Love, Kinsey Read online

  “It is, huh? It really is.” Rosemary sighed and kissed

  Kinsey on the cheek, “Baby girl, you can write whatever story you want. You can have all the pages in the world to tell your story. I’ll give this the green light all the way. You let me know if you need anything, okay?”

  Kinsey nodded and Rosemary motioned for me to come over. I walked over and they both embraced me. Because of her close relationship with Kins, Rosemary had subsequently become a mother figure to me as well.

  We stayed in Rosemary’s office for a little while longer.

  Kinsey wrote the list of her four exes and left the place to seek out Old Paul, the paper’s notorious gossip. At 60 years of age, he was a whiz at all the social networking sites and could find anyone.

  “Colby, how are you holding up?” Rosemary asked after Kins left. I looked up at her red-rimmed eyes and shook my head.

  “This sucks, Rose. It really blows. I’m going to lose my best friend.” I swallowed and then cleared my throat. I knew if I said anything else I was going to lose it, and I really didn’t want to be caught crying at work.

  Rosemary made a tsk-tsk noise and wiped her eyes one more time. “Let me ask a blunt question. Does it bother you about her dream? Or about her finding these exes?”

  Any other normal guy would say hell yes in a heartbeat. Nobody had ever accused me of being normal though.

  I knew Kinsey; she was my best friend and fiancée. And she never kept secrets from me, whether I liked the truth or not. I knew about each of her past boyfriends and it didn’t bother me. They had made her who she was, each one taking a part of her heart and sculpting it to what it was presently, and in all truthfulness, I appreciated them.

  I appreciated their love for her and her love for them and never once worried about her wanting to go back and try again with any of them.

  With that in mind, I shook my head no. Rosemary smiled, “You are one of a kind, son. One of a kind. I’m granting you as much time off as you need to accompany Kinsey on any trips she needs to take.”

  “Thank you, Rosemary.” I gave her one last hug and left her office in search of Kinsey and Old Paul.

  ***

  KINSEY

  Ideas were literally swimming from side to side in my brain while I sat with Old Paul. The journalist part of me was working at full speed. Writing a vanity piece about me was going to be hard, and it would feel narcissistic all the way to the end. Regardless, I felt like my last story should be my own.

  I wanted to do more. I wanted to make a bucket list and cross everything off, I wanted to finally marry Colby, even though it would be a short-lived marriage. I wanted one more girls’ night out with my best friends Jamie and Courtney, and one more day with my brother.

  My head started to hurt and I told Old Paul I would get with him tomorrow to find out what he was able to get. I found Colby waiting for me at my desk and we left the place together.

  In the car, he clammed up. I hated myself for putting him through this. He had never known heartbreak before, never had to grieve for anyone. He was one of those lucky ones that still had both sets of grandparents alive and well and everyone in perfect health. I knew he was hurting and I hated it.

  “Hey, do you want to see what Keaten is doing? Maybe meet him somewhere for lunch?” I suggested.

  I had told him about the diagnosis that morning. After getting my text, he came over to the house and we cried together. My baby brother – the difference was by four years, but sometimes it felt like a decade and sometimes it felt like he was the older one – was devastated, and so was I. He was one of my favorite people on this earth; it was going to suck having to leave him. When he left, I promised to call later on.

  Colby nodded, “Yea that would be nice.” We decided to meet at a local burger place. Keaten arrived looking upbeat and happy, a total 180 from this morning.

  “Keats, you look good. How was your morning?” I asked after hugging him tight. He shook Colby’s hand and sat down.

  “Well, you know, it was alright. I called in to work, told them I had to run some errands. Went to see Mom and Dad for a little bit, too.”

  “How are they?” Colby asked.

  “Dad looked like crap. Mom was mopey. They’re depressed.” Keaten answered bluntly, “But you know, Kinsey, everything will be okay. I told them to snap out of it and make the most of everything.”

  I held back a laugh imagining that conversation. Keaten had always been the bold one out of the two of us. Got in trouble more times than I can remember for his mouth.

