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  “Uh, yeah,” she said, hand resting on her chest. She always wore a seahorse necklace given to her by her boyfriend of two and a half years. However, she wasn’t wearing it today.

  “Tory, what happened with Adam?” I was worried. She took a deep breath. A small tear traveled down the path of her pale cheek.

  “It’s over,” she sniffled. The whole time we’d been talking she was staring down at the magazine. And now I knew why: Her face was puffy – a deep shade of red, chocolate brown eyes wet with salty tears.

  “Tor, what happened?” I asked, giving her a much-needed hug. She sobbed against me, sniffling once again.

  “He just called me up and said we needed to end things.”

  “What?” I gasped. “Why?”

  “Adam…met someone else.” That was her biggest fear – having a long distance relationship and having another girl take him from her. They’d been together since their freshman year of university. But Adam was going to Penn State University after transferring out of New York University last year so it was a struggle for them to see each other as often as they’d like to. As far as I knew they planned on marrying one another. Obviously Adam’s plans had changed.

  Although Tory loved to party and drink she never cheated on Adam. Ever. She knew her limit with alcohol. And if guys hit on her and they didn’t get the message that she was taken she’d kick them in a place no guy would like to be harmed. I’d never seen anyone love another being so much. I was completely appalled by this situation that was causing my friend total and complete pain.

  “He said he’s in love with her…she’s something new. Like she’s a car he just bought or whatever. It’s sickening.” She sulked, both hands covering her eyes so she could hide behind them as she cried some more.

  “Oh my goodness, Tory,” I whispered, “I’m so sorry.” I gave her another hug. “When did this happen?”

  “Last night after Jensen left.”

  Jensen . . . .

  “Why didn’t you come to me then?”

  “I didn’t want to bother you,” she sighed.

  “You wouldn’t have bothered me,” I explained, a knot forming in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t like where this was going.

  “It’s just that I know you’re still like not all better so I didn’t want to concern you or anything with my like…petty problems.” She wiped at her eyes and nose. “I told Ryan, Lucy and Sam about it instead.” My poor friend. My best friend. She thought I wouldn’t – didn’t – care so she confided in three girls she partied with weekly; I called them the Drunken Trio. She’d only known them for a year and half. We’d known each other most of our lives.

  “Oh Tory you’ve got it all wrong. I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you!”

  Tory wasn’t the type to usually have problems she couldn’t solve on her own. She’d never really come to me with a situation before – especially nothing like this. She was a relatively independent person. But now she needed somebody. And that somebody was me. I wouldn’t allow it to be her drinking buddies. She needed a diary that could talk back to her not a bottle of vodka to bury her sorrows in.

  “Thanks, Ava.” She smiled halfheartedly.

  “What you need,” I said, “is a girl’s night.” Her eyes lit up. I couldn’t believe I’d actually suggested that. My body was craving some normalcy. It was just unfortunate that something ordinary would stem from such a devastating situation. Somehow Jensen’s presence had really struck something within me – change. I wanted to be different, to morph back into the fun-loving, awesome girl many people befriended and I was proud of just one year ago. By sulking non-stop I hadn’t overcome anything and I hadn’t forgiven him for what he had done to me.

  Maybe I never would forgive him. At least, not entirely. It’s not just something a person can get over. However, I needed to convince my mind to let go of what happened all those months ago so I could finally embrace what destiny had planned for me.

  “Aw, Avalon, that would be wonderful!” We hadn’t had a girl’s night in or out since our unsuccessful trip to the movies a while back. “Popcorn and DVDs?” she asked, hopeful, implying she wanted to stay in for the night – something Tory wasn’t too fond of. She was always out and about, mostly at parties thrown all over town. Otherwise she was throwing them. She was very into the partying lifestyle, especially now that she’d made friends with the trio of drunken nights and hung-over mornings. Each and every one of them had enough money to support their nasty habit.

