Uncle John's Creature Feature Bathroom Reader For Kids Only! Read online

  NIGHT-NIGHT

  A farmer in Syracuse, New York, has discovered a way to keep his milk cows happy and producing lots of milk: water beds. John Marshman put several water beds in his barn…and the cows love sleeping on them. “Sometimes the cows stand in line and wait for a cow to leave,” he said, “just so they can get in the same water bed.”

  GIRAFFE - A - MANIA

  In 1827 a giraffe named Zarafa came to Paris as a gift to King Charles X. The French, most of whom had never seen such a creature, went wild for it, calling it “Sweet Thing.” More than 100,000 people came to visit Zarafa and suddenly giraffe furniture, porcelain, and decorations were everywhere. Ladies wore gowns with themes like “Giraffe in love” and “Giraffe in exile.” Men tied “giraffe knots” in their ties. Most bizarre was the “à la giraffe” hairdo. It was so tall that the women who wore it had to sit on the floor of their carriages when they went out to a ball.

  DID YOU KNOW?

  • An adult giraffe can easily look into a second story window.

  • A giraffe’s neck can be six feet long but has only seven bones—just like a human’s.

  • A giraffe can clean its ears with its tongue. (Can you?)

  TALKING TREES

  A giraffe’s favorite food is the thorny acacia tree. It would strip a tree bare if the tree didn’t have a clever way to stop the giraffe from overeating. Once the animal begins nibbling its leaves, the acacia tree broadcasts a warning—like a chemical SOS—to the rest of the tree to move a bitter-tasting chemical called tannin from its roots and branches into its leaves. The tannin makes the leaves taste terrible, even to a giraffe. But the giraffe can’t just move on to another tree. The tree that was being munched on also warns nearby trees by sending a chemical warning into the air. Once the alarm is sounded, it takes less than 30 minutes for all of the trees in the grove to fill their leaves with tannin. The giraffes have learned that the best way to eat their favorite food is to just nibble a little bit and then move to another grove.

  WILD AND WOOLLY FACT

  The giraffe is one of the few animals born with horns. The horns lie flat against the skull when it is born and pop up during the giraffe’s first week of life.

  GOING APE!

  Life behind bars made this gang go a little stir crazy.

  In 1994 the baboons at the Emmen Zoo in Holland—all 120 of them—suddenly climbed into the trees in their compound and refused to come down. The zookeepers were baffled. The hamadryas baboons normally spent most of their time on the ground, but now they would come out of the trees only for dinner, and even then, they’d grab the food and race back to the treetops to eat. This continued for three days. Then suddenly, they came out of the trees and acted as if nothing had happened. What caused their three-day climbing expedition? No one knows for sure…but it did coincide exactly with the collision of Jupiter and the comet Shoemaker-Levy.

  WILD AND WOOLLY FACT

  The ancient Egyptians considered hamadryas baboons to be the sacred attendants of Thoth, the scribe (writer) of the gods.

  WASSUP?

  Most animals can’t talk, but hey, who needs words?

  CHIMPANZEES greet each other by touching hands.

  AN ADULT LION sends out messages with a roar that can be heard up to five miles away.

  WHEN TWO DOGS approach each other, the one that wags its tail slowly is the dominant dog.

  ELEPHANTS “hear” super-low frequency calls from other elephants over a mile away through the bottoms of their feet.

  CATS meow at humans but rarely at each other.

  GORILLAS stick out their tongues when they’re angry.

  THE ONLY KIND OF DOG that can’t bark is a basenji. It can, however, yodel.