  “That’s true. I don’t want them to be sad all the time. It doesn’t make anything better.” I answered.

  “Don’t worry Kinsey, we’re gonna be brave for you. We’re gonna make the most of things while we still have you around.” Colby smiled, took my hand and kissed it.

  We ordered lunch and made small talk. Towards the end of the meal, Keaten asked Colby’s permission to steal me away the next day.

  Colby nodded, eyebrow raised, and Keaten smirked at him. He agreed and Keaten’s face broke out into a grin.

  “It’s gonna be a big sis and baby bro day tomorrow then, Kinsey. We haven’t had one of those in a while.” He announced, visibly happy.

  “What about work dude? You can’t just go missing all these days for me.” I asked incredulously.

  “I got it covered. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll pick you up tomorrow mid-morning. I gotta go though, have some more stuff to do. I love you, sis.” He stood up and kissed the top of my head. After reaching into his pocket, he threw two $20s on the table and clapped Colby on the spine.

  “I’ll text you details, bro. Take care of my sister.”

  “Always. Later, Keats.” Colby replied.

  After he went away, I was still slightly confused. My brother acted like everything was okay. Not that I wanted him to be miserable, but he was just acting so peculiar. I pushed the thought to the back of my mind and enjoyed the rest of my day with Colby.

  Chapter 4

  KINSEY

  The next day Keaten pulled up in his bright yellow Jeep. I watched him out the window as he jumped out and ran a hand through his windblown honey colored hair.

  He walked right in, not bothering to knock. I was glad Colby had already left for the office. He and Keaten were good buds, but that was a pet peeve of Colby’s.

  I laughed, though; my brother was always welcomed in my home, whether he knocked or not.

  “Ready to go, beautiful?” he asked. I nodded, grabbing my purse off the hook by the door.

  Twenty minutes later, Keaten pulled into the parking lot of one of the most luxurious spas in town. The building was two stories high with a beautiful angel fountain in front.

  “Bella’s Spa? Dude, seriously? You’re not that rich, Keats!” I jested. He just laughed in response as he climbed out of his Jeep. He came to my side and opened the door.

  “Come on, big sis. Time to get pampered.”

  ***

  An hour later, I was lying face down on a table, covered with a soft, fuzzy blanket. Keaten was on the table a few feet away.

  He had sat patiently, taking pictures and reading a magazine, while I had a mani-pedi earlier. My nails were a beautiful, sea foam green.

  “Keats, I don’t know how to thank you for all this. It’s been so nice.”

  “You’re welcome, Kinsey. You deserve it.”

  The masseuses came in and turned the lights down. Calm music filled the room next. My body instantly relaxed as the masseuse went to work.

  My mind wandered as strong hands gently kneaded the knots on my frail back. I looked over to Keaten who looked to be falling asleep. His eyes were closed and his mouth was open slightly.

  Memories of him coming into my room long ago came flooding into my mind. He had been a very scared little boy and any noise, no matter how small, would send him running into my room.

  “Kinsey, can I sweep with you?” He would ask, holding on to his favorite stuffed animal, a b
lue parrot he named Wucky.

  “Yes, Keaten. Come on, little dude,” would always be my answer.

  Secretly, him coming to me made me feel superior, like I was his hero. When he grew out of it around the age of nine, I was a little sad. My parents never reprimanded him, even though they knew what was going on. And in that span of five or six years, my brother became my favorite person in the world. He became my best friend.

  “Psst, Kins! You asleep?” Keaten whispered. My eyes fluttered open and Keaten was smirking at me.

  “No, my name’s not Keaten, sir snores-a-lot.” I chided him. He smiled and rolled his eyes.

  “Hey, I was just resting my eyes.” He smiled, his dimples showing.

  “Thanks again for this-”

  “Shh, don’t say that word again, Ki Ki. I wish I could do more,” Keaten cut me off then laughed suddenly, “Ha! I haven’t called you Ki Ki in forever.”

