'Tis the Season Read online

  ‘As a matter of fact, I do mind.’ He scowled blackly.

  ‘I can’t get out of bed until you leave,’ she snapped exasperatedly.

  He raised disbelieving brows. ‘You aren’t trying to tell me that after last night you’re actually feeling shy at the idea of my seeing you naked?’

  It did seem a little ridiculous—more than a little—after the intimacies they had shared during the night. But that was exactly what Caro was feeling!

  Last night it had been dark, with only the moonlight reflecting on the snow outside to lighten the room, and that pale reflection had cast their bodies mainly into shadow. But it was completely daylight now, and Caro was completely aware of the fact that she had been pregnant since Jake had last seen her naked in the daylight. The necessary swelling of her body had left its mark on her. No amount of oil or lotions rubbed into her skin had prevented those tell-tale stretch marks of pregnancy…

  She drew in a ragged breath. ‘Are you deliberately trying to embarrass me?’

  Jake gave a rueful shake of his head as he sat up. ‘I’m trying—and obviously not succeeding—to tell you that I like the changes to your body.’

  She blinked. ‘You do?’

  He nodded. ‘Your breasts are fuller, more responsive than ever. And you have those deliciously enticing marks on your stomach that I can trace right down to your—’

  ‘That’s enough!’ Caro squeaked.

  ‘Not nearly enough,’ Jake murmured, and he moved so that the length of his body was only inches away from hers. ‘Having a child has only made you more beautiful. Last night was wonderful.’ His voice lowered huskily. ‘Deliciously erotic…’

  ‘Stop it, Jake!’ she protested desperately, his words swiftly bringing back the memory of how his lips had travelled the length of her body before he had— ‘You really do have to stop talking like this,’ she repeated weakly.

  ‘No, I really don’t, Caro,’ he insisted firmly, reaching out to grasp her arm as she would have thrown back the covers and turned to get out of bed. ‘We can build on last night,’ he insisted. ‘We can make something of our marriage again—’

  ‘No!’ Caro wrenched her arm out of his grasp, her eyes glittering fiercely now. ‘I don’t want to talk about any of this.’

  ‘Well, tough—because I do.’

  ‘I don’t care, Jake,’ she almost wailed. ‘It’s enough for me to tell you I will never be married to you again. Never!’ she repeated vehemently, and she turned to throw back the bed clothes to get out of bed and march across the room towards the bathroom.

  Initially she gave Jake an entirely enticing view of the fullness of her breasts, before she turned and showed him an even more provocative view of her bottom…

  Until the bathroom door slammed behind her and closed off his line of sight, that was.

  Jake lay back on the pillows, his hands once again behind his head, his expression grim as he stared up at the ceiling unseeingly.

  As much as Caro might want to forget last night had ever happened, Jake knew that he never would…

  CHAPTER NINE

  ‘GAVIN RANG WHILE you were in the shower.’ Jake turned to inform Caro as she entered the dining room half an hour or so later. He sat eating his breakfast with Magdalena, her happy smile showing she was none the worse for her upset last night.

  Caro had been disconcerted when she’d gone through to collect Magdalena from her cot and found her gone, but it hadn’t been too difficult to guess exactly who she had gone with.

  And she was disconcerted now by this scene of domesticity…

  She had initially gone to the kitchen to prepare Magdalena’s breakfast, but to her surprise Mrs Weaver had informed her that Jake had already fed the baby and was now in the dining room eating his own breakfast.

  Jake seemed to be taking his newly acquired paternal role far too seriously for her liking…

  ‘Gavin seemed a little concerned that his absent minded ness had resulted in my learning of Magdalena’s existence,’ Jake continued sarcastically, as Caro bent down to kiss the baby good morning.

  Caro straightened slowly; her brother was going to be more than ‘a little concerned’ when she next saw him. If Gavin had paid more attention to what was happening, then none of the last twenty-four hours would have happened.

  But that wasn’t entirely true, was it? Her confrontation with Jake would have happened—if not now, then at some time in the future, she acknowledged once again.