  AND THE WINNER IS…

  TOP TEN LONGEST-LIVING LAND ANIMALS (AVERAGE LIFESPAN)

  1. Box turtle (100 years)

  2. Human (80)

  3. African elephant (40)

  4. Grizzly bear (25)

  5. Horse (20)

  6. Gorilla (20)

  7. Polar bear (20)

  8. White rhino (20)

  9. Black bear (18)

  10. Lion (15)

  TOP FIVE HEAVIEST LAND MAMMALS (AVERAGE WEIGHT)

  1. African elephant (16,500 lbs.)

  2. Hippo (9,900 lbs.)

  3. White rhino (8,000 lbs.)

  4. Giraffe (4,200 lbs.)

  5. Bison (2,200 lbs.)

  TOP TEN DOG NAMES

  1. Sam

  2. Max

  3. Lady

  4. Bear

  5. Buddy

  6. Maggie

  7. Bailey

  8. Jake

  9. Molly

  10. Sadie

  TOP FOUR FASTEST MAMMALS

  1. Cheetah (71 mph)

  2. Antelope (57 mph)

  3. Wildebeest (50 mph)

  4. Lion (50 mph)

  THE GREAT ESCAPE

  Never underestimate an animal’s resourcefulness.

  The plan was simple: first he’d paddle across the water-filled moat, using a log as a raft. Then he’d climb the cement wall, grab a bicycle, and pedal away. Unfortunately for Juan, a spectacled bear at the Berlin Zoo, the bicycle was chained to a bike rack and it wasn’t going anywhere. But that didn’t dampen Juan’s fun. He ambled away from the bike and spent half an hour frolicking on the zoo’s playground. While excited visitors snapped photos of Juan’s Day Out, nervous zookeepers shot him with tranquilizers.

  Though some parents were really concerned about their children’s safety, the zoo’s deputy director wasn’t worried. “Spectacled bears eat both vegetables and meat,” he said, “but children do not tend to be on their menu. I’d have been a lot more worried if one of our polar bears had escaped.”

  YOU BETTER RUN!

  If a STRIPED SKUNK does a handstand…

  Look out—it’s spray time!

  If a GRIZZLY BEAR stands on its hind legs and puffs its cheeks…

  It’s the grizzly way of saying, “My next meal is…you.”

  If a MUSK OX bows its head and presses its nose against its knee…

  This action releases a smelly liquid from a gland in its nose (musk!) and means this ox is about to stomp on you.

  If you hear a LEOPARD cough…

  It’s probably the last sound you’ll ever hear, because that’s what leopards do right before they pounce.

  If a CAPE BUFFALO starts smashing bushes with its horns…

  It’s giving you a little demonstration of what it’s going to do to your head.

  If a CHIMP stops grinning at you…

  Lips pressed together tightly means he’s about to play a serious game of tag—and you’re it.

  If a BLACK RHINO starts bouncing around like it’s had too much caffeine…

  Here it comes—the animal equivalent of a runaway train.

  If a FEMALE LION flicks her tail briskly from side to side while she stares at you…

  Uh-oh. She’s decided to have you for lunch.

  If a HIPPO turns his butt toward you and starts wagging his tail like a windshield wiper…

  He’s about to give you a dung shower—that’s the male hippo’s messy but oh-so-effective way of marking his territory.

  LOOK WHO’S TALKING

  Match the animal with its sound.

  1. bear

  a. gibbers

  2. fox

  b. snorts

  3. giraffe

  c. barks

  4. ape

  d. roars

  5. hippopotamus

  e. trumpets

  6. lion

  f. howls

  7. elephant

  g. bellows

  8. rhinoceros

  h. bleats

  9. wolf

  i. growls

  10. bull

  j. brays

  ANSWERS

  1-i (bears growl); 2-c (foxes bark); 3-h (giraffes bleat);

  4-a (apes gibber); 5-j (hippos bray); 6-d (lions roar);

  7-
e (elephants trumpet); 8-b (rhinos snort);

  9-f (wolves howl); 10-g (bulls bellow)

  ROYAL RIDES

  THE GREAT HORSE

  Alexander the Great conquered most of the known world (Europe and Asia) in the 4th century B.C. According to legend, he always rode into battle astride his black stallion, Bucephalus. Alexander’s father had owned the horse but could never tame it. Ten-year-old Alexander realized that the horse was afraid of its own shadow, so he turned Bucephalus to face the sun. Once it couldn’t see its shadow, it relaxed, and Alexander began to train it. Together, the duo traveled 11,000 miles in eight years. When Bucephalus died at the age of 30, Alexander named a town in Pakistan in his horse’s honor.

