, formerly of Dunleavy’s fame, and of course Patty and Bill Dunleavy, who own it and serve up the best hamburgers to be found. And special kudos to the Mayor of Sullivan’s Island, Marshall Stith, who owns the Station Twenty-two Restaurant. I asked him why his shrimp and grits were so good and he said probably it’s the butter and the half-and-half. Great. Good-bye, belt. Hello, sweatpants.

  Special thanks to one of my oldest and dearest childhood friends, Francesca Jean Gianaris. Hey, Fran! Aren’t we due for a Big Chill weekend on the island? Don’t forget, okay? To Charlie Moore for his extraordinary goodwill and the use of so good it’d make a bulldog break his chain! And huge thanks and love to my brother, Michael Benton, of Irving, Texas, a.k.a. the Reverend Ben Michaels, for performing the wedding! Lord, honey! We all thought those two would never tie the knot! You done good!

  Gargantuan thanks to all the salon community, who perform miracles every day and who gave me great advice and stories to tell—Francis DuBose of London Hair in Mount Pleasant, the entire cast of characters from Salon and Company on the Isle of Palms, and last but not least, that fabulously talented and wickedly funny magician William Howe of the John Barrett Salon in New York.

  Thanks to Bruce and all the guys at the Wine Connection in Pound Ridge, New York, for the correct vino to go with Anna and Jim’s dinner at High Cotton in Charleston, South Carolina. Think it’s easy to plan dinner, do you? Yeah, well, I hadda bring in some high-tone talent for that one!

  Many thanks also to Marjory Wentworth for her friendship and support. Madge! Love you, girl! When are you coming up? Special thanks to Michael Uslan, my Hollywood producer friend of Batman and Swamp Thing fame, who believes my crazy books should be movies and keeps trying to move that along with ideas while he’s busy with ninety-two projects of his own. Michael, if a serious offer ever shows up, you know who I’m calling, don’t you? Good. Okay. That’s settled then. And thanks to Mary Jo McInerny for her love, vigilance, humor, and everything—she’s the greatest cousin and friend a girl could have. And we have to discuss my other cousin, Charles “Comar” Blanchard Jr. Thank you, thank you, thank you! Without this handsome, young, talented fellow, my family could never enjoy the inner coastal waterway or sleep as well as we do when we are there. And Dennis Craver of Beaufort—what a great friend you are too! Honey, this man can flat steam some oysters! Also thanks to Alex and Zoe Sanders. To Jonathan Green, for lifting us up to a higher place. Love you, man!

  To Cassandra King, who is my writer buddy (and who wrote The Sunday Wife—go buy it!), for her friendship, advice, humor, support, and just for being such an inspiration to us all. And, okay, Pat Conroy, the Franks love you to pieces always and forever. You among all men we know have paid their lifetime dues with us. We will split the check where others go into comas. Come on back, anytime. Did y’all read his new book—My Losing Season? Everything he writes is fabulous. Gotcha, bubba!

  To Robert and Susan Rosen of Charleston for their decades of amazing friendship and generous support of my new career—I can’t think of a soul who wouldn’t be thrilled and honored to call y’all their friends.

  Special thanks to the township offices of the Isle of Palms and Mount Pleasant for providing me with statistical information and good humor.

  And now for the big kahunas at Berkley Publishing. Gee whiz. Where do I start? For Norman Lidofsky and his crew of Houdinis, I offer my services to polish your shoes. Okay, maybe I didn’t mean that literally, but my gratitude isn’t fiction. But you know how indebted I am to all of you. As always to Joni Friedman, my art director, for her unsurpassed visions of great beauty and to Rich Hasselberger, for your extraordinary efforts on my behalf, please accept my most sincere thanks.

  Obviously, I kiss the ground my magnificent and fearless publisher, Leslie Gelbman, walks on and thank her in all my prayers for her extreme patience, excellent guidance, and generous support. For Liz Perl and Hillary Schupf? Man! I love y’all so big time! Not only are you both brilliant but you make the hard parts of selling books such a breeze. Thank you, thank you. And so do you, Matthew Rich. Mr. Planet PR, I’ve got a place in my heart for you forever. And Buzzy Porter? Okay. Insider information: All southern writers, no, all writers on book tour should try to schedule a signing with Buzzy at B&N in Mount Pleasant, South Carolina. It will blow your mind at how this man can organize an event. Needless to say, you’ll sell a whole lot of books. Besides all that, Buzzy is a doll baby to work with. Little Debbies and cappuccinos! Love you, Buzzy! Crazy name but a very sane and very wonderful man.

  And I know
she’s sick to death of plays on her name, but who wouldn’t want their editor to have Fortune for a last name? Gail Fortune is the extraordinary talent behind anything worth a rip that comes out of my work. Not only does she have the capacity to see from day one what I’m trying to accomplish with a story, but she’s got the tool chest to help me get the job done. Never unkind, never anxious, always available. Gail, it’s you and me, baby. Forever! And, thank you for everything over and over.

  For my agent, Amy Berkower? Well, Amy? I never talk to you that I don’t learn something new about this crazy world. Thanks for understanding me and for all of your excellent help. Tell Al I still owe it all to his book—Writing the Blockbuster Novel.

  Finally, I’d like to say thank you to all the readers and booksellers. I’ve loved all the emails. I’ve loved being in your stores. Most of all I’ve loved connecting with you, especially when my stories inspire you to tell me yours. In a few short years you’ve shown me a truth that I suspected was there all along—that storytelling allows people to find common ground and better understand each other. In this very imperfect and uncertain world, a little more understanding and tolerance can only be a very good thing. Thank you and love you from the bottom of my heart, ’eah?

  Prologue

  OKAY. I had a dream about my mother last night and I always seem to dream of her when she has had a beyond-the-veilitch to scratch my back. She was waltzing with my father at an enormous celebration of some kind. They were smiling and having a wonderful time. I couldn’t remember ever seeing Doc so happy or Momma so beautiful. She never said a word. She just smiled at me. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her but for some reason, I couldn’t speak.