  One thing I came to realize though – people who came from money flocked together. I hadn’t had much money growing up but that didn’t matter to Tory. We bonded over other things; like our interest in eating glue sticks in pre-school, crushing on twin brothers, Brady and Bryan Webber in the fourth grade, and taking an interest in the fine arts in high school. I always wondered why her parents didn’t send her to a fancy private school. But my guess was her parents wanted her to be well rounded alongside children who didn’t have as much as she did. That’s what had kept her relatively humble over the course of her life. Tory was the most generous person I’d ever met . . . and not only with material things.

  “Sure thing,” I smiled. She jumped off the chair and immediately headed for the 62” flat screen TV in our universal living room – one of the only rooms in the house that was considered ours; although we barely ever just stayed on our sides of the home anyway. It was such a huge place for only two people. It could get lonely at times.

  Tory glanced at a couple movie titles that appealed to her. “Could you make some popcorn?” she called.

  “Yeah,” I said. I took out the popcorn and watched it spin around in the stainless steel microwave.

  Once the popcorn was done, I put the airy, buttery treat into a bowl and headed for the couch. Tory had picked out a musical for us to watch – a movie we’d seen a dozen times long ago. I had sworn myself off of romance but it was Tory’s choice. I wasn’t going to let her down . . . not again. We viewed the musical, nibbling on the salty popcorn and verbally admiring the vintage costumes used on all the characters on more than one occasion.

  A feeling I couldn’t control swept over me – was it compassion? Happiness? I couldn’t tell just yet. It caused my stomach to twitch with satisfaction. Then the uneasy feeling filled my gut once more, the same one that was there yesterday when I was face-to-face with Jensen. I tried not to think about it. I took slow, deep breaths to calm my nerves. What was there to be nervous about? After what had happened between us I highly doubted Jensen would ever want to see me again. But maybe I wasn’t feeling this way because of that. Maybe subconsciously I wanted to see him once more.

  After the movie concluded Tory and I talked about what happened between her and Adam. All I had to say was I was glad she was out of that relationship. As much as I thought they made a great couple she deserved better than someone like him. I knew that eventually we’d see eye-to-eye on this topic. Following that she brought up Jensen. Although I felt a bit uncomfortable to hear more about him I didn’t want to dissuade Tory in any way. After all this was the girl time she needed. And if she wanted to talk about Jensen then she had every right to . . . as long as she didn’t go too far.

  She explained to me how they knew each other and hung out but never had an attraction towards one another. In my opinion that seemed hard to believe considering he was gorgeous. I discovered he was twenty-three and that his last name was Marx. His family was originally from somewhere in Europe. Both parents died of a virus unknown to Tory. He was an only child and grew up in multiple foster homes. His maternal parents had left a ton of money for him in their wills so he was well off. He didn’t attend university but he had previously been employed at a couple places one would turn their nose down to. He was currently working at Old Tily’s Convenience Store about five minutes into town. If Jensen had so much money I wondered why he worked there of all places.

  “So what are you implying?” I asked after she was done. “That I shou
ld see him again?”

  “I honestly feel that he’d be good for you, Ava. I mean you said it yourself – he sparked something in you – anger. Something you hadn’t felt in like forever.” I hadn’t opened up much to Tory about my situation. But I was able to tell her the basic things about my psyche.

  “I guess.” I couldn’t get involved with anyone right now. Especially not Jensen Marx, could I?

  “Jensen’s a trustworthy guy. You shouldn’t have a problem with him,” she stated, putting the empty popcorn bowl on the coffee table in front of us. “And from what you’ve told me he seems to be interested in you,” she added, gleaming now. “When he walked in here yesterday the first thing he did was look at the picture of you in the foyer. You know, your graduation photo from senior year? Well he liked it. A lot.” She giggled.

  After what happened with her own relationship it was nice to see her preoccupied by playing matchmaker with me. I’d let her have her fun . . . for now.