  NO HORSE SENSE

  The Roman emperor Caligula (A.D. 12–41) had a horse named Incitatus who lived in a marble stable with an ivory stall and purple blankets. Incitatus often wore a jeweled collar and had his own house with furniture and slaves.

  HORSE SHOES?

  Julius Caesar’s favorite horse had hooves that looked like human feet. Each hoof was split in five parts that resembled toes. When the colt was born, soothsayers predicted, “The master of this horse will one day rule the world.” Caesar made sure he became the master.

  ANIMALS TO THE RESCUE

  BACKSEAT DRIVER

  A schnauzer named Bitsy was in the passenger seat when her owner suffered a heart attack while speeding down a Texas freeway. Bitsy quickly turned the wheel so the car would leave the road and then bit her owner, Jesus Martinez, until his foot came off the accelerator. The car stopped safely on the side of the road and Martinez recovered in the hospital.

  CALL 911

  Lyric the Irish setter was trained to help Judy Bayly, who had asthma. Once when Bayly’s oxygen mask fell off during an asthma attack, Lyric knocked the phone off the hook and actually dialed the emergency number, saving Bayly’s life.

  GOOD DOGGIE!

  FOREVER FAITHFUL

  A bronze statue in Togliatti, Russia, honors the memory of a remarkably loyal German shepherd. When his owners were killed in a car crash, Faithful refused to move from the spot where they died. Townspeople brought Faithful food and water and tried to coax him into their homes, but the dog lived up to his name. He remained faithful to his owners until he died seven years later of old age.

  BREEDS APART

  Newfoundland dogs are strong swimmers. Why? They have webbed feet.

  The greyhound has the best eyesight of any dog breed.

  Great Danes can eat up to 8½ pounds of food a day.

  Chinese crested dogs can get acne.

  HOW OLD IS YOUR DOG?

  Want to figure out your dog’s true age in people years?

  1. Count the first full year as 15 years.

  2. Count the second full year as 10 years.

  3. Count all of the following years as 3 years apiece.

  So a 5-year-old dog would be:

  15 + 10 + 3 + 3 + 3 = 34 years old

  RAILROAD JACK

  One of South Africa’s most famous signalmen wasn’t a man—he was a baboon.

  In 1877 a railroad worker in South Africa named James Wide accidentally fell under a train and lost both of his legs. Without the use of his legs he could no longer work on the trains, so he became a signalman at Uitenhage Station near Port Elizabeth. His job: using a system of flags and flashing lights to signal trains to slow down or stop. Then he would pull a lever to transfer them to different tracks.

  Wide lived all alone near the station, struggling to get around on peg legs and crutches. One day he saw a trained baboon named Jack at a market in Uitenhage. Hoping the baboon might help him, Wide brought Jack home and they soon became fast friends. As time passed, Jack began to do chores around the house: pumping water, doing dishes, and working in the garden. Soon the baboon learned to help Wide at the railroad station, too.

  Locomotive drivers would blow four whistle blasts when they needed coal. Wide would hobble out on his crutches and hand them the key to the coal shed. One day Jack the baboon heard the whistle…and immediately raced to give the key to the locomotive driver. Soon, Jack was not only delivering keys but also giving the signals to the engineers and pulling the levers to switch the tracks. Jack did his job so well that the government gave him an employment number and a monthly paycheck.

  “Jack the Signalman” worked at his job for 13 years…and never made a single mistake.