  “I know, right. Ki Ki was an awesome nickname.”

  A calmness settled over the room and we were silent for the rest of the massage. Subsequently, we received facials and a seaweed mud body wrap. I was shocked at the kind of spa package Keats had bought. It was such a sweet gesture and tears threatened to fall several times if I thought about it too much.

  The staff directed us to a hot tub at the end of the building once the wraps were off.

  “You must think I’m a metrosexual for liking all this girly stuff,” Keaten declared, stepping into the tub. The water bubbled vigorously and the tiny waves lapped against the side.

  Raising an eyebrow, I replied, “My brother? Never. You’re the manliest man I know.” The truth was, Keaten had always been one of those men who spent hours getting ready and fixing his gorgeous hair.

  “Hey, a man can appreciate some TLC.” He smiled and it quickly faded. He started chewing his bottom lip and frowned.

  “What’s wrong, Keats?”

  “Kinsey, I just… I wanted to do something for you. Just to get your mind off everything. But it all feels like nothing.” On the last word, his voice faltered and he quickly cast his head down and rubbed his eye.

  “No Keaten. It means everything to me. You didn’t have to do any of this, but you did. And that means the world.” I scooted closer to him and ruffled his hair. He looked up.

  “I’m scared. I’m scared of losing you and scared to live my life without you in it. You have no idea how much you mean to me. My whole life… I don’t have one childhood memory without you in it. All my friends, they had bitchy older sisters and jerk-off older brothers. But not me. You have always been my best friend and I don’t want to lose you.” His confession was barely above a whisper, tears spilling freely from his gorgeous eyes. My throat tightened as I hugged him.

  “You’re my best friend, too, baby bro.”

  We sat there for a few more minutes in silence. I hated myself for causing Keaten such heartache. I hated my stupid tumor and that damn brain of mine. Anger coursed through my body and I stood up suddenly.

  “Come on, I’m getting hungry. How about May’s Steak House? My treat.”

  “Nah, this is my day to spoil you. So my treat.” Keaten said getting out of the hot tub.

  “You are so stubborn,” I giggled.

  We went into our different locker rooms and changed. I felt like a new woman. For once, my head wasn’t throbbing and my stomach wasn’t aching. My muscles were relaxed, my skin rejuvenated. I changed back into my light blue sundress and applied some fresh make up before I was ready to go.

  May’s Steak House was packed. The old rustic tables and chairs were all full. A staple of our youth, it had never changed. Old May eventually handed the place to her son Stan, an old classmate of my parents. Every Friday we would go there to eat. It was something I looked forward to; I was never tired of being with my family.

  Keaten and I ended up having to wait for a table to clear up. The waitress, a curvy brunette named Lori, did her best to flirt with Keaten, which had me stifling a chuckle. She was persistent, finding any chance she had to touch his shoulder, or call him honey.

  Keaten was oblivious to her and as we sat down, she sulked off.

  “Oh Keats, you hurt her feelings.” I said. He raised an eyebrow and cast a devilish grin.

  “I know Lori’s madly in love with me. She simply cannot take a hint to save her life. Even after she nearly sexually assaulted me in Boon Dock’s one night,” he shook his head, “I can’t help that I’m irresistible. It’s a curse.”

  “Ah, Boon Dock’s, I haven’t’ been there in so long.”

  “You and Colby should go. You know, if you ever feel up to it.”

  Sighing, I spread out my menu. Boon Dock’s, our town’s only honky-tonk, was another place I loved but hadn’t been to in forever.

  “It sounds like a plan Stan.” I answered.

  “Did I hear my name?” A voice boomed, making me jump in my seat. A meaty hand clapped Keaten on the shoulder and I looked up into the face of Stan, May’s owner. You couldn’t help but smile when he was around. He was a big man, with friendly green eyes and a smile plastered on his reddened face at all times.

  “Hey Stan.” I stood and greeted him with a hug.

  “My favorite kids in the whole world.” Stan declared, his deep voice vibrating throughout my whole body as he gently hugged me back. He pushed me away slightly and his eyes searched my face with sadness.