  “I don’t know, Tory,” I sighed. “I haven’t been on a date since –”

  “That idiot hurt you, I know.” She sounded almost annoyed as she cut me off. “Come on, Ava. Give him a chance!” She took both of my hands in hers. “Avalon, you’re my best friend,” she spoke, looking into my eyes. “This year has been rough on me, your mom – especially you, I know. But you have to realize that life moves on. And it does get better.” She sounded like one of those motivational speakers at an OA meeting preaching to men and women alike that outside of fattening foods there was a world full of fresh fruits and veggies waiting to be consumed in moderation. I let her continue with her pep talk.

  “What that jerk did to you last summer…well that was just wrong. And stupid. And selfish. And vile. And repulsive. But Avalon he’s not around anymore. And he won’t be ever again. I can promise you that.”

  My body made an involuntary move when she said promise. “But you don’t know that for sure.” I shivered.

  “No, I don’t. Not for sure. But if he ever sets foot on my property again I’ll have him arrested for trespassing . . . and for what he put you through.”

  Tory was tiny but tough. She almost always got what she wanted, and that freaked me out a bit. That meant she could have my rapist arrested. Why I saw that as such a bad thing was honestly beyond me.

  “You said you wouldn’t tell anyone.” I was embarrassed, ashamed and ultimately scared of what might happen.

  “I know,” she sighed, eyes defeated. “But if he shows up again, Avalon I’ll have no choice.”

  I hadn’t realized how much of a burden it was to have this on her shoulders – and to not be able to tell anyone about it – without feeling guilty for sharing the horrific details. What happened shocked her just as much as it did me. Up until that night Tory and he got along just fine. Better than fine even. She really liked him and thought he and I would last forever. I remembered us talking about him and Adam for nights on end, gushing about how much we loved our boyfriends.

  It’s ten months later and look where we are now.

  With that she helped to put things into perspective: Live my life the best way I possibly could – healthy and with an open mind. With an open mind anything was possible. And by anything she meant Jensen Marx.

  FOUR.

  I hadn’t visited the busy city of Empire at all since I’d been here.

  Today I was determined to get out of the house and see Jensen. I didn’t know why I was so eager to see him again but since the day we’d met – last week, today – I couldn’t get him off my mind – like something was drawing me towards him and my mind and body couldn’t take the strenuous waiting any longer. I was wearing a knee-length nude sundress and rosy pink sweater with nude lace-up Army boots to match. The loose curls of my hair bounced as I walked. I’d forgotten how it felt to feel good about myself. The very least content.

  I saw Old Tily’s Convenience Store. I inched my way closer and spotted Jensen stacking the shelves with cans. He looked incredibly attractive, even with his purple work vest and faded jeans. My stomach was in knots. I was getting closer, slowly – like a shark sneaking up on its prey. That’s when he saw me. And to my surprise looked . . . happy.

  “Hello, Miss Montage,” he grinned. “You’re wearing something other than your nightwear, I see.”

  “Ha, yeah,” my voice shook. “I’m in public.”

  He smirked. “What brings you to Old Tily’s?”

  “Oh, you know,” I said, glancing at the shelf he was stocking, “lima beans.”

  “Well we have a fine selection.”

  “I know you do. And I already know which can I want.” I used to be the queen of flirting back before I dated that monster. I felt the slight adrenaline rush flow through my veins with urgency. It was greatly unexpected and I liked it.

  “Take your pick,” he said, showing me the different varieties. “But they’re all the same,” he laughed.

  “No,” I responded, getting closer to him. “Not all of them. One can stands out from the rest.”

  Am I suicidal? Do I want this flirtatious-act to turn sour on me?

  “You mean the expired can all the way in the back?”

  “Um, no.”

  Does Jensen realize what I’m getting at? Or do I sound ridiculous?

  “Well in that case I’ll let you choose since you seem to know more about canned lima beans than I do.” He was about a half a foot away from me when I picked up a can.

  “Alright,” I said coolly, “I have what I want.” My heart squeezed against my ribcage, tightening ever so slowly.