  She turned away to the side-dresser to help herself to a cup of coffee from the pot and a piece of toast she wasn’t sure she was going to be able to eat. How could she possibly swallow when her mouth was completely dry and her stomach churned into knots?

  Worse, one glance out of the window had shown her that more snow had fallen in the night. Far too much for her to be able to leave, as she had decided she would when she’d woken up this morning.

  ‘Is this not talking to me to be my punishment for last night?’ Jake asked impatiently at her continued silence.

  Caro’s cheeks flushed a fiery red. ‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ she snapped as she sat down next to Magdalena and tried to ignore how relaxed and attractive Jake looked this morning in faded blue jeans and a form-fitting black sweater.

  His mouth firmed. ‘So you are talking to me?’

  ‘On certain subjects, yes,’ she conceded tersely.

  Jake gave a teasing smile. ‘I can easily guess which subjects you consider taboo.’

  ‘Good—then you’ll know which ones to avoid, won’t you?’ Caro gave him a hard glance over the rim of her cup as she took a much needed sip of her coffee.

  Unfortunately her shower hadn’t refreshed her as it usually did. How could it when she’d only had to look in the bathroom mirror to see the slightly bruised look to her lips and the wildness of her hair from where Jake’s fingers had become entangled in its long length as they’d made love—several times!—the night before?

  As for the satisfying ache in her body—she didn’t even want to think about that.

  Caro’s hand was trembling so badly that she had to place her cup quickly back in the saucer before she spilt coffee all over her.

  ‘What did Gavin have to say about Christmas?’ She changed the subject abruptly as she kept her gaze determinedly on the table in front of her.

  ‘Merry…?’ Jake taunted.

  Caro looked up with a frown. ‘That was it?’ she muttered dis gust edly. ‘That was my irresponsible brother’s sole contribution to the mess he’s landed me in?’

  ‘You know Gavin.’ Jake shrugged.

  ‘Only too well!’

  Jake’s mouth compressed. ‘Caro, this is only a mess, as you call it, if you allow it to be,’ he pointed outpatiently.

  ‘No, Jake,’ she breathed wearily. ‘However you choose to look at this situation, it is a mess.’

  Jake sat back in his chair to look at her through lowered lids. Caro was still spoiling for that argument she had tried to have with him earlier. An argument Jake had no intention of taking part in. Not now. Not in the future, either.

  He gave another shrug. ‘Now that we’ve decorated the tree—’

  ‘You’ve decorated the tree,’ she corrected pettishly, making it plain to Jake that she wanted him to realise she had taken no part in the Christmas activity.

  ‘Magdalena and I have decorated the tree,’ he stated firmly. ‘That done,’ he continued, when Caro didn’t react, ‘I thought we could all go outside this morning and look for some holly to decorate the inside of the house.’

  ‘Holly?’ Caro stared at him incredulously. ‘I’m sure it hasn’t escaped your notice that there’s a foot of snow outside!’

  Jake nodded. ‘Admittedly some of us might be somewhat vertically challenged by the depth of the snow.’ He gave Caro’s lack of height a pointed look. ‘But it could still be fun, don’t you think?’

  She shook her head. ‘No, I don’t think!’

  He raised mocking brows. ‘Ever heard of ma
king the best of a bad situation, Caro?’

  ‘This isn’t bad, Jake—it’s catastrophic!’ she assured him with feeling, her expression of disgust turning to a chagrined frown as Jake began to laugh softly. ‘Would you care to tell me what you find so amusing?’

  ‘You,’ he acknowledged indulgently.

  Her mouth fell open. ‘Me?’

  ‘You.’ Jake sat forward to reach out and put his hand over the top of hers where it rested on the table-top, his fingers curling tightly about hers as she would have snatched that hand away. ‘Caro…’ His voice gentled as he looked up into the stiff rigidity of her face. ‘Can’t we just forget about the past? It would make all of this so much easier if you could.’

  ‘This?’ Caro echoed warily.

  He waved an ex pan sive hand. ‘Us.’