  OTHER WORKING ANIMALS

  ASTRONAUT: Laika was the world’s first space traveler. Russian scientists shot the small dog into orbit in a satellite called Sputnik II on November 3, 1957.

  GUIDE DOG: The first guide dogs—German shepherds—were trained by the German government to assist blind war veterans at the end of World War I.

  LAB ASSISTANT: Rats’ keen sense of smell can detect diseases like tuberculosis and bladder cancer in laboratory samples. A rat can diagnose up to 2,000 lab samples a day; a human (using a microscope) can only diagnose 20.

  ’ROO

  You’ll find these critters in Australia.

  DID YOU KNOW?

  There are 45 kinds of kangaroos, including wallabies, walleroos, and pademelons.

  Male kangaroos are called boomers; females are flyers.

  If you lift a kangaroo’s tail off the ground it can’t jump.

  Kangaroos can go for months without water.

  A group of kangaroos is called a mob.

  1-2 PUNCH

  Kangaroos really do punch at each other when they fight. One prizefighting kangaroo escaped from a Japanese zoo and knocked out three men before two policemen who knew judo finally stopped him.

  THE ONE-EYED KANGAROO

  The true story of an Australian hero.

  In 1993 Lulu the kangaroo was found wounded in the pouch of her mother, who’d been killed by a car. The Richards family adopted the one-eyed western gray, and she quickly became one of the family, acting more like a dog than a kangaroo. As Mr. Richards worked around his ranch, Lulu was always at his side.

  While he was out inspecting damage from a bad storm, a branch fell on Richards and knocked him out. Lulu immediately tried to alert the family. Standing guard over the injured man, she barked like a dog until the family came running out to see what was wrong.

  According to Richards, “If it wasn’t for Lulu, I’d be pushing up daisies.” Her behavior was so extraordinary that Lulu became the first native animal to receive Australia’s National Animal Valor Award.

  ANIMAL CRACKERS

  One day an arctic explorer came face to face with a polar bear. Afraid of being eaten, he fell to his knees and started praying. When the bear knelt down beside him and started praying too, the man shouted, “It’s a miracle! I’m saved!”

  The polar bear opened one eye and said, “Shh! Please don’t talk while I’m saying grace.”

  What do you get if you cross a flea with a rabbit?

  Bugs Bunny.

  How do you stop a skunk from smelling?

  Hold its nose.

  What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

  Ice cream.

  Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

  Because the kids have to play inside.

  What do you call a flying ape?

  A hot-air baboon.

  What kind of beans do llamas like to eat?

  Llima beans.

  Q: WHAT IS IT???

  Its nose is billed like a duck’s.

  It lays eggs like a chicken.

  It has poisonous venom like a snake.

  It has sharp claws for digging like a mole.

  It has waterproof fur like a seal.

  It has a flat tail like a beaver.

  Its feet are webbed like an otter’s.

  When the first specimens of this Australian mammal were brought to England in 1798, the British thought it was a fake. What is it?

  Answer on the next page.

  A: IT’S A PLATYPUS!

  As odd as it looks, the duck-billed platypus is p
erfectly suited to live underwater and underground.

  The bill. The platypus’s bill isn’t hard like a bird’s beak—it’s made of soft cartilage, like your nose or ears. The bill is lined with tiny sensors that help the platypus find food in dark places.

  Babies. The duck-billed platypus lays eggs. Each egg is less than an inch long and sticks to the fur on the mother’s belly. The babies, called platypups, hatch after ten days and stay stuck to their mom until they are three to four months old. Only two other mammals lay eggs (they’re both in the anteater family).

  Claws. When the male platypus is attacked it protects itself by clawing at its enemy with the spurs on its hind legs. Those spurs really pack a punch—they’re filled with poisonous venom that’s strong enough to kill a dog.

  Habitat. You can find this weird and wonderful beast along the banks of freshwater rivers and lakes in Eastern Australia.

  MORE ZOO STORIES

  Hey! Stop monkeying around!