  Jensen chuckled and moved closer. I could feel his warm breath on my cheek, so inviting and smelling exceptionally good. The aroma satisfied my head. “Avalon you know those are string beans, right?”

  “Uh,” I looked at the can of beans in my possession. “Yeah, just what I wanted,” I smiled. I couldn’t believe I had gotten this far in the conversation. I was making a complete fool of myself.

  He laughed. “Avalon, you are certainly something else.”

  Considering I don’t even like beans, period, I guess he could say that.

  “So,” he said, eyes piercing through me like blue daggers, “what really brings you here?”

  “You,” I said, clearing my throat.

  “Oh.” He genuinely looked surprised. “What can I do for you?”

  It took all my courage and inner strength to tell him what I wanted to say: “Take me out. Tonight.” My breath caught in my throat as I waited for his reaction or response. “I want to talk to you.”

  “A woman in charge,” he mused, “I like that.” He then winked at me.

  “What else do you like?” I urged. We were so close now.

  I couldn’t believe how comfortable I was around him. And so quickly, too. In a way this scared me. Before him I hadn’t talked to a man in way too long. I deeply hated feeling so uncomfortably comfortable around him. It was unexpected and a little drastic compared to my previous state of mind. But I wasn’t going to waste this. He was just what I wanted. I needed to know more about this guy – this immaculate gift from G-d.

  “Midnight strolls on the beach, fine dining, dancing, a beautiful woman on my arm,” he paused, “who I can keep.” I don’t believe he meant to be so charming. It just came natural to him.

  Whoa, what am I doing here?

  What happened to the shy, timid, reserved girl I was all year? What did Jensen have that other people, specifically men, lacked?

  “I get off work now actually.” He took off his vest and said goodbye to his colleagues.

  Until then I hadn’t noticed anyone else was in the store: a mother pushing her child in a carriage who was gawking at Jensen’s hard-to-ignore presence, two employees stacking shelves and three male teens throwing candy at one another. Jensen had been my main focus the whole time. I neglected to see what was going on around me. Very strange.

  “Where to?” he asked before I could get a word in.

  “Oh,” I gasped. �
��I wasn’t expecting us to do anything until later. I’m not dressed for anything too fancy.”

  “You look absolutely stunning.” Jensen smiled and we began walking together, side by side. His shoulders were broad, strong. He wasn’t too much taller than me but simply being next to him made me feel safe and protected. Again, very strange.

  We continued walking a few blocks down from the store and entered a quaint restaurant. Jensen asked for a table outside because the weather was nice. Once we were seated I could smell the aroma of the lake and the appetizing Asian cuisine being served around us. Across the way the sun was setting, gleaming off of the clear ocean water.

  A waitress came by to give us our menus. She was gawking at the sight of Jensen. He didn’t seem to notice, naturally. His eyes – such a remarkable shade of blue – were gazing into mine. He sent shivers throughout my entire body.

  “Hi, my name is Rosemary. I’ll be your server this evening.” She seemed too bubbly, flipping her hair so the scent of her floral perfume wafted in the air. “Our special today is the Peeking Duck with Chinese Vegetables,” she paused to get closer to Jensen. “It’s very delicious.” I truthfully couldn’t believe her behavior so I cleared my throat loudly. She backed away from Jensen a bit and continued with her routine speech, “Would you like to start off with drinks?” Her focus was still only on Jensen’s difficult-to-neglect presence, ignoring me all together.

  She was a curvy woman with luscious long black hair and a fair complexion. She wore red lipstick, allowing her white teeth to appear even whiter. Long red nails with sparkly decals tapped on her apron, which brought my attention to her outfit: the completely black ensemble accentuating every part of her voluptuous body. She was stunningly beautiful and I felt intimidated by her presence. And yet Jensen was still looking at me. Why? I hadn’t a clue.

  “I’ll have a water with lemon. Extra ice,” he said. “And she’ll have –”

  “Sweetened iced tea, please,” I finished. Before now I couldn’t remember the last time I’d eaten out.