  ‘There is no us,’ she told him exasperatedly, finally managing to wrench her hand from beneath his—probably bruising her fingers in the process. ‘Last night was—’

  ‘Do not say last night was a mistake!’ he grated between clenched teeth.

  ‘We both know that it was an unnecessary complication,’ she groaned.

  Jake’s mouth thinned. ‘I’ve said I’m willing to forget about the past.’

  ‘You might be willing to forget about it, maybe. But I certainly can’t,’ she said.

  ‘Caro, I will not continue this argument in front of Magdalena,’ he told her firmly. ‘I heard more than enough arguments between my parents during my own childhood to want to put Magdalena through the same torment. As did you,’ he added.

  Caro had no idea when she had first become aware of her parents’ un hap pi ness together, but it certainly hadn’t been as a baby of Magdalena’s age. Although she did accept that their young daughter was capable of picking up on the tension around her…

  Caro gave an abrupt nod. ‘We’ll continue this conversation when Magdalena takes her morning nap.’

  Jake relaxed slightly. ‘And in the meantime can we all go outside to look for holly?’

  ‘I don’t remember you as being this much into Christmas,’ Caro said, giving him a perplexed frown.

  Jake smiled. ‘There’s a child in the house now.’

  Maybe that was what all this talk of ‘forgetting the past’ was about? Caro accepted heavily. Jake had made it more than obvious that he wanted Magdalena. And he must know that at this point in time Magdalena and Caro came as a package deal…

  ‘ADMIT IT, CARO—it was fun!’ Jake teased later, as Magdalena slept upstairs in her cot and the two of them sat beside the lit fire in the drawing room, drinking hot chocolate in order to thaw out from their venture into the snow looking for holly.

  Of which there had been an abundance at the bottom of the huge garden. And an old rope swing hanging from the huge oak tree there. Along with a tree-house nestling in its branches.

  This house—and the garden especially—had been built for a family, for children to live and play in…

  It was hardly the sort of house a man would buy for his mistress to live in.

  The thought came unbidden. And unwelcome. Because Caro could think of no other reason why Jake would have bought this house a year ago.

  Jake saw the look of determination on Caro’s face as she stood up to move over to the huge bay window, the weak December sun turning her hair to the same spun gold as the angel that now resided at the top of the decorated Christmas tree, with its dozens of brightly coloured lights twinkling so merrily.

  This really was the most perfect Christmas Jake had ever known—but he had a feeling that what Caro was about to say was going to change all of that!

  She kept her back towards him. ‘As I attempted to point out to you earlier this morning, what happened last night changes nothing.’

  ‘As neither of us used contraception last night, might I point out that it could change everything?’

  Caro turned swiftly, her eyes widening, the colour coming into her face and then as quickly fading as Jake’s gaze moved pointedly down to the slender slope of her belly. Where his child, Magdalena, had once nestled so safely. Where, after their lovemaking last night, another baby might already be taking up residence…

  ‘No!’ Caro’s gasp was agonised as that same realisation hit her, and her knees began to buckle beneath her.

  Jake dashed across the room and gathered Caro up into his arms before she made contact with the carpeted floor, holding her tightly against him as he carried her back to the chair and sat down with her still in his arms. It was a testament to how shaken Caro was even by the possibility of another pregnancy that she made no attempt to escape those restraining arms. Instead her head dropped down weakly against his shoulder.

  Jake looked down at her in concern, relieved to see that some of the colour was returning to the paleness of her cheeks. ‘Would that really be such a bad thing, Caro?’ he asked gently. ‘You’re asking me that?’ she groaned softly.

  ‘You don’t want more children?’ Jake moved so that he could look directly into Caro’s face. She was still a little paler than he would have wished, and her eyes had taken on a haunted dullness.

  ‘Of course I would like more children! Just—’

  ‘Just not with me, hmm?’ Jake realised, suddenly experiencing an icy feeling in his heart.

  Caro gave a pained frown, wondering how on earth the subject had jumped so quickly from their lovemaking last night to the possibility that she might be pregnant. Let alone how she came to be cradled in Jake’s arms, so aware of the hard warmth of his chest and the lean strength of his thighs!

  She shook her head even as she pulled out of Jake’s arms to stand up and move away from him. Away from the temptation those arms represented. ‘I’m sure that I won’t become pregnant from just our one night together,’ she said firmly.

  Jake scowled. ‘And if you do? Would you tell me this time, Caro? Or would you decide you have the right to keep the existence of another of my children from me?’

  She gave a shaky gasp at the raw pain she could hear beneath his accusation. ‘I never wanted it to be like this, Jake.’ She put a hand briefly over her eyes, before taking it away and looking at him. ‘It could all have been so different!’ Her voice broke emotionally. ‘I was so excited when the doctor confirmed my pregnancy. Couldn’t wait to get to New York and tell you about it. It was to be my first wedding anniversary gift to you—’

  ‘Just a minute, Caro,’ Jake interrupted slowly, suddenly tense as he sat forward in his chair to look up at her intently. ‘Are you telling me that you changed your mind about the trip to New York? That you were coming to join me after all?’

  She nodded. ‘I told my editor I was going, had my flight booked, when—when I received the telephone call that changed everything.’

  Jake looked stunned now. ‘What telephone call? I deliberately didn’t call you from New York.’

  ‘I’m well aware of that!’ Caro ex claimed painfully.

  ‘I had been looking forward to sharing pre-Christmas New York with you,’ Jake explained. ‘I thought we could go ice-skating together, walk around all the lighted shops. I was so damned angry with you for not going with me that I deliberately didn’t call you. Extremely childish of me—I realise that now—but at the time I hadn’t expected to be delayed for that extra day, and in doing so miss spending our first wedding anniversary altogether.’

  ‘Did you even care?’ Caro scorned.

  ‘Of course I damn well—!’ Jake stopped and drew in a controlling breath. ‘You were already packed and ready to leave me when I did get back.’ He suddenly looked agonised. ‘I didn’t even have the chance to tell you about—’ He broke off abruptly.

  ‘To tell me what?’ Caro prompted when he didn’t go on.

  ‘It doesn’t matter now,’ Jake dismissed with a shrug.

  ‘No. You’re right. It doesn’t matter,’ she acknowledged wearily. ‘We were all wrong for each other from the start, Jake. We wanted different things from life,’ she said sadly. ‘You were pe
rfectly happy with our life in London—your business, the penthouse apartment, the meaningless round of parties. Whereas I…’ She gave a rueful shake of her head. ‘I was tired of all those things, Jake. Oh, I enjoyed my career still—but the other things…?’ She grimaced. ‘I wanted a home and a family. A real home and a real family with you.’

  ‘Do you think I didn’t know you well enough to realise that?’ Jake stood up abruptly, a scowl still darkening his brow as he stood only feet away from her. ‘Why else do you think I bought this house a year ago?’

  ‘I know exactly why you bought this house, Jake!’ Caro said angrily.

  ‘Then—’

  ‘How could you?’ she accused, her eyes dark with pain as tears sparkled on the darkness of her lashes. ‘How could you bring Magdalena and I to a house you initially bought for your mistress?’

  ‘What?’ Jake barked. ‘What the hell are you talking about, Caro?’ His hands were clenched at his sides as he stared at her disbelievingly. ‘I bought this house for you, damn it. It was meant to be a surprise. A first wedding anniversary gift.’

  Caro stared at him.

  Jake had bought this house for her…? As a wedding anniversary gift…?

  Oh, dear God…

  CHAPTER TEN

  ‘YOU EITHER ARE PREGNANT , Caro, or this fainting is becoming a habit!’ Jake attempted to tease her as he felt her beginning to stir in his arms.

  Once again he had managed to catch her before she actually fell, gathering her up in his arms to carry her back to the armchair. Caro had been completely out of it this time, and the longer she’d remained unconscious the more worried Jake had become.

  She had regained her senses several minutes ago but had remained silent, unwilling for a moment to give up the luxury, the sheer joy, of being held in Jake’s arms. She would surely have to once he learnt of the assumption, the complete mistake she had made a year ago. Of the way she had denied him knowledge of his daughter because of that mistake…