  “Your parents told me, Kinsey. I’m so sorry,” tears glistened and he pulled me back for another hug. I breathed deep and stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek.

  “Not your fault, big Stan.” I sat down as Keaten stood up and hugged Stan as well. It was one of those man hugs where they grasped hands and threw the other arm around each other.

  “Well, what will it be? I saw ol’ Lori over here with y'all and figured I’d come save you.” Stan laughed, his booming chuckle making Keaten smile big. We placed our orders and he departed.

  “So, did I do good, big sis?” Keaten asked.

  “Yes, baby brother. Today has been really great! I’ve really enjoyed it, but you know you could’ve taken me to the dollar movie theater and that would’ve been just fine.”

  “Yea, I know. You’ve always been a cheap date.” Keaten joked. I scoffed in mock anger.

  If you could miss people after you died, I knew I would definitely miss my sweet brother. I hated that I would never see him get married or hold his future children. Then again, maybe I would be able to see it from Heaven; I had no idea.

  I cleared my mind because those kind of thoughts would open the waterworks and I wanted to enjoy the rest of my brother-sister date. There was no time to grieve over time I wouldn’t have; only time to enjoy what I did have.

  We spent two hours at May’s. Stan came out several times and sat with us when it wasn’t crowded. Keaten even picked out a few songs on the ancient jukebox. We danced to a few country songs, oblivious to any onlookers. Just as we did when we were children.

  “You know who I want to see you end up with?” I asked quietly, my head on Keaten’s shoulder. Keaten muttered an unintelligible response so I treaded carefully, “Jamie.”

  Keaten took a deep breath.

  “Jamie Jones, huh? Don’t you think that would be a little weird?” He asked.

  I lifted my head and glared at him, “Why? That whole getting-to-know-you awkward stage would be gone. She was your first kiss, after all.”

  “Yea, I know. And she’s a major babe. But I’ve grown up around her. Hell, she’s like extended family. It’s just kinda funny.” He adjusted his hand and cleared his throat, “But yea, she’s a hottie.”

  “And smart, sweet, independent, a good cook. Et cetera, et cetera.”

  “Has she said anything about me?”

  “Oh dear brother, unfortunately, every one of my friends has asked about you a time or two.” I rolled my eyes.

  “I know, right. I’m a stud.” We both laughed and after I playfully slugged him on the arm, we continued dancing.

&nb
sp; My silly brother. All doubt was erased; after I was gone, I was definitely going to miss him.

  Chapter 5

  KINSEY

  A day after my day with Keaten, I decided to meet my two best friends for lunch. They were the only people left that I wanted to tell personally, before I focused on my last article.

  We met at an outside café. Jamie arrived first, wearing a pale pink sundress; her strawberry blond hair was fixed in a messy bun. She looked gorgeous as always. Jamie’s nickname was Sparkler because she was such a lively person. Always the one to crack jokes or tell you how she really felt.

  I think she knew, somehow, because her demeanor was very different from normal. She was quiet, sullen and looked at me with sad eyes.

  Courtney finally arrived, looking breathless and exhausted. “I am so sorry. Casson wanted to fight about wearing his pajama Batman shirt because of the silly cape.” She shook her head as we laughed. Courtney was an Air Force wife, so she was a single parent most of the time. Her husband was stationed at the Dyess Air Force Base, not far from Abilene. Her son, Casson, was three, and quite possibly the cutest boy in the world.

  “Oh Mama, you need to let him wear a cape when he wants to!” I said, playfully. Casson called me Aunt KK and had me wrapped around his little finger. He looked identical to Courtney, big brown eyes, a smatter of freckles on his porcelain face. He even had her light brown curly hair.

  She settled down at the table and looked at me expectantly. These young ladies, well, these girls were my sisters. I had known each one since grade school and we had been the three amigos all our life. I loved them with every molecule in my body, and I was about to tell them something that would permanently change both of